Hey guys! We are starting our second home game. We did a kinda introductory one off type game. My wife is interested in playing with us but she has some setbacks. She is not going to be the most intensive roleplayer. She wants to play with us as a way to spend time with us and have fun. We play all kinds of card and board games so we both know she will enjoy playing through it with us.
However, creating a character is daunting for her! She will not enjoy the character creation. If i tried forcing her into it she would be overwhelmed and decide not to play. Trust me, she is my wife! haha. I want to make her a character that will be easy to play and enjoyable for someone who doesnt care about all the intricate details of classes as much. I was thinking a heavy magic class would be a bit much as she would have to constantly pay attention to and choose new spells from a large list.
I think as we play she will begin to get more into the roleplaying aspect of it little by little. So ideally she will still have a backstory but a simple one that we could easily retcon or add to as the game goes on to keep her involved and growing. I will not force the roleplay on her. She does enjoy puzzles and problem solving and she liked the fighting during our one shot we did. However, she does not want to reprise the same role she had from that one shot. Please let me know if you have any advice on a character for her!
Don't just hand her a character sheet. Sit down with her and help her make the character. And don't assume! You may think she won't want to roleplay much, but she may get inspired by the process of character creation and be super annoyed that you're trying to put training wheels on for her. Let her tell you what kind of character she wants to play, and you handle putting it into a character sheet until she gets to know where the numbers come from.
Ask her if she wants to play something like a Conan kind of character that fights things, or a knight in armor, or a Legolas kind of longbow hunter, or a magic user, or maybe a bard that writes or sings or recites poetry and inspires others, or maybe she wants to be the sneaky thief type? Let her pick.
Ask her if she wants to be a human, or an elf, or a half-orc, or a gnome of halfling, etc. Ask about the background - is she a spoiled rich brat? Or maybe she was a merchant or sailor, or etc. etc.
But let her roll the stats, and then help her put them in the right places for the character she wants. And then walk her through the starting equipment choices.
In short - don't just make a character for her, and also DON'T limit her options because of what you think she'll like. Let her choose.
Since you know more about mechanics and details, I would go with the "ask and clarify" approach and get general ideas from her while you make the actual character based on her feedback. For example, you could ask her if she wants a character who is more likely to be brains or brawn. If she chooses brawn, for example, maybe give her the options of half-orc, goliath or dwarf and explain in a general sense what each of those races are like. Try the same with classes, ask her if she'd rather be a raging fighter who favors strength and ferocity or a tactical fighter who uses martial training and precision to fight. Use each of her answers to explain the general core of each race or class that would apply (and limit it to the closest 2 or 3 to keep things simple). Then once you have a race and a class, describe the style(s) of play that would fit that combination and see if it appeals to her.
As for RP, the beauty of 5e is that you can go as heavy or as light with it as you want. Also, you can allow players to RP very different behavior than what is typically associated with a character. You could have a half-orc barbarian with a heart of gold, or a misanthropic bard who can't stand to be around other people socially. Basically, if she can work with the mechanics of the race and class, then it's only your potential decisions as a DM that really prevent her from playing a character in any way that seems fun to her.
I hope you guys come up with a great combination and have a great game!
Something that I have had good luck with some of my players that were brand new to gaming was asking if there were any tv/movie/book characters that they would like a kernel for their character.
If that starting point was a flop I went with talking about the classes in broad terms similar to what was mentioned earlier. Do you love the outdoors, how do you feel about ninjas, and other weird fun conversation starters. Other directions to go would be how would you handle certain scenarios. In a bar brawl do you try and talk everyone down, watch until things get too drowsy and step in, square up next to your homie and get ready for a throwdown, or lurk at edges until you can safely lend a helping hand, emphasis on safely.
I like large open ended questions that get them thinking about weird things and see where it takes them.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"Where words fail, swords prevail. Where blood is spilled, my cup is filled" -Cartaphilus
"I have found the answer to the meaning of life. You ask me what the answer is? You already know what the answer to life is. You fear it more than the strike of a viper, the ravages of disease, the ire of a lover. The answer is always death. But death is a gentle mistress with a sweet embrace, and you owe her a debt of restitution. Life is not a gift, it is a loan."
My girlfriend's second class was a hunter. She wanted some spells but also didn't want to get too bogged down in it. It worked out well for her so far. I'm not sure what your wife would find fun but perhaps give her some options. Rogue or fighter perhaps would be good. If she did want spells she could pick a subclass that give her some without putting too much pressure on the spell aspects of it.
I introduced my girlfriend to DND a few months ago and it sounds really close to what your going through.
We sat down had a few drinks and I walked her through the races. Explaining then all. Then to classes. Explaining then all and going into simple details on what they can do. She picked a rogue half elf.
That was all i needed. Then the fun part. Rolling her stats and explaining those and how they work. That's the most fun really. From there I finished the character sheet and she came up with a small backstory.
She's been playing with us ever since and we now have the sessions in our home.
It'll take her time to get into the swing of things like roleplay and asking questions. Just be patient and support her. From there it'll all flow together over time.
There are plenty of the decision flowcharts online to help guide people to classes if they aren't sure what they want to do.
Personally I've found that either finding out if there's a character they want to emulate, or by taking the approach of asking what they want to be able to do, what they want to look like, etc. Once you have that you can make guided suggestions/recommendations.
Something that I have had good luck with some of my players that were brand new to gaming was asking if there were any tv/movie/book characters that they would like a kernel for their character.
If that starting point was a flop I went with talking about the classes in broad terms similar to what was mentioned earlier. Do you love the outdoors, how do you feel about ninjas, and other weird fun conversation starters. Other directions to go would be how would you handle certain scenarios. In a bar brawl do you try and talk everyone down, watch until things get too drowsy and step in, square up next to your homie and get ready for a throwdown, or lurk at edges until you can safely lend a helping hand, emphasis on safely.
I like large open ended questions that get them thinking about weird things and see where it takes them.
I actually really like this idea. I thought of it a while ago then thought it was kinda cheesy. But allowing her to play a character like that may giver her a good boost just to really get started and into it. I also like the idea of "how do you handle certain scenarios. She would respond well to that!
My girlfriend's second class was a hunter. She wanted some spells but also didn't want to get too bogged down in it. It worked out well for her so far. I'm not sure what your wife would find fun but perhaps give her some options. Rogue or fighter perhaps would be good. If she did want spells she could pick a subclass that give her some without putting too much pressure on the spell aspects of it.
I haven't thought about a hunter at all. We already have a rogue in our party, so would having two rogues cause any issues? I am still a little new to party mechanics like that.
Since you know more about mechanics and details, I would go with the "ask and clarify" approach and get general ideas from her while you make the actual character based on her feedback. For example, you could ask her if she wants a character who is more likely to be brains or brawn. If she chooses brawn, for example, maybe give her the options of half-orc, goliath or dwarf and explain in a general sense what each of those races are like. Try the same with classes, ask her if she'd rather be a raging fighter who favors strength and ferocity or a tactical fighter who uses martial training and precision to fight. Use each of her answers to explain the general core of each race or class that would apply (and limit it to the closest 2 or 3 to keep things simple). Then once you have a race and a class, describe the style(s) of play that would fit that combination and see if it appeals to her.
As for RP, the beauty of 5e is that you can go as heavy or as light with it as you want. Also, you can allow players to RP very different behavior than what is typically associated with a character. You could have a half-orc barbarian with a heart of gold, or a misanthropic bard who can't stand to be around other people socially. Basically, if she can work with the mechanics of the race and class, then it's only your potential decisions as a DM that really prevent her from playing a character in any way that seems fun to her.
I hope you guys come up with a great combination and have a great game!
I like this too. The goal will be finding the right questions to ask her I guess. And that is something I love about 5e. I can roleplay pretty heavy and she doesnt have to and we can all still have fun in the same campaign.
Don't just hand her a character sheet. Sit down with her and help her make the character. And don't assume! You may think she won't want to roleplay much, but she may get inspired by the process of character creation and be super annoyed that you're trying to put training wheels on for her. Let her tell you what kind of character she wants to play, and you handle putting it into a character sheet until she gets to know where the numbers come from.
Ask her if she wants to play something like a Conan kind of character that fights things, or a knight in armor, or a Legolas kind of longbow hunter, or a magic user, or maybe a bard that writes or sings or recites poetry and inspires others, or maybe she wants to be the sneaky thief type? Let her pick.
Ask her if she wants to be a human, or an elf, or a half-orc, or a gnome of halfling, etc. Ask about the background - is she a spoiled rich brat? Or maybe she was a merchant or sailor, or etc. etc.
But let her roll the stats, and then help her put them in the right places for the character she wants. And then walk her through the starting equipment choices.
In short - don't just make a character for her, and also DON'T limit her options because of what you think she'll like. Let her choose.
Yeah. I tried going this route in the beginning. It could be that I was not asking the best questions or presenting it in the best way. But at this point she has asked me to make it for her and my goal is to make her a character that is easy to pick up, but wont limit her like you said. I just want a basic one that as we start to play, she really develops it. If I try to force her to make a character when she doesn't want to, she will be frustrated (that has happened) and then that frustration will be connected to her when she plays the character.
Although, maybe I could have that be part of her character? An aspect could be an inability to make a decision and that could be used to lead to fun or sticky situations by the DM.
Everyone gave good advice, but if you want an outright recommendation I would say go with Rogue. Its a simple class at its core, but can be played with much more complexity if desired.
If you're starting at level one there won't be many mechanics you remind her of at once. Once she memorizes how to use Sneak Attack she'll get Cunning Action, and so forth.
Build the character with high Stealth, Perception, and Insight so she can mostly lurk if she doesn't feel like RP'ing too much at first but can still contribute by being the person who notices things.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Canto alla vita alla sua bellezza ad ogni sua ferita ogni sua carezza!
I sing to life and to its tragic beauty To pain and to strife, but all that dances through me The rise and the fall, I've lived through it all!
In that case, I'd say, OK, I'll build a starter character for you. If at any point you decide you don't like the character, then we can retire them or give them an awesome death scene and we can build you a new character to introduce to the party.
So on that basis, maybe wrap some of those aspects into the character. She doesn't really want to think about it, she just wants to do. So, sort of a Leeroy Jenkins kind of character - that screams barbarian. (Doesn't have to be a *dumb* barbarian - I keep thinking about the barbarian king in JourneyQuest who has these progressive yet "uncivilized" ideas about implementing socialized medicine and gender equality with women fighting alongside the men...)
So you can sell that one to her - the barbarian doesn't want to think about decisions much, they just want to get to the action. And their rage (or frustration, or boredom) is an asset, not a drawback.
I agree with most people here that asking some general questions about her preference is the best way to start. If you could play as any fictional or real race, Elves, dwarfs, Goblins, Cat people, anything at all, what would you pick? Would you rather have big muscles, or a clever mind? Which do you think is cooler, bows and arrows, or swords and shields. This will help you pinpoint what suggestions are most likely to resonate with her.
I would like to add however, that you might consider building character who is designed to be less animated and noticeable. Someone who’s character gives them a reason to stay in the background. That way, you can roll play your character while avoiding the pressure of feeling like you are supposed to be constantly acting in front of other people, or that your character is boring because they don't talk enough.
Here are some examples of the sort of characters I’m thinking about.
Supper shy character:
She doesn’t talk much, So you don’t have to talk much. Just say, ‘my character doesn’t say anything in response to the NPC’s question and just shrinks down in her seat peering cautiously over the edge of the table.” That counts as roll play. No uncomfortable acting required.
Bonus points for playing a rogue who can hide as a bonus action and has expertise in stealth.
Bonus points for playing a lightfoot Halfling who can hide behind the other party members.
If you go this route, I Recommend she has at least one member of the party who her character looks up to and follows and who can look after her as a kind of big brother figure.
Introverted student:
She would rather read a book than talk with an NPC. This lets you explain why you are not interacting as much, but makes it easy for you to jump into the RP whenever you feel like it without feeling like you are acting out of character.
Has Lot's of Future story opportunities if she meets with someone from the same magical school. perhaps a friend, or a sempi she looks up to. or someone who hates her because all exams are graded on a curve, and she broke the curve making everyone else look bad!
Works well with any castor class, though I would go with warlock. Warlocks can focus on enrich blast + Hex making them rather easy to play. The hardest part is picking out which invocations and spells to use, and you can do that part for her based on what she says she likes.
Also, pact of the tomb can be your text book.
Also, your patron can literally be your academic advisor.
Guzzled war torn veteran:
Goes adventuring because she just can’t go back to civilian life.
Doesn’t like to talk about her past in the war. Doesn’t like to talk much at all. So there is no need to RP interactions with other party members until she is ready to open up.
Likely very protective of their party members, since they have seen so many of their friends die, they don’t want it to happen again. Good for tank builds.
Could be literally any martial class. I personally think fighter is the simplest and easiest to work with. But this is where you find out what kind of fighting style she prefers. Rushing into combat head first? (barbarian or fighter) Firing arrows from a safe distance? (fighter or ranger) Dealing lots of damage in a single hit? (paladin or rogue)
All these examples provide a reasonable Role Play excuses for why the character wouldn’t want to interact with other people all the time, allowing the player to stay in the background until she is ready. However, each one has a distinctive identity making it easy for you and your party members to know exactly who you are even if you don’t always speak up very often. The goal is to have a memorable character that you can roll play in fun ways while simultaneously avoiding the spot light. Role Play doesn’t have to be over the top acting. It just has to transfer the image of who this character is from the mind of the player to the minds of everyone one else at the table.
This has been a very nice thread, I'm glad those involved have been supportive. Goodluck with everything.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"Where words fail, swords prevail. Where blood is spilled, my cup is filled" -Cartaphilus
"I have found the answer to the meaning of life. You ask me what the answer is? You already know what the answer to life is. You fear it more than the strike of a viper, the ravages of disease, the ire of a lover. The answer is always death. But death is a gentle mistress with a sweet embrace, and you owe her a debt of restitution. Life is not a gift, it is a loan."
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Hey guys! We are starting our second home game. We did a kinda introductory one off type game. My wife is interested in playing with us but she has some setbacks. She is not going to be the most intensive roleplayer. She wants to play with us as a way to spend time with us and have fun. We play all kinds of card and board games so we both know she will enjoy playing through it with us.
However, creating a character is daunting for her! She will not enjoy the character creation. If i tried forcing her into it she would be overwhelmed and decide not to play. Trust me, she is my wife! haha. I want to make her a character that will be easy to play and enjoyable for someone who doesnt care about all the intricate details of classes as much. I was thinking a heavy magic class would be a bit much as she would have to constantly pay attention to and choose new spells from a large list.
I think as we play she will begin to get more into the roleplaying aspect of it little by little. So ideally she will still have a backstory but a simple one that we could easily retcon or add to as the game goes on to keep her involved and growing. I will not force the roleplay on her. She does enjoy puzzles and problem solving and she liked the fighting during our one shot we did. However, she does not want to reprise the same role she had from that one shot. Please let me know if you have any advice on a character for her!
Don't just hand her a character sheet. Sit down with her and help her make the character. And don't assume! You may think she won't want to roleplay much, but she may get inspired by the process of character creation and be super annoyed that you're trying to put training wheels on for her. Let her tell you what kind of character she wants to play, and you handle putting it into a character sheet until she gets to know where the numbers come from.
Ask her if she wants to play something like a Conan kind of character that fights things, or a knight in armor, or a Legolas kind of longbow hunter, or a magic user, or maybe a bard that writes or sings or recites poetry and inspires others, or maybe she wants to be the sneaky thief type? Let her pick.
Ask her if she wants to be a human, or an elf, or a half-orc, or a gnome of halfling, etc. Ask about the background - is she a spoiled rich brat? Or maybe she was a merchant or sailor, or etc. etc.
But let her roll the stats, and then help her put them in the right places for the character she wants. And then walk her through the starting equipment choices.
In short - don't just make a character for her, and also DON'T limit her options because of what you think she'll like. Let her choose.
Since you know more about mechanics and details, I would go with the "ask and clarify" approach and get general ideas from her while you make the actual character based on her feedback. For example, you could ask her if she wants a character who is more likely to be brains or brawn. If she chooses brawn, for example, maybe give her the options of half-orc, goliath or dwarf and explain in a general sense what each of those races are like. Try the same with classes, ask her if she'd rather be a raging fighter who favors strength and ferocity or a tactical fighter who uses martial training and precision to fight. Use each of her answers to explain the general core of each race or class that would apply (and limit it to the closest 2 or 3 to keep things simple). Then once you have a race and a class, describe the style(s) of play that would fit that combination and see if it appeals to her.
As for RP, the beauty of 5e is that you can go as heavy or as light with it as you want. Also, you can allow players to RP very different behavior than what is typically associated with a character. You could have a half-orc barbarian with a heart of gold, or a misanthropic bard who can't stand to be around other people socially. Basically, if she can work with the mechanics of the race and class, then it's only your potential decisions as a DM that really prevent her from playing a character in any way that seems fun to her.
I hope you guys come up with a great combination and have a great game!
Something that I have had good luck with some of my players that were brand new to gaming was asking if there were any tv/movie/book characters that they would like a kernel for their character.
If that starting point was a flop I went with talking about the classes in broad terms similar to what was mentioned earlier. Do you love the outdoors, how do you feel about ninjas, and other weird fun conversation starters. Other directions to go would be how would you handle certain scenarios. In a bar brawl do you try and talk everyone down, watch until things get too drowsy and step in, square up next to your homie and get ready for a throwdown, or lurk at edges until you can safely lend a helping hand, emphasis on safely.
I like large open ended questions that get them thinking about weird things and see where it takes them.
"Where words fail, swords prevail. Where blood is spilled, my cup is filled" -Cartaphilus
"I have found the answer to the meaning of life. You ask me what the answer is? You already know what the answer to life is. You fear it more than the strike of a viper, the ravages of disease, the ire of a lover. The answer is always death. But death is a gentle mistress with a sweet embrace, and you owe her a debt of restitution. Life is not a gift, it is a loan."
What class did she play previously?
My girlfriend's second class was a hunter. She wanted some spells but also didn't want to get too bogged down in it. It worked out well for her so far. I'm not sure what your wife would find fun but perhaps give her some options. Rogue or fighter perhaps would be good. If she did want spells she could pick a subclass that give her some without putting too much pressure on the spell aspects of it.
Barbarian for a wife. 😀
I introduced my girlfriend to DND a few months ago and it sounds really close to what your going through.
We sat down had a few drinks and I walked her through the races. Explaining then all. Then to classes. Explaining then all and going into simple details on what they can do. She picked a rogue half elf.
That was all i needed. Then the fun part. Rolling her stats and explaining those and how they work. That's the most fun really. From there I finished the character sheet and she came up with a small backstory.
She's been playing with us ever since and we now have the sessions in our home.
It'll take her time to get into the swing of things like roleplay and asking questions. Just be patient and support her. From there it'll all flow together over time.
There are plenty of the decision flowcharts online to help guide people to classes if they aren't sure what they want to do.
Personally I've found that either finding out if there's a character they want to emulate, or by taking the approach of asking what they want to be able to do, what they want to look like, etc. Once you have that you can make guided suggestions/recommendations.
Please take a look at my homebrewed Spells, Magic Items, and Subclasses. Any feedback appreciated.
I actually really like this idea. I thought of it a while ago then thought it was kinda cheesy. But allowing her to play a character like that may giver her a good boost just to really get started and into it. I also like the idea of "how do you handle certain scenarios. She would respond well to that!
I haven't thought about a hunter at all. We already have a rogue in our party, so would having two rogues cause any issues? I am still a little new to party mechanics like that.
I like this too. The goal will be finding the right questions to ask her I guess. And that is something I love about 5e. I can roleplay pretty heavy and she doesnt have to and we can all still have fun in the same campaign.
Thank you everyone for the feedback so far! I think I have at least gotten a good starting point to go from!
Yeah. I tried going this route in the beginning. It could be that I was not asking the best questions or presenting it in the best way. But at this point she has asked me to make it for her and my goal is to make her a character that is easy to pick up, but wont limit her like you said. I just want a basic one that as we start to play, she really develops it. If I try to force her to make a character when she doesn't want to, she will be frustrated (that has happened) and then that frustration will be connected to her when she plays the character.
Although, maybe I could have that be part of her character? An aspect could be an inability to make a decision and that could be used to lead to fun or sticky situations by the DM.
Everyone gave good advice, but if you want an outright recommendation I would say go with Rogue. Its a simple class at its core, but can be played with much more complexity if desired.
If you're starting at level one there won't be many mechanics you remind her of at once. Once she memorizes how to use Sneak Attack she'll get Cunning Action, and so forth.
Build the character with high Stealth, Perception, and Insight so she can mostly lurk if she doesn't feel like RP'ing too much at first but can still contribute by being the person who notices things.
Canto alla vita
alla sua bellezza
ad ogni sua ferita
ogni sua carezza!
I sing to life and to its tragic beauty
To pain and to strife, but all that dances through me
The rise and the fall, I've lived through it all!
In that case, I'd say, OK, I'll build a starter character for you. If at any point you decide you don't like the character, then we can retire them or give them an awesome death scene and we can build you a new character to introduce to the party.
So on that basis, maybe wrap some of those aspects into the character. She doesn't really want to think about it, she just wants to do. So, sort of a Leeroy Jenkins kind of character - that screams barbarian. (Doesn't have to be a *dumb* barbarian - I keep thinking about the barbarian king in JourneyQuest who has these progressive yet "uncivilized" ideas about implementing socialized medicine and gender equality with women fighting alongside the men...)
So you can sell that one to her - the barbarian doesn't want to think about decisions much, they just want to get to the action. And their rage (or frustration, or boredom) is an asset, not a drawback.
I agree with most people here that asking some general questions about her preference is the best way to start. If you could play as any fictional or real race, Elves, dwarfs, Goblins, Cat people, anything at all, what would you pick? Would you rather have big muscles, or a clever mind? Which do you think is cooler, bows and arrows, or swords and shields. This will help you pinpoint what suggestions are most likely to resonate with her.
I would like to add however, that you might consider building character who is designed to be less animated and noticeable. Someone who’s character gives them a reason to stay in the background. That way, you can roll play your character while avoiding the pressure of feeling like you are supposed to be constantly acting in front of other people, or that your character is boring because they don't talk enough.
Here are some examples of the sort of characters I’m thinking about.
All these examples provide a reasonable Role Play excuses for why the character wouldn’t want to interact with other people all the time, allowing the player to stay in the background until she is ready. However, each one has a distinctive identity making it easy for you and your party members to know exactly who you are even if you don’t always speak up very often. The goal is to have a memorable character that you can roll play in fun ways while simultaneously avoiding the spot light. Role Play doesn’t have to be over the top acting. It just has to transfer the image of who this character is from the mind of the player to the minds of everyone one else at the table.
This has been a very nice thread, I'm glad those involved have been supportive. Goodluck with everything.
"Where words fail, swords prevail. Where blood is spilled, my cup is filled" -Cartaphilus
"I have found the answer to the meaning of life. You ask me what the answer is? You already know what the answer to life is. You fear it more than the strike of a viper, the ravages of disease, the ire of a lover. The answer is always death. But death is a gentle mistress with a sweet embrace, and you owe her a debt of restitution. Life is not a gift, it is a loan."