I used to play in a LARPG loosely based on D&D, but I stopped four years ago. If I ever start playing in that association again, I would play as the same character. Obviously, I'm not talking about the near future, what with the current pandemic. Explaining his long absence is conveniently easy. On my last campaign (a campaign is a gaming session lasting 48 hours that takes place on a weekend), the campaign took place in Hell and I had decided that he was now trapped there, unable to go back (which makes perfect sense with what happened in-game). In between the last two campaigns, my human character had become a demon (he still looks human though). I won't go into details on how it happened but it makes sense in my character's convoluted story and I got permission from the organizers. I actually based my character's transformation to a demon on Supernatural lore.

So if I ever come back to play as my character, I would have to explain how he managed to escape Hell. But there is a problem. In that world, Hell and the Abyss are taken directly from D&D lore. This means that my character has been held captive by devils and tortured all this time for their entertainment. If I came back, I would like to play my character as if he was suffering from PTSD, but he would still be a demon. I prefer this than going for the revenge route in order to facilitate his inclusion in any new campaign. The way how this association works is that each campaign is its own thing (although sometimes there are sequels), but they all take place in the same world and in chronological order. As long as it can be explained, players can always use the same character. Some prefer to rotate characters depending on the setting, but others like me prefer to find a reason for the same character to be there.

The consequences of said PTSD is that my character would be terrorized not only by devils but by violence as well, as it would remind him of his years of constant torture. This means that even if I'm playing a chaotic evil character, I can easily work in a group, hence why it works in any setting. I would be a harmless demon, completely broken and incapable of doing any harm. In D&D lore, does it make sense for a demon to be scared of violence and to cry and ask for mercy against anyone who wants to harm him? How do you think other characters would react if they discovered their traumatized companion is a demon? The setting is closest to the Forgotten Realms one. Things like the geographical world map and pantheon of gods are different, but some elements are the same, e.g. Lolth is present and is a goddess, devils and demons are enemies, it's medieval fantasy, etc. Most organizers and world builders are D&D players and it shows.

Let me reverse the question - do you think it is possible to be a demon and NOT have PTSD?

But I don't think you understand what PTSD is.   It makes you more violent, not less due to increased arousal:

• Re-experiencing the trauma through intrusive distressing recollections of the event, flashbacks, and nightmares.
• Emotional numbness and avoidance of places, people, and activities that are reminders of the trauma.
• Increased arousal such as difficulty sleeping and concentrating, feeling jumpy, and being easily irritated and angered.

Also, I personally would change a creature's alignment if it was scared of violence.    Alignments are not supposed to be labels to allow the Good guys to kill without feeling bad, they are supposed to reflect what you are willing to do.

I do know what PTSD is, believe me.

• Re-experiencing the trauma through intrusive distressing recollections of the event, flashbacks, and nightmares.

I know that. I would role play it by constantly feeling uneasy when left alone and nothing interesting is happening (people would see me act strange from a distance) and by faking agitation during sleep (whenever I'm not sound asleep in my tent, I'd just moan and move a lot).

• Emotional numbness and avoidance of places, people, and activities that are reminders of the trauma.

I also know that. It also contradicts what you said about PTSD making you more violent. If things that remind you of your trauma are people fighting, torture, blood, basically anything involving violence, then yes it makes you less violent.

• Increased arousal such as difficulty sleeping and concentrating, feeling jumpy, and being easily irritated and angered.

Again, I know that. Role playing the jumpiness is my favorite part. I would constantly be on the lookout and freak out at bushes moving in the wind, someone innocently touching my shoulder ("Don't touch me!"), sudden loud noises, etc. Irritation and anger aren't the same thing as violence.

As for his alignment, demons are the very manifestation of chaotic evil so changing it is out of the question because it would no longer be a demon. He's still chaotic evil, he doesn't give a shit about his companions, he has zero scruples and nothing is more important than himself. The thing is, he was broken by years of constant torture. He would still be able to defend himself when necessary (although he'd rather avoid fighting altogether), but if captured he would be terrorized and begging for mercy (I might even go into a fetal position and cradle myself), and it wouldn't be an act of trickery.

So do you think such a character makes sense in D&D lore? And how do you think other characters would react if they discovered that their traumatized companion is a demon?

Quote from Kotath >>

You are missing that violence is an avoidance mechanism. Violence is not normally something people react to by saying 'Aww, he looks so cute beating those people up,'  or at least sane people do not react to violence that way. Someone with PTSD could react by withdrawing inwards, but they could also lash outwards, especially if the withdrawl does not seem to be working.

You're right, although one could argue that the "violence is cute" part applies differently to demons. As for when withdrawal fails, I did say that "he would still be able to defend himself when necessary" but that "he'd rather avoid fighting altogether". In a situation where he's captured, restrained and disarmed however, it would certainly remind him of his torture at the hands of the devils. It would make sense for my character in such a situation to tremble uncontrollably and beg for mercy. If torture appeared to follow, he'd go into total mental breakdown. But is such a behavior even normal for a demon? Are they immune or resistant to it? I know they can feel fear, otherwise they'd all be immune to the frightened condition, but can a demon even be broken and severally traumatized? Forget about PTSD, so far we've only gone offtrack by arguing about PTSD itself, which I want to avoid.

Let's say the organizers are fine with my character's development, which honestly would have to be expected considering all the crazier things they accepted as canon before. I can't be so certain when it comes to other players. What I'm really concerned about isn't if my character's companions would turn against him upon discovering that he's a demon, but if the players themselves would feel like the situation itself is absurd and contrary to established lore. I want to avoid other players from breaking their immersion and meta-complaining. I don't want them to argue that "a demon would never act like that".

I just want to chime in here on behalf of people who suffer from PTSD. PTSD does not by default make someone more violent. While violence can sometimes be a side effect of other more common symptoms of PTSD, it is not necessarily an outcome. There are many, many people who have severe PTSD and exhibit no violent inclinations or behavior whatsoever. It can in many cases lean much more toward the 'flight' response and withdrawal just as much as irritability, anger, frustration, etc.

Quote from BigHeartedGuy >>

I just want to chime in here on behalf of people who suffer from PTSD. PTSD does not by default make someone more violent. While violence can sometimes be a side effect of other more common symptoms of PTSD, it is not necessarily an outcome. There are many, many people who have severe PTSD and exhibit no violent inclinations or behavior whatsoever. It can in many cases lean much more toward the 'flight' response and withdrawal just as much as irritability, anger, frustration, etc.

 Thank you (because I agree), but I'd rather not this topic go offtrack by having it become a discussion about PTSD itself. Can we please talk about my demon's situation?

Quote from Kotath >>

Soundtrack by Green Day: Tiefling of Suburbia

 What? I had to Google that to get the reference and I'm still what? Can we go back on-topic now?

If you really want to roleplay PTST authentically, the “jumpsies” are mostly only occasional, usually when triggered. But the real thing... 

The sudden and unexpected adrenaline dumps that leave your heart racing in your chest like you just ran a mile, and leave a little tremor in your hands.

The spending hours by yourself with your back against a solid wall and full view to all of the doors and windows....

The getting lost in your own head until you’re somewhere else and you get that vacant stare. Sometimes it’s hard for people to get your attention for a minute.

When they do get your attention, you’re about 1/3 likely to jumpsacare like at a cheap horror movie, and 1/3 likely to just swing. It’s not that you’re more violent, it’s just that your ready to fight for your life at that moment when they get your attention, and about 1/3 likely to just go “Hunh?” because you were miles away years ago at that moment. 

It’s the nightmares, and the sudden overwhelming urges to cry.

It’s the random taste of concrete dust that you just can’t ever quite get out of your mouth sometimes l, or that familiar coppery smell that you just can’t get out of your nose. Even when nothing has exploded around you in a very long time.

Did I mention the nightmares? Where someone has to wake you up because you were choking in your sleep. Or where you wake up hitting the person next to you in your sleep. Or when you wake up and are relieved because you woke up before you died this time.

Have fun with roleplaying that.

Quote from Kotath >>

If you do not know the album or understand how it could relate to your character, no worries. However, you seem to be asking advice regarding a character concept and then getting upset when people discuss their take on aspects of said concept. When your concept is that strong in your head, what do you need us for? You seem to have a strong character concept in your head already.

Maybe I wasn't really clear in my first post. The point of this thread is that I want to know if my character makes sense in D&D lore. Let's say an official book is released in which a character like mine is described, would readers, who are D&D veterans, think that it makes sense or would they be annoyed because it contradicts previously established lore? Although I appreciate suggestions on how to roleplay my character (like the previous poster's), I didn't make this thread with the intention of asking for help on that matter. What I meant by "Can a demon have PTSD?" is does it make sense in established D&D lore for a demon to have PTSD like described in my first post?

Quote from Kotath >> 

Lore varies by world though and even then by individual DM. In my normal campaign world, for example, PTSD would not make sense for demons since full demons do not have that level of free will. A tiefling with PTSD would make perfect sense though and a character such as yours that was actually a human, suffered in Hell (regardless of physical form there) and escaped? Not only reasonable but expected. Although technically it should be a Devil in Hell rather than a Demon? Or has 5e changed all the terminology again? If an actual demon was in Hell and had enough free will to develop PTSD, their triggers would be any form of law enforcement. Even any hint of rules would set them off, regardless of how the PTSD manifested. But that is my world... 

Thank you, this is the kind of response I've been looking for! Considering it's a LARPG, the fact that it varies by DM can't really apply. There is no DM in a LARPG, every player is required to arbitrate themselves and the rules are made in such a way that you don't need a DM following every player. This is why I'm talking about in general. The closest D&D setting to that game's is Forgotten Realms as it's its primary inspiration. The world builders also pretty much copy pasted the MM and DMG when it came to create demons of the Abyss and devils of Hell. As I previously said, I expect the organizers to accept my interpretation of demon lore as canon, but I can't expect every single player from accepting it. Basically, if the idea of a demon acting like that is something that would be acceptable on most D&D tables, then I might go with it and play it like that. Otherwise I'd have to find an excuse to turn him back into a human, but that would feel cheap considering the one thing that can do that (his soul) is seemingly lost forever.

As for why my character became a demon instead of a devil while being in Hell, that's because his natural alignment is chaotic neutral. He's against tyranny and usually fights for the greater good, but he does have a dark side. And no, 5e didn't change the terminology and I totally didn't base my character's transformation on D&D lore. I'll try my best to explain it without going into too much details (seriously, my character's convoluted story is longer than a novella and it's not an exaggeration). My character comes from another world where magic is nonexistent, something happened and he was transferred to the game's world. He was supposed to be given a soul (it's kind of like a passport) in order to convert him for the new world, but something went terribly wrong and he was instead sent directly to Hell without a soul. Without a soul, his body was left unprotected from the corruption of Hell, but his alignment prevented him form turning into a devil and so he was transformed to the closest thing: a demon. Demon invaders were also present at the time, as a rift from the Abyss was open, which may or may not have helped. He got a soul before his transformation to a demon was completed, but he eventually lost it a few years later. This triggered his complete transformation even though he was now on the mortal plane. His quest led him to Hell again and that's when he was captured and trapped.

My character interacted with both types of fiends in-game and I can definitely affirm that they have free will. Some were even "friendly" (i.e. not hostile unless attacked). Most horned devils were extremely and absurdly friendly, their goal being to make PCs sign a contract with them. Lesser devils weren't talkative and always hostile, so they could have been mindless monsters. Most demons were hostile, some were very powerful and others much less so. One was even friendly, he was disguised as a human wizard (most players ignored that until after the game) and offered protection and shelter to adventurers in exchange of missions to undermine the devils. Another demon called himself a buffoon and forced PCs to complete an obstacle course meant to test their greed, losing meant forsaking their soul. Some demons preferred indirect confrontation by possessing PCs and causing chaos among them.

I don't like the idea of rules triggering my character's PTSD because rules aren't the cause of his trauma, torture is.

What I meant by not having a DM around is that unlike at a table, players can't rely on "word of god" (i.e. DM) telling them what works and doesn't work. If I join a table with a character that completely contradicts the game's world, the DM will intervene and say no. In a LARPG, you don't have that. Each player might have their own interpretation of what is and isn't possible lore-wise and you don't have a DM to tell them what works and doesn't work during the game. I've had trouble in the past because of this, I introduced a controversial element into canon that many players detested. It doesn't matter that I actually took inspiration from the lore found on the association's website, not all players read it nor cared and many could have interpreted it differently. The players I had trouble with were mostly D&D purists. I took care of the problem and began to underplay that element, and those same players stopped complaining.

I'm not sure what you mean by this: So it comes down to whether your fellow players would accept the concept of a demon who rather than accept their home 'because demon' was instead traumatized and fled to the Earth.

I put the part I'm having more trouble understanding in bold. If by home you mean the Abyss, my character has never actually been there. He also doesn't care about his new kin, but that isn't strange considering demons aren't loyal to each other anyway. He only cares about himself and is happy to be a demon because now he no longer feels any guilt and he believes that his old self was weak and stupid for caring about the innocent. When he lost his soul, he sensed something was wrong and luckily a priestess was nearby to tell him that he was transforming into a demon. He obviously didn't want that and thankfully he had in his possession a phylactery containing a maiden's pure soul. With help from the priestess, he allowed himself to be possessed by this soul, but considering the maiden was a friend and needed his help to get back to her body, she allowed him to retain free will. This allowed him to remain sane, he was a demon but didn't act like one. If during the game someone had cast a detection spell on him (which actually happened), depending on the spell it would reveal that he's a demon or that he's possessed (there's a spell for detecting someone's true race and another for possession). This obviously caused a lot of misunderstandings. Someone with good intentions cast a spell to stop the possession, thus freeing his demon's side. Not wanting to go back to being a weakling, my character got rid of his phylactery.

As for him fleeing to the "Earth" (it's not called Earth in that game's world) instead of the Abyss, like I said he doesn't care about the Abyss and it's not like a portal to the Abyss was easily accessible. But even if he had the choice between the Abyss and the material plane, he would have chosen the latter because the Abyss is a dangerous place with tons of violent and sadistic demons, which is something he wanted to flee at all cost due to his trauma. And don't forget the fact that other demons might laugh at him for turning into a weakling and put him out of his misery. The material plane is much safer and also a place he knows well, which is reassuring to him. Actually, now that I'm thinking about it, the most logical way for my character to escape would be that a friend found a way to save him by doing a summoning ritual, so it's not like he would have a choice, but he'd certainly be very grateful to that person.