I recently began playing DnD after a 10 year lapse, wanting to get back in the game with a more roleplay based format, and joined an open seat group with a new DM who made a custom world, and wants to allow the party to do as they want and adapt the game to make it fun for everyone. My character joined maybe a couple of sessions after the campaign started and was introduced as the party saving him from bandits. There is no overarching quest, but I played it as my character is sticking with the party to repay the debt for helping him. In the second session, we go on our first mission together, and end up saving a wagon from goblins, though their hobgoblin leader made off with a child, however, immediately the party had been discussing how to extort the caravan in character just before the attack, and afterwards, begin mutilating the corpses to collect the bones (on character being a reborn skeleton that collects them) as my character looks visibly uncomfortable (him being a bugbear). One of the goblins I had managed to apprehend, and as the only one who spoke goblin, managed to convince him to lead us to the cave where the hobgoblin was planning to sacrifice the child in return for letting him live, relaying the promise I had made to the group. After we had gotten to the cave and took out the guard, I went to let the goblin go, and the warlock of the group fired off an eldrich blast to kill the goblin, which my character, wanting to keep his word, took to prevent the goblin being killed. However, he was unable to stop the second blast that instantly destroyed the goblin, and the reborn character immediately picked through to collect the bones, while the Warlock character then told mine, 'Never make a promise for me again'. None of the other characters backed up my character, and in fact everyone seemed perfectly fine with what happened, including the DM, who told me 'goblins are known for being untrustworthy'. Now he had established that the world we were in was fine with monstrous races, so a bugbear and a walking skeleton was no big deal walking into town. So now I'm in a conundrum on how to roleplay this.
On the IC side of things:
-My character just had a person he made a promise to brutally murdered and dissected in front of him.
-He is a bugbear, which travels in the same circles as goblins, and which we know as the goblin told us there were bugbears in the cave with the hobgoblin.
-There is no uniting goal of the party, this is literally a job boards quest.
On the OOC side:
-The DM doesn't want any character death this early in the campaign, which I assume also applies to characters leaving the party.
-No one in the party seems to see this as an evil act, because it was just a goblin.
So I'm trying to come up with some way to roleplay this. My character is basically neutral good, so I don't see betrayal as in him, but at the same time, I can't simple 'let it go' as this was clearly intended to hurt him on a deep and personal level. From the perspective of my character, there would be no reason for him not to leave the party, as what they did was cruel and sadistic to him. At the same time, he can't due due to the OOC restriction of not losing characters early game. I have been trying to contact the DM to discuss options, but I haven't got a reply yet, so I'm looking for advice, as the more I go over this, it seems like there no way for me to roleplay the character without breaking continuity, or results in character death or desertion. I don't want to be the person who drags the rest of the parties fun down and forces them to play the way I want, but I don't want to sacrifice my character so that the other character can feel superior in breaking his spirit. Does anyone have any advise or experience in a situation like this. Again, I'm trying to talk to the DM, but I'm looking for options in the mean time.
This sounds like a table dynamic issue more than an IC issue. The table is murderhoboing, your character has an issue with it, and the murderhobos have an issue with you taking issue with their murderhoboing.
The way I see it, you have two options. One with a low chance of success, one with a somewhat higher chance of success but which also may end up with you out of the game.
Option 1.) Your character pulls the group aside and makes a stand. Your character lays out his issues with the team and tells them that while he's grateful to them, that doesn't mean he's willing to become a monster in truth. Either the team shapes up or you'll take your leave. if the party responds with "okay thanx bai", then they have no complaint coming when your guy does exactly what he said he would and leaves. Roll a morally repugnant rogue and enjoy HoboQuest, if you're able to.
Option 2.) Tell the other players that you're not really vibing on the game so far. Your character isn't clicking with this group and you're not super keen on the dynamic so far, but you don't want to spike everybody's fun so you'd like to talk over possible fixes/solutions. Your fellow players may end up surprised by how hard their actions have hit you - a lot of folks get deep into their roleplaying and don't realize they're breaking the party until something snaps. A calm, constructive "how can we try and fix this so everybody wins?" chat outside of the game can work miracles...or it can get you excised from the group because everybody just wants to murderhobo their way through Generic Not-Faerun and someone who insists on bringing morals into their D&D game can hang. Up to you whether to take that risk or not, based on your read of the group.
One of the goblins I had managed to apprehend, and as the only one who spoke goblin, managed to convince him to lead us to the cave where the hobgoblin was planning to sacrifice the child, relaying the promise I had made to the group.
What was the promise? It's absolutely core to your post, but you never actually told us.
On the OOC side:
-The DM doesn't want any character death this early in the campaign, which I assume also applies to characters leaving the party.
This bridge is burned. I don't know exactly who burned it because I don't know what promise you made the goblin in-character, but the Warlock engaged in PVP when they killed "your" Goblin, just like they would have if they killed a baby mastiff you bought in a shop. You said the DM was fine with it, so we're past the point of the DM approving of PVP.
-No one in the party seems to see this as an evil act, because it was just a goblin.
Of course it was an evil act. The Warlock was mad at you for making a promise on their behalf (I can't tell if this belief was accurate, but that's not material here), and expressed that anger by murdering your oathsworn. That's definitionally evil.
So I'm trying to come up with some way to roleplay this. My character is basically neutral good, so I don't see betrayal as in him, but at the same time, I can't simple 'let it go' as this was clearly intended to hurt him on a deep and personal level.
Right, exactly. Although you sound LG, not NG.
From the perspective of my character, there would be no reason for him not to leave the party, as what they did was cruel and sadistic to him.
You have a debt to repay. If you want to lean into your LG tendencies, stay with the group to pay off your debt, but since the Warlock owes you a debt now, demand payment. I suggest the hand they used to fire the Eldritch Blast, and I suggest collecting it while the Warlock sleeps, if they refuse to pay up willingly.
If we get into the exact wording, it was something along the lines of 'we will heal you and let you go if you lead us to the cave'. Personally I would like to resolve the issue without breaking the game.
I think option 2 is probably the best way to go about this out of those options. I know that the 3 senior players have a dynamic already going, so technically I'm the one disrupting that. I just hope I don't get booted since I do want to have fun with the campaign.
I'm going to try and take this from my own perspective, and it's difficult for me to put myself in anyone else's shoes. Neutral good is someone who is basically fair and sometimes indifferent to the consequence of their actions. They will take laws that seem reasonable under advisement, they can follow them if they like. They really never have to follow the rules someone else wrote, but they know that breaking the rules leads to bad things. The also aren't Chaotic in any way, but that doesn't mean that they can't listen to good advice.
You promised the Goblin that if it helped you, it would be allowed to live, and you kept that promise. Someone else broke it. Since you're a Bugbear, it's perfectly reasonable to think someone is going to kill you and mutilate your corpse to play around with your bones.
Honestly, my advice is to recognize that your play style isn't a match for anyone else's, including the DM. Ask if you can play a different character, one who will clearly need to be Evil, or find a game elsewhere, because you're not going to have any fun with that group.
They will take laws that seem reasonable under advisement, they can follow them if they like. They really never have to follow the rules someone else wrote, but they know that breaking the rules leads to bad things. The also aren't Chaotic in any way, but that doesn't mean that they can't listen to good advice.
I understand this, but the way this played out, there was no advise, he made a promise, no one objected to it, they simply allowed the goblin to lead them, knowing what my promise was, then murdered him in front of him, going through him to do it. If someone had spoken up before hand, I could have gone this route, but that's not the case.
Since you're a Bugbear, it's perfectly reasonable to think someone is going to kill you and mutilate your corpse to play around with your bones.
I suppose that is true, though it gives him even less reason to hang around with this group, as they don't see his word as of any worth and have no issue hurting him. He may well be next in line to be killed and dissected.
Honestly I don't want to leave the group after 2 session if I can help it. But it is clear that this needs to be hammered out OOC, since there seems to be no IC options to resolve this.
"I suppose that is true, though it gives him even less reason to hang around with this group, as they don't see his word as of any worth and have no issue hurting him. He may well be next in line to be killed and dissected."
If you want to be just dreadfully technical, the sworn word of a Neutral Good character isn't worth much. Their alignment puts them under no obligations at all. That's Lawful Good, and Quindraco pointed that out.
You'll have to decide for yourself who has the right and wrong of it. I see you as being in the right, but everyone else is just playing their characters the way they enjoyed, so it's not someone I can judge. I'm only Neutral Good myself.
The way I saw it, a neutral good character is just trying to do good, and will use law or chaos to achieve that. My character generally would keep his word because it's good to keep your word, but would break it if that would be of more good to do so. The goblin was a weak creature, obviously intent of fleeing, and was a one hit kill. There was no benefit or good from breaking his word at that point. If the goblin had started screaming an alarm, or attacked, that would be different.
However, this gives me some idea of how to work around the issue. If I'm thinking of this too much from a LG position rather then NG, there's some wiggle room there to work with, so that's helpful in turning this from a soul crushing action to something my character can possibly accept and move on from. The bigger issue is how to deal with the trust fallout, since there is nothing binding the group other then this one immediate mission. How can my character continue on with them without any trust?
It seems you joined a game without being aware of the general vibe. It happens, especially when joining after the game has already started (session zero FTW, can't say it enough). If I were you, I'd first decide if I'm on board with that vibe or not - if not, it's probably better for all concerned that you take your leave, no hard feelings, to each their own but it's just not your cup of tea. If on the other hand you're fine with that kind of party and it's just that your character doesn't fit in, simply tell the group that. I assume most DMs would let you do a retcon or remove that character and create a more suitable one. You can keep the character and just deal with whatever happens too, but I wouldn't advise it; I expect it'll just lead to metagaming and people getting annoyed with each other and a lot of things that don't make sense getting handwaived in order to keep the game going.
tl;dr: either commit to the game as it is and play a character that fits in or don't play. Anything else will probably just be miserable.
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A lot of that makes perfect sense. I had told the DM about my character, and that I was looking for roleplay, but he did say he was adapting this to what the players wanted. I think I just felt blindsided when another character betrayed mine starting right out. I mean, it would make sense after the party is established and there a uniting goal that keeps us together, but being betrayed right off the bat is hard to deal with when there is no reason for the party to stay together at all.
If we get into the exact wording, it was something along the lines of 'we will heal you and let you go if you lead us to the cave'. Personally I would like to resolve the issue without breaking the game.
Ok, so you absolutely did represent yourself as an agent of the group. If you didn't actually discuss that beforehand with said group, it makes sense for the Warlock to get salty.
What breaks the game is when players stop roleplaying. In-game actions should have in-game consequences, or there's no point to any of it. The Warlock committed actual murder as part of throwing a temper tantrum over what you did, because the Warlock viewed the sophont in question as a thing rather than a person. You can take it to the bank the Warlock thinks the same of you, since you and it were/are both Goblinoids. Have your character react accordingly.
The question then becomes what is appropriate as a response. Thanks to previous posts, I think I can work around my character being personally offended but not devastated to the point of being mentally broken by it. I don't see chopping off the warlocks hand in his sleep as a great action since it will likely result in my character being killed off, since none of the party saw a problem with what he did, it would give the impression they all think as he does. He's outnumbered by people who see him as 'just another goblinoid', and obviously would rather not die.
I think option 2 is probably the best way to go about this out of those options. I know that the 3 senior players have a dynamic already going, so technically I'm the one disrupting that. I just hope I don't get booted since I do want to have fun with the campaign.
Honestly though, are you having fun with the campaign? It doesn't really sound like it so far.
I know you just got back into the game and might be worried about finding a new group if you leave this one, but the forums here are posting new games all the time -- and that's just DDB. If this group's style of play doesn't suit you, you will find one that does if you keep looking.
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Active characters:
Carric Aquissar, elven wannabe artist in his deconstructionist period (Archfey warlock) Lan Kidogo, mapach archaeologist and treasure hunter (Knowledge cleric) Mardan Ferres, elven private investigator obsessed with that one unsolved murder (Assassin rogue) Xhekhetiel, halfling survivor of a Betrayer Gods cult (Runechild sorcerer/fighter)
I mean, we just started and we're just getting into it, but this came out of the blue and blind sided me. It's too early to say whether the game is good or not. If it doesn't work out, I wouldn't mind going online if that's the only other option, I've just never done it online so I'm not familiar with how that's done, or how to get in.
The question then becomes what is appropriate as a response. Thanks to previous posts, I think I can work around my character being personally offended but not devastated to the point of being mentally broken by it. I don't see chopping off the warlocks hand in his sleep as a great action since it will likely result in my character being killed off, since none of the party saw a problem with what he did, it would give the impression they all think as he does. He's outnumbered by people who see him as 'just another goblinoid', and obviously would rather not die.
Well, start off socially. Confront him about how racist he is against Goblinoids and demand justice, and take it from there. One thing you can certainly do is declare his part of the debt paid in full, and then refuse to help him with anything under any circumstance.
It sounds to me as if this group enjoy the combat and are wanting to think about the roleplay much. Why did they resucue a bugbear from bandits with the attitude they have to goblinoids,either they would have left you with the bandits and done nothing or killed you along wth the bandits.
I can understand a world where gablinoids are all (or at least nearly all) untrustworthy and evil and it is OK to kill a goblin because it is "just a goblin" but such a world is not "fine with monsterous races". To play a bugbear in such a world everyone else in the party would have to either be monsterous or sympathetic to monsterous races and be appalled by the way society treats them. (Normally in such a world you just wouldn't be alowed to play them)
It seems as if the rest of the party don't want restriction of races but want to stick to the old world view that goblinoids are evil and if you kill one you are doing a good thing, and that just doesn't make sense. If a monsterous race will be killed by a human/elf/dwalf the first chance they get then the two races are going to keep very much apart.
First you need to decide if you would enjoy playing in such a game with that party as another character, explain that you don't think it is compatable to play a bugbear with a party that kills goblinoids and regards it as a good thing. This is one of the rare cases where "what my character would do is run away from the group in fear of his life" is reasonable. I know the DM said he doesn't want party members killed off but if he is concerned about delaying the main story line to have your new character join the party you could suggest just ret-conning it so that the party had rescued your new character from the bandits.
I you would not enjoy playing such a game style then just inform them that thier play style is incompatable with what you want from the game and look for another group.
You say you're Bugbear, but I didn't notice the class. I am assuming you're a fighting type, and to me, the RP would consist of grabbing the slender Warlock and pulling him close. "If you ever break a promise I make again, I will eat your heart while you watch. If you have a problem with me making a promise, say it at the time. You ever undercut my word again and one of us will die!"
Again, an OC discussion is best to ensure everyone is on board with a certain style of play,. I would point out that your character WILL (or perhaps WOULD) attack someone for betraying him/her. The goblin's fate isn't relevant at this stage, this was a party member who deliberately broke your promise, with NO warning that he would do so. If it had been my character, a PK would have occurred there, either my character or the Warlock. i tend to play characters with strong convictions and standards they adhere to firmly. Someone spitting on them and intentionally making a liar of them would, most certainly, result in a fight, likely to the death.
Following the OC discussion, you will need to determine if you (and your character) can abide running around with a group of murderhobos or if he has some sense of morality that will constantly grate on your nerves. Myself, I couldn't do it. I have no respect for folks who play a campaign like that as to me, it lacks depth of character and tells me they should play a video game and not a TTRPG. For the record, I have been in a group where one person wanted to be the murderhobo and played it well, always wanting to kill everyone. He was also a good RP-er and as such, we managed to deter him on most occasions. He killed a few folks, when "investigating" on his own, which created some minor in party strife (OC we all had a laugh at how it played out) but overall, tempering his murderous urges was fun for both him and us.
As a DM, I told a murderhobo who killed everyone on a couple of occasions that the NPC would have offered valuable info. Said murdering despot found himself in a trapped room (door locked behind him) facing 2 Vampires. His new character wasn't quite so bloodthirsty, although he was still quite violent, lol.
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Talk to your Players.Talk to your DM. If more people used this advice, there would be 24.74% fewer threads on Tactics, Rules and DM discussions.
If you are having fun, and you, as the player, are ok with the murderhoboing, then I say carry on. Maybe you can lean in on the RP slightly of the warlock doing what they did. I think it’s perfectly fine for there to be some character tension in the party, as long as it doesn’t become personal. (Think Gimli and Legolas in the LotR movies. They weren’t best friends right off).
Plus, from an IC perspective, do you think there would be immediate trust between murderous adventurers and some guy they freed from captivity? Trust needs to be earned IC, as long as OOC players are not treating each other poorly. If so, leave the group fast. Just be careful if you want to play off the tension and betrayal, that the other players are aware what you are doing. It can be a fine line between players having fun RPing the tension and one player taking it too far and the other getting pissed.
I recently began playing DnD after a 10 year lapse, wanting to get back in the game with a more roleplay based format, and joined an open seat group with a new DM who made a custom world, and wants to allow the party to do as they want and adapt the game to make it fun for everyone. My character joined maybe a couple of sessions after the campaign started and was introduced as the party saving him from bandits. There is no overarching quest, but I played it as my character is sticking with the party to repay the debt for helping him. In the second session, we go on our first mission together, and end up saving a wagon from goblins, though their hobgoblin leader made off with a child, however, immediately the party had been discussing how to extort the caravan in character just before the attack, and afterwards, begin mutilating the corpses to collect the bones (on character being a reborn skeleton that collects them) as my character looks visibly uncomfortable (him being a bugbear). One of the goblins I had managed to apprehend, and as the only one who spoke goblin, managed to convince him to lead us to the cave where the hobgoblin was planning to sacrifice the child in return for letting him live, relaying the promise I had made to the group. After we had gotten to the cave and took out the guard, I went to let the goblin go, and the warlock of the group fired off an eldrich blast to kill the goblin, which my character, wanting to keep his word, took to prevent the goblin being killed. However, he was unable to stop the second blast that instantly destroyed the goblin, and the reborn character immediately picked through to collect the bones, while the Warlock character then told mine, 'Never make a promise for me again'. None of the other characters backed up my character, and in fact everyone seemed perfectly fine with what happened, including the DM, who told me 'goblins are known for being untrustworthy'. Now he had established that the world we were in was fine with monstrous races, so a bugbear and a walking skeleton was no big deal walking into town. So now I'm in a conundrum on how to roleplay this.
On the IC side of things:
-My character just had a person he made a promise to brutally murdered and dissected in front of him.
-He is a bugbear, which travels in the same circles as goblins, and which we know as the goblin told us there were bugbears in the cave with the hobgoblin.
-There is no uniting goal of the party, this is literally a job boards quest.
On the OOC side:
-The DM doesn't want any character death this early in the campaign, which I assume also applies to characters leaving the party.
-No one in the party seems to see this as an evil act, because it was just a goblin.
So I'm trying to come up with some way to roleplay this. My character is basically neutral good, so I don't see betrayal as in him, but at the same time, I can't simple 'let it go' as this was clearly intended to hurt him on a deep and personal level. From the perspective of my character, there would be no reason for him not to leave the party, as what they did was cruel and sadistic to him. At the same time, he can't due due to the OOC restriction of not losing characters early game. I have been trying to contact the DM to discuss options, but I haven't got a reply yet, so I'm looking for advice, as the more I go over this, it seems like there no way for me to roleplay the character without breaking continuity, or results in character death or desertion. I don't want to be the person who drags the rest of the parties fun down and forces them to play the way I want, but I don't want to sacrifice my character so that the other character can feel superior in breaking his spirit. Does anyone have any advise or experience in a situation like this. Again, I'm trying to talk to the DM, but I'm looking for options in the mean time.
This sounds like a table dynamic issue more than an IC issue. The table is murderhoboing, your character has an issue with it, and the murderhobos have an issue with you taking issue with their murderhoboing.
The way I see it, you have two options. One with a low chance of success, one with a somewhat higher chance of success but which also may end up with you out of the game.
Option 1.) Your character pulls the group aside and makes a stand. Your character lays out his issues with the team and tells them that while he's grateful to them, that doesn't mean he's willing to become a monster in truth. Either the team shapes up or you'll take your leave. if the party responds with "okay thanx bai", then they have no complaint coming when your guy does exactly what he said he would and leaves. Roll a morally repugnant rogue and enjoy HoboQuest, if you're able to.
Option 2.) Tell the other players that you're not really vibing on the game so far. Your character isn't clicking with this group and you're not super keen on the dynamic so far, but you don't want to spike everybody's fun so you'd like to talk over possible fixes/solutions. Your fellow players may end up surprised by how hard their actions have hit you - a lot of folks get deep into their roleplaying and don't realize they're breaking the party until something snaps. A calm, constructive "how can we try and fix this so everybody wins?" chat outside of the game can work miracles...or it can get you excised from the group because everybody just wants to murderhobo their way through Generic Not-Faerun and someone who insists on bringing morals into their D&D game can hang. Up to you whether to take that risk or not, based on your read of the group.
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What was the promise? It's absolutely core to your post, but you never actually told us.
This bridge is burned. I don't know exactly who burned it because I don't know what promise you made the goblin in-character, but the Warlock engaged in PVP when they killed "your" Goblin, just like they would have if they killed a baby mastiff you bought in a shop. You said the DM was fine with it, so we're past the point of the DM approving of PVP.
Of course it was an evil act. The Warlock was mad at you for making a promise on their behalf (I can't tell if this belief was accurate, but that's not material here), and expressed that anger by murdering your oathsworn. That's definitionally evil.
Right, exactly. Although you sound LG, not NG.
You have a debt to repay. If you want to lean into your LG tendencies, stay with the group to pay off your debt, but since the Warlock owes you a debt now, demand payment. I suggest the hand they used to fire the Eldritch Blast, and I suggest collecting it while the Warlock sleeps, if they refuse to pay up willingly.
If we get into the exact wording, it was something along the lines of 'we will heal you and let you go if you lead us to the cave'. Personally I would like to resolve the issue without breaking the game.
I think option 2 is probably the best way to go about this out of those options. I know that the 3 senior players have a dynamic already going, so technically I'm the one disrupting that. I just hope I don't get booted since I do want to have fun with the campaign.
I'm going to try and take this from my own perspective, and it's difficult for me to put myself in anyone else's shoes. Neutral good is someone who is basically fair and sometimes indifferent to the consequence of their actions. They will take laws that seem reasonable under advisement, they can follow them if they like. They really never have to follow the rules someone else wrote, but they know that breaking the rules leads to bad things. The also aren't Chaotic in any way, but that doesn't mean that they can't listen to good advice.
You promised the Goblin that if it helped you, it would be allowed to live, and you kept that promise. Someone else broke it. Since you're a Bugbear, it's perfectly reasonable to think someone is going to kill you and mutilate your corpse to play around with your bones.
Honestly, my advice is to recognize that your play style isn't a match for anyone else's, including the DM. Ask if you can play a different character, one who will clearly need to be Evil, or find a game elsewhere, because you're not going to have any fun with that group.
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I understand this, but the way this played out, there was no advise, he made a promise, no one objected to it, they simply allowed the goblin to lead them, knowing what my promise was, then murdered him in front of him, going through him to do it. If someone had spoken up before hand, I could have gone this route, but that's not the case.
I suppose that is true, though it gives him even less reason to hang around with this group, as they don't see his word as of any worth and have no issue hurting him. He may well be next in line to be killed and dissected.
Honestly I don't want to leave the group after 2 session if I can help it. But it is clear that this needs to be hammered out OOC, since there seems to be no IC options to resolve this.
"I suppose that is true, though it gives him even less reason to hang around with this group, as they don't see his word as of any worth and have no issue hurting him. He may well be next in line to be killed and dissected."
If you want to be just dreadfully technical, the sworn word of a Neutral Good character isn't worth much. Their alignment puts them under no obligations at all. That's Lawful Good, and Quindraco pointed that out.
You'll have to decide for yourself who has the right and wrong of it. I see you as being in the right, but everyone else is just playing their characters the way they enjoyed, so it's not someone I can judge. I'm only Neutral Good myself.
<Insert clever signature here>
The way I saw it, a neutral good character is just trying to do good, and will use law or chaos to achieve that. My character generally would keep his word because it's good to keep your word, but would break it if that would be of more good to do so. The goblin was a weak creature, obviously intent of fleeing, and was a one hit kill. There was no benefit or good from breaking his word at that point. If the goblin had started screaming an alarm, or attacked, that would be different.
However, this gives me some idea of how to work around the issue. If I'm thinking of this too much from a LG position rather then NG, there's some wiggle room there to work with, so that's helpful in turning this from a soul crushing action to something my character can possibly accept and move on from. The bigger issue is how to deal with the trust fallout, since there is nothing binding the group other then this one immediate mission. How can my character continue on with them without any trust?
It seems you joined a game without being aware of the general vibe. It happens, especially when joining after the game has already started (session zero FTW, can't say it enough). If I were you, I'd first decide if I'm on board with that vibe or not - if not, it's probably better for all concerned that you take your leave, no hard feelings, to each their own but it's just not your cup of tea. If on the other hand you're fine with that kind of party and it's just that your character doesn't fit in, simply tell the group that. I assume most DMs would let you do a retcon or remove that character and create a more suitable one. You can keep the character and just deal with whatever happens too, but I wouldn't advise it; I expect it'll just lead to metagaming and people getting annoyed with each other and a lot of things that don't make sense getting handwaived in order to keep the game going.
tl;dr: either commit to the game as it is and play a character that fits in or don't play. Anything else will probably just be miserable.
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A lot of that makes perfect sense. I had told the DM about my character, and that I was looking for roleplay, but he did say he was adapting this to what the players wanted. I think I just felt blindsided when another character betrayed mine starting right out. I mean, it would make sense after the party is established and there a uniting goal that keeps us together, but being betrayed right off the bat is hard to deal with when there is no reason for the party to stay together at all.
Ok, so you absolutely did represent yourself as an agent of the group. If you didn't actually discuss that beforehand with said group, it makes sense for the Warlock to get salty.
What breaks the game is when players stop roleplaying. In-game actions should have in-game consequences, or there's no point to any of it. The Warlock committed actual murder as part of throwing a temper tantrum over what you did, because the Warlock viewed the sophont in question as a thing rather than a person. You can take it to the bank the Warlock thinks the same of you, since you and it were/are both Goblinoids. Have your character react accordingly.
The question then becomes what is appropriate as a response. Thanks to previous posts, I think I can work around my character being personally offended but not devastated to the point of being mentally broken by it. I don't see chopping off the warlocks hand in his sleep as a great action since it will likely result in my character being killed off, since none of the party saw a problem with what he did, it would give the impression they all think as he does. He's outnumbered by people who see him as 'just another goblinoid', and obviously would rather not die.
Honestly though, are you having fun with the campaign? It doesn't really sound like it so far.
I know you just got back into the game and might be worried about finding a new group if you leave this one, but the forums here are posting new games all the time -- and that's just DDB. If this group's style of play doesn't suit you, you will find one that does if you keep looking.
Active characters:
Carric Aquissar, elven wannabe artist in his deconstructionist period (Archfey warlock)
Lan Kidogo, mapach archaeologist and treasure hunter (Knowledge cleric)
Mardan Ferres, elven private investigator obsessed with that one unsolved murder (Assassin rogue)
Xhekhetiel, halfling survivor of a Betrayer Gods cult (Runechild sorcerer/fighter)
I mean, we just started and we're just getting into it, but this came out of the blue and blind sided me. It's too early to say whether the game is good or not. If it doesn't work out, I wouldn't mind going online if that's the only other option, I've just never done it online so I'm not familiar with how that's done, or how to get in.
Well, start off socially. Confront him about how racist he is against Goblinoids and demand justice, and take it from there. One thing you can certainly do is declare his part of the debt paid in full, and then refuse to help him with anything under any circumstance.
That's a good idea. I may have to go that angle.
It sounds to me as if this group enjoy the combat and are wanting to think about the roleplay much. Why did they resucue a bugbear from bandits with the attitude they have to goblinoids,either they would have left you with the bandits and done nothing or killed you along wth the bandits.
I can understand a world where gablinoids are all (or at least nearly all) untrustworthy and evil and it is OK to kill a goblin because it is "just a goblin" but such a world is not "fine with monsterous races". To play a bugbear in such a world everyone else in the party would have to either be monsterous or sympathetic to monsterous races and be appalled by the way society treats them. (Normally in such a world you just wouldn't be alowed to play them)
It seems as if the rest of the party don't want restriction of races but want to stick to the old world view that goblinoids are evil and if you kill one you are doing a good thing, and that just doesn't make sense. If a monsterous race will be killed by a human/elf/dwalf the first chance they get then the two races are going to keep very much apart.
First you need to decide if you would enjoy playing in such a game with that party as another character, explain that you don't think it is compatable to play a bugbear with a party that kills goblinoids and regards it as a good thing. This is one of the rare cases where "what my character would do is run away from the group in fear of his life" is reasonable. I know the DM said he doesn't want party members killed off but if he is concerned about delaying the main story line to have your new character join the party you could suggest just ret-conning it so that the party had rescued your new character from the bandits.
I you would not enjoy playing such a game style then just inform them that thier play style is incompatable with what you want from the game and look for another group.
You say you're Bugbear, but I didn't notice the class. I am assuming you're a fighting type, and to me, the RP would consist of grabbing the slender Warlock and pulling him close. "If you ever break a promise I make again, I will eat your heart while you watch. If you have a problem with me making a promise, say it at the time. You ever undercut my word again and one of us will die!"
Again, an OC discussion is best to ensure everyone is on board with a certain style of play,. I would point out that your character WILL (or perhaps WOULD) attack someone for betraying him/her. The goblin's fate isn't relevant at this stage, this was a party member who deliberately broke your promise, with NO warning that he would do so. If it had been my character, a PK would have occurred there, either my character or the Warlock. i tend to play characters with strong convictions and standards they adhere to firmly. Someone spitting on them and intentionally making a liar of them would, most certainly, result in a fight, likely to the death.
Following the OC discussion, you will need to determine if you (and your character) can abide running around with a group of murderhobos or if he has some sense of morality that will constantly grate on your nerves. Myself, I couldn't do it. I have no respect for folks who play a campaign like that as to me, it lacks depth of character and tells me they should play a video game and not a TTRPG. For the record, I have been in a group where one person wanted to be the murderhobo and played it well, always wanting to kill everyone. He was also a good RP-er and as such, we managed to deter him on most occasions. He killed a few folks, when "investigating" on his own, which created some minor in party strife (OC we all had a laugh at how it played out) but overall, tempering his murderous urges was fun for both him and us.
As a DM, I told a murderhobo who killed everyone on a couple of occasions that the NPC would have offered valuable info. Said murdering despot found himself in a trapped room (door locked behind him) facing 2 Vampires. His new character wasn't quite so bloodthirsty, although he was still quite violent, lol.
Talk to your Players. Talk to your DM. If more people used this advice, there would be 24.74% fewer threads on Tactics, Rules and DM discussions.
If you are having fun, and you, as the player, are ok with the murderhoboing, then I say carry on. Maybe you can lean in on the RP slightly of the warlock doing what they did. I think it’s perfectly fine for there to be some character tension in the party, as long as it doesn’t become personal. (Think Gimli and Legolas in the LotR movies. They weren’t best friends right off).
Plus, from an IC perspective, do you think there would be immediate trust between murderous adventurers and some guy they freed from captivity? Trust needs to be earned IC, as long as OOC players are not treating each other poorly. If so, leave the group fast. Just be careful if you want to play off the tension and betrayal, that the other players are aware what you are doing. It can be a fine line between players having fun RPing the tension and one player taking it too far and the other getting pissed.
EZD6 by DM Scotty
https://www.drivethrurpg.com/en/product/397599/EZD6-Core-Rulebook?