Evasion. If the YMCA Dude is subjected to an effect that allows it to make a Strength saving throw to take only half damage, the YMCA Dude instead takes no damage if it succeeds on the saving throw, and only half damage if it fails.

Multiattack. The YMCA Dude makes two attacks.

Shortsword. Melee Weapon Attack: +8 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 6 (1d12 + 3) slashing damage, and the target must make a DC 15 Constitution saving throw, taking 24 (7d6) poison damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one.

Light Crossbow. Ranged Weapon Attack: +6 to hit, range 80/320 ft., one target. Hit: 7 (1d10 + 4) piercing damage, and the target must make a DC 15 Constitution saving throw, taking 24 (7d6) poison damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one.

Extreme Yeet.  The YMCA Dude can perform any godly ability for one turn, such as flying through walls or seeing through objects.