Is it a bones day or a no bones day? Patrons of Noodle the Pug will divine the answer each morning with this homebrew subclass by Ezfi (she/her), a Massachusetts-based Tiktok creator and D&D Beyond user. This week, I sat down with Ezfi to talk about Noodle, what kind of warlock patron he would be, and what players can expect from her homebrew Dungeons & Dragons subclass.

For folks who don't know, who is Noodle, and can you explain what a bones and a no bones day is?

Ezfi: Noodle is a pug on the internet, on Tiktok. Noodle’s owner, Jonathan Graziano, has had a bit of a ritual for a while where, in the mornings, he goes over to Noodle [in his dog bed], lifts him up, puts him on his legs, and then lets go to see if [Noodle] is going to stay standing or flop back down on the bed.

They’ve been doing this for years and [Jonathan's] started posting it on Tiktok. When Noodle stands up, it’s called a bones day. And when Noodle flops back down, it’s called a no bones day. Generally, if it’s a bones day, there's more go-getter energy. Like, it’s kind of good luck — you’re going to go out and treat yourself. Both end up being days to treat yourself, to be honest. But a no bones day is a lower energy day. You stay home, take care of yourself, don’t go out, and don't make any crazy big moves.

@jongraz

we…are not worthy #pug #adoptdontshop #nobones #noodletok

♬ original sound - Jonathan

[Jonathan's] been doing this for a while. I actually had him on my "For You” page on Tiktok for a couple of months before he really blew up. But then, people discovered Noodle and started using Noodle as this divinatory tool [that’s] telling them how they need to live their life for that day. It got really big. [Noodle was] trending on Twitter, ended up going on the Today show, and got canceled by Rolling Stone.

That’s the general Noodle saga. It kind of started an internet cult and I was following it every bit of the way. It was fun.

Noodle is a kind creature, but if we’re looking at the D&D warlock, there are some intimidating patron options, like the Fiend and the Archfey. If Noodle were a patron in your own game, how would you envision him?

Ezfi: I’ve never thought about Noodle showing up in one of my games. I just made this as an exercise in a vacuum. But I think, for the humor value, I would play it straight.

Every morning [the warlock] gets a vision in their head of this dog standing up or lying down. And that’s the only real contact they have with their patron. Everything else is [the warlock] filling in the blanks and interacting with other people who are followers of Noodle and assigning all of these meanings [based on] whether it’s a bones or a no bones day.

But Noodle is just a pug.

I love the idea of a patron that is just a creature living its life, but all of its followers have assigned meanings to even the most mundane things.

Ezfi: It also sort of feels like the Great Old One patron, where you might not have a very close relationship with it. But it’s like, you’re just kind of tapping into this other entity that isn’t really paying that much attention to you and is just going about its life while you’re drawing this power and meaning from it — except a lot cuter.

So, what's your elevator pitch for the Noodle the Pug subclass?

Ezfi: If you’re removing all of the internet pug memes from it and looking at the mechanics of it, the idea is that it’s either a good luck day or a bad luck day, and your spell list and abilities change depending on that.

If it's a bones day, it’s a kind of good luck day. You’re going to be a bit better at attacking, you’re going to get advantage on things, [and] you’ve got heroism, beacon of hope, and other buff-your-friends spells. If it's a no bones day, or a bad luck day, then you’re going to have an expanded spell list with things like sleep and calm emotions and things that are going to improve your saving throws, get you temporary hit points, and also just up your defenses.

But [whether it’s a bones day or no bones day] is determined randomly, so it mixes things up a bit. 

How did you go about coming up with the features of the subclass? Or what was the first feature you came upon?

Ezfi: The first one was the idea of having your list of spells known change based on whether it’s a bones or no bones day. That’s actually a mechanic I’ve used for a different subclass that I never made public. I was playing in a campaign with a friend and I wanted to play a kind of elemental cleric that used a seven-element system that was central to my friend’s worldbuilding and their homebrew setting. There weren’t any cleric domains that fit, so I made my own. In order to get all seven elements in there, I made a different spell list for each one of them and I got to choose a different [spell list] depending on the day — and that was one of my core features. I played this for a campaign and it was pretty fun.

So, when I sat down to make something Noodle the pug related, I decided I could do something like that.

What inspired you to create the subclass?

Ezfi: Mostly comments I was seeing on Tiktok and in videos. I saw a handful of people saying, "Hey, Noodle would be a great warlock patron" and "I would sell my soul to that patron." Then, late one night, I was in the mood to make something and I couldn’t get that idea out of my head. So, I made something and kind of forgot about it for a week. Then I thought, "Maybe some people might be interested in this" and posted it.

How did the Tiktok video on the subclass end up doing for you?

Ezfi: I think it’s my most popular video now. It got me to my 1 millionth like across all my videos. 

@ezfii

🦴🔮🦴 I think it was a bones day when I made this I got possessed #dndtiktok #dndhomebrew #nobones #noodlethepug

♬ original sound - Ezfi

How do you envision the play style of the subclass?

Ezfi: I honestly was not envisioning a particularly strong play style when I was making this. I was pretty much going on vibes from Noodle. But one of the things I had in mind for this was [that] it’s less about having a specific play style that you would have built this character for and more about rolling with the punches based on whatever kind of day you’re given.

It’s not a subclass that is very well suited for min-maxing, because your build is going to change depending on the day. It’s almost like an anti-specific play style, if anything. But I tried to make sure that the features it offers are adaptable enough that you’re still going to have stuff you can use. Like, a warlock with eldritch blast is always going to benefit from an expanded crit range or getting advantage on an attack roll. And a bonus to your saving throws on a no bones day is always going to be useful.

I was curious about your reasoning on including bestow curse for no bones days.

Ezfi: While it’s not really in the spirit of Jonathan and Noodle’s vision of no bones days, a lot of people on the internet who have taken this and run with it have interpreted a no bones day as being bad luck. ... So, part of this subclass is being able to harness that ambient energy and either use it to defend yourself or inflict it onto other people in ways that work for you.

Although it is such a wholesome thing, this is still Dungeons & Dragons and you’re still fighting monsters.

If you were to put a Noodle the Pug warlock into a party, which classes do you think would complement them? Or which would just be a fun fit?

Ezfi: I don’t know mechanically what would be a good party fit, but I do think it would be very funny having a Divination wizard who is just miffed that this is your method of telling the future — someone who just cannot accept this.

What are you hoping people get out of playing this subclass?

Ezfi: I hope that they get to perform a lot of shenanigans. I don’t imagine this being played at many hyper-serious tables. So, I’m hoping it gets a lot of laughs, but [that the warlock] also doesn’t find that their play experience is being disrupted because the abilities don’t make sense or were unbalanced or anything like that.

Any reflections on the subclass since you published it?

Ezfi: I think my most egregious balance mistake is that I [originally] gave bones day bless, which fit the mood of the day, but there’s a reason bane takes an eldritch invocation to learn. Bless is even better — it’s very powerful with [Pact Magic]. It wasn’t something I was thinking about at 11 p.m. when typing this out for the first time.

So, I’m very glad that D&D Beyond has versioning that let me make that update. ... If anyone still has the version with bless on their spell sheet, for your DM’s sanity you might want to switch to the updated version.

What kinds of other homebrew things have you made?

Ezfi: I’ve been making homebrew content for D&D for, admittedly, longer than I’ve been playing D&D. I made some homebrew backgrounds before my first game, which is maybe ill-advised. But it’s one of my favorite creative outlets. Sometimes I make it as something I plan to use in a game, like when any of my friends need something homebrewed for one of their games. ... Sometimes I make it as a fun little creative exercise. And sometimes I post it online for people.

Lately, I’ve been making a lot of magic items on my Tiktok account and I’ve also been getting into making homebrew spells and even making some homebrew classes. I just like making everything, and some of it gets posted and some of it doesn’t.

What would you say is one of your favorite homebrew creations?

Ezfi: Well, one of my favorite magic items that I’ve posted is something called the pocket tree, which is a little orb. You bury it in the ground and then over 10 minutes it will sprout into a full-sized tree. But you can also remove [the orb] and bring [the tree] down to this shrunken size. If you build a treehouse in it, that will also shrink down. So, it functions as a mildly inconvenient storage unit that’s really good for taking out during long rests. You can have a kind of traveling base with it. I posted that [on Tiktok] and it was pretty well received.

It’s been really awesome talking to you. I appreciate you taking time out of your day for this.

Ezfi: Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity. This has been a blast.

Discover more homebrew on D&D Beyond

Enjoy the Noodle the Pug warlock subclass? There are more fun homebrew creations to discover. You can browse user-created homebrew creations here. Just be sure to talk to your Dungeon Master before using any homebrew with your characters.

Featured image credit: Ralf Designs from Pixabay

Michael Galvis (@michaelgalvis) is a tabletop content producer for D&D Beyond. He is a longtime Dungeon Master who enjoys horror films and all things fantasy and sci-fi. When he isn’t in the DM’s seat or rolling dice as his anxious halfling sorcerer, he’s playing League of Legends and Magic: The Gathering with his husband. They live together in Los Angeles with their adorable dog, Quentin.