Hey yall I may have a problem player, I have a DM in my game that I am running I am a new DM the thing is the player is having a hard time stopping being a DM. And I dont know how to deal with this as I am new to this, And also this player is my DM for me so yeah it can make things awkward in the other games this goes wrong. What is worse is they asked me to be their DM because the last DM stopped playing D&D at all I don't know what happened but I think I can see what may have started it. I do enjoy being a DM what brought this to a head was when I asked about an idea I had for a home brewed world and I told them that this would be in the future like 6 months or more, And I want to know how they liked the sound of it before I started building it while the other player like idea the player who is also a DM started telling me yeah they liked it and then proceeded to tell how to build my world and what I had to do, And when I had told them yes I new all that and that's why it would be at least 6 months away they kept going on and on. So my question is how do I get a DM to stop DM'ing and just be a PC. P.S if this question has been asked before sorry I could not find it in the forums
I'm a DM... And I play in a game DM'ed by someone who is also a player at my campaign. He has never DM'ed before. We have vastly different DM-styles where I'm more "free" and he rolls for tons of stuff that I think is just a waste of time. In our situation I notice that it isn't per se bad will. We know what we'd like to see from a player. In turn we try to "help" and make things easier for each other by playing our characters well. And doing rolls for the DM and such. Some behavior just happens. And we do try to tone it down since... well you don't want to overshadow/take the fun away from the DM. It can be really difficult to turn off being a DM when it comes to knowing more rules then most of the others at the table.
I suggest to just take that person aside and have a 1-on-1 conversation. Say that you can understand its probably coming from a good place of wanting to help. But you find it annoying and want him/her to tone it down. If you have question you know that person will be there and you will ask if there is anything you need. Untill then he should "please" tone it down.
The other DM sounds really enthused by your ideas : this is a good thing! Mostly.
I don't know what I would do*, but you should tell him that you are making this world as a thank you for all the hard work he has put in on his own campaign, and that although you value his input immensely, you feel it cheapens the gift to him if he has to help on his own present.
If he is as shallow as me, that should work!
*I have all the solutions to other people's problems, and none for my own. /sadface.
I have just started playing in a campaign run by one of the players in my campaign. Ah, the lack of stress, the chance to just turn up, only needing to remember 1 set of spells (actually, I am playing a warrior!) If he wants any help, he can ask me, and I will direct him to the forum first. Only 1 session in - he is doing a great job.
DMing as you will discover is great fun. Not DMing is also fun.
I taught my wife how to DM..and it was a very, very difficult transition since I was the eternal DM.
I had to learn how to stop helping, but only when I wasn't being asked. There were a few times I was almost put on the couch due to my back seat DMing and it caused a lot of problems, especially with confidence. She explained her position to me and I worked hard at not stepping in when not asked, it took a while.
I'd explain to your DM: I get you're trying to help, I want the help, but only when I'm asking. Please refer the players to me when they're asking DM questions, player/character questions are up for grabs however. I can only improve by having to work through the situations, I give you my word that if I get really stuck I'll ask for your help. Other than that, I don't mind the little bits of help where you point out a rule that you manage differently or a different approach to the mechanics of the game, but I'd prefer you offer them after the game.
As a DM I only wanted to help and make it easier on my wife, but in the end I was causing her to lose confidence and second guess her actions every time I raised an eyebrow at one of her decisions. Now....she's pretty good at her role, working through CoS and learning how to deal with the crazy ideas that our group comes up with since their party leader is an ex-DM. (I suplexed a vampire spawn onto holy ground and had my group pin him to the ground until we finally killed it...at level 2...)
Hey yall I may have a problem player, I have a DM in my game that I am running I am a new DM the thing is the player is having a hard time stopping being a DM. And I dont know how to deal with this as I am new to this, And also this player is my DM for me so yeah it can make things awkward in the other games this goes wrong. What is worse is they asked me to be their DM because the last DM stopped playing D&D at all I don't know what happened but I think I can see what may have started it.
I do enjoy being a DM what brought this to a head was when I asked about an idea I had for a home brewed world and I told them that this would be in the future like 6 months or more, And I want to know how they liked the sound of it before I started building it while the other player like idea the player who is also a DM started telling me yeah they liked it and then proceeded to tell how to build my world and what I had to do, And when I had told them yes I new all that and that's why it would be at least 6 months away they kept going on and on.
So my question is how do I get a DM to stop DM'ing and just be a PC.
P.S if this question has been asked before sorry I could not find it in the forums
I'm a DM... And I play in a game DM'ed by someone who is also a player at my campaign. He has never DM'ed before. We have vastly different DM-styles where I'm more "free" and he rolls for tons of stuff that I think is just a waste of time. In our situation I notice that it isn't per se bad will. We know what we'd like to see from a player. In turn we try to "help" and make things easier for each other by playing our characters well. And doing rolls for the DM and such. Some behavior just happens. And we do try to tone it down since... well you don't want to overshadow/take the fun away from the DM. It can be really difficult to turn off being a DM when it comes to knowing more rules then most of the others at the table.
I suggest to just take that person aside and have a 1-on-1 conversation. Say that you can understand its probably coming from a good place of wanting to help. But you find it annoying and want him/her to tone it down. If you have question you know that person will be there and you will ask if there is anything you need. Untill then he should "please" tone it down.
The other DM sounds really enthused by your ideas : this is a good thing!
Mostly.
I don't know what I would do*, but you should tell him that you are making this world as a thank you for all the hard work he has put in on his own campaign, and that although you value his input immensely, you feel it cheapens the gift to him if he has to help on his own present.
If he is as shallow as me, that should work!
*I have all the solutions to other people's problems, and none for my own. /sadface.
I have just started playing in a campaign run by one of the players in my campaign. Ah, the lack of stress, the chance to just turn up, only needing to remember 1 set of spells (actually, I am playing a warrior!) If he wants any help, he can ask me, and I will direct him to the forum first.
Only 1 session in - he is doing a great job.
DMing as you will discover is great fun.
Not DMing is also fun.
Roleplaying since Runequest.
Thanks everyone for the advise. I will put it to good uses
I taught my wife how to DM..and it was a very, very difficult transition since I was the eternal DM.
I had to learn how to stop helping, but only when I wasn't being asked. There were a few times I was almost put on the couch due to my back seat DMing and it caused a lot of problems, especially with confidence. She explained her position to me and I worked hard at not stepping in when not asked, it took a while.
I'd explain to your DM: I get you're trying to help, I want the help, but only when I'm asking. Please refer the players to me when they're asking DM questions, player/character questions are up for grabs however. I can only improve by having to work through the situations, I give you my word that if I get really stuck I'll ask for your help. Other than that, I don't mind the little bits of help where you point out a rule that you manage differently or a different approach to the mechanics of the game, but I'd prefer you offer them after the game.
As a DM I only wanted to help and make it easier on my wife, but in the end I was causing her to lose confidence and second guess her actions every time I raised an eyebrow at one of her decisions. Now....she's pretty good at her role, working through CoS and learning how to deal with the crazy ideas that our group comes up with since their party leader is an ex-DM. (I suplexed a vampire spawn onto holy ground and had my group pin him to the ground until we finally killed it...at level 2...)