first off, thank you for taking a moment to read this. it's my first post :D
i do not know if i'm posting this in the right place.... but...
That being said. out of everyone i know i've got the most experience with D&D, and i know a few others that wanted to play for a while. I've volunteered to be the DM and do a campaign.
we'll be doing it online, as not everyone will be able to meet up. (putting what i have heard about D&D Beyond's online abilities to the test) My biggest problem is one of the people who is joining, has had a bad experience playing D&D before... well not bad but a negative one. the last time she played she said it was nerve wrecking and boring. I feel i have to work harder to make this campaign fun and exciting for her and the others. I've been buying source books and reading the Tips for DMing. I'm still scratching my head. I'm not sure if i'm good enough to do this.
anyone have any tips, or examples of their first time they can share to help calm my nerves?
Honestly, the biggest advice I can think to give is to manage everyone's expectations, yourself included. No one sits down behind the screen for the first time and starts running a campaign on the tier of something like Critical Role or one of the other big streamed campaigns. Start simple and build from there, don't try and plan out the next great fantasy novel as your campaign plot. Nerve-wracking shouldn't be hard to avoid like that and- frankly- if someone starts agitating that their first-time DM is boring that's a bit of a flag for a munchkin or MC-syndrome player.
Just jump in, have fun and do your best; as the old adage goes yo can't please them all but with D&D, IMHO everyone should be looking to meet in the "middle" so swing for the fence and hope for the best!! as with any relationship communication is the most important component so focus on that first and if things go south offer the dungeon master hat to anyone that thinks they can do a better job. Just remember it is a game and it is supposed to be fun, if you are not having fun then this group/table may not be the right table for you and just move on, no sense in sitting/playing D&D at a table that you are not having fun at or if it is an individual that doesn't fit the rest of the table politely send them on their way to find the right table for them!
TLDR not every table is right for every player, but there is a table for every player. That is the greatest thing about D&D, you just have to find the right table, you do not have to "fit in" with a table you are not compatible with anymore than that table "has" to accommodate you fitting in with regardless of why it doesn't fit.
That is what makes this game so awesome!
Best of luck and high rolls for your future!
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
CENSORSHIP IS THE TOOL OF COWARDS and WANNA BE TYRANTS.
For tips, don't be afraid of tropes. You don't need to "break expectations" to have a good time. Let the party meet in a tavern. Let the goblins be evil little *poops.* Have them clear out some rats. No worries. There's no need to have some grand tragic backstory to a BBEG in the midst of an intense sociopolitical drama.
And be willing to have meta "Hey, I'm trying to figure out what to do here." conversations. If the players do something you were not expecting it can add to enjoyment for them if you're saying, "Okay, guys, I'm gonna need a moment to think because I was not expecting that." And if you have to come up with an on-the-fly name for an NPC it's okay to be cheesy.
Also, feel free to have a chat of, "Hey, guys, what did you like about the session? What were things you felt were weaker?" Get a collaborative input on what the group likes.
As for online tools, I really like Owlbear Rodeo for battlemaps. It's free and simple. But your group might find something else you like.
Are you running a published adventure or doing a homebrew one?
I'd recommend a published one to take the stress off with "making it interesting" or "having a good story". All you need to worry about is adapting the adventure to what's happening.
If you do homebrew, don't go grand. Start off simple. They're in a tavern and have them go rescue a farmer from some goblins or something. Then see what happens, and react to it. Maybe they're interested in why the goblins attacked the farm,.or why they took a prisoner. Maybe they're more interested in the farmer and who they are - or why they were targeted. Have some interesting answers for these, and when they pull on the threads, develop future sessions to explore them. For example, they might be super interested in the farmer, and it turns out that he's actually a robber and managed to rob the royal train, and the goblins heard about the goblins heard about it (hence the attack to get the treasure). Intrigue follows from there.
Be aware that you're not the source of the fun, the players are. For a beginner DM, I'd say around 80-90% of the fun (depending on the group size) doesn't come from the DM, but from the players interacting with each other and getting up to shenanigans. The DM just provides a setting and a prompt or two for the other 10-20%. Even as you get more experienced, that percentage doesn't really shift - in my games, I'd say that I provide maybe 40% even on a strong session (I have a very large group at the moment, so more realistically it's closer to 30%). An outsized contribution to be sure, but not the defining one.
Which is how the homebrew set up I laid out earlier works. You let them tell the story - either through what leads they chase up, or by the consequences of their shenanigans. Perhaps they fell a tree to create a barricade to defend against the goblins. Except the tree belonged to a neighbour and was their favourite tree, causing animosity which develops into a rivalry. Recognise that it's mostly their story, so let them tell it. Just provide interesting twists and developments.
Also recognise that players are people. Why did she find it nerve wracking and boring? Perhaps you can solve that. Also be prepared for the fact that you might not. It's possible that the DM or other players were causing problems or aggravating the issue. It's also possible that she doesn't deal well with tension and the probabilistic nature of rolling dice or that she just finds roleplaying games boring.
And that's fine. I get anxious with PvP games and don't like the feeling I get when playing them...so I don't play them. I find American football boring...so I don't watch or play it. That's fine. See if you can resolve the issues or help abrogate them, but also accept that D&D might not be for her. See what you can do, then let her make her decisions.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
If you're not willing or able to to discuss in good faith, then don't be surprised if I don't respond, there are better things in life for me to do than humour you. This signature is that response.
“Nerve-wracking and boring”? Strange. I would consider the former a form of excitement. While I would certainly care about this person’s experience, I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Having said that, it might not hurt to have her elaborate more, unless she already has and you are just giving us the short version out of respect for privacy.
Was giving the short-short version of her experience. She said she was willing to give it another try with me and if she still doesn't feel like it was for her, she asked if she could leave. I told her she could. I would just have her character killed off or something like that.
I'm sure she'll have a good time this time around, o really want to show her the funner and outrageous side of D&D campaigns. But I'll do my best not to get hooked on that.
I'm doing the Dragon of Ice spire peak. That seems like it'll be a good starter.
You're right I shouldn't be trying to provide all the entertainment. I should leave it to them just provide the setting. And let them have the freedom to explore and create the fun.
I know that D&D isn't for anyone, but I don't want someone say it's not for them because the people they played with last time didn't make it any fun. All I can do is my best.
For tips, don't be afraid of tropes. You don't need to "break expectations" to have a good time. Let the party meet in a tavern. Let the goblins be evil little *poops.* Have them clear out some rats. No worries. There's no need to have some grand tragic backstory to a BBEG in the midst of an intense sociopolitical drama.
And be willing to have meta "Hey, I'm trying to figure out what to do here." conversations. If the players do something you were not expecting it can add to enjoyment for them if you're saying, "Okay, guys, I'm gonna need a moment to think because I was not expecting that." And if you have to come up with an on-the-fly name for an NPC it's okay to be cheesy.
Also, feel free to have a chat of, "Hey, guys, what did you like about the session? What were things you felt were weaker?" Get a collaborative input on what the group likes.
As for online tools, I really like Owlbear Rodeo for battlemaps. It's free and simple. But your group might find something else you like.
Good advice, I will ask them about that after each session.
I've also made a small encounter to introduce a character I made, to help the party in combat or to help bring them back on track to do the adventure.
Honestly, the biggest advice I can think to give is to manage everyone's expectations, yourself included. No one sits down behind the screen for the first time and starts running a campaign on the tier of something like Critical Role or one of the other big streamed campaigns. Start simple and build from there, don't try and plan out the next great fantasy novel as your campaign plot. Nerve-wracking shouldn't be hard to avoid like that and- frankly- if someone starts agitating that their first-time DM is boring that's a bit of a flag for a munchkin or MC-syndrome player.
You are right.. I need to take a step back and a deep breath. And work on what I control. And let them just explore
One of the most important things is pacing, don't get bogged down in looking things up. Just let them know that you're going to make the best decision you can without slowing the game down, and you'll look up rules around things that come up - later so you can improve without making the game move so slow its boring. Try to keep the action moving - and pay attention to what kinds of things the players are enjoying, so you can try to give them more of that.
I'm doing the Dragon of Ice spire peak. That seems like it'll be a good starter.
You're right I shouldn't be trying to provide all the entertainment. I should leave it to them just provide the setting. And let them have the freedom to explore and create the fun.
I know that D&D isn't for anyone, but I don't want someone say it's not for them because the people they played with last time didn't make it any fun. All I can do is my best.
DoIP is awesome for a starter DM. It was my first I did (I DMed for my first campaign...I've yet to complete a campaign as a player!). In some ways it's my favourite. Consider doing Storm Lord's Wrath, Sleeping Dragon's Wake and Divine Contention as follow ups. They're not quite as good, but take the story a little further and give a nice full campaign.
And yeah, the advice about D&D being for everyone was for you, not them. Which is to say that you're not responsible for them liking D&D or not - do what you can, but don't assume responsibility for it. Try to make it fun, but if they don't like it, then it's not your fault or problem.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
If you're not willing or able to to discuss in good faith, then don't be surprised if I don't respond, there are better things in life for me to do than humour you. This signature is that response.
As a beginning DM you want to make things simple for yourself so you can keep things moving and fun for others so A) as others have said start with a published low level campaign DoIP is great. B) start at L1 ( I know your doing that with DoIP but…) this simplifies the characters and equipment adjustments you would have to deal with with higher level PCs. C) spend time on character creation - backgrounds, motivations obviously, but also familiarization with actions, spells equipment so your players know what to do and how on the DDB online sheets. This is not time wasted as the mechanics can slow down a game and frustrate folks that are still learning how to do things. I suspect that was part of the young lady’s “ nerve wracking and boring” . We have two players at my table that are still getting comfortable with the DDB tools, luckily the rest of us are competent to expert and have no problem giving them help and explaining/ suggesting things to do. D) do your “homework” - make sure you know how to use the campaign and encounter tools (took me a while when I first started Useing them). Make sure you have read thru the section of the module your going to run that day and are familiar with the monsters, traps etc and are prepared when the party “goes off track” (they will😁). E) use a notebook ( or verbal log on your phone) for notes of stuff to check on afterwards or want to do a better job of next time. It’s amazing how quickly we forget this stuff if not noted down somehow. F) relax and have fun - yes you’ll make mistakes - we all do.
That’s good at least. I hope it turns out well for her and everyone else. My only other suggestion would be not to necessarily kill her off but write her out of the story in some other way. Personally, it would leave a bad taste in my mouth if I knew that was my character’s fate without a fight. Then again, if she really doesn’t end up caring or actually wants that obviously that’s an option.
As a beginning DM you want to make things simple for yourself so you can keep things moving and fun for others so A) as others have said start with a published low level campaign DoIP is great. B) start at L1 ( I know your doing that with DoIP but…) this simplifies the characters and equipment adjustments you would have to deal with with higher level PCs. C) spend time on character creation - backgrounds, motivations obviously, but also familiarization with actions, spells equipment so your players know what to do and how on the DDB online sheets. This is not time wasted as the mechanics can slow down a game and frustrate folks that are still learning how to do things. I suspect that was part of the young lady’s “ nerve wracking and boring” . We have two players at my table that are still getting comfortable with the DDB tools, luckily the rest of us are competent to expert and have no problem giving them help and explaining/ suggesting things to do. D) do your “homework” - make sure you know how to use the campaign and encounter tools (took me a while when I first started Useing them). Make sure you have read thru the section of the module your going to run that day and are familiar with the monsters, traps etc and are prepared when the party “goes off track” (they will😁). E) use a notebook ( or verbal log on your phone) for notes of stuff to check on afterwards or want to do a better job of next time. It’s amazing how quickly we forget this stuff if not noted down somehow. F) relax and have fun - yes you’ll make mistakes - we all do.
i'll start reading and working on backup plans.
i'll be leaning on all of you guys for support,
If i have any questions that i can't find an answer in the books or in the forums, i'll be sure to make a new thread about it. hope you guys will be able to help.
That’s good at least. I hope it turns out well for her and everyone else. My only other suggestion would be not to necessarily kill her off but write her out of the story in some other way. Personally, it would leave a bad taste in my mouth if I knew that was my character’s fate without a fight. Then again, if she really doesn’t end up caring or actually wants that obviously that’s an option.
ah... good idea, i won't kill the character off. i'll think of something to use as a reason that character is no longer with the party. maybe a letter from a dying family member will do.
would I be able to do that over D&D Beyond? i mean would i be able to see the character sheet?
If you're the DM you can see all the player character sheets in your campaign, full details. If the player does decide to leave there's an option for them to unassign their character, basically they say they no longer want it and it can sit there in the campaign and be claimed by you or another player (also a handy feature if you ever need to create pregenerated characters for new players)
would I be able to do that over D&D Beyond? i mean would i be able to see the character sheet?
If you're the DM you can see all the player character sheets in your campaign, full details. If the player does decide to leave there's an option for them to unassign their character, basically they say they no longer want it and it can sit there in the campaign and be claimed by you or another player (also a handy feature if you ever need to create pregenerated characters for new players)
oh, that's a helpful feature
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Hello everyone,
first off, thank you for taking a moment to read this. it's my first post :D
i do not know if i'm posting this in the right place.... but...
That being said. out of everyone i know i've got the most experience with D&D, and i know a few others that wanted to play for a while. I've volunteered to be the DM and do a campaign.
we'll be doing it online, as not everyone will be able to meet up. (putting what i have heard about D&D Beyond's online abilities to the test) My biggest problem is one of the people who is joining, has had a bad experience playing D&D before... well not bad but a negative one. the last time she played she said it was nerve wrecking and boring. I feel i have to work harder to make this campaign fun and exciting for her and the others. I've been buying source books and reading the Tips for DMing. I'm still scratching my head. I'm not sure if i'm good enough to do this.
anyone have any tips, or examples of their first time they can share to help calm my nerves?
Honestly, the biggest advice I can think to give is to manage everyone's expectations, yourself included. No one sits down behind the screen for the first time and starts running a campaign on the tier of something like Critical Role or one of the other big streamed campaigns. Start simple and build from there, don't try and plan out the next great fantasy novel as your campaign plot. Nerve-wracking shouldn't be hard to avoid like that and- frankly- if someone starts agitating that their first-time DM is boring that's a bit of a flag for a munchkin or MC-syndrome player.
Just jump in, have fun and do your best; as the old adage goes yo can't please them all but with D&D, IMHO everyone should be looking to meet in the "middle" so swing for the fence and hope for the best!! as with any relationship communication is the most important component so focus on that first and if things go south offer the dungeon master hat to anyone that thinks they can do a better job. Just remember it is a game and it is supposed to be fun, if you are not having fun then this group/table may not be the right table for you and just move on, no sense in sitting/playing D&D at a table that you are not having fun at or if it is an individual that doesn't fit the rest of the table politely send them on their way to find the right table for them!
TLDR not every table is right for every player, but there is a table for every player. That is the greatest thing about D&D, you just have to find the right table, you do not have to "fit in" with a table you are not compatible with anymore than that table "has" to accommodate you fitting in with regardless of why it doesn't fit.
That is what makes this game so awesome!
Best of luck and high rolls for your future!
CENSORSHIP IS THE TOOL OF COWARDS and WANNA BE TYRANTS.
For tips, don't be afraid of tropes. You don't need to "break expectations" to have a good time. Let the party meet in a tavern. Let the goblins be evil little *poops.* Have them clear out some rats. No worries. There's no need to have some grand tragic backstory to a BBEG in the midst of an intense sociopolitical drama.
And be willing to have meta "Hey, I'm trying to figure out what to do here." conversations. If the players do something you were not expecting it can add to enjoyment for them if you're saying, "Okay, guys, I'm gonna need a moment to think because I was not expecting that." And if you have to come up with an on-the-fly name for an NPC it's okay to be cheesy.
Also, feel free to have a chat of, "Hey, guys, what did you like about the session? What were things you felt were weaker?" Get a collaborative input on what the group likes.
As for online tools, I really like Owlbear Rodeo for battlemaps. It's free and simple. But your group might find something else you like.
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Are you running a published adventure or doing a homebrew one?
I'd recommend a published one to take the stress off with "making it interesting" or "having a good story". All you need to worry about is adapting the adventure to what's happening.
If you do homebrew, don't go grand. Start off simple. They're in a tavern and have them go rescue a farmer from some goblins or something. Then see what happens, and react to it. Maybe they're interested in why the goblins attacked the farm,.or why they took a prisoner. Maybe they're more interested in the farmer and who they are - or why they were targeted. Have some interesting answers for these, and when they pull on the threads, develop future sessions to explore them. For example, they might be super interested in the farmer, and it turns out that he's actually a robber and managed to rob the royal train, and the goblins heard about the goblins heard about it (hence the attack to get the treasure). Intrigue follows from there.
Be aware that you're not the source of the fun, the players are. For a beginner DM, I'd say around 80-90% of the fun (depending on the group size) doesn't come from the DM, but from the players interacting with each other and getting up to shenanigans. The DM just provides a setting and a prompt or two for the other 10-20%. Even as you get more experienced, that percentage doesn't really shift - in my games, I'd say that I provide maybe 40% even on a strong session (I have a very large group at the moment, so more realistically it's closer to 30%). An outsized contribution to be sure, but not the defining one.
Which is how the homebrew set up I laid out earlier works. You let them tell the story - either through what leads they chase up, or by the consequences of their shenanigans. Perhaps they fell a tree to create a barricade to defend against the goblins. Except the tree belonged to a neighbour and was their favourite tree, causing animosity which develops into a rivalry. Recognise that it's mostly their story, so let them tell it. Just provide interesting twists and developments.
Also recognise that players are people. Why did she find it nerve wracking and boring? Perhaps you can solve that. Also be prepared for the fact that you might not. It's possible that the DM or other players were causing problems or aggravating the issue. It's also possible that she doesn't deal well with tension and the probabilistic nature of rolling dice or that she just finds roleplaying games boring.
And that's fine. I get anxious with PvP games and don't like the feeling I get when playing them...so I don't play them. I find American football boring...so I don't watch or play it. That's fine. See if you can resolve the issues or help abrogate them, but also accept that D&D might not be for her. See what you can do, then let her make her decisions.
If you're not willing or able to to discuss in good faith, then don't be surprised if I don't respond, there are better things in life for me to do than humour you. This signature is that response.
“Nerve-wracking and boring”? Strange. I would consider the former a form of excitement. While I would certainly care about this person’s experience, I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Having said that, it might not hurt to have her elaborate more, unless she already has and you are just giving us the short version out of respect for privacy.
@Actionsparda
Was giving the short-short version of her experience. She said she was willing to give it another try with me and if she still doesn't feel like it was for her, she asked if she could leave. I told her she could. I would just have her character killed off or something like that.
I'm sure she'll have a good time this time around, o really want to show her the funner and outrageous side of D&D campaigns. But I'll do my best not to get hooked on that.
@Linklite
I'm doing the Dragon of Ice spire peak. That seems like it'll be a good starter.
You're right I shouldn't be trying to provide all the entertainment. I should leave it to them just provide the setting. And let them have the freedom to explore and create the fun.
I know that D&D isn't for anyone, but I don't want someone say it's not for them because the people they played with last time didn't make it any fun. All I can do is my best.
Good advice, I will ask them about that after each session.
I've also made a small encounter to introduce a character I made, to help the party in combat or to help bring them back on track to do the adventure.
You are right.. I need to take a step back and a deep breath. And work on what I control. And let them just explore
One of the most important things is pacing, don't get bogged down in looking things up. Just let them know that you're going to make the best decision you can without slowing the game down, and you'll look up rules around things that come up - later so you can improve without making the game move so slow its boring. Try to keep the action moving - and pay attention to what kinds of things the players are enjoying, so you can try to give them more of that.
DoIP is awesome for a starter DM. It was my first I did (I DMed for my first campaign...I've yet to complete a campaign as a player!). In some ways it's my favourite. Consider doing Storm Lord's Wrath, Sleeping Dragon's Wake and Divine Contention as follow ups. They're not quite as good, but take the story a little further and give a nice full campaign.
And yeah, the advice about D&D being for everyone was for you, not them. Which is to say that you're not responsible for them liking D&D or not - do what you can, but don't assume responsibility for it. Try to make it fun, but if they don't like it, then it's not your fault or problem.
If you're not willing or able to to discuss in good faith, then don't be surprised if I don't respond, there are better things in life for me to do than humour you. This signature is that response.
As a beginning DM you want to make things simple for yourself so you can keep things moving and fun for others so
A) as others have said start with a published low level campaign DoIP is great.
B) start at L1 ( I know your doing that with DoIP but…) this simplifies the characters and equipment adjustments you would have to deal with with higher level PCs.
C) spend time on character creation - backgrounds, motivations obviously, but also familiarization with actions, spells equipment so your players know what to do and how on the DDB online sheets. This is not time wasted as the mechanics can slow down a game and frustrate folks that are still learning how to do things. I suspect that was part of the young lady’s “ nerve wracking and boring” . We have two players at my table that are still getting comfortable with the DDB tools, luckily the rest of us are competent to expert and have no problem giving them help and explaining/ suggesting things to do.
D) do your “homework” - make sure you know how to use the campaign and encounter tools (took me a while when I first started Useing them). Make sure you have read thru the section of the module your going to run that day and are familiar with the monsters, traps etc and are prepared when the party “goes off track” (they will😁).
E) use a notebook ( or verbal log on your phone) for notes of stuff to check on afterwards or want to do a better job of next time. It’s amazing how quickly we forget this stuff if not noted down somehow.
F) relax and have fun - yes you’ll make mistakes - we all do.
Wisea$$ DM and Player since 1979.
That’s good at least. I hope it turns out well for her and everyone else. My only other suggestion would be not to necessarily kill her off but write her out of the story in some other way. Personally, it would leave a bad taste in my mouth if I knew that was my character’s fate without a fight. Then again, if she really doesn’t end up caring or actually wants that obviously that’s an option.
i'll start reading and working on backup plans.
i'll be leaning on all of you guys for support,
If i have any questions that i can't find an answer in the books or in the forums, i'll be sure to make a new thread about it. hope you guys will be able to help.
thank you again
ah... good idea, i won't kill the character off. i'll think of something to use as a reason that character is no longer with the party. maybe a letter from a dying family member will do.
You can also change them to a party friendly NPC
would I be able to do that over D&D Beyond? i mean would i be able to see the character sheet?
If you're the DM you can see all the player character sheets in your campaign, full details. If the player does decide to leave there's an option for them to unassign their character, basically they say they no longer want it and it can sit there in the campaign and be claimed by you or another player (also a handy feature if you ever need to create pregenerated characters for new players)
oh, that's a helpful feature