Bards of the College of Wit challenge eachother and themselves to never be caught unawares. Originating from a land long dead, this college has prospered from its prior decay, and has risen like a pheonix. They train bards to never be caught without a retort or plan, and to never stop thinking on your toes, fins, or twigs. ""Blades may be sharp, but the wit is sharper," is their motto, proving that above all else, what truly matters is the mind, and how an insult or plan can be used. With abilities ranging from physically manifesting your insults to help them land, to keeping one eye always open, no bard will ever be denied by the College of Wits, for they truly know that the best bard, is one with their wits about them.

Sharp Wit

Every student of any college must know how best to use their mind and tongue to deliver quick and deadly insults, to the detriment of foes, but those at the College of Wit take it a step further. They choose to take advantage of their own fast thinking and sharpen their tongues to the point that their magic becomes as real and as sharp as the very blades they are up against. Many say that the pen is mightier than the sword, but here at the College of Wit, the mind and tongue are even mightier than them combined. (Or at least, that's what the professors say). In exchange for losing it's natural ranged features, and its spell save, your "Vicious Mockery" becomes a "Sharp Retort." From now on, whenever you cast Vicious Mockery, you gain a magical blade dependent on the path you choose as you level. This blade lasts for one turn, and gains your spell attack modifier to the to-hit rolls and damage rolls. (Bonus points if you give a good insult while stabbing them.)

 

another idk

vinum potar rules 
- totally not vinum potar

prop not final one, dont know yet

mmmmmm cheese

Choice of Blade

This is a tradition, passed down to all members of our Collgege who make it this far, as started by our founder. He who shall guide us, who proved that no matter your spiecies, of bugbear, or ogre, of human, or elf, that any can have a strong enough wit to beat out even the gods. So now we pass down this honor to you, our newest generation, and allow you to choose your blade, and decide your path. You have several to choose from, with varying differences of strengths and weaknesses, and we hope you choose wisely...

Quickest Wit: You choose to follow the path of the quickest, sharpest wit. You hone your mind and tongue to a degree that many can not follow, and form your blade in that of a rapier. Sharp and fast, thin yet deadly. This blade will follow you till the ends of you life, and will never betray you. It will pierce the very heavens with your retorts. (Add what this actually means, 1d8)

Balanced Wit: You choose to follow the path of balance, of perfection in all arts, and of the best jack of all trades. You decide that all parts, from the mind, to the tongue, to the body that weilds it, must be strong in order to make jokes, retorts, and mocks capable of piercing the hearts of gods. With this spread of powers, you blade invokes your will, becoming a longsword that shall loyally serve you for all eternity. (Add what this actually means, 1d10)

Greatest Wit: You choose to follow the path of power, of overpowering might, and of unstoppable quips. You have abandoned all other senses and focus only on the very power of a quip itself. What makes a good joke? A masterful come back? An unstoppable verbal assault? These are the questions you decided to answer, and answer them you shall. You will test your resolve against the cosmos, and find it wanting. (Add what this actually means, 1d12)