So I'm pretty good friends with this girl who i recently taught the rules of D&D to, but she's really indecisive and can't make up her mind on anything. Example: While we were making her a character I explained races and classes and showed her the options in the PHB, Ebberon RFtLW, and VGtM, but she didn't know what to pick and asked me to do it. So I rolled some dice and said we would make her an elf monk, she said that sounded cool and we worked on making her a character. Afterwards I threw her and an npc (a character from a different campaign) into a tavern, and let her do whatever she liked. She had no idea how to rp or anything, and I kind of blame myself for being bad at explaining things but she seemed confused. So I decided to see if she would be better at combat by having the town get raided by bandits.. she rolled horribly for the most part and I felt like a jerk because for some reason the npc (they were both level 1) was rolling way better at everything. I feel like I gave her a bad first experience at D&D, even though she says she wants to play again I feel like I could be a better teacher. I invited her to a campaign that I'm a player in and she said yes, and I was wondering how we should go about character creation and gameplay next time we play. Any help would be appreciated.
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my name is not Bryce
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For every user who writes 5 paragraph essays as each of their posts: Remember to touch grass occasionally
Sometimes all that matters is that you provide a fun, supportive environment. Give your friend the very basics about how and when to roll dice, and then just let them learn by doing. As long as she's having fun and feels comfortable making mistakes, she'll learn the rest from observing the other players and by asking questions as needed. For most people, playing D&D is primarily about spending time with friends, rather than actually playing the game.
Beyond that, you can help her through character creation by asking her broad questions that frame the kind of experience she would like to have. For example, when choosing a race, you can ask how she imagines random townspeople reacting to her character. Are they warm and welcoming (Common race), curious and reserved (Uncommon race), or intimidated and suspicious (Monster race)? Depending on the choice, you can present a limited selection of options that should be easier to choose from.
When choosing classes, you can similarly ask how she imagines her allies will interact with her. Are they looking to her as a leader?(Party Face, Muscle) Do they go to her when they need help?(Support) Or do they trust her to be independent when the need arises? (Balanced, Stealth) etc... Again, based on the choice, provide a limited set of options.
The bottom line is that the memories we enjoy are based on the relationships we form, which are influenced by the choices we make along the way. Until new players become familiar with the system, you can explain their choices in terms of how it will make them feel abstractly, rather than in terms of the mechanics that get them there.
Rolling bad rolls doesn't make for a bad experience - how the DM handles it makes it positive or negative. On our first session, my wife rolled a crit fail. So, what do I do? Her character went for a haymaker swing with her longsword and the tip jammed on the roof of the cavern. The handle swung into her head and knocked her prone. She thought that was hilarious. That's how it worked well for my wife - you have to do what works for her to keep her interested. Bear in mind though that the rolls for the NPCs should be done behind the screen - and therefore could potentially be fudged if needed.
I'm not entirely sure what advice you are asking for. She enjoyed it enough (or enjoyed you? Who knows) to want a other round, so she didn't hate it and probably liked it well enough. She may have been confused, but D&D is a very complex game, she will be confused the first few times she plays. If you're worried about her indecision, the solution depends on her personality. She might respond well to pressure, or she might not. Alternatively, coaching her through the decision process may help. Or maybe she needs you to just give her time and space and not be rushed. You'll know better than us.
Personally, when I guide a new player through character creation, I go through a decision tree. Do you want to play as a person who fights with mundane weapons, as a sneak or a magic user? Then narrow it down further by similar questions until you get a class. Much easier thsn trying to explain the different mechanics of each class and hoping she understands enough to make an meaningful decision.
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If you're not willing or able to to discuss in good faith, then don't be surprised if I don't respond, there are better things in life for me to do than humour you. This signature is that response.
As Memnosyne has said, I would prioritize fun and having a good time with her. In my opinion, if she wants to play again with you, I think you have done a good job, so I would not be too hard on yourself. That being said, it is still good to be able to identify areas where you think you can improve upon and you have done that as well.
Show her only 3-5 specific options at most and let her choose from those. Often, the problem is “analysis paralysis” from too many options and not enough experience to understand the differences.
A new player might be better off with a pre-made character. And help them understand that they don't have to know a lot of rules to play. "Here is the situation. You have a spear and your wits. This is the pointy end. What would you like to do."
If you bog them down with rules, when they get to the role playing part, they might be thinking, "What are the rules for this? Is it my turn to talk?" when they should really be thinking, "There are no rules. I can do literally anything."
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So I'm pretty good friends with this girl who i recently taught the rules of D&D to, but she's really indecisive and can't make up her mind on anything. Example: While we were making her a character I explained races and classes and showed her the options in the PHB, Ebberon RFtLW, and VGtM, but she didn't know what to pick and asked me to do it. So I rolled some dice and said we would make her an elf monk, she said that sounded cool and we worked on making her a character. Afterwards I threw her and an npc (a character from a different campaign) into a tavern, and let her do whatever she liked. She had no idea how to rp or anything, and I kind of blame myself for being bad at explaining things but she seemed confused. So I decided to see if she would be better at combat by having the town get raided by bandits.. she rolled horribly for the most part and I felt like a jerk because for some reason the npc (they were both level 1) was rolling way better at everything. I feel like I gave her a bad first experience at D&D, even though she says she wants to play again I feel like I could be a better teacher. I invited her to a campaign that I'm a player in and she said yes, and I was wondering how we should go about character creation and gameplay next time we play. Any help would be appreciated.
my name is not Bryce
Actor
Certified Dark Sun enjoyer
usually on forum games and not contributing to conversations ¯\_ (ツ)_/
For every user who writes 5 paragraph essays as each of their posts: Remember to touch grass occasionally
Sometimes all that matters is that you provide a fun, supportive environment. Give your friend the very basics about how and when to roll dice, and then just let them learn by doing. As long as she's having fun and feels comfortable making mistakes, she'll learn the rest from observing the other players and by asking questions as needed. For most people, playing D&D is primarily about spending time with friends, rather than actually playing the game.
Beyond that, you can help her through character creation by asking her broad questions that frame the kind of experience she would like to have. For example, when choosing a race, you can ask how she imagines random townspeople reacting to her character. Are they warm and welcoming (Common race), curious and reserved (Uncommon race), or intimidated and suspicious (Monster race)? Depending on the choice, you can present a limited selection of options that should be easier to choose from.
When choosing classes, you can similarly ask how she imagines her allies will interact with her. Are they looking to her as a leader?(Party Face, Muscle) Do they go to her when they need help?(Support) Or do they trust her to be independent when the need arises? (Balanced, Stealth) etc... Again, based on the choice, provide a limited set of options.
The bottom line is that the memories we enjoy are based on the relationships we form, which are influenced by the choices we make along the way. Until new players become familiar with the system, you can explain their choices in terms of how it will make them feel abstractly, rather than in terms of the mechanics that get them there.
Rolling bad rolls doesn't make for a bad experience - how the DM handles it makes it positive or negative. On our first session, my wife rolled a crit fail. So, what do I do? Her character went for a haymaker swing with her longsword and the tip jammed on the roof of the cavern. The handle swung into her head and knocked her prone. She thought that was hilarious. That's how it worked well for my wife - you have to do what works for her to keep her interested. Bear in mind though that the rolls for the NPCs should be done behind the screen - and therefore could potentially be fudged if needed.
I'm not entirely sure what advice you are asking for. She enjoyed it enough (or enjoyed you? Who knows) to want a other round, so she didn't hate it and probably liked it well enough. She may have been confused, but D&D is a very complex game, she will be confused the first few times she plays. If you're worried about her indecision, the solution depends on her personality. She might respond well to pressure, or she might not. Alternatively, coaching her through the decision process may help. Or maybe she needs you to just give her time and space and not be rushed. You'll know better than us.
Personally, when I guide a new player through character creation, I go through a decision tree. Do you want to play as a person who fights with mundane weapons, as a sneak or a magic user? Then narrow it down further by similar questions until you get a class. Much easier thsn trying to explain the different mechanics of each class and hoping she understands enough to make an meaningful decision.
If you're not willing or able to to discuss in good faith, then don't be surprised if I don't respond, there are better things in life for me to do than humour you. This signature is that response.
This is actually very helpful, tysm!
my name is not Bryce
Actor
Certified Dark Sun enjoyer
usually on forum games and not contributing to conversations ¯\_ (ツ)_/
For every user who writes 5 paragraph essays as each of their posts: Remember to touch grass occasionally
As Memnosyne has said, I would prioritize fun and having a good time with her. In my opinion, if she wants to play again with you, I think you have done a good job, so I would not be too hard on yourself. That being said, it is still good to be able to identify areas where you think you can improve upon and you have done that as well.
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Show her only 3-5 specific options at most and let her choose from those. Often, the problem is “analysis paralysis” from too many options and not enough experience to understand the differences.
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A new player might be better off with a pre-made character. And help them understand that they don't have to know a lot of rules to play. "Here is the situation. You have a spear and your wits. This is the pointy end. What would you like to do."
If you bog them down with rules, when they get to the role playing part, they might be thinking, "What are the rules for this? Is it my turn to talk?" when they should really be thinking, "There are no rules. I can do literally anything."