For backround, I have a party of 6 that I DM on Fridays, 2 of these 6 were invited in past months, they were both good fits. They are not the problem, one of my players, who invited one of the 2 mentioned earlier, has been a huge problem. They asked to add 1 of the 2 new players and I let them in, and now they come to sessions and are that one player that dosen't give a crap about D&D and ends the session halfway through by saying "We should take a short break", they are actively annoying and it's getting to some of my other, more focused players.
The players I like are great, they have the attention span of the average pebble, but they care about D&D and aren't a problem, what should I do? I don't want to nessairly ban them, but want them to stop. (They wouldn't play when I told them to stop looking at their phone during combat out of anger) so they dont take critisism well. This is getting long, so if anyone who has had a similar experience with a player, please help.
The only way to solve these problems is to talk to them about it. Be honest. They might think because people like to keep it light and joke around at the table, that that means the game doesn't matter to anyone. Let them know it matters to you, and that it hurts your feelings and makes you feel disrespected when they act this way.
Then listen to what they have to say. Engage with them on their level and try to talk your way into an understanding. You don't need to bring the whole group into it, just have a frank, open discussion as adults.
Basically the worst thing you could do is try to "punish" the player's character in-game to try and solve the issue. Not only is it petty, but the player might not even have realized what they're doing wrong and might just think you're picking on them for no reason, causing animosity that can keep you from resolving the situation even after you clear the air on why.
I agree with Charles on this one. You don't want to take over-the-table bs into the game. Problem players are always going to be there and you should first talk to them privately and put the decision to continue to act like a solo brat or a part of a team of players. The responsibility of the players' attitude is on them, not you. Your job as the DM is to run the game and maximize the number of players having fun. Unfortunately that just means you have to excuse some players from your table.
Remember, you can always roll up some hirelings to support your remaining players until you find replacements. I would also set the ground rule that as the DM, its always "your table, your rules" and unless the entire party wants to take a break, you shouldn't allow a single player to derail everything. Suggest they excuse themselves and return when they have completed their short break, its on them to stay or go at that point.
I agree with Charles on this one. You don't want to take over-the-table bs into the game. Problem players are always going to be there and you should first talk to them privately and put the decision to continue to act like a solo brat or a part of a team of players. The responsibility of the players' attitude is on them, not you. Your job as the DM is to run the game and maximize the number of players having fun. Unfortunately that just means you have to excuse some players from your table.
Remember, you can always roll up some hirelings to support your remaining players until you find replacements. I would also set the ground rule that as the DM, its always "your table, your rules" and unless the entire party wants to take a break, you shouldn't allow a single player to derail everything. Suggest they excuse themselves and return when they have completed their short break, its on them to stay or go at that point.
Actually kicking them out of the game is quite drastic, but if you can't come to an understanding, then it is something you'll wanna consider. No dnd is better than bad dnd.
Gonna give the same advice I always give for any inter-group problems; talk to your players. In this case I'd say you need to arrange a 1-on-1 chat (doesn't have to be in person, unless you think that's best) with the problem player and talk about your concerns. When you describe the problem, frame it with "I" statements. Don't say, for example, "You are being disruptive, and you need to stop", instead say "I feel like every time we take a 'short break', the session ends early. Have you noticed that?" or "I've been having a hard time keeping the game on track, and I think our frequent digression are part of the problem." See what they have to say about it.
I'm going to be honest with you; it does not sound like this player is having fun with your game. I have never played in a game where I was simultaneously having fun and also on my phone during combat, or constantly disrupting play. I don't think a lot of people come to game nights intending to be annoying, but I think a lot of people are prone to act out when they're spending a long time at a table not having fun. Try to be open with them and see how they view their own actions; maybe they think they're providing welcome comic relief, or maybe they think the sessions drag on too long. These may or may not be disagreements you can reconcile, but at least you'll have a clear understanding of what's going on in their head.
In any case, I wish you the best of luck. This is a thorny issue, but you're doing the right thing by confronting it.
For backround, I have a party of 6 that I DM on Fridays, 2 of these 6 were invited in past months, they were both good fits. They are not the problem, one of my players, who invited one of the 2 mentioned earlier, has been a huge problem. They asked to add 1 of the 2 new players and I let them in, and now they come to sessions and are that one player that dosen't give a crap about D&D and ends the session halfway through by saying "We should take a short break", they are actively annoying and it's getting to some of my other, more focused players.
The players I like are great, they have the attention span of the average pebble, but they care about D&D and aren't a problem, what should I do? I don't want to nessairly ban them, but want them to stop. (They wouldn't play when I told them to stop looking at their phone during combat out of anger) so they dont take critisism well. This is getting long, so if anyone who has had a similar experience with a player, please help.
The only way to solve these problems is to talk to them about it. Be honest. They might think because people like to keep it light and joke around at the table, that that means the game doesn't matter to anyone. Let them know it matters to you, and that it hurts your feelings and makes you feel disrespected when they act this way.
Then listen to what they have to say. Engage with them on their level and try to talk your way into an understanding. You don't need to bring the whole group into it, just have a frank, open discussion as adults.
Basically the worst thing you could do is try to "punish" the player's character in-game to try and solve the issue. Not only is it petty, but the player might not even have realized what they're doing wrong and might just think you're picking on them for no reason, causing animosity that can keep you from resolving the situation even after you clear the air on why.
I agree with Charles on this one. You don't want to take over-the-table bs into the game. Problem players are always going to be there and you should first talk to them privately and put the decision to continue to act like a solo brat or a part of a team of players. The responsibility of the players' attitude is on them, not you. Your job as the DM is to run the game and maximize the number of players having fun. Unfortunately that just means you have to excuse some players from your table.
Remember, you can always roll up some hirelings to support your remaining players until you find replacements. I would also set the ground rule that as the DM, its always "your table, your rules" and unless the entire party wants to take a break, you shouldn't allow a single player to derail everything. Suggest they excuse themselves and return when they have completed their short break, its on them to stay or go at that point.
Actually kicking them out of the game is quite drastic, but if you can't come to an understanding, then it is something you'll wanna consider. No dnd is better than bad dnd.
Gonna give the same advice I always give for any inter-group problems; talk to your players. In this case I'd say you need to arrange a 1-on-1 chat (doesn't have to be in person, unless you think that's best) with the problem player and talk about your concerns. When you describe the problem, frame it with "I" statements. Don't say, for example, "You are being disruptive, and you need to stop", instead say "I feel like every time we take a 'short break', the session ends early. Have you noticed that?" or "I've been having a hard time keeping the game on track, and I think our frequent digression are part of the problem." See what they have to say about it.
I'm going to be honest with you; it does not sound like this player is having fun with your game. I have never played in a game where I was simultaneously having fun and also on my phone during combat, or constantly disrupting play. I don't think a lot of people come to game nights intending to be annoying, but I think a lot of people are prone to act out when they're spending a long time at a table not having fun. Try to be open with them and see how they view their own actions; maybe they think they're providing welcome comic relief, or maybe they think the sessions drag on too long. These may or may not be disagreements you can reconcile, but at least you'll have a clear understanding of what's going on in their head.
In any case, I wish you the best of luck. This is a thorny issue, but you're doing the right thing by confronting it.