Walked in to a volcano that was about to erupt. We were told (I was a player at the time) several times over several sessions that the volcano was rumbling more and more, belching smoke and ash, etc. We decided it was a misdirect and in order to save the village we should go IN to the volcano and stop whatever was making it erupt. Turns out regular old seismic activity was making it erupt and it blew its top with us in the caldera. Instant TPK, lol
I have a very silly group of teenagers as my party and most of what they do is stupid. From hiding behind a singular mop, rizzing up fire snakes, to jumping into the mouth of a purple worm is always interesting. There is one that takes the cake though.
In my first campaign the players had to defeat a group of goblins pestering the local town. Little did they know that the goblins were serving a warlock who was responsible for the possession of a beloved NPC. They really liked the npc, so they brutally killed most of the goblins. One of the characters (he went by the name Shrek McQueen) wanted to really show the goblins that he was superior. Keep in mind that he was an oath of devotion paladin. He captured one of the goblins and took it back to the town and called a meeting. In front of everyone in the town he decided to “assert dominance” on the poor goblin by making an animal handling check to ride it. He failed and the goblin clubbed him. Shrek McQueen didn’t consider the fact that he was at 3hp and that the party didn’t have a cleric at the moment, so yeah he died.
Also yes my signature did happen
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When in doubt throw the naked, fingerless, thief that you’ve been keeping in a sack and feeding rotten squirrels to into the fireworks tent hoping that it causes an explosion.
Thunderwave in a castle they just snuck in with succesful Stealth checks, immediately pulling everything in the vicinity.
I had to cut off the session to make a decent prep for a wave after wave combat
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"Time, like hope, is an illusion" - Lumalee "Time is relative" - Albert Einstein "It's a joke. It's all a joke. Mother forgive me" - Edward 'The Comedian' Blake "Do I look like the kind of clown that can start a movement?" - Arthur Fleck
Session 1 immediately burns down a tavern for not having there advertised free food. (One of the members was a pyromaniac). Unfortunately, they did it in the one town that had a trait made up for them that there was a spider pit. They learned this after they were pushed in there to die. They didn't die though=, just escaped.
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Monster Fact of the Day: Tarrasque
Tarrasque's have a magical regeneration and are able to reflect spells back at its enemies
Praise Jeff with Your Hole Heart and Soul with the Sign ofDoomJOY to Come!!!!!
I dont have any ones from my dming times but as a player my fellow party members decided to strip in a honey pit. It was pure chaos. Then the wizard cast fireball killing me. Stupid but it was what taught me nothing matters in dnd, just have fun.
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Your not worthless, your heart can sell for millions on the dark web.
One time my players were in the a town and we were probably 3-4 hours into our FIRST session and I was planning the campain to the whole summer but instead they immedietly cheesed the campain got there memories back and left.
so annoying but funniest thing ever
( i was playing the same campain as the user obove me and i was the wizard that killed him)
At the beginning of a run through of Tyranny of Dragons, the paladin asked to make an investigation check, completely out of the blue. I said sure and he rolled a fifteen, it was then that i asked what it was he was looking for. he said he was looking for a barrel. I say you find one but why? he GETS N THE BARREL, ROLLS TOWRD A GROUP OF COBALDS AND EATS. THEM. ALL.
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Player Quotes: "Any snac- I mean KOBALDS nearby?" -Olivander the Phycopathic paladin
Stole an Amulet of the Planes from an NPC helping us (but costing us a lot of resources every time they helped). I got tired of the steeper price and my warlock took the amulet before jumping away with our small party. We ended up in a snow covered mountain sliding down, then went to a plane with a lot of rock ore and fire, then ended up in some jungles that might have been Chult, then to an air plane where we fell until we could link up and pop back to material again, this time with a decently close roll to our home city. We soon learned this was not an item for low level adventurers. We tracked down the NPC and gave it back with apologies and never saw them again. It was a wild ride and something we still laugh about around the table of shenanigans three campaigns ago!
My party of chaos gremlins had just started Stormwreck Isle, and they were on the boat to get there. Of course, halfway through the voyage, the druid jumps in the water. I had created bright pink aquatic chihuahuas solely for this due to the fact I knew this would happen, as the entire party was criminally insane, and belonged in the town jail after what they did to the poor halfling in the tavern prior to this event. The druid with 9hp got crit for max damage by one of them, and was knocked unconscious in the water. The rest of the party formed a humanoid chain to pull them out, and they all just kept hanging off the side of the boat until the person at the top failed a Strength check and they all fell in. The party swam the rest of the way to Stormwreck Isle, taking turns carrying the unconscious druid, who woke up once they got to shore (by some miracle) and the Rogue and Ranger started clobbering the druid with fish. Then, they spend an entire 2hr session fighting 3 zombies with the same fish. One of the zombies had a bag of holding, which the party filled with more fish. They then go to meet Runara, the druid still being clobbered with fish.
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Hi all, I'm Druid_Girl31, but please call me Druid. I am (a/an) CERTIFIED INSOMNIAC, PAN, alterhuman,BADDD DM, and obsessed with HAMILTON! Why? I'm just cool like that!
My party had just come across a magical bottomless pit. The pit forced any player who approached it to make DC10 wisdom saves or be compelled to toss their stuff in. Every turn they got the chance to reroll, if they failed they tossed more stuff in. Once they ran out of stuff they tossed themselves in.
The idiots spent 30 minutes failing the wisdom saves and trying to toss themselves with only one player holding everybody else out of the pit. After that they finally left the hole. Missing about half of their stuff. LOL. Later in the dungeons one of the players received some wine as a gift from a satyr. This player, role playing as a very anti alcohol cleric, went back to the pit and tossed the wine in. He failed his wisdom save, the rest of the party tried to save him. And the whole thing started over again for about 20 minutes more.
(The pit wasn't bottomless, it was magically linked to a hoard of goblin's lair so they got all the loot)
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Hi! do any of you have any stupid D&D stories? I would love to hear them!!
Player Quotes: "Any snac- I mean KOBALDS nearby?" -Olivander the Phycopathic paladin
Walked in to a volcano that was about to erupt. We were told (I was a player at the time) several times over several sessions that the volcano was rumbling more and more, belching smoke and ash, etc. We decided it was a misdirect and in order to save the village we should go IN to the volcano and stop whatever was making it erupt. Turns out regular old seismic activity was making it erupt and it blew its top with us in the caldera. Instant TPK, lol
I have a very silly group of teenagers as my party and most of what they do is stupid. From hiding behind a singular mop, rizzing up fire snakes, to jumping into the mouth of a purple worm is always interesting. There is one that takes the cake though.
In my first campaign the players had to defeat a group of goblins pestering the local town. Little did they know that the goblins were serving a warlock who was responsible for the possession of a beloved NPC. They really liked the npc, so they brutally killed most of the goblins. One of the characters (he went by the name Shrek McQueen) wanted to really show the goblins that he was superior. Keep in mind that he was an oath of devotion paladin. He captured one of the goblins and took it back to the town and called a meeting. In front of everyone in the town he decided to “assert dominance” on the poor goblin by making an animal handling check to ride it. He failed and the goblin clubbed him. Shrek McQueen didn’t consider the fact that he was at 3hp and that the party didn’t have a cleric at the moment, so yeah he died.
Also yes my signature did happen
When in doubt throw the naked, fingerless, thief that you’ve been keeping in a sack and feeding rotten squirrels to into the fireworks tent hoping that it causes an explosion.
Wow ok these are funny!! And lego, W H A T?!?!
Player Quotes: "Any snac- I mean KOBALDS nearby?" -Olivander the Phycopathic paladin
Thunderwave in a castle they just snuck in with succesful Stealth checks, immediately pulling everything in the vicinity.
I had to cut off the session to make a decent prep for a wave after wave combat
"Time, like hope, is an illusion" - Lumalee
"Time is relative" - Albert Einstein
"It's a joke. It's all a joke. Mother forgive me" - Edward 'The Comedian' Blake
"Do I look like the kind of clown that can start a movement?" - Arthur Fleck
Session 1 immediately burns down a tavern for not having there advertised free food. (One of the members was a pyromaniac). Unfortunately, they did it in the one town that had a trait made up for them that there was a spider pit. They learned this after they were pushed in there to die. They didn't die though=, just escaped.
Monster Fact of the Day: Tarrasque
Tarrasque's have a magical regeneration and are able to reflect spells back at its enemies
Praise Jeff with Your Hole Heart and Soul with the Sign of
DoomJOY to Come!!!!!I dont have any ones from my dming times but as a player my fellow party members decided to strip in a honey pit. It was pure chaos. Then the wizard cast fireball killing me. Stupid but it was what taught me nothing matters in dnd, just have fun.
Your not worthless, your heart can sell for millions on the dark web.
PM me the word 🍅tomato or 🍌banana
One time my players were in the a town and we were probably 3-4 hours into our FIRST session and I was planning the campain to the whole summer but instead they immedietly cheesed the campain got there memories back and left.
so annoying but funniest thing ever
( i was playing the same campain as the user obove me and i was the wizard that killed him)
At the beginning of a run through of Tyranny of Dragons, the paladin asked to make an investigation check, completely out of the blue. I said sure and he rolled a fifteen, it was then that i asked what it was he was looking for. he said he was looking for a barrel. I say you find one but why? he GETS N THE BARREL, ROLLS TOWRD A GROUP OF COBALDS AND EATS. THEM. ALL.
Player Quotes: "Any snac- I mean KOBALDS nearby?" -Olivander the Phycopathic paladin
Not my party. Just me in the party. We were fighting a dragon.
It was calm at first. Our bard got lippy and passed him off. So I had to take action!
I convinced the dragon to just eat me instead. Free lunch! The dragon promptly gobbled me up. That's when I used an immovable rod in it's throat.
That was a dead dragon soon after. Not by the players. It was because I put it on his throat that created a gag reflex and he choked to death.
A win is a win
Stole an Amulet of the Planes from an NPC helping us (but costing us a lot of resources every time they helped). I got tired of the steeper price and my warlock took the amulet before jumping away with our small party. We ended up in a snow covered mountain sliding down, then went to a plane with a lot of rock ore and fire, then ended up in some jungles that might have been Chult, then to an air plane where we fell until we could link up and pop back to material again, this time with a decently close roll to our home city. We soon learned this was not an item for low level adventurers. We tracked down the NPC and gave it back with apologies and never saw them again. It was a wild ride and something we still laugh about around the table of shenanigans three campaigns ago!
My party of chaos gremlins had just started Stormwreck Isle, and they were on the boat to get there. Of course, halfway through the voyage, the druid jumps in the water. I had created bright pink aquatic chihuahuas solely for this due to the fact I knew this would happen, as the entire party was criminally insane, and belonged in the town jail after what they did to the poor halfling in the tavern prior to this event. The druid with 9hp got crit for max damage by one of them, and was knocked unconscious in the water. The rest of the party formed a humanoid chain to pull them out, and they all just kept hanging off the side of the boat until the person at the top failed a Strength check and they all fell in. The party swam the rest of the way to Stormwreck Isle, taking turns carrying the unconscious druid, who woke up once they got to shore (by some miracle) and the Rogue and Ranger started clobbering the druid with fish. Then, they spend an entire 2hr session fighting 3 zombies with the same fish. One of the zombies had a bag of holding, which the party filled with more fish. They then go to meet Runara, the druid still being clobbered with fish.
Hi all, I'm Druid_Girl31, but please call me Druid. I am (a/an) CERTIFIED INSOMNIAC, PAN, alterhuman, BADDD DM, and obsessed with HAMILTON! Why? I'm just cool like that!
She/her pronouns please. TITLES: Savior of the Woods by Drummer! Send me a PM! PRAISE JEFF! Join the Hamilton Cult! Hate on Gen Alpha Slang! <--- ( all links)
I lost any measure of sanity I ever had a long time ago!
My party had just come across a magical bottomless pit. The pit forced any player who approached it to make DC10 wisdom saves or be compelled to toss their stuff in. Every turn they got the chance to reroll, if they failed they tossed more stuff in. Once they ran out of stuff they tossed themselves in.
The idiots spent 30 minutes failing the wisdom saves and trying to toss themselves with only one player holding everybody else out of the pit. After that they finally left the hole. Missing about half of their stuff. LOL. Later in the dungeons one of the players received some wine as a gift from a satyr. This player, role playing as a very anti alcohol cleric, went back to the pit and tossed the wine in. He failed his wisdom save, the rest of the party tried to save him. And the whole thing started over again for about 20 minutes more.
(The pit wasn't bottomless, it was magically linked to a hoard of goblin's lair so they got all the loot)