the luchador: a monk that adds points to strength and gets skill in grappling so that they can grab and throw people while also crushing their femur

Strength on a monk is hard to do because you also need Dex and Wis for AC and save DC’s. I would also say “to-hit” but you can use strength for that. 

One option for a grapple build on monk is to go Astral Self and take the Skill Expert feat to get Expertise in Athletics. That way you can focus on Wisdom and while your arms are active your grapple checks can be made with wisdom. 
But that probably doesn’t fit your theme  but really, your look is up to you and DM. You might still be muscled despite the average STR score   

Just remember the astral arms cannot grapple but you would use your regular arms to grapple and can use the astral arms, if you like, to attack.

Either way, STR or Astral builds would benefit from expertise in Athletics so the Skill Expert feat helps here. 

Edit: if you go STR and not Astral then maybe Open Hand would fit as best subclass. You could flavor the push option for Open Hand Technique as a throw, if you are looking for distance but not having them prone at the end. Or the Prone option for a body slam or something. 

Way of the Hand, until the nerf in UA8.  Now I think Way of the Shadow/Warrior of the Shadow because of the using shadows to teleport and hide abilities. Not to mention UA8's version lets you spend three DP's to become invisible, partially incorporeal and use Flurry of Blows for free for 10 rounds in your darkness. 

i understood none of that, not to be rude, im seeing this at like 3:15 am and not wearing my glasses so im not getting a thing. but yeah i know strength aint a monks focus, but i never said it hurts dex, it just boosts strength, also im just sick of the martial arts X magic sort of classes so a melee focus class is what i was going for

Quote from confusedintrovert61253 >>

i understood none of that, not to be rude, im seeing this at like 3:15 am and not wearing my glasses so im not getting a thing. but yeah i know strength aint a monks focus, but i never said it hurts dex, it just boosts strength, also im just sick of the martial arts X magic sort of classes so a melee focus class is what i was going for

 Maybe I misunderstood what you were looking for. I was just saying that depending on what method you use to generate your ability scores, points out into strength are points not going into dexterity, which will affect your Armor Class since monks can’t wear armor. If that’s not a concern then ignore it. 

if you don’t care for the martial arts with magic feel then maybe Battle Master Fighter with the Unarmed Fighting Style with the Skill Expert feat to get expertise in athletics might fit better what you are looking for

I like the idea of a strength based monk.  It's been talked about on the forums quite a bit.  The issue to overcome is unarmored armor class. 

For that you could do a custom formula. Something like "you can use your strength modifier in place of your dex modifier when calculating unarmored armor class"

There are plenty of examples in dnd  where one ability score modifier is substituted for another regardless if it makes any sense or not so this should be fine. 

Or simply have your DM incorporate the UA rules posted in UA8, where they turning dex for grappling instead of Str. Problem solved 

How would someone go about doing that? It seems that D&D Beyond automatically calculates the AC based on DEX and WIS modifiers summed up. I can't seem to find a way to nullify the WIS AC bonus.

Quote from Vokolsar >>

How would someone go about doing that? It seems that D&D Beyond automatically calculates the AC based on DEX and WIS modifiers summed up. I can't seem to find a way to nullify the WIS AC bonus.

The simplest way would be, go to your character sheet, click on the armor class, customize it to reflect the 10+DEX+STR scores. You have the option to just override it. So if you have a STR 16, DEX 16, WIS 12 the sheet will automatically set your AC to 14. But you can just override it and make it 16. You would have to manually adjust it each time your scores change, and probably if you added a magic item like Ring of Protection 

One option is to take a level of fighter or heavy armor proficient cleric. Then wear heavy armor as a monk (will cost you a couple of abilities, but leaves a surprising amount in tact). Pick up unarmed fighting style. 

Then take Kensei monk for your subclass and don't worry about dealing that much damage. You'll have 20 ac early on, and access to a bonus action dodge with ki. 

Finally, at level five grab sentinel. Even if you can't grapple opponents all the time, you can keep them with you. 

Eventually you'll have access to the sentinel opportunity attack, stunning strike, and an ok ability to wrestle larger or smaller targets. 

I would be tempted to take more levels in fighter later on to pick up Rune Knight or Battlemaster (trip attack or menacing attack would synergize great). 

Quote from ThriKreenWarrior >>

Strength on a monk is hard to do because you also need Dex and Wis for AC

You don't "need" it.  He can simply opt to be a strength based Monk and use armor. He didn't specify that he cared about the monk features that requires you to not have armor.   Another scenario:  he simply keeps his armor in a bag over his shoulder or horse until he think he needs to don it. That would be especially interesting if he came across magical armor. 🤷🏿‍♂️

Quote from MPA >>

Quote from ThriKreenWarrior >>

Strength on a monk is hard to do because you also need Dex and Wis for AC

 

You don't "need" it.  He can simply opt to be a strength based Monk and use armor. He didn't specify that he cared about the monk features that requires you to not have armor.   Another scenario:  he simply keeps his armor in a bag over his shoulder or horse until he think he needs to don it. That would be especially interesting if he came across magical armor. 🤷🏿‍♂️

 True they didn’t specify if they cared about the armor restrictions, I just assumed since typically people play the monk to use its features. Although there are builds for monks with armor on this forum. 

Deleted for partial clarity🫡

Quote from confusedintrovert61253 >>

the luchador: a monk that adds points to strength and gets skill in grappling so that they can grab and throw people while also crushing their femur

 Luchador?

From Wiki - Lucha libre wrestlers are known as luchadores (singular luchador) and often come from extended wrestling families who form their own stables. One such line integrated to the United States professional wrestling scene is Los Guerreros.

Spanish for wrestler

I'd just go with a grappling-focused barbarian. 

One thing I hate consistently about almost every class.(I kinda get it for wizard and maybe sorcerer)

The necessaries.

I mean how cool would it be to have a strength based monk! with wisdom still, bu tmore brawler focused than speed and crap.

A dex barbarian? Raging and zooming through the battlefield, slicing down foes with insane speed?

A warlock that uses it's intelligence of its patron to cast spells rather then flipping CHARISMA?

A blacksmithing Artificier who focuses on INT and STR rather then DEX, so. many. things!

Just imagine how cool it would be for a nordic skald bard NOT BASED ON DEX! I actually made that- he was cool.

A strength-based druid who always morphs into a bear and does stuff like crushing peoples skulls? That be so sick!

You shouldn't have to lose points to make a good character! What about a monk that knows its body so well and anatomy too, like a doctor, that it uses intelligence for ki!

Do you see what I'm saying here? A cleric that heals with intelligence? Cuz its smart? And it uses knowledge of medicine to heal? A paladin that uses charisma for spellcasting? A dexterity based paladin?

Quote from MPA >>

Quote from ThriKreenWarrior >>

Strength on a monk is hard to do because you also need Dex and Wis for AC

 

You don't "need" it.  He can simply opt to be a strength based Monk and use armor. He didn't specify that he cared about the monk features that requires you to not have armor.   Another scenario:  he simply keeps his armor in a bag over his shoulder or horse until he think he needs to don it. That would be especially interesting if he came across magical armor. 🤷🏿‍♂️

 like this- you kinda do cuz of proficiencies and like half the abilities- thats why my DM lets us use custom ability scores that he admits and thinks are fine.

Quote from MADMAX79812 >>

Do you see what I'm saying here? A cleric that heals with intelligence? Cuz its smart? And it uses knowledge of medicine to heal? A paladin that uses charisma for spellcasting? A dexterity based paladin?

 I am currently playing a dex-based Vengeance Paladin. He is a Thri-Kreen wielding Shortsword, Scimitar, Rapier, and Shield (love the extra hands) using only his natural carapace armor (AC 13+DEX). His nickname is "The Buggy Blender".  Most of the builds you have talked about are viable, if not necessarily optimal. You just have to be more careful with the build and work out how to solve some of the problems that non-meta builds have, but I think that makes them more fun.

Quote from MADMAX79812 >>

A paladin that uses charisma for spellcasting? 

Using Charisma for spellcasting is the default for D&D Fifth Edition Paladins.