I have a player (warlock), who has for quite some time, expressed interest in changing characters, but wants to do so in a "big" way, but hasn't committed to the idea. Now last session, he nearly single-handedly decided to attack an extremely powerful Fey that they have spent several sessions hunting down to make a deal in order to obtain an important artifact needed to quell/stop a war between the Summer and Winter Courts. They found the negotiations and her desires and wants too outside of their moral comfort zone, and he decided to "sneakily" banish her away and steal the object, which, of course, failed...

Now he has asked to possibly have this as some kind of exit for his character, in hopes of channeling his patrons powers to banish both her and him to his patrons plane. His patron is Levistus, by the way. This is not something I would ever allow, nor do I think he has earned the satisfaction of "sacrificing" himself or a powerful archfey to his patron with such ease. It would be something I'd homebrew a Divine Intervention type rule, for warlocks, using a flat d100 roll, requiring a 12 or below to pull such Deus ex Machina style bullshit.

I do want this to be some sort of a lesson, that they can't simply fight their way through everything, and that they should accept the fact that not all deals are equal or mutually beneficial. They've known about her influence, power, and ability for quite a long time, and we're instructed by several key NPCs that combat should not be pursued. Nor do I think, the archfey has any plans to go easy on them for their insolence to attack her in her own home/lair. It's not an impossible fight, but it is definitely a borderline deadly one. She is definitely going to focus most of her efforts to eliminate the warlock that started a fight, which shouldn't come as a surprise, but if it does end up with his death, then I do want there to be some kind of closure or positive out of it.

I'm considering the possibility of allowing his party members to leave with their lives if he should sacrifice himself, in addition to completing certain demands that she asked for during their initial parley, and in exchange she will give them this artifact and allow them to leave with their lives. The initial demands she had made were for their last breaths (Permanently auto fail a death saving throw) and help her create a gateway to the prime material plane for her to further expend her influence and reach. She also gave them the option to offer a sacrifice of friendship (allow the party to sacrifice one of themselves, but they must fight to the death 1vs5) in addition to the first request.

Can I get some ideas of how I can give the potential for the warlock to go out in a "decent" way, rather than just cut him down mercilessly for his insolence? I could have her end the fight after she drops a player or two, or if a tpk is incoming, and allow them the freedom to accept her demands or die knowing they've failed to save not just their own plane, but the Fey realm as well...

Is this too brutal or railroad-y? I feel not, because they've had several options for deals from the very beginning, all of which they turned down because they didn't want to...

I do not think so, but talk to your players out-of-game and see what they think.

I would definitely speak to the player outside of the game first. This really seems like an issue between you and them, not between their character and any other in-game thing. Trying to solve OOG issues with IG solutions doesn’t usually go very well.

Let him die, but keep his character sheet.  Have the Boss, resurrect him but in a way, that the Boss has complete control of him, Maybe like a Skull Lord or a Death Knight.  That hunts the party down andinterferes with their missions.  But when they do meet, they will recognize it is their old companion.  The player gets a new character and is happy and has fun.  You get a new toy to torment the group with.  everyone is happy

if the player isnt having fun with his character, i think you should let him switch. just tell him he has to stick with his next character.

I would say that it is okay for him to banish him and the fey to Levistus's domain, but there has to consequences. Like say for example because it is a devil, Levistus binds the fey to him so that the fey has to serve him and the players will meet the fey again but the fey might have some minor minions or something with him/her.

Also this gives the PCs time to gather more supplies to help them defeat the fey. Maybe even let them know the Fey is coming by sending minor minions that say clues that the fey is coming.

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Can I get some ideas of how I can give the potential for the warlock to go out in a "decent" way, rather than just cut him down mercilessly for his insolence?

If the player really wants to "retire" their current warlock character, then I'd work with them to have the warlock give up their life to appease this powerful Fey. Giving up their life may or may not necessarily entail dying, since the Fey might actually want to keep the insolent mortal as a capture or even servent to compensate for their previous actions. As a new NPC, perhaps that warlock gives up their ties to Levistus and now serves the Fey instead (in a much more indentured servant capacity...).

That doesn't necessarily mean that the players don't have to pay a price for the Fey's assistance, but it could negate the previous insult that the warlock created. Plus, it might pay a larger portion of the Fey's price, so that the remaining cost is more palatable to the players/characters. Sure the Fey still wants something, but they just gained a new minion to help further their causes or they gain a new toy to mess with before ultimately destroying it.