I'm trying to homebrew a subclass for a "necrocleric". A doctor/cleric who has lost his faith and his family and is starting to turn to necromancy to try to bring them back. I've essentially taken a wizard based and added in some cleric class feats, but it's probably OP at this point. Looking for recommendations to balance it and help it not be broken. Should I get rid of some feats? Delay them for higher levels? Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks in advance.
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
Unlike other domains, Existential clerics are not bound to their god. Instead, they have either rejected them outright or have been rejected by the gods. Rather, Existential clerics draw from forces that give gods their power, bypassing the gods completely. If a typical cleric is a scientist, then a cleric of Existentialism would be a philosopher; studying abstract, immaterial concepts and applying it to the world around them. The domain focuses not only on manipulating life and death but of understanding why life and death exist. By following this domain, clerics seek to correct flaws in natural law, either for the good of the realm or for personal gain.
Clerics of this domain may still take up the cause of a god, though their god will not be the source of their power. They might be courted by gods who grant him their powers, unbeknownst to them. If you do not choose a god, your divine focus is of a holy rune of your creation.
Circle of Mortality
At 2nd level, you gain the ability to manipulate the line between life and death. When you would normally roll one or more dice to restore hit points with a spell to a creature at 0 hit points, you instead use the highest number possible for each die.
In addition, you learn the spare the dying cantrip, which doesn’t count against the number of cleric cantrips you know. For you, it has a range of 30 feet, and you can cast it as a bonus action.
Weapon & Armor Proficiencies
As a cleric would be, you are proficient in simple weapons, light armor, and shields.
Forsaken
Because Existential Domain clerics serve no god, they have been cut off from the gifts of power that other clerics receive. Instead of spells being known at each level, Existential Domain clerics must learn them as magic users would learn their spells and record them in a spellbook. However, as your divine magic fades your self-reliance gives you proficiency in any 2 skills or tools. At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills.
Existential clerics still start with three cantrips and six 1st level spells, as normal. As well as proficiency in simple weapons, light armor, and shields.
Due to your history of self-reliance and learning from others, you know 2 cantrips from any spell list and always have them prepared in addition to normal spell slots.
Scholar of Life & Death
Beginning when you select this school at 2nd level, the gold and time you must spend to copy a necromancy or evocation spell into your spellbook is halved.
Reaper's Choice
Beginning at 6th level, when you cast a spell that has the radiant or necrotic effect, you can choose either of the two.
Spell Siphon
Starting at 2nd Level, you gain the ability to siphon spells from other spell casters.
Once per long rest, when you save against a spell of your casting level or lower, use a reaction to make an Perception check. DC = 10 + 2x the spell level. On a success, you are able to memorize the spell and prepare it after a long rest. If the spell is successful, you can copy the spell into your spellbook at half the cost of material components.
Soul Siphon
At 5th level, you gain the ability to siphon some of the healing meant for another creature and heal yourself. You can siphon up to the spell level plus your Wisdom modifier.
At 7th level, you gain the ability to reap life energy from creatures you kill with your spells. Once per turn when you kill one or more creatures with a spell of 1st level or higher, you regain hit points equal to twice the spell’s level, or three times its level if the spell belongs to the School of Necromancy. You don’t gain this benefit for killing constructs or undead.
Expertise
At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills.
Undead Thralls
At 6th level, you add the animate dead spell to your spellbook if it is not there already. When you cast animate dead, you can target one additional corpse or pile of bones, creating another zombie or skeleton, as appropriate.
Whenever you create an undead using a necromancy spell, it has additional benefits:
The creature’s hit point maximum is increased by an amount equal to your wizard level.
The creature adds your proficiency bonus to its weapon damage rolls.
Master of Morality
Beginning at 10th level, you have spent so much time studying and walking the line between life and death, you gain the ability to resist and ignore resistance to either radiant or necrotic damage. After a long rest, you may change the damage type.
Additionally, your attacks do an extra 1d8 radiant or necrotic damage (your choice). At 14th level, this increased to 2d8 and 3d8 at 18th level.
Command Undead
Starting at 14th level, you can use magic to bring undead under your control, even those created by other wizards. As an action, you can choose one undead that you can see within 60 feet of you. That creature must make a Charisma saving throw against your wizard spell save DC. If it succeeds, you can’t use this feature on it again. If it fails, it becomes friendly to you and obeys your commands until you use this feature again.
Intelligent undead are harder to control in this way. If the target has an Intelligence of 8 or higher, it has advantage on the saving throw. If it fails the saving throw and has an Intelligence of 12 or higher, it can repeat the saving throw at the end of every hour until it succeeds and breaks free.
You have too much going on right now. There’s 12 subclass features. You should get that down to four to six.
Also, this subclass doesn’t feel like a wizard subclass. It looks to me like it would be better suited as a cleric subclass. The story is one of a cleric who finds divine power not in a traditional deity but in philosophy. Even more so, a cleric gets their subclass at first level, meaning they have divine power from the very start. A wizard, on the other hand, has no such divine magic until they pick this subclass at 2nd level and reject the idea of divine magic but gain it? It feels like more work to go from wizard to existential cleric than it is to go from cleric to existential cleric.
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
It sounds as though they draw from raw magic. Raw magic is dangerous and hard to control, that is why only gods can draw from it without too many setbacks but they also run into problems (that's also why most gods have a domain). If that is your source you should try to incorporate the negative random probably into the way spells work for this subclass. One way is to have them roll on some sort of raw magic side effect chart for each spell level.
Circle of Mortality
"At 2nd level, you gain the ability to manipulate the line between life and death. When you would normally roll one or more dice to restore hit points with a spell to a creature at 0 hit points, you instead use the highest number possible for each die."
* That is broken especially at that level it would make sense to have that as your capstone though.
"In addition, you learn the spare the dying cantrip, which doesn’t count against the number of cleric cantrips you know. For you, it has a range of 30 feet, and you can cast it as a bonus action."
* This by its self would be pretty good for this level.
Weapon & Armor Proficiencies
"As a cleric would be, you are proficient in simple weapons, light armor, and shields"
*This is appropriate only if you are actually a cleric
** Is this a wizard or a cleric? It sounds like a hubris cleric so from now on I will assume this is a cleric subclass of a fallen verity. In which case you should make it a 1st level domain and not a wizard 2nd level circle.
Forsaken
"Because Existential Domain clerics serve no god, they have been cut off from the gifts of power that other clerics receive. Instead of spells being known at each level, Existential Domain clerics must learn them as magic users would learn their spells and record them in a spellbook. However, as your divine magic fades your self-reliance gives you proficiency in any 2 skills or tools. At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills.
Existential clerics still start with three cantrips and six 1st level spells, as normal. As well as proficiency in simple weapons, light armor, and shields."
*I would just reword that completely it's a little redundant and doesn't make sense. You have already stated the weapon and armor proficiency no need to do it again.
**Forsaken: the existential cleric has forsaken the Gods and in deep hubris seeks to usurp the source of their power for themselves. Being Godless they must prepare their own spells similar to the way Wizards prepare their spells existential clerics take notes on their experiments with raw Magic finding what works and doesn't work in a notebook similar to that of a Wizard's Arcane Spellbook. Existential clerics start with three cantrips and six 1st level spells.
*** Self-dedicated mind and body: At 2nd level, Your self-reliance gives expertise in 2 skills or tools of your choice.
"Echoes from the Past
Due to your history of self-reliance and learning from others, you know 2 cantrips from any spell list and always have them prepared in addition to normal spell slots.
Scholar of Life & Death
Beginning when you select this school at 2nd level, the gold and time you must spend to copy a necromancy or evocation spell into your spellbook is halved.
Reaper's Choice
Beginning at 6th level, when you cast a spell that has the radiant or necrotic effect, you can choose either of the two."
*I would scrap all of that there is too much and it's not necessary
Spell Siphon
"Starting at 2nd Level, you gain the ability to siphon spells from other spell casters.
Once per long rest, when you save against a spell of your casting level or lower, use a reaction to make an Perception check. DC = 10 + 2x the spell level. On a success, you are able to memorize the spell and prepare it after a long rest. If the spell is successful, you can copy the spell into your spellbook at half the cost of material components."
* 2nd level is way to soon and this is way to powerful as is
** Starting at 6th Level, you gain the ability to siphon knowledge from other spell caster's spell.
Once per long rest, when you save against a spell of your casting level or lower, use a reaction to perform a wisdom saving throw DC = 10 + 2 times the spell level. On a success, you have 24 hours to copy the spell into your Raw magic notebook at twice the cost and must take a long rest to reflect on the spells intricacies before you can use it. On a failure you are dazed for 1d4 rounds and don't benefit from the effects of this ability.
Soul Siphon
"At 5th level, you gain the ability to siphon some of the healing meant for another creature and heal yourself. You can siphon up to the spell level plus your Wisdom modifier.
At 7th level, you gain the ability to reap life energy from creatures you kill with your spells. Once per turn when you kill one or more creatures with a spell of 1st level or higher, you regain hit points equal to twice the spell’s level, or three times its level if the spell belongs to the School of Necromancy. You don’t gain this benefit for killing constructs or undead."
* get rid of the 5th level part
**At 8th level, you gain the ability to reap life energy from creatures you kill with your spells. Once per turn when you kill one or more creatures with a spell, you regain hit points equal to twice the Damage of your spell. You don’t gain this benefit for killing constructs or undead.
”Expertise
At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills."
* scrap it we already have it
"Undead Thralls
At 6th level, you add the animate dead spell to your spellbook if it is not there already. When you cast animate dead, you can target one additional corpse or pile of bones, creating another zombie or skeleton, as appropriate.
Whenever you create an undead using a necromancy spell, it has additional benefits:
The creature’s hit point maximum is increased by an amount equal to your wizard level.
The creature adds your proficiency bonus to its weapon damage rolls."
*scrap it
"Master of Morality
Beginning at 10th level, you have spent so much time studying and walking the line between life and death, you gain the ability to resist and ignore resistance to either radiant or necrotic damage. After a long rest, you may change the damage type.
Additionally, your attacks do an extra 1d8 radiant or necrotic damage (your choice). At 14th level, this increased to 2d8 and 3d8 at 18th level."
* scrap and replace it
Master of life and death
Beginning at 10th level, you have dedicated much of time studying and walking the line between life and death, when ever you cast a healing, revival or necromancy that would normally target one creature you can instead choose to target two.
"Command Undead
Starting at 14th level, you can use magic to bring undead under your control, even those created by other wizards. As an action, you can choose one undead that you can see within 60 feet of you. That creature must make a Charisma saving throw against your wizard spell save DC. If it succeeds, you can’t use this feature on it again. If it fails, it becomes friendly to you and obeys your commands until you use this feature again.
Intelligent undead is harder to control in this way. If the target has an Intelligence of 8 or higher, it has an advantage on the saving throw. If it fails the saving throw and has an Intelligence of 12 or higher, it can repeat the saving throw at the end of every hour until it succeeds and breaks free."
*scrap and replace
Raw Understanding
At 17th level, you have handled Raw magic and gone through its trials and tribulations for so long you now know how to tame it. You are no longer required to roll on the random raw magic side effects tables.
Replace the clerics 10th level divine intervention with
Cult following: people have taken notice of your deliberate disobedience the Gods some spurn you for it but others see you as a prophet or a deity amongst them. You are now no longer welcome in any organized religious place, however, those who see you as a prophet or deity may pray to you. Whenever you receive a prayer directed to you and you fulfill it you regain your spell slots as if it were a long rest. this ability is limited to 1/week.
Replace the 20th level cleric ability improved divine intervention with
Spell of a god: work with your DM to come up with a single unique 10th level spell you also gain one spell slot to cast it and whenever you cast it you run the risk of death (roll a d4 on a 1 you die after the spell is fully cast).
Thank you. This is the most helpful anybody has been - really the only attempt at helping anybody has done across D&DB and Reddit.
The subclass started as a cleric as it was being made to try to fit a necrocleric character I was trying to make. After a while I realized it was cleaner and got closer to what I was trying to do if I based it off a necromancy wizard instead of a cleric. The idea of the character being he goes from NPC doctor, rejecting his Grave Domain family's way of devoting themselves to one god and receiving powers, to learn what the world and other gods have to offer. The long term plan, subject to how things organically change in the campaign, is to delve further into necromancy and away from healing, with the idea being to bring his wife and child back from the dead.... Yes, being a cleric gets you resurrection, but random NPC from a little village wouldn't necessarily know that so he's going to keep experimenting, trying everything he can to get it right (which in-game means "accidentally" raising zombies).
I've actually tweaked it some since I posted this and the changes reflect some of what you said (moving things into higher levels, for example), but the redundancy comes from either tweaking it so much and fragments being left behind or that it was easier to get the homebrew builder to do what I wanted it to that way.
Circle of Mortality may sound broken, but it is ripped straight off of a Grave Domain cleric 1st level class feature verbatim.
I do like the idea of the raw magic risk/reward kind of thing you mentioned, but I can't find any side effect chart or information - or did you mean to homebrew that as well?
The subclass started as a cleric as it was being made to try to fit a necrocleric character I was trying to make. After a while I realized it was cleaner and got closer to what I was trying to do if I based it off a necromancy wizard instead of a cleric.
I think you can still have necromancy wizard flavor through a cleric domain, just look at death and grave domain. Make sure animate dead is on the domain spell list and give them a command/control undead channel divinity.
Also, if you are planning on publishing the subclass on D&D Beyond (which is not a prerequisite to use it in your home games), I would be very cautious about having too many features verbatim from other subclasses, especially nonSRD subclasses.
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
I'm trying to homebrew a subclass for a "necrocleric". A doctor/cleric who has lost his faith and his family and is starting to turn to necromancy to try to bring them back. I've essentially taken a wizard based and added in some cleric class feats, but it's probably OP at this point. Looking for recommendations to balance it and help it not be broken. Should I get rid of some feats? Delay them for higher levels? Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks in advance.
https://www.dndbeyond.com/classes/wizard/subclass/283388/edit#features
Could you please share a published link to your subclass? The link you used only you can see.
Tooltips | Snippet Code | How to Homebrew on D&D Beyond | Subclass Guide | Feature Roadmap
Astromancer's Homebrew Assembly
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
It won't let me because:
Here's a link to a PDF I originally sent to a character artist. It has a little more stuff in the PDF but screenshots of the subclass are at the end.
https://drive.google.com/open?id=17-lvmtV76Q-RNusxiiArDh9YVrCeQNIw
The google drive link doesn't work.
The easiest way to share it now is to copy and paste the details page.
Tooltips | Snippet Code | How to Homebrew on D&D Beyond | Subclass Guide | Feature Roadmap
Astromancer's Homebrew Assembly
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
Sorry this is apparently so difficult:
Unlike other domains, Existential clerics are not bound to their god. Instead, they have either rejected them outright or have been rejected by the gods. Rather, Existential clerics draw from forces that give gods their power, bypassing the gods completely. If a typical cleric is a scientist, then a cleric of Existentialism would be a philosopher; studying abstract, immaterial concepts and applying it to the world around them. The domain focuses not only on manipulating life and death but of understanding why life and death exist. By following this domain, clerics seek to correct flaws in natural law, either for the good of the realm or for personal gain.
Clerics of this domain may still take up the cause of a god, though their god will not be the source of their power. They might be courted by gods who grant him their powers, unbeknownst to them. If you do not choose a god, your divine focus is of a holy rune of your creation.
Circle of Mortality
At 2nd level, you gain the ability to manipulate the line between life and death. When you would normally roll one or more dice to restore hit points with a spell to a creature at 0 hit points, you instead use the highest number possible for each die.
In addition, you learn the spare the dying cantrip, which doesn’t count against the number of cleric cantrips you know. For you, it has a range of 30 feet, and you can cast it as a bonus action.
Weapon & Armor Proficiencies
As a cleric would be, you are proficient in simple weapons, light armor, and shields.
Forsaken
Because Existential Domain clerics serve no god, they have been cut off from the gifts of power that other clerics receive. Instead of spells being known at each level, Existential Domain clerics must learn them as magic users would learn their spells and record them in a spellbook. However, as your divine magic fades your self-reliance gives you proficiency in any 2 skills or tools. At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills.
Existential clerics still start with three cantrips and six 1st level spells, as normal. As well as proficiency in simple weapons, light armor, and shields.
Existential Domain Spells
1st
inflict wounds, cure wounds
3rd
prayer of healing, spiritual weapon
5th
animate dead, revivify
7th
death ward, guardian of faith
9th
contagion, raise dead
Echoes from the Past
Due to your history of self-reliance and learning from others, you know 2 cantrips from any spell list and always have them prepared in addition to normal spell slots.
Scholar of Life & Death
Beginning when you select this school at 2nd level, the gold and time you must spend to copy a necromancy or evocation spell into your spellbook is halved.
Reaper's Choice
Beginning at 6th level, when you cast a spell that has the radiant or necrotic effect, you can choose either of the two.
Spell Siphon
Starting at 2nd Level, you gain the ability to siphon spells from other spell casters.
Once per long rest, when you save against a spell of your casting level or lower, use a reaction to make an Perception check. DC = 10 + 2x the spell level. On a success, you are able to memorize the spell and prepare it after a long rest. If the spell is successful, you can copy the spell into your spellbook at half the cost of material components.
Soul Siphon
At 5th level, you gain the ability to siphon some of the healing meant for another creature and heal yourself. You can siphon up to the spell level plus your Wisdom modifier.
At 7th level, you gain the ability to reap life energy from creatures you kill with your spells. Once per turn when you kill one or more creatures with a spell of 1st level or higher, you regain hit points equal to twice the spell’s level, or three times its level if the spell belongs to the School of Necromancy. You don’t gain this benefit for killing constructs or undead.
Expertise
At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills.
Undead Thralls
At 6th level, you add the animate dead spell to your spellbook if it is not there already. When you cast animate dead, you can target one additional corpse or pile of bones, creating another zombie or skeleton, as appropriate.
Whenever you create an undead using a necromancy spell, it has additional benefits:
Master of Morality
Beginning at 10th level, you have spent so much time studying and walking the line between life and death, you gain the ability to resist and ignore resistance to either radiant or necrotic damage. After a long rest, you may change the damage type.
Additionally, your attacks do an extra 1d8 radiant or necrotic damage (your choice). At 14th level, this increased to 2d8 and 3d8 at 18th level.
Command Undead
Starting at 14th level, you can use magic to bring undead under your control, even those created by other wizards. As an action, you can choose one undead that you can see within 60 feet of you. That creature must make a Charisma saving throw against your wizard spell save DC. If it succeeds, you can’t use this feature on it again. If it fails, it becomes friendly to you and obeys your commands until you use this feature again.
Intelligent undead are harder to control in this way. If the target has an Intelligence of 8 or higher, it has advantage on the saving throw. If it fails the saving throw and has an Intelligence of 12 or higher, it can repeat the saving throw at the end of every hour until it succeeds and breaks free.
Attempt 2 at Google Drive: https://drive.google.com/open?id=17-lvmtV76Q-RNusxiiArDh9YVrCeQNIw
You have too much going on right now. There’s 12 subclass features. You should get that down to four to six.
Also, this subclass doesn’t feel like a wizard subclass. It looks to me like it would be better suited as a cleric subclass. The story is one of a cleric who finds divine power not in a traditional deity but in philosophy. Even more so, a cleric gets their subclass at first level, meaning they have divine power from the very start. A wizard, on the other hand, has no such divine magic until they pick this subclass at 2nd level and reject the idea of divine magic but gain it? It feels like more work to go from wizard to existential cleric than it is to go from cleric to existential cleric.
Tooltips | Snippet Code | How to Homebrew on D&D Beyond | Subclass Guide | Feature Roadmap
Astromancer's Homebrew Assembly
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
It sounds as though they draw from raw magic. Raw magic is dangerous and hard to control, that is why only gods can draw from it without too many setbacks but they also run into problems (that's also why most gods have a domain). If that is your source you should try to incorporate the negative random probably into the way spells work for this subclass. One way is to have them roll on some sort of raw magic side effect chart for each spell level.
Circle of Mortality
"At 2nd level, you gain the ability to manipulate the line between life and death. When you would normally roll one or more dice to restore hit points with a spell to a creature at 0 hit points, you instead use the highest number possible for each die."
* That is broken especially at that level it would make sense to have that as your capstone though.
"In addition, you learn the spare the dying cantrip, which doesn’t count against the number of cleric cantrips you know. For you, it has a range of 30 feet, and you can cast it as a bonus action."
* This by its self would be pretty good for this level.
Weapon & Armor Proficiencies
"As a cleric would be, you are proficient in simple weapons, light armor, and shields"
*This is appropriate only if you are actually a cleric
** Is this a wizard or a cleric? It sounds like a hubris cleric so from now on I will assume this is a cleric subclass of a fallen verity. In which case you should make it a 1st level domain and not a wizard 2nd level circle.
Forsaken
"Because Existential Domain clerics serve no god, they have been cut off from the gifts of power that other clerics receive. Instead of spells being known at each level, Existential Domain clerics must learn them as magic users would learn their spells and record them in a spellbook. However, as your divine magic fades your self-reliance gives you proficiency in any 2 skills or tools. At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills.
Existential clerics still start with three cantrips and six 1st level spells, as normal. As well as proficiency in simple weapons, light armor, and shields."
*I would just reword that completely it's a little redundant and doesn't make sense. You have already stated the weapon and armor proficiency no need to do it again.
**Forsaken: the existential cleric has forsaken the Gods and in deep hubris seeks to usurp the source of their power for themselves. Being Godless they must prepare their own spells similar to the way Wizards prepare their spells existential clerics take notes on their experiments with raw Magic finding what works and doesn't work in a notebook similar to that of a Wizard's Arcane Spellbook. Existential clerics start with three cantrips and six 1st level spells.
*** Self-dedicated mind and body: At 2nd level, Your self-reliance gives expertise in 2 skills or tools of your choice.
"Echoes from the Past
Due to your history of self-reliance and learning from others, you know 2 cantrips from any spell list and always have them prepared in addition to normal spell slots.
Scholar of Life & Death
Beginning when you select this school at 2nd level, the gold and time you must spend to copy a necromancy or evocation spell into your spellbook is halved.
Reaper's Choice
Beginning at 6th level, when you cast a spell that has the radiant or necrotic effect, you can choose either of the two."
*I would scrap all of that there is too much and it's not necessary
Spell Siphon
"Starting at 2nd Level, you gain the ability to siphon spells from other spell casters.
Once per long rest, when you save against a spell of your casting level or lower, use a reaction to make an Perception check. DC = 10 + 2x the spell level. On a success, you are able to memorize the spell and prepare it after a long rest. If the spell is successful, you can copy the spell into your spellbook at half the cost of material components."
* 2nd level is way to soon and this is way to powerful as is
** Starting at 6th Level, you gain the ability to siphon knowledge from other spell caster's spell.
Once per long rest, when you save against a spell of your casting level or lower, use a reaction to perform a wisdom saving throw DC = 10 + 2 times the spell level. On a success, you have 24 hours to copy the spell into your Raw magic notebook at twice the cost and must take a long rest to reflect on the spells intricacies before you can use it. On a failure you are dazed for 1d4 rounds and don't benefit from the effects of this ability.
Soul Siphon
"At 5th level, you gain the ability to siphon some of the healing meant for another creature and heal yourself. You can siphon up to the spell level plus your Wisdom modifier.
At 7th level, you gain the ability to reap life energy from creatures you kill with your spells. Once per turn when you kill one or more creatures with a spell of 1st level or higher, you regain hit points equal to twice the spell’s level, or three times its level if the spell belongs to the School of Necromancy. You don’t gain this benefit for killing constructs or undead."
* get rid of the 5th level part
**At 8th level, you gain the ability to reap life energy from creatures you kill with your spells. Once per turn when you kill one or more creatures with a spell, you regain hit points equal to twice the Damage of your spell. You don’t gain this benefit for killing constructs or undead.
”Expertise
At 6th level, you gain expertise in 2 skills."
* scrap it we already have it
"Undead Thralls
At 6th level, you add the animate dead spell to your spellbook if it is not there already. When you cast animate dead, you can target one additional corpse or pile of bones, creating another zombie or skeleton, as appropriate.
Whenever you create an undead using a necromancy spell, it has additional benefits:
*scrap it
"Master of Morality
Beginning at 10th level, you have spent so much time studying and walking the line between life and death, you gain the ability to resist and ignore resistance to either radiant or necrotic damage. After a long rest, you may change the damage type.
Additionally, your attacks do an extra 1d8 radiant or necrotic damage (your choice). At 14th level, this increased to 2d8 and 3d8 at 18th level."
* scrap and replace it
Master of life and death
Beginning at 10th level, you have dedicated much of time studying and walking the line between life and death, when ever you cast a healing, revival or necromancy that would normally target one creature you can instead choose to target two.
"Command Undead
Starting at 14th level, you can use magic to bring undead under your control, even those created by other wizards. As an action, you can choose one undead that you can see within 60 feet of you. That creature must make a Charisma saving throw against your wizard spell save DC. If it succeeds, you can’t use this feature on it again. If it fails, it becomes friendly to you and obeys your commands until you use this feature again.
Intelligent undead is harder to control in this way. If the target has an Intelligence of 8 or higher, it has an advantage on the saving throw. If it fails the saving throw and has an Intelligence of 12 or higher, it can repeat the saving throw at the end of every hour until it succeeds and breaks free."
*scrap and replace
Raw Understanding
At 17th level, you have handled Raw magic and gone through its trials and tribulations for so long you now know how to tame it. You are no longer required to roll on the random raw magic side effects tables.
Replace the clerics 10th level divine intervention with
Cult following: people have taken notice of your deliberate disobedience the Gods some spurn you for it but others see you as a prophet or a deity amongst them. You are now no longer welcome in any organized religious place, however, those who see you as a prophet or deity may pray to you. Whenever you receive a prayer directed to you and you fulfill it you regain your spell slots as if it were a long rest. this ability is limited to 1/week.
Replace the 20th level cleric ability improved divine intervention with
Spell of a god: work with your DM to come up with a single unique 10th level spell you also gain one spell slot to cast it and whenever you cast it you run the risk of death (roll a d4 on a 1 you die after the spell is fully cast).
Thank you. This is the most helpful anybody has been - really the only attempt at helping anybody has done across D&DB and Reddit.
The subclass started as a cleric as it was being made to try to fit a necrocleric character I was trying to make. After a while I realized it was cleaner and got closer to what I was trying to do if I based it off a necromancy wizard instead of a cleric. The idea of the character being he goes from NPC doctor, rejecting his Grave Domain family's way of devoting themselves to one god and receiving powers, to learn what the world and other gods have to offer. The long term plan, subject to how things organically change in the campaign, is to delve further into necromancy and away from healing, with the idea being to bring his wife and child back from the dead.... Yes, being a cleric gets you resurrection, but random NPC from a little village wouldn't necessarily know that so he's going to keep experimenting, trying everything he can to get it right (which in-game means "accidentally" raising zombies).
I've actually tweaked it some since I posted this and the changes reflect some of what you said (moving things into higher levels, for example), but the redundancy comes from either tweaking it so much and fragments being left behind or that it was easier to get the homebrew builder to do what I wanted it to that way.
Circle of Mortality may sound broken, but it is ripped straight off of a Grave Domain cleric 1st level class feature verbatim.
I do like the idea of the raw magic risk/reward kind of thing you mentioned, but I can't find any side effect chart or information - or did you mean to homebrew that as well?
I think you can still have necromancy wizard flavor through a cleric domain, just look at death and grave domain. Make sure animate dead is on the domain spell list and give them a command/control undead channel divinity.
Also, if you are planning on publishing the subclass on D&D Beyond (which is not a prerequisite to use it in your home games), I would be very cautious about having too many features verbatim from other subclasses, especially nonSRD subclasses.
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Astromancer's Homebrew Assembly
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
I meant to homebrew one as well.
P.S. I would really like to see your finished product.