Roleplaying 101: Playing a High Charisma Character as a Shy Player

Some of the most daunting character archetypes to play are those with a high Charisma score. It can be terrifying and overwhelming to play a character with a silver tongue if you, yourself, don't feel like you have one. But you shouldn't let your inhibitions stop you from creating a character that you'd enjoy.

In this article, we'll discuss how you can play a high Charisma character so that they can shine in game while you remain comfortable out of game.

Rethinking Characters With High Charisma

In the real world, we tend to think of charismatic people as being smooth talkers, magnetic leaders, and charming folks who always know the right thing to say in a tight spot. We take this stereotype into our approach of charismatic characters in Dungeons and Dragons. But that’s a narrow view that restricts high Charisma characters to players who are naturally outgoing. We should broaden our approach to high Charisma characters in order to make them accessible to anyone.

Charisma as a Game Term

It's important to uncouple “charismatic” as an adjective we use in real life from the Charisma ability we use as a game term.

While we may think of Charisma as having a charm or magical magnetism, the Player’s Handbook gives us a slightly different meaning: it measures a character’s force of personality. This isn’t just silly semantics. The Player’s Handbook is intentional in its explanation of this mechanic in order to leave space for all kinds of different approaches to the ability. There are four character classes, for example, that utilize Charisma as its spellcasting ability. A narrow definition of Charisma would reduce the flavor of these distinct classes.

When it comes to ability checks, Charisma is further described as a character’s effect on folks and their "ability to interact effectively with others.” Making a Charisma (Persuasion) check, then, isn't necessarily about channeling your flamboyance, natural wit, or smooth charm. There are plenty of other ways to build and play a character with a powerful force of personality that allows them to influence others.

Not Your Typical Party Face

When the characters are having a conversation with an important NPC, it’s common for players to expect the character with the highest Charisma score to take the lead. After all, who better to be rolling to persuade or deceive an NPC than the character with the highest bonus?

When a more charismatic player is playing a charismatic character, they may not mind doing most of the talking. But it isn’t fair to put that expectation on a player who doesn’t want that. A talkative person playing a strong fighter may find themselves handling a larger slice of social encounters, and that’s fine. The whole group works together to complete an exploration or combat encounter, and the same idea should hold true for social encounters.

Thus, the more talkative player may initiate the conversation and have other folks chime in. Then, the high Charisma character adds their own force of personality—whatever form that takes—and helps resolve the encounter by rolling the final Charisma ability check.

Adopting Third-Person Roleplay

Tavern patrons argue in a fine establishment
Many people are introduced to D&D via an actual play that has an above average number of players who enjoy the "acting" style of play. First-person roleplay is when you speak in character, using words like "I," "me," or "we." For example, "I take a step forward and say 'I’m so sorry, barkeep. My friend has had a really bad day, and they took it out on your beer mugs. I’d be happy to pay for the damage.' I take 10 gold out of my purse, and offer it to them." First-person roleplay can be a lot of fun, but it can also make playing a high Charisma character even more intimidating.

Third-person roleplay may be more accessible for shy or less talkative players. Instead of speaking in character, you describe your character's actions, narrating as if from an outside perspective. You'll use the character’s name or pronouns such as "they," "he," or "she." For example, "Abantas steps forward, her eyes flashing slightly from her aasimar heritage. She apologizes profusely, explaining how badly Sam’s day went, and holds out 10 gold to pay for all the damage her friend caused."

DMs, Take Note of the Different Player Types

Dungeon Masters may wish to review the “Know Your Players” section in the introduction of the Dungeon Master’s Guide. It’s important to keep in mind that not everyone is the "acting" player type, who wants to speak in character.

A Different, Not Lesser Form of Roleplay

Third-person roleplay is perfectly valid, and not a lesser form of roleplay. Many folks even mix and match approaches, depending on the situation in-game. Narrating social encounters in the third person is an accessible method, allowing anyone to play a charming party leader. Here are some examples of third-person narration:

  • "Montaz smiles broadly, and begins beguiling the crowd with tales of their journey. He embellishes the way we handled the ambush on that mountain pass, totally playing up how many bandits we ran off."
  • "As the discussion starts turning a little heated, Jamal pulls out his banjo and starts to strum a quiet, calming tune, to lower the tension of the room. Since Vak seems to be the most angry and divisive, Jamal picks an old dwarven ballad about working together that he remembers him humming."
  • "When they start objecting, Shelagh puffs out her chest to make herself look as big as she can, flexes her arms slightly, and starts gruffly listing the party’s recent accomplishments, to prove that they are more than capable of handling a few zombies."
  • "Sasha looks at the city guard, and begins explaining the events of the night, and how they really were just trying to catch up to the guy that murdered the innkeeper. She genuinely apologizes for the mess the group made in the process."

Player Tips for Improving Roleplay

One of the best ways to improve roleplay is to dig into the specifics of the action your character is taking. Don’t just state what they do—narrate how they are doing it. Does she look angry or worried? Is his voice gruff or calm? Are they puffing their chest out proudly, or shrinking behind a friend in fear?

You should also actively look for, and create, opportunities for roleplaying moments. Pay attention to the other people at the table, and respond to the actions their characters take.

Third-Person Roleplay Still Requires Careful Detail

Some DMs may be concerned that third-person narration allows a complex social encounter to be reduced to "I roll Persuasion," but that isn’t the way third-person roleplay inherently works. Third-person roleplay still requires the player to describe the specific actions their character wishes to take, the same as first-person roleplay. The difference is simply a matter of style and presentation.

Just as it’s perfectly alright for the fighter player to describe how she angrily throws her axe at a target, rather than literally demonstrate it, it’s also okay for a bard player to describe his demeanor and the general story he is telling, without having to act it out.

Types of Quiet High Charisma Characters

Adventurers investigate scrolls over a tableSince Charisma can take many forms, let's examine a few different character archetypes that don’t directly put the character in the role of primary communicator. These types will enable your fellow players to take the lead in most social interactions, leaving you space to back them up with different displays of your character’s commanding presence.

The Silent Type

Some of the most influential people are those who say little. On those rare occasions when they step forward to share their viewpoint, everyone listens closely. They do not insert themselves into discussions often, or take the lead in social situations, but the times they do choose to speak up, people do what they say.

Oriyen, the dragonborn Oath of the Ancients paladin. Before he made his oath, Oriyen was a hermit and spent several decades meditating on deep truths. He enjoys having companionship again but doesn’t feel the need to fill the silence with words or be the one in charge. Oriyen takes delight in silently watching the world around him. However, he will loudly speak up in discussions of morality. During those rare times, he passionately argues for action, and all heads turn to listen to his wise and convicting words.

The Shy Artist

Art moves us in unique and deeply emotional ways. Music in a movie, for instance, can affect us more strongly than the sharpest acting performance. The same can be said for visual art, poetry, and other methods of artistic expression. Instead of using persuasive words, the shy artist effectively uses their art to evoke the desired emotion when interacting with people. This is an obvious archetype for bards, who might play their instrument in the background while their friends hash out a negotiation with the city guards, but it can also be done with any other art form.

Henrijk, mountain dwarf Shadow sorcerer. Henrijk is shy and quiet. He doesn’t tell his own stories, but he loves to use magical wisps of shadows to illustrate someone else’s words. While his friends handle most of the talking, Henrijk creates beautiful shapes and creatures around the group. No matter how basic or pale his friends’ words may seem on the surface, Henrijk breathes life into them with his artistic performance.

The Doer

Even the most beautiful and persuasive words can fall flat without action behind them. People can talk a big game, but when it comes to actually following through, they are nowhere to be seen. The “doer” is the opposite of this. They begin acting immediately, even while someone else is talking. They might build a strong reputation over time, and present themselves as a driving force capable of making good on the party’s words. This reputation might be backed up by something visually distinctive, like an organization's patch or tattoo.

Nerea, the gnomish College of Swords bard. Always the first one to act, Nerea is deeply practical and favors deeds over words. They meet problems head on, never leave a job half-finished, and have earned a well-deserved reputation. They display a distinctive logo on their vest and, rather than standing around trying to convince someone of the party’s good intentions, Nerea allows the logo to fall into sight, and punctuates their colleague’s words with a flourish of their sword. This brings a confidence and a sense of command to even the most hesitant of conversations.

Find What Works for You

Playing a high Charisma character doesn’t have to be intimidating. Charisma in D&D is about your character’s effectiveness in interacting with others, but there is no one way to do that. Your character can utilize music, magical effects, racial traits, costumes, and so much more, in addition to persuasive arguments. Regardless of your character archetype, narrating your actions from an outside perspective can be a much more comfortable experience.

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Alyssa (@alyssavisscher) frequently rambles on Twitter about D&D. She especially enjoys analyzing its overall structure from a newbie perspective, bringing larger concepts to small, bite-sized pieces. She’s a parent of four, neurodivergent, disabled, and is impressively terrible at small talk.

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