Been thinking about playing this amazing looking game for so so long now, but keep letting my anxieties get in the way of taking the plunge. What is the best advice you can tell a new player so they don't look foolish in front of this player base? I'm familiar with RPGs and the way they're played, at least in a video game standpoint, and have some familiarity with the DnD lingo and jargon, mostly from my time with Baldur's Gate 3. I know it's not an exact 1-to-1 replica of the tabletop game, but I think it's a start? I don't know, I guess I'm just looking for some motivation/peace of mind from the community. Thanks y'all, appreciate you and dealing with me being a wuss. lol
(Also just created my first character, so I guess looking for groups that would welcome someone for their first experience!)
Absolutely brand new to D&D and am super excited to learn and play. I’m a big nerd at heart, love roleplay and goofy or badass ideas, and I’m here to roll dice, make mistakes, and have fun with the party. Recently sober, expanding my interests and hobbies, exploring things I've wanted to for years. Really looking forward to sharing experiences and ultimately making new friends.
If you have an anxiety, about feeling foolish, nothing anyone can say can really help. You just need to reach down inside yourself find the intestinal fortitude and just do it. The group around you can do what they can, be non judgmental etc. But your anxiety is probably internal, and no matter what others say, that worry about being foolishness is what you think, not what others perceive.
Talk with the person who will be a DM, let them know your anxiety with basically speaking with others. If they are understanding, they can let you do the minimum of role playing and just do the maximum of the mechanical type stuff (dice rolls & positioning& choice of weapons). As you play with the group, you should start to feel more comfortable (could be a lot of sessions) and then baby step into role playing i.e. being more descriptive with your language and physical motions.
Honestly, if you do something foolish, what is the consequence? Once you can answer that there is no consequence, it becomes easier to roleplay.
I don't think the actual role play part is what's bothering me, but rather holding up the pace of play due to my lack of experience. I know that the only way to learn it is to do it, I just don't want to be "that guy" lol. Thanks for the response
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Absolutely brand new to D&D and am super excited to learn and play. I’m a big nerd at heart, love roleplay and goofy or badass ideas, and I’m here to roll dice, make mistakes, and have fun with the party. Recently sober, expanding my interests and hobbies, exploring things I've wanted to for years. Really looking forward to sharing experiences and ultimately making new friends.
I don't think the actual role play part is what's bothering me, but rather holding up the pace of play due to my lack of experience. I know that the only way to learn it is to do it, I just don't want to be "that guy" lol. Thanks for the response
Hopefully you are playing with a group of good people, whether they are experienced or not. Everyone was new at this once, and most of the people who play this game for any length of time tend to remember that. :)
You can ask your DM to cook up a small one-on-one session so you don't feel like you're holding other players back. I like to do that for people at my table who are brand new to the game so they can get a feel for it.
Also, it's normal to be sort of awkward for the first few sessions. Even as a veteran player, it usually takes a while to get warmed up to a brand new character.
I think a bit of anxiety is also a perfectly normal thing to experience. When I'm playing a game with strangers for the first time, even if I'm not GMing I still feel a bit anxious. It always goes away as soon as we start playing. I hope yours does, too!
I think that DND has some of the best and kindest people you will find. Anyone who knows you are new will bring you along. Consider joining games that start at Level 1, it's much slower and easier to get into the game when it's simple.
If you have specific questions, feel free to DM me.
Cheers!
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Breathe, dragons; sing of the First World, forged out of chaos and painted with beauty. Sing of Bahamut, the Platinum, molding the shape of the mountains and rivers; Sing too of Chromatic Tiamat, painting all over the infinite canvas. Partnered, they woke in the darkness; partnered, they labored in acts of creation.
Ask your friend who invited you to see how much the DM likes Role-playing in their campaign, though even then most are accepting of nervous/quiet players even if some may still try to get you to participate more frequently.
I don't think the actual role play part is what's bothering me, but rather holding up the pace of play due to my lack of experience. I know that the only way to learn it is to do it, I just don't want to be "that guy" lol. Thanks for the response
I've played with a lot of the same people for 5 years and one of them after all that time still doesn't understand the difference between an action and a bonus action (he's playing a Fighter so literally the easiest class) so even if you are the one holding up the pace of play you definitely won't be the only one. Even after years of play a Wizard player will almost always take longer than a melee class because they have more options, experience isn't always a factor, and the rest of us just accept that so try not to let it worry you
When you look for a group, just mention that you’re new. Some tables are more welcoming to that than others. (But really, if they give you a hard time for being new, it’s probably not a group you want to play with anyway.)
Dont get too attached to the character you made. Many (most? Almost all?) tables have house rules, and some of these house rules have to do with character creation. A DM might ban a certain species, for example. So be prepared to make adjustments to your character.
As for finding a group, I’d say try to find one in person. Playing online can be good, and depending on where you live it might be the only option. But if you can do in person, it’s really a better experience. I’d suggest asking at local game or comic shops about it — some of them have open game nights, or looking for group boards. In some places meetup has a robust presence for people looking to play all kinds of games, so you might also check there.
Have you tried watching actual plays online? For me, that helped a lot in learning the basics enough to feel confident in my ability to play. Any other questions you have should be easily answered and understood in the right group… unless they are new like you are, in which case you will not be alone and shouldn’t have to worry so much about it! :)
I don't think the actual role play part is what's bothering me, but rather holding up the pace of play due to my lack of experience. I know that the only way to learn it is to do it, I just don't want to be "that guy" lol. Thanks for the response
I'm going to give you the same advice I give to all newcomers to the game at my table.
"So long as you know what you want your character to attempt to do when their turn comes up you are doing great. Don't worry about the rules, focus on sharing the intent."
That lets me and other experienced players quickly teach rules as they are relevant to you. Instead of learning everything all at once you simply learn as you do. So if you have your character cast a spell we can walk through that in no time.
It's having no plan at all when it's your turn that's sometimes difficult. Many veteran players struggle with that too so you are in great company.
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Hey all,
Been thinking about playing this amazing looking game for so so long now, but keep letting my anxieties get in the way of taking the plunge. What is the best advice you can tell a new player so they don't look foolish in front of this player base? I'm familiar with RPGs and the way they're played, at least in a video game standpoint, and have some familiarity with the DnD lingo and jargon, mostly from my time with Baldur's Gate 3. I know it's not an exact 1-to-1 replica of the tabletop game, but I think it's a start? I don't know, I guess I'm just looking for some motivation/peace of mind from the community. Thanks y'all, appreciate you and dealing with me being a wuss. lol
(Also just created my first character, so I guess looking for groups that would welcome someone for their first experience!)
Cheers,
Gooch
Absolutely brand new to D&D and am super excited to learn and play. I’m a big nerd at heart, love roleplay and goofy or badass ideas, and I’m here to roll dice, make mistakes, and have fun with the party. Recently sober, expanding my interests and hobbies, exploring things I've wanted to for years. Really looking forward to sharing experiences and ultimately making new friends.
If you have an anxiety, about feeling foolish, nothing anyone can say can really help. You just need to reach down inside yourself find the intestinal fortitude and just do it. The group around you can do what they can, be non judgmental etc. But your anxiety is probably internal, and no matter what others say, that worry about being foolishness is what you think, not what others perceive.
Talk with the person who will be a DM, let them know your anxiety with basically speaking with others. If they are understanding, they can let you do the minimum of role playing and just do the maximum of the mechanical type stuff (dice rolls & positioning& choice of weapons). As you play with the group, you should start to feel more comfortable (could be a lot of sessions) and then baby step into role playing i.e. being more descriptive with your language and physical motions.
Honestly, if you do something foolish, what is the consequence? Once you can answer that there is no consequence, it becomes easier to roleplay.
I don't think the actual role play part is what's bothering me, but rather holding up the pace of play due to my lack of experience. I know that the only way to learn it is to do it, I just don't want to be "that guy" lol. Thanks for the response
Absolutely brand new to D&D and am super excited to learn and play. I’m a big nerd at heart, love roleplay and goofy or badass ideas, and I’m here to roll dice, make mistakes, and have fun with the party. Recently sober, expanding my interests and hobbies, exploring things I've wanted to for years. Really looking forward to sharing experiences and ultimately making new friends.
Hopefully you are playing with a group of good people, whether they are experienced or not. Everyone was new at this once, and most of the people who play this game for any length of time tend to remember that. :)
Good fortune to you!
You can ask your DM to cook up a small one-on-one session so you don't feel like you're holding other players back. I like to do that for people at my table who are brand new to the game so they can get a feel for it.
Also, it's normal to be sort of awkward for the first few sessions. Even as a veteran player, it usually takes a while to get warmed up to a brand new character.
I think a bit of anxiety is also a perfectly normal thing to experience. When I'm playing a game with strangers for the first time, even if I'm not GMing I still feel a bit anxious. It always goes away as soon as we start playing. I hope yours does, too!
I have Darkvision, by the way.
I think that DND has some of the best and kindest people you will find. Anyone who knows you are new will bring you along. Consider joining games that start at Level 1, it's much slower and easier to get into the game when it's simple.
Greetings Gooch,
Welcome to the Forums!
Anxiety is very personal, and how it affects each of us is different.
The advice above is good, and as stated most people are very friendly and helpful :)
Taking the first step and joining DDB as well as creating a first character is a great first step.
There is a LOT of free info on this site like the ones outlined on this post here:
https://www.dndbeyond.com/forums/d-d-beyond-general/general-discussion/187017-a-small-list-of-hidden-free-d-d-beyond-stuff
If you have specific questions, feel free to DM me.
Cheers!
Breathe, dragons; sing of the First World, forged out of chaos and painted with beauty.
Sing of Bahamut, the Platinum, molding the shape of the mountains and rivers;
Sing too of Chromatic Tiamat, painting all over the infinite canvas.
Partnered, they woke in the darkness; partnered, they labored in acts of creation.
Ask your friend who invited you to see how much the DM likes Role-playing in their campaign, though even then most are accepting of nervous/quiet players even if some may still try to get you to participate more frequently.
The main things to keep in mind are https://xender.vip/
Shower before showing up, especially during the summer comic store owners hate participants who come in smelly and sweaty.
DON'T argue with the DM, it's alright to ask question and possibly try to hash things out but keep in mind DM IS ABSOLUTE.
I've played with a lot of the same people for 5 years and one of them after all that time still doesn't understand the difference between an action and a bonus action (he's playing a Fighter so literally the easiest class) so even if you are the one holding up the pace of play you definitely won't be the only one. Even after years of play a Wizard player will almost always take longer than a melee class because they have more options, experience isn't always a factor, and the rest of us just accept that so try not to let it worry you
When you look for a group, just mention that you’re new. Some tables are more welcoming to that than others. (But really, if they give you a hard time for being new, it’s probably not a group you want to play with anyway.)
Dont get too attached to the character you made. Many (most? Almost all?) tables have house rules, and some of these house rules have to do with character creation. A DM might ban a certain species, for example. So be prepared to make adjustments to your character.
As for finding a group, I’d say try to find one in person. Playing online can be good, and depending on where you live it might be the only option. But if you can do in person, it’s really a better experience. I’d suggest asking at local game or comic shops about it — some of them have open game nights, or looking for group boards. In some places meetup has a robust presence for people looking to play all kinds of games, so you might also check there.
Have you tried watching actual plays online? For me, that helped a lot in learning the basics enough to feel confident in my ability to play. Any other questions you have should be easily answered and understood in the right group… unless they are new like you are, in which case you will not be alone and shouldn’t have to worry so much about it! :)
I'm going to give you the same advice I give to all newcomers to the game at my table.
"So long as you know what you want your character to attempt to do when their turn comes up you are doing great. Don't worry about the rules, focus on sharing the intent."
That lets me and other experienced players quickly teach rules as they are relevant to you. Instead of learning everything all at once you simply learn as you do. So if you have your character cast a spell we can walk through that in no time.
It's having no plan at all when it's your turn that's sometimes difficult. Many veteran players struggle with that too so you are in great company.