Any links to this lore that is 5E approved? Some have mention this from other fiction. Last time I worried about the Fey Court only 

• Be wary of accepting a gift from the fey.
• Don't consume the food or drink of the Feywild.
• Never tell a fey your full name.
• Use your manners. And the last two were only recent stuff which I stole from other authors. 

This is a really awesome and useful thread. Thank you.

I think that making them seem like "a different culture with different, more wild rules" involves making rules that seem like they could make sense and be plausible on their own, one Fey to another Fey. For example, I think "Don't accept a gift from the fey" is something that wouldn't really matter or be important to them in their own place, while "Always accept a gift from the Fey" would be more interesting (and also introduce more opportunities for interesting game moments).

I think that having things that depend on interactions between the Fey and the players is nice to an extent, since that gives them that particular fairy tale feel, but making them feel like living beings with a culture could have more rules that make them feel like they still live their own lives.

Quote from Swadloom >>

I think that making them seem like "a different culture with different, more wild rules" involves making rules that seem like they could make sense and be plausible on their own, one Fey to another Fey. For example, I think "Don't accept a gift from the fey" is something that wouldn't really matter or be important to them in their own place, while "Always accept a gift from the Fey" would be more interesting (and also introduce more opportunities for interesting game moments).

I think that having things that depend on interactions between the Fey and the players is nice to an extent, since that gives them that particular fairy tail feel, but making them feel like living beings with a culture could have more rules that make them feel like they still live their own lives.

Being that I have already included elements of the feywild in my own homebrew campaign, I can appreciate this point of view! Especially because, as it turned out, a player came to the table with what else, but a Warlock with a fey patron (and that really did fit into the campaign beautifully!). Thus, giving the fey social rules that pertained to fey culture, rather than just "here's a rule sheet for non-fey to follow in the feywild" actually gave answers for ANY question that arose among party members when they visited the FW, including the adventurer who had backstory connections there. 

Btw--I do love the "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Feywild" rules list! :) Thanks for sharing, I'm going to reference it in future campaign creating. 

This has been an interesting thread and I like much of what folks have shared.

I don’t personally have a lot to add except perhaps a recommendation. If one is considering running a campaign with a strong feywild presence/theme, I suggest you might enjoy reading the book ‘The Fairy Faith in Celtic Counties’ by W.Y. Evans-Wentz. It is a collection of traditions and testimonies based in Wales, Ireland, Scotland, and Brittany. While it is not really a ‘casual’ read, the collection is quite fascinating and can provide a trove of inspiration for playing or incorporating fey into ones game.

Then you don't have it anymore

A very useful thread as I work on fleshing out the Feywild in my own campaign. One thing that caught my attention was that all the Fey rules are really those of pre civilization Hunter gatherer bands. They don’t “buy and sell” they exchange goods of value (barter), lying, stealing and cheating, especially within your own band are grounds for ostracizing the guilty as it hurts the entire community. Many goods are owned by the group and may be used by any member but must be put back when done, etc then you add in magic that actually works, and long/eternal lives in which to gather resources and “power” or status and you get the archfey and all the variations. Reading thru Tasha’s comments and the Wild beyond the witch light volume should help to get a sense of how the Feywild works.

Quote from EricHVela >>

Do you know of Calvinball?

The basic rules of the game are that you never play by the same rules twice, you always make up a new rule to counter a previous rule due to some new technicality never encountered prior, points are judged by abstract and inequitable values...or collection of virtual things, everyone is expected to know the rules—even the ones not yet invented, and everyone has fun.

I expect Fey society to be something along those lines. 🤷‍♂️

EDIT: The only consistent rule in Calvinball is that all players wear a mask... quite appropriate to the Fey if one asked me.

 I love this. <3 Calvin and Hobbes.

I am working on a "soft" variation of the mysterious feywilde culture.

If you give a Fey your name, they always know where you are if they say your name.

They are wary of the dwellers of the Material Plane, but also very curious to find someone they can learn from.  So while guarding their anonymity, they still seek to establish friendly relationships with those that live in the Fringe, the border lands between the feywilde and the Material Plane.

Dancing with Fey in their land does allow them to charm you, but unlike a regular charm spell you don't know you were charmed, you just wake up a bit dazed.

Quote from Ihsan997 >>

Quote from DemigirlDemigod568 >>

It is said that Fey customs/etiquette is weird and hard to keep up with. So when running into Fey or going to the Feywild there is a general set of rules you see with some variation: 

• Don't accept a gift from the fey.
• Don't consume the food or drink of the Feywild.
• Never dance with a fey.
• Never tell a fey your full name.
• Never stray from a path in the Feywild.
• Use your manners, but don't say "thank you" (or you owe them)
• Don't give a Fey (cheap) clothing
• Always keep your word.
• Don't repay more than you borrowed.

My issue with this is that only the last 3 or 4 are really showing of a different culture with different, more wild rules.

 

I’m actually curious - what happens if you tell a fey your full name?

 It is a good idea to never reveal your full given legal name. There is a spell that is used on demons and devils that requires the knowledge of said monster's full true name. With some spell research modification that spell could be used on any being short of a demigod? The spell is called Spiritwrack. 

My answer has been you have disadvantage against or automatically fail saves against their magic.

Do NOT name the Gentry! Naming them draws their attention and you do NOT want the Others (Fair Folk, etc.) to take an interest in you!

So trans people could harmlessly give their chosen names?

Quote from Aralia_AKA_GoogiddyBop >>

So trans people could harmlessly give their chosen names?

 Only if it's not the name that they feel describes them. Fey don't really care about laws.

Quote from Aralia_AKA_GoogiddyBop >>

So trans people could harmlessly give their chosen names?

 Yes. A trans person could give their birth name and it would have no power over them cause it’s not the name they identify as.

Quote from Drowlord15 >>

Satyrs dance with people all the time, so I think you can get rid of that rule.

 Yes they dance but the stories never end well c:

Now with Wild Beyond the Witchlight it actually tells you to do the opposite of the first rule with the Rule of Reciprocity.

Quote from Sparrow_of_Windhelm >>

Now with Wild Beyond the Witchlight it actually tells you to do the opposite of the first rule with the Rule of Reciprocity.

 Good point. Maybe the rules of hospitality vary depending on where in the Feywild you are or which Domain of Delight you’re in.

I'm playing a Fairy character for a campaign of my friend's. How would these rules work in that setting? Especially the 'true name' thing. Someone mentioned being able to place curses/hexes/the like on people you know the true name of, but how would that work in practice? What if you don't have any spells that would enable you to do those things? I'm playing an artificer, so most of my spells are more of the practical type.