Here are my experiences. First ever session was back in the 80s. None of us were sure what to expect or how to play. We learned as we went along and it was fun. Then college, work and family got in the way and I stopped playing.
Fast forward to four years ago when my adult daughter got into playing. She introduced me to CR which introduced me to 5e. Her group of 20 somethings was willing to let me play with them (I'm in my 50s). My first session was outstanding. The DM was welcoming and more than willing to get me up to speed. We play online as not everyone is in the same city. I also run a game for my daughter and her fiancé so we can roll dice at the table. Her fiancé has DM'd a game or two but they are in college so he can't do it on a regular basis.
I've played one pick up game. The DM was welcoming and we used pre-made characters. It wasn't a one shot just a modified session of a campaign they were already playing to help give new players a taste of the game. The DM was really trying hard to give beginners a good experience and teach them. It's hard when there are that many players (there were 10 of us). Not much RP but it was a game to teach newbies how to play and the hardest part of the game for beginners tends to be combat.
I can definitely see why your first experience was not enjoyable for you and hope you eventually find a group that meets your needs.
I guess my first game could be split up into my 3 phases of playing D&D and each being very different from the others…
Phase 1 - late 90s for a few months, and I was in my early 20’s. At Uni one of my flat mates invited me to join a game of 2nd edition D&D. It was an established group and I played a pre-made character. The group was heavy RP and I felt a bit awkward fitting in. Their was some combat and I had to figure out how THAC0 worked lol.
Phase 2 - early 2000’s to mid 2000’s (I’m in my early/mid 30’s) me and my local Friends (all tabletop gamers - heavy into Warhammer and Magic the gathering) thought it would be great to try out 3rd edition. One of my friends DMd and it was a blast. Not much RP, but a couple of us tried. Very tactical focus and most of us tried to game the level ups. A year or so later I DMd my first game, and created a campaign from scratch. I was more interested in RP by then, but they wasn’t. It didn’t go too well, until the action started.
Phase 3 - (now mid 40’s) last year I took the lead again and got my group of friends back into D&D I’m the groups DM. Most of us have careers and family responsibilities so it’s hard to schedule anything more than once every 2 months, but we make the effort. I’ve gone with a premade campaign, as I don’t have time to do one from scratch. But I’m still keen to encourage RP, and RP each NPC. But I’ve got a lot more confident and do a lot of presentations in my job, so putting on a voice for my friends is super easy for me now. At the same time I know my friends who are ‘now’ a mix of RP comfortable and some combat heavy PC gamers, so tailor my sessions to suit. I’m also DM for my Daughter now (just the two of us).
I’d love to play again (online) as a character (I’ve got so many ideas and voices lol) but would need a very understanding group (could prob do 1 session a month at best), but I’ve sort of resigned to being a DM for the time being.
Each different experiences and each I had different expectations. I think I learned good lessons from my previous two starts, which helped me be a good (I hope) DM now.
If I could say one thing just to you, it would be Stick with it, it’s worth it in the end. might take sometime but that group you want will happen somehow.
Ok I will say that over 20+ years of playing TTRPG's I have played in and GM'd many many groups who do little to no actual RP as you see it done on streaming sites. Many will play in the 3rd person, describing only things very relevant to what is happening in scene, many never RP chit chat round a fire for instance.
This is not to say you should not feel disheartened, there is plenty you have described that sends up red flags for this group, but please don't set roleplay expectations as high as the like of critical roll, in 20+ years of playing and DMing with probably about 80 people in total probably only 8 of them played the game in that way when it came to RP, and they where unique because they where all drama students.
My current campaign is a great example, we have great fun but in a 3 hour session the players may talk in character a handful of times if that, largely they will describe what they are doing or tell me what they want to say. They will also just tell each other information about themselves that they will have shared as and when it is relevant, they will not have those deep meaningful conversations in game about parents, or where they come from.
OP, I read some of the above posts but not all of them and I hope my comments below might offer some help.
1) There are many ways to play D&D and RPG's in general, from computer game, battle to battel and to the other extreme of all actors. It can be tough to find a group that matches your play style. So I recommend you ask questions (if possible) to see what the game is like and how they play.
2) Often I have seen if you play in a public space it needs to be open to the public. So if the group meets at the library it needs to be open to people even if the group may not be. Also it sounds like to me from your description and my ability to guess about what happened that the GM did not really expect other people to show up and or was prepared for it.
3) All GM's and players are not professionals in writing, directing, acting, running the game and or playing the game. So I would expect your experience to be different from most stream's you would see. It might be as extreme a difference as a professional play and a kindergarten play in quality and or your expiations.
4) Often games that focus on new players focus on the rules and how they work so that leaves less time for RP (again RP time varies a lot from group to group). But as you move on from intro games often RP time can increase in the overall time.
5) One thing that opened up my mind as to the vastly different styles and games was to go to a game convention (not net back then or at least not a civilian net) and play in and try out a lot of games. But you need the time to go, access to such an event and keep an open mind as to what you may experience and if that experience is the only way the game can be run and or played.
I had never played D&D and really wanted to give it a shot. So, I bought the Essentials Kit and put a flyer up at work looking for players. I'm not the best DM by any stretch, but it's been over 2 years since we started, and I have a great group of three players. Some other folks have come and gone, and one young lady comes back at the end of each story arc to spice things up. It's been great.
So, I'm sorry your first session went so poorly. But yeah, randos are often gonna be that way. Done give up!
The first time I played was in the 70s. We didn't really know what we were doing so I created an AD&D character, but the module was Keep on the Borderlands. There was no RP that I remember, mostly just sneaking around and fighting.
Had a great time even though I got eaten by the Owlbear.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"Sooner or later, your Players are going to smash your railroad into a sandbox."
-Vedexent
"real life is a super high CR."
-OboeLauren
"............anybody got any potatoes? We could drop a potato in each hole an' see which ones get viciously mauled by horrible monsters?"
I play a lot of adventures league, where you can carry over character progression over a series of disconnected oneshots. This sounds like what you played, but it should be noted that there's nothing wrong with playing a game centered more around combat.
On such games, time restrictions have to be accounted for. Giving the players a complete experience within a set amount of time means that some aspects must be sacrificed. Sure, I've played with some amazing DMs who put in the work and give an amazing RP experience with lots of character/npc interaction and dialogue. But, there are also DMs who can't, and they're no lesser for it. We as players should be grateful.
If games have players that don't seem to wanna RP much, that's fine. Doesn't mean they're flawed or not "well-balanced" for it. Just don't play at that table next time, problem solved.
If you want a heavily RP focused experience, one shots are not the place for it. Find yourself a group of friends who are willing to go through a continuous campaign. That was how I started playing DnD, and it was a beautiful thing I will always cherish due to how rich the world was built , and the bonds that were formed, broken, and reforged throughout the sessions until we finished. I loved the RP. But I also love AL's focus on combat, and it's brisk pace of getting to the point. Both are fantastic, but one isn't imbalanced for not being like this way or that way.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
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Here are my experiences. First ever session was back in the 80s. None of us were sure what to expect or how to play. We learned as we went along and it was fun. Then college, work and family got in the way and I stopped playing.
Fast forward to four years ago when my adult daughter got into playing. She introduced me to CR which introduced me to 5e. Her group of 20 somethings was willing to let me play with them (I'm in my 50s). My first session was outstanding. The DM was welcoming and more than willing to get me up to speed. We play online as not everyone is in the same city. I also run a game for my daughter and her fiancé so we can roll dice at the table. Her fiancé has DM'd a game or two but they are in college so he can't do it on a regular basis.
I've played one pick up game. The DM was welcoming and we used pre-made characters. It wasn't a one shot just a modified session of a campaign they were already playing to help give new players a taste of the game. The DM was really trying hard to give beginners a good experience and teach them. It's hard when there are that many players (there were 10 of us). Not much RP but it was a game to teach newbies how to play and the hardest part of the game for beginners tends to be combat.
I can definitely see why your first experience was not enjoyable for you and hope you eventually find a group that meets your needs.
I guess my first game could be split up into my 3 phases of playing D&D and each being very different from the others…
Phase 1 - late 90s for a few months, and I was in my early 20’s. At Uni one of my flat mates invited me to join a game of 2nd edition D&D. It was an established group and I played a pre-made character. The group was heavy RP and I felt a bit awkward fitting in. Their was some combat and I had to figure out how THAC0 worked lol.
Phase 2 - early 2000’s to mid 2000’s (I’m in my early/mid 30’s) me and my local Friends (all tabletop gamers - heavy into Warhammer and Magic the gathering) thought it would be great to try out 3rd edition. One of my friends DMd and it was a blast. Not much RP, but a couple of us tried. Very tactical focus and most of us tried to game the level ups. A year or so later I DMd my first game, and created a campaign from scratch. I was more interested in RP by then, but they wasn’t. It didn’t go too well, until the action started.
Phase 3 - (now mid 40’s) last year I took the lead again and got my group of friends back into D&D I’m the groups DM. Most of us have careers and family responsibilities so it’s hard to schedule anything more than once every 2 months, but we make the effort. I’ve gone with a premade campaign, as I don’t have time to do one from scratch. But I’m still keen to encourage RP, and RP each NPC. But I’ve got a lot more confident and do a lot of presentations in my job, so putting on a voice for my friends is super easy for me now. At the same time I know my friends who are ‘now’ a mix of RP comfortable and some combat heavy PC gamers, so tailor my sessions to suit. I’m also DM for my Daughter now (just the two of us).
I’d love to play again (online) as a character (I’ve got so many ideas and voices lol) but would need a very understanding group (could prob do 1 session a month at best), but I’ve sort of resigned to being a DM for the time being.
Each different experiences and each I had different expectations. I think I learned good lessons from my previous two starts, which helped me be a good (I hope) DM now.
If I could say one thing just to you, it would be Stick with it, it’s worth it in the end. might take sometime but that group you want will happen somehow.
Ok I will say that over 20+ years of playing TTRPG's I have played in and GM'd many many groups who do little to no actual RP as you see it done on streaming sites. Many will play in the 3rd person, describing only things very relevant to what is happening in scene, many never RP chit chat round a fire for instance.
This is not to say you should not feel disheartened, there is plenty you have described that sends up red flags for this group, but please don't set roleplay expectations as high as the like of critical roll, in 20+ years of playing and DMing with probably about 80 people in total probably only 8 of them played the game in that way when it came to RP, and they where unique because they where all drama students.
My current campaign is a great example, we have great fun but in a 3 hour session the players may talk in character a handful of times if that, largely they will describe what they are doing or tell me what they want to say. They will also just tell each other information about themselves that they will have shared as and when it is relevant, they will not have those deep meaningful conversations in game about parents, or where they come from.
OP, I read some of the above posts but not all of them and I hope my comments below might offer some help.
1) There are many ways to play D&D and RPG's in general, from computer game, battle to battel and to the other extreme of all actors. It can be tough to find a group that matches your play style. So I recommend you ask questions (if possible) to see what the game is like and how they play.
2) Often I have seen if you play in a public space it needs to be open to the public. So if the group meets at the library it needs to be open to people even if the group may not be. Also it sounds like to me from your description and my ability to guess about what happened that the GM did not really expect other people to show up and or was prepared for it.
3) All GM's and players are not professionals in writing, directing, acting, running the game and or playing the game. So I would expect your experience to be different from most stream's you would see. It might be as extreme a difference as a professional play and a kindergarten play in quality and or your expiations.
4) Often games that focus on new players focus on the rules and how they work so that leaves less time for RP (again RP time varies a lot from group to group). But as you move on from intro games often RP time can increase in the overall time.
5) One thing that opened up my mind as to the vastly different styles and games was to go to a game convention (not net back then or at least not a civilian net) and play in and try out a lot of games. But you need the time to go, access to such an event and keep an open mind as to what you may experience and if that experience is the only way the game can be run and or played.
I had never played D&D and really wanted to give it a shot. So, I bought the Essentials Kit and put a flyer up at work looking for players. I'm not the best DM by any stretch, but it's been over 2 years since we started, and I have a great group of three players. Some other folks have come and gone, and one young lady comes back at the end of each story arc to spice things up. It's been great.
So, I'm sorry your first session went so poorly. But yeah, randos are often gonna be that way. Done give up!
The first time I played was in the 70s. We didn't really know what we were doing so I created an AD&D character, but the module was Keep on the Borderlands. There was no RP that I remember, mostly just sneaking around and fighting.
Had a great time even though I got eaten by the Owlbear.
"Sooner or later, your Players are going to smash your railroad into a sandbox."
-Vedexent
"real life is a super high CR."
-OboeLauren
"............anybody got any potatoes? We could drop a potato in each hole an' see which ones get viciously mauled by horrible monsters?"
-Ilyara Thundertale
Well-balanced? Sounds like a loaded term.
I play a lot of adventures league, where you can carry over character progression over a series of disconnected oneshots. This sounds like what you played, but it should be noted that there's nothing wrong with playing a game centered more around combat.
On such games, time restrictions have to be accounted for. Giving the players a complete experience within a set amount of time means that some aspects must be sacrificed. Sure, I've played with some amazing DMs who put in the work and give an amazing RP experience with lots of character/npc interaction and dialogue. But, there are also DMs who can't, and they're no lesser for it. We as players should be grateful.
If games have players that don't seem to wanna RP much, that's fine. Doesn't mean they're flawed or not "well-balanced" for it. Just don't play at that table next time, problem solved.
If you want a heavily RP focused experience, one shots are not the place for it. Find yourself a group of friends who are willing to go through a continuous campaign. That was how I started playing DnD, and it was a beautiful thing I will always cherish due to how rich the world was built , and the bonds that were formed, broken, and reforged throughout the sessions until we finished. I loved the RP. But I also love AL's focus on combat, and it's brisk pace of getting to the point. Both are fantastic, but one isn't imbalanced for not being like this way or that way.