so I just created my first magic items and one 'monster' and I was wondering if you could peer-review it and possibly give me some feedback on those. All of them are supposed to be used in my next session which is a part of a bigger campaign so I would really, really appreciate your help on that one.
When it comes to items, I rather on ease with them, but the encounter is a rather crucial part of the next session (it is a boss) and I wouldn't want to blow it off by any means. Here are the links - let me know below or under the homebrew itself.
Item 1 is fine, I like the idea of it. Two things, based on its description, it should be legendary (based on it's power, rare). And specify that the item can cast identify once per day; otherwise, without attunement, it allows players to pass it arround each casting identify.
Item 2 suffers a bit of edgelord syndrome, but we can probably fix that. First, all attunments require an hour long meditation, so specifying that is redundant. Second, giving a static +5 to a relevant skill is a powerful ability (consider it would take +10 DEX to gain that), not too powerful, but powerful enough to watch out for. Compared to that the necrotic immunity is a little underwhelming (in my opinion), the ritual does not mention a casting time or use limit, I recommend the ritual take a short rest to perform.
The monster has several errors that official monsters don't. First, Hit points should be [multiplier]d[hit dice based on size]+[multiplier x constitution], in this case 7d8+7. Second, 7d8+7 averages to 39HP not 50. 9d8+9 averages 50. Third, he is not a druid, so why does he know druidic? Fourth, if he has 3rd level slots he is a level 5 cleric and should have another spell prepared and a 4th cantrip. Fifth, this is basically a CR5 creature not CR3, it's proficiency bonus actually already reflects this, but consider raising its hp to 83 (15d8+15) and add extra damage to the daggers (consider using poison con save between 10 and 13, damage between 3 (1d6) and 10 (3d6)). Buff depending on party. I feel like a level 4 party can fight this with some close calls but no deaths. The free animate dead every turn is more dangerous than the monster himself, remember he needs a corpse to animate it.
Thanks DxJxC, this is a really good feedback and you tapped into some very strong points there. Few issues you pointed out are just my total oversight like the druidic language or more detailed attunment descriptions. I generally find other homebrew I would and even some official ones rather vague in this department.
When it comes to Item 2 I was hoping to create something useful in some situations but rather disturbing as a general attire for my players - do you think that adding some counter balance like disadvantage on charisma based skills at the daylight would be a right direction?
What I want to ask is - the free animate dead spell takes up the spell slot anyway, right? So he would be able - given that there are corpses - animate only 2 skeletons or zombies. Am I correct?
This monster was based on Cult Fanatic which is CR 2, I evelated it to 3 but I definately don't want to go as far as CR 5 so I will work on it to nerf it a bit.
I don't really know what to tell you about item 2. It either needs reworked to be a bit weaker or given a small nudge up in power and turn it legendary... Putting a penalty on an item is a bad way to try to balance it. Clever players will try to find ways of taking advantage of the penalty, then they have a more powerful item.
Whether the animate dead takes a slot or not is up to wording, and currently it doesn't say it uses a slot. Also if it is an item or ability granting animate dead, it doesn't need to use slots at all. You can make it an innate spellcasting with 2 uses per day, or a special action with a 4-5 turn cool down. If you want to lower the power of this creature a bit, just lose the legendary actions, it isn't necessary for a named monster to be legendary, there are tons of examples in campaign books. Also make sure you go over your monster's skill bonuses, they don't auto calculate when you change stats.
Piggybacking on what DxJxC said, if the Sphinx Eye is legendary in character, but teetering between uncommon and rare, you may either want to reevaluate your description or add something more; truesight perhaps?
Item 2 suffers from flowery description and how it bleeds into mechanics. In particular, I'm referring to
For those familiar with arcane arts this item reveals far more superior features. Entwined in its weave, there is powerful spell nullifying any necrotic damage dealt by spell of level 3 or lower. This feature can be activated once. After that the user needs to perform a recharging ritual. The description of the ritual can be found in a tome called "Conflagration" or be acquired from any Orcus related cult member, clergy or demon.
If I was writing this, I would say
As a reaction, you gain immunity to necrotic damage until the start of your next turn. You may use this feature again after a long or short rest in which you complete a ritual dedicated to Orcus.
Lastly, if you have not balanced your monster against the DMG's Creating a Monster guide, I highly recommend you do so. It is probably the most important part of homebrewing a monster.
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
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Hi guys,
so I just created my first magic items and one 'monster' and I was wondering if you could peer-review it and possibly give me some feedback on those. All of them are supposed to be used in my next session which is a part of a bigger campaign so I would really, really appreciate your help on that one.
When it comes to items, I rather on ease with them, but the encounter is a rather crucial part of the next session (it is a boss) and I wouldn't want to blow it off by any means. Here are the links - let me know below or under the homebrew itself.
- Item 1
- Item 2
- Monster
Check my new Warlock subclass - The Living Plane
Item 1 is fine, I like the idea of it. Two things, based on its description, it should be legendary (based on it's power, rare). And specify that the item can cast identify once per day; otherwise, without attunement, it allows players to pass it arround each casting identify.
Item 2 suffers a bit of edgelord syndrome, but we can probably fix that. First, all attunments require an hour long meditation, so specifying that is redundant. Second, giving a static +5 to a relevant skill is a powerful ability (consider it would take +10 DEX to gain that), not too powerful, but powerful enough to watch out for. Compared to that the necrotic immunity is a little underwhelming (in my opinion), the ritual does not mention a casting time or use limit, I recommend the ritual take a short rest to perform.
The monster has several errors that official monsters don't. First, Hit points should be [multiplier]d[hit dice based on size]+[multiplier x constitution], in this case 7d8+7. Second, 7d8+7 averages to 39HP not 50. 9d8+9 averages 50. Third, he is not a druid, so why does he know druidic? Fourth, if he has 3rd level slots he is a level 5 cleric and should have another spell prepared and a 4th cantrip. Fifth, this is basically a CR5 creature not CR3, it's proficiency bonus actually already reflects this, but consider raising its hp to 83 (15d8+15) and add extra damage to the daggers (consider using poison con save between 10 and 13, damage between 3 (1d6) and 10 (3d6)). Buff depending on party. I feel like a level 4 party can fight this with some close calls but no deaths. The free animate dead every turn is more dangerous than the monster himself, remember he needs a corpse to animate it.
Thanks DxJxC, this is a really good feedback and you tapped into some very strong points there. Few issues you pointed out are just my total oversight like the druidic language or more detailed attunment descriptions. I generally find other homebrew I would and even some official ones rather vague in this department.
When it comes to Item 2 I was hoping to create something useful in some situations but rather disturbing as a general attire for my players - do you think that adding some counter balance like disadvantage on charisma based skills at the daylight would be a right direction?
What I want to ask is - the free animate dead spell takes up the spell slot anyway, right? So he would be able - given that there are corpses - animate only 2 skeletons or zombies. Am I correct?
This monster was based on Cult Fanatic which is CR 2, I evelated it to 3 but I definately don't want to go as far as CR 5 so I will work on it to nerf it a bit.
Check my new Warlock subclass - The Living Plane
I don't really know what to tell you about item 2. It either needs reworked to be a bit weaker or given a small nudge up in power and turn it legendary... Putting a penalty on an item is a bad way to try to balance it. Clever players will try to find ways of taking advantage of the penalty, then they have a more powerful item.
Whether the animate dead takes a slot or not is up to wording, and currently it doesn't say it uses a slot. Also if it is an item or ability granting animate dead, it doesn't need to use slots at all. You can make it an innate spellcasting with 2 uses per day, or a special action with a 4-5 turn cool down. If you want to lower the power of this creature a bit, just lose the legendary actions, it isn't necessary for a named monster to be legendary, there are tons of examples in campaign books. Also make sure you go over your monster's skill bonuses, they don't auto calculate when you change stats.
Piggybacking on what DxJxC said, if the Sphinx Eye is legendary in character, but teetering between uncommon and rare, you may either want to reevaluate your description or add something more; truesight perhaps?
Item 2 suffers from flowery description and how it bleeds into mechanics. In particular, I'm referring to
If I was writing this, I would say
Lastly, if you have not balanced your monster against the DMG's Creating a Monster guide, I highly recommend you do so. It is probably the most important part of homebrewing a monster.
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"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett