I'm in a very specific situation and I'm trying to sort out what I can do, what I should do, and what I need to avoid. It's not a case entirely of my own creation so some of my "go to" solutions are just off the table.
Here's what we have: The DND group is through a private teen social/ mental health club. There is a membership fee that gets teens access to the club every afternoon/ evening. They have video games, board games, and weekly "Groups" that meet for creative writing, photography, and Dungeons and Dragons. The DND group is one that they have struggled to keep active not because of lack of interest, but because of lack of people to "run" it. There are two DnD groups a "serious" and a "not serious" group. The "not serious" is doing pretty well for itself as it's mostly one of the club counselors just being the referee in random character relationship drama. Last week, I'm lead to understand, was a custody battle over a pet slime two characters had adopted. I've been asked to take over the "Serious" DND group and I am compensated for my time.
Speaking of time, the group runs for just 2 hours, 6-8pm on Friday nights. I'm asked to be there for "set up and break down" half an hour before and after the sessions. Which is fine and I'm good with a little 3 hour window on my friday nights.
Of the kids who want to do the serious DND group there are some variations of interest, storytelling ability, and their own investment. One of the kids declares an attack action every time she can, and no amount of consequence seems to dissuade her. Contrast that with a young man who can quote every single rule in the books and who is unable to declare any action because he can imagine the 100000 ways that a DM can take any specific action and use it against the party. I have also had multiple conflicts already because the kids all have "their characters" they want to play and when I said "well I run games using the standard array, or at the MOST Point Buy" I was told "no... I don't want to do that, I like my stats". Now given that I'm paid to run the DND group and these kids have paid a membership fee to get access to the group I'm not as well positioned as others to say "my way or the highway".
This week we had a very full table. We started playing at 615 with 8 players. During the next 30 minutes, two more people showed up and asked to join. I had to say "no, we can't fit more people at the table". One because they were so late, and two because one of them didn't have a character sheet and wasn't willing to go use a pregen, or take the time to make a new character. He wanted to play from memory.
At the end of the evening (and some fun but wild hijinks) I was approached by the club owner to discuss how to be more inclusive and to ensure that the two boys who were excluded this week could be included next week. There was a certain "because they pay a lot to be here and DND is part of why they have club memberships". I can respect that but I also am trying to sort out what my own options are as I generally like the kids, I like the story we're working on, and I like running DND.
One floated option is to have the kids run one of the tables. Here's the twist: The kids who are the most dedicated want someone to actually run a serious game. I'm not sure any of them are willing to just step in and be a DM. But, in contrast, of the kids that would end up at the "less serious" table, none of them I think are really mentally prepared to do the work to run a casual game either. I think they might have fun but I worry that the pressure to get "back" to the "big kid table" will become a future source of conflict.
I see a way to go forward here is for me to just stop running the games period and insist that I am there only as a group facilitator. The kids will NEED to find someone in the group to be DMs and those people will, simply, NEED to do the prep work. I'll be available by email during the week to help them prep and I'll be there during the sessions to mediate, moderate and do rules clarifications, but in the end the kids are doing the running. While it sounds good my concerns are that the kids themselves won't want this, or the one who "gets stuck" with the crazy table will simply not be able to manage his/ her peers as needed for everyone to feel they had fun.
Another pathway, and it's my favorite, is simple pre-register and "first come, first served". We hold seats until 615, and then once 7 people are at the table, it's game on. If you sign up and miss two sessions, you cannot sign up again until you've played 2 times. If the "favored" kids are so sure that they'll be there for DND then they can simply be sure to register and to actually BE there on time. I don't think this will fly with my boss either as she made it clear that we were to find a way to get those other kids to the table.
I think they want to see the "kids run the games". I could make that work too but it'll be a sales pitch to the kids. They need to step up and want to do it.
I'd say that there needs to be rules posted. For example, those late players should have only been allowed to use premade characters (for that session) since they did not come prepared. There's nothing wrong with them having prepared characters for the next session. And if you're going to let them be GMs, I highly recommend asking them for a synopsis of their stories if they're not using published campaigns to make sure they keep things appropriate prior to allowing them to be a GM.
if you have enough room I would try both options. Set up a sign in sheet for your table. and then the other kids can set up their own tables if they are not able to make it on time, or do not want to adhere to the group set up. If that wouldn't be an option I would probably step away and just be an adviser, maybe sit in on a few game and help DM until they get it. I understand if I am paying to be able to play I would want to be able to, but even if they are kids they need to learn responsibility of being able to make it on time and be able to bring what is needed.
I'd say that there needs to be rules posted. For example, those late players should have only been allowed to use premade characters (for that session) since they did not come prepared. There's nothing wrong with them having prepared characters for the next session. And if you're going to let them be GMs, I highly recommend asking them for a synopsis of their stories if they're not using published campaigns to make sure they keep things appropriate prior to allowing them to be a GM.
My thought is that they are more likely to be the "what do you want to kill this week?" kind of gaming which is fine as long as everyone wants to do it. My ~fear~ is that they'll quickly get caught up on the "no you can't; yes I can" argument that is easy for high-energy 11 yearolds to have. It's why I'm very concerned that the "non serious table" will become a dead zone. Which maybe I shouldn't worry about as it does take some pressure off of me and those kids opt to do something else.
if you have enough room I would try both options. Set up a sign in sheet for your table. and then the other kids can set up their own tables if they are not able to make it on time, or do not want to adhere to the group set up. If that wouldn't be an option I would probably step away and just be an adviser, maybe sit in on a few game and help DM until they get it. I understand if I am paying to be able to play I would want to be able to, but even if they are kids they need to learn responsibility of being able to make it on time and be able to bring what is needed.
Yeah.. I really really want to do a signup sheet with the "we start at 6, at 615 your seat goes to a stand by player". I really think that will work the best but I worry "the boss" will see it as to exclusionary.
The "kids DM" is the best option, really, but I think the prep work and the negotiation skills won't be there yet and I'll be in another meeting to discuss how to keep all the kids happy.
You mentioned in your initial post that this is a "mental health club." If that means that it's a support group for people with certain mental or emotional disabilities, you have to take that into consideration.
I'm Autistic, and the AANE, whose support groups I used to attend regularly, offers D&D "interest series" (limited runs of a few weeks, long enough for a short campaign) every once in a while.
I've never done one, since they charge some ridiculous amount like $80 (I can't remember if that's per session or total, but either way it's too much) to play a game I already play weekly for $5 at my local game store.
But I can imagine that the DM in those games has to deal with different challenges, and handle them in different ways, than a DM at an open play in a store or a home game, since people with ASD, myself included, tend to be more rigid, less open to change, especially to established routines, and less able to read the subtle, nonverbal social cues that D&D groups rely on to cohere and get along.
On the other hand, someone with ASD and a special interest in D&D is incredibly likely to have, as in your situation, memorized all of the rules. Making that a strength and not a weakness, for instance by having that kid try DMing or purposely turning to them for input on rules questions, would be a potential way to make sure they have fun and feel valued.
Tailoring your responses to the kids' personalities and specific issues instead of going at this like a generic D&D situation, where the assumption is neurotypical until proven otherwise, might go a long way.
Finally, if these are young teens, they're likely relying on someone else to get them there. Absolutely make them use pregens if they come unprepared, but turning kids away because their mom or the bus/train was running late seems less than ideal if you can find a different solution.
I've run D&D games for several years as part of my work with the boys & girls club and as part of my youth ministry before that. I think you are dealing with a wider age-range than I had to, could that be part of the issue? It sounds like you might have a wide variety of maturity levels. If possible you might want to set an age limit.
Also, I've had some success with a player-contract, a way of setting out explicitly what you are expecting from the players. Having that is part of the value of role playing, even when it's not literally and explicitly expressed. Part of the kids socialization is learning to deal with other people and be flexible, so if there's a bit of a struggle it might still be a learning opportunity. if your boss is worried that that seems to exclusionary, explain to them that this is part of the value of what they are learning.
I'm also very big on the idea that everyone takes a turn to DM. If there're not concerned with an overarching story plot that just makes it easier. When everyone takes a turn at being a DM they all get to see how certain things can be frustrating when you are the DM. That makes them less likely to repeat those behaviors. That being said, I would always make a point of explicitly pointing that out such things to them.
Both those cases and whenever you have a issue arise at the table, during your wrap up, make a point of talking to them about it. Saying things like "Now how could we have avoided this, and how should we avoid this in the future?"
I'm in a very specific situation and I'm trying to sort out what I can do, what I should do, and what I need to avoid. It's not a case entirely of my own creation so some of my "go to" solutions are just off the table.
Here's what we have: The DND group is through a private teen social/ mental health club. There is a membership fee that gets teens access to the club every afternoon/ evening. They have video games, board games, and weekly "Groups" that meet for creative writing, photography, and Dungeons and Dragons. The DND group is one that they have struggled to keep active not because of lack of interest, but because of lack of people to "run" it. There are two DnD groups a "serious" and a "not serious" group. The "not serious" is doing pretty well for itself as it's mostly one of the club counselors just being the referee in random character relationship drama. Last week, I'm lead to understand, was a custody battle over a pet slime two characters had adopted. I've been asked to take over the "Serious" DND group and I am compensated for my time.
Speaking of time, the group runs for just 2 hours, 6-8pm on Friday nights. I'm asked to be there for "set up and break down" half an hour before and after the sessions. Which is fine and I'm good with a little 3 hour window on my friday nights.
Of the kids who want to do the serious DND group there are some variations of interest, storytelling ability, and their own investment. One of the kids declares an attack action every time she can, and no amount of consequence seems to dissuade her. Contrast that with a young man who can quote every single rule in the books and who is unable to declare any action because he can imagine the 100000 ways that a DM can take any specific action and use it against the party. I have also had multiple conflicts already because the kids all have "their characters" they want to play and when I said "well I run games using the standard array, or at the MOST Point Buy" I was told "no... I don't want to do that, I like my stats". Now given that I'm paid to run the DND group and these kids have paid a membership fee to get access to the group I'm not as well positioned as others to say "my way or the highway".
This week we had a very full table. We started playing at 615 with 8 players. During the next 30 minutes, two more people showed up and asked to join. I had to say "no, we can't fit more people at the table". One because they were so late, and two because one of them didn't have a character sheet and wasn't willing to go use a pregen, or take the time to make a new character. He wanted to play from memory.
At the end of the evening (and some fun but wild hijinks) I was approached by the club owner to discuss how to be more inclusive and to ensure that the two boys who were excluded this week could be included next week. There was a certain "because they pay a lot to be here and DND is part of why they have club memberships". I can respect that but I also am trying to sort out what my own options are as I generally like the kids, I like the story we're working on, and I like running DND.
One floated option is to have the kids run one of the tables. Here's the twist: The kids who are the most dedicated want someone to actually run a serious game. I'm not sure any of them are willing to just step in and be a DM. But, in contrast, of the kids that would end up at the "less serious" table, none of them I think are really mentally prepared to do the work to run a casual game either. I think they might have fun but I worry that the pressure to get "back" to the "big kid table" will become a future source of conflict.
I see a way to go forward here is for me to just stop running the games period and insist that I am there only as a group facilitator. The kids will NEED to find someone in the group to be DMs and those people will, simply, NEED to do the prep work. I'll be available by email during the week to help them prep and I'll be there during the sessions to mediate, moderate and do rules clarifications, but in the end the kids are doing the running. While it sounds good my concerns are that the kids themselves won't want this, or the one who "gets stuck" with the crazy table will simply not be able to manage his/ her peers as needed for everyone to feel they had fun.
Another pathway, and it's my favorite, is simple pre-register and "first come, first served". We hold seats until 615, and then once 7 people are at the table, it's game on. If you sign up and miss two sessions, you cannot sign up again until you've played 2 times. If the "favored" kids are so sure that they'll be there for DND then they can simply be sure to register and to actually BE there on time. I don't think this will fly with my boss either as she made it clear that we were to find a way to get those other kids to the table.
I think they want to see the "kids run the games". I could make that work too but it'll be a sales pitch to the kids. They need to step up and want to do it.
Or is there something I'm missing...?
"Teller of tales, dreamer of dreams"
Tips, Tricks, Maps: Lantern Noir Presents
**Streams hosted at at twitch.tv/LaternNoir
I'd say that there needs to be rules posted. For example, those late players should have only been allowed to use premade characters (for that session) since they did not come prepared. There's nothing wrong with them having prepared characters for the next session. And if you're going to let them be GMs, I highly recommend asking them for a synopsis of their stories if they're not using published campaigns to make sure they keep things appropriate prior to allowing them to be a GM.
if you have enough room I would try both options. Set up a sign in sheet for your table. and then the other kids can set up their own tables if they are not able to make it on time, or do not want to adhere to the group set up. If that wouldn't be an option I would probably step away and just be an adviser, maybe sit in on a few game and help DM until they get it. I understand if I am paying to be able to play I would want to be able to, but even if they are kids they need to learn responsibility of being able to make it on time and be able to bring what is needed.
My thought is that they are more likely to be the "what do you want to kill this week?" kind of gaming which is fine as long as everyone wants to do it. My ~fear~ is that they'll quickly get caught up on the "no you can't; yes I can" argument that is easy for high-energy 11 yearolds to have. It's why I'm very concerned that the "non serious table" will become a dead zone. Which maybe I shouldn't worry about as it does take some pressure off of me and those kids opt to do something else.
Yeah.. I really really want to do a signup sheet with the "we start at 6, at 615 your seat goes to a stand by player". I really think that will work the best but I worry "the boss" will see it as to exclusionary.
The "kids DM" is the best option, really, but I think the prep work and the negotiation skills won't be there yet and I'll be in another meeting to discuss how to keep all the kids happy.
"Teller of tales, dreamer of dreams"
Tips, Tricks, Maps: Lantern Noir Presents
**Streams hosted at at twitch.tv/LaternNoir
You mentioned in your initial post that this is a "mental health club." If that means that it's a support group for people with certain mental or emotional disabilities, you have to take that into consideration.
I'm Autistic, and the AANE, whose support groups I used to attend regularly, offers D&D "interest series" (limited runs of a few weeks, long enough for a short campaign) every once in a while.
I've never done one, since they charge some ridiculous amount like $80 (I can't remember if that's per session or total, but either way it's too much) to play a game I already play weekly for $5 at my local game store.
But I can imagine that the DM in those games has to deal with different challenges, and handle them in different ways, than a DM at an open play in a store or a home game, since people with ASD, myself included, tend to be more rigid, less open to change, especially to established routines, and less able to read the subtle, nonverbal social cues that D&D groups rely on to cohere and get along.
On the other hand, someone with ASD and a special interest in D&D is incredibly likely to have, as in your situation, memorized all of the rules. Making that a strength and not a weakness, for instance by having that kid try DMing or purposely turning to them for input on rules questions, would be a potential way to make sure they have fun and feel valued.
Tailoring your responses to the kids' personalities and specific issues instead of going at this like a generic D&D situation, where the assumption is neurotypical until proven otherwise, might go a long way.
Finally, if these are young teens, they're likely relying on someone else to get them there. Absolutely make them use pregens if they come unprepared, but turning kids away because their mom or the bus/train was running late seems less than ideal if you can find a different solution.
I've run D&D games for several years as part of my work with the boys & girls club and as part of my youth ministry before that. I think you are dealing with a wider age-range than I had to, could that be part of the issue? It sounds like you might have a wide variety of maturity levels. If possible you might want to set an age limit.
Also, I've had some success with a player-contract, a way of setting out explicitly what you are expecting from the players. Having that is part of the value of role playing, even when it's not literally and explicitly expressed. Part of the kids socialization is learning to deal with other people and be flexible, so if there's a bit of a struggle it might still be a learning opportunity. if your boss is worried that that seems to exclusionary, explain to them that this is part of the value of what they are learning.
I'm also very big on the idea that everyone takes a turn to DM. If there're not concerned with an overarching story plot that just makes it easier. When everyone takes a turn at being a DM they all get to see how certain things can be frustrating when you are the DM. That makes them less likely to repeat those behaviors. That being said, I would always make a point of explicitly pointing that out such things to them.
Both those cases and whenever you have a issue arise at the table, during your wrap up, make a point of talking to them about it. Saying things like "Now how could we have avoided this, and how should we avoid this in the future?"