[The Poll is just a talking point. Don't worry about it.]
Those who frequent these forums are all too familiar with the psuedo-controversial threads that spiral out of control. Invariably, a handful of participants are at the core of a discussion that circles fruitlessly for days or weeks while others try to chime in (more or less) helpfully without much effect. Eventually, there are so many pages that new participants are unable to follow along and feel inclined to rehash exhausted points, which just feeds into a growing pool of frustration. So, what's the point?
Why are you here?
(Scenario) Someone asks a question. You provide an opinion. Someone else disagrees. Cool, OP has insight from multiple perspectives and can come to their own conclusion.
Was the dissenting opinion harmful or egregiously misleading? Ok, then it might be worth responding with a focused, carefully worded, and (ideally) externally supported follow-up.
If after presenting your position and addressing the rebuttal there is still disagreement, how likely are you to actually change anyone's mind. Is the OP even paying attention anymore? Do you care?
At what point can you say "I've achieved what I came here to do" and be satisfied?
~~~
If your goal is to be "helpful for the original prompt", then odds are you can achieve your goal in 1~2 posts and anything more will have diminishing returns at best, and be counterproductive at worst. (If you find something significant, such as a relevant SageAdvice, or errata, then that's great.)
If your goal is to "change someone's mind", then it will likely be clear whether that's even possible after just a few exchanges, and unless that person is the OP, it may be worth starting a new thread or moving entirely to private messages.
If your goal is simply to "engage in a discussion for the fun of it", then that's great, but make sure that everyone else is having fun too.
~~~
My hope is that this thread will remind those who read it to consider what kind of experience they want to cultivate in the DNDBeyond forums and to actively keep it in mind while they engage with others. Both for the community's benefit, and for the reader's peace of mind. To that end, here are some discussion prompts:
A) What types of posts tend to frustrate you the most?
B) How do you like to be disagreed with?
C) What bad habits are you are working on?
D) What can others do to make you feel heard and respected?
I don’t know about others but for me the first two options pretty well cover my postings. As for the discussion prompts - A) insulting and condescending posts or those with a very nasty tone. B) generally on matters of opinion I don’t have a problem as long as you are willing to allow me my opinion as well. On matters of fact I don’t like to be corrected (who does) but if deserved I’ m generally good about accepting it (or at least I like to think I am). After forty years of play and 5 editions I do get edition rules mixed up from time to time. C) like most of the frequent posters here I’m fairly certain I’m right 100% of the time even if It’s only 95% 😳😁. D) thanks and quotes and agreements are all nice ways to show appreciation.
I think I do more reading than posting. Helping folks is a big draw to post but there at least a half dozen other very qualified people that beat me to it.
Other than that I enjoy playing in the PBP forums when I can.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"Sooner or later, your Players are going to smash your railroad into a sandbox."
-Vedexent
"real life is a super high CR."
-OboeLauren
"............anybody got any potatoes? We could drop a potato in each hole an' see which ones get viciously mauled by horrible monsters?"
At the moment, I'm mostly just doing it for the titles, to be honest. Of course, I try to be helpful with my posts as well, generally, as it'd be rude if I wasn't.
What bugs me the most are the comments that go something like this:
"Before I arrived, someone said something wrong that required a lot of work to fully counter. And then someone took the time and countered it. I'm not reading all that though. Time to say the wrong thing again!"
I'm trying to shut up in controversial threads lately. Been warned by mods, and I don't want to lose access to my PbP game. Plus it really doesn't do anything good, for me or for anyone else. I think I used to be good at debate, at one point in my life, but what I'm realizing lately is that I'm just not anymore. Whenever I try to make a point to someone I know, I kinda flub the delivery. And online it isn't much better. Whatever. It truly doesn't matter. It's not something anyone wants from me anyway.
It's just the form of interaction that compels. The one that makes me want to come back and keep doing it for no good reason.
I post on forums mainly to learn and help others. To entertain my passion for D&D and to also share ideas, concept and keeping myself informed with news, rules element or combination i don't commonly see etc.. Funnily, debates often let me see different take people might have and even help after at my table. I like to say that i discuss more here so i can discuss less at my table since i don't debate rules at length during play. ☺
A) Varies. I go somewhere else when the thread seems bothersome. B) In my signature, it states, "My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong." C) Posting when I'm not feeling my best, physically or mentally. D) Nothing. My voice isn't so important to need to acknowledgement. High view counts give me the creeps, and I turn them off when I can.
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
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[The Poll is just a talking point. Don't worry about it.]
Those who frequent these forums are all too familiar with the psuedo-controversial threads that spiral out of control. Invariably, a handful of participants are at the core of a discussion that circles fruitlessly for days or weeks while others try to chime in (more or less) helpfully without much effect. Eventually, there are so many pages that new participants are unable to follow along and feel inclined to rehash exhausted points, which just feeds into a growing pool of frustration. So, what's the point?
Why are you here?
(Scenario) Someone asks a question. You provide an opinion. Someone else disagrees. Cool, OP has insight from multiple perspectives and can come to their own conclusion.
Was the dissenting opinion harmful or egregiously misleading? Ok, then it might be worth responding with a focused, carefully worded, and (ideally) externally supported follow-up.
If after presenting your position and addressing the rebuttal there is still disagreement, how likely are you to actually change anyone's mind. Is the OP even paying attention anymore? Do you care?
At what point can you say "I've achieved what I came here to do" and be satisfied?
~~~
If your goal is to be "helpful for the original prompt", then odds are you can achieve your goal in 1~2 posts and anything more will have diminishing returns at best, and be counterproductive at worst. (If you find something significant, such as a relevant SageAdvice, or errata, then that's great.)
If your goal is to "change someone's mind", then it will likely be clear whether that's even possible after just a few exchanges, and unless that person is the OP, it may be worth starting a new thread or moving entirely to private messages.
If your goal is simply to "engage in a discussion for the fun of it", then that's great, but make sure that everyone else is having fun too.
~~~
My hope is that this thread will remind those who read it to consider what kind of experience they want to cultivate in the DNDBeyond forums and to actively keep it in mind while they engage with others. Both for the community's benefit, and for the reader's peace of mind. To that end, here are some discussion prompts:
A) What types of posts tend to frustrate you the most?
B) How do you like to be disagreed with?
C) What bad habits are you are working on?
D) What can others do to make you feel heard and respected?
I don’t know about others but for me the first two options pretty well cover my postings. As for the discussion prompts -
A) insulting and condescending posts or those with a very nasty tone.
B) generally on matters of opinion I don’t have a problem as long as you are willing to allow me my opinion as well. On matters of fact I don’t like to be corrected (who does) but if deserved I’ m generally good about accepting it (or at least I like to think I am). After forty years of play and 5 editions I do get edition rules mixed up from time to time.
C) like most of the frequent posters here I’m fairly certain I’m right 100% of the time even if It’s only 95% 😳😁.
D) thanks and quotes and agreements are all nice ways to show appreciation.
Wisea$$ DM and Player since 1979.
I do it for all of the first three options, but primarily I do it to help people who need help. Especially help with their homebrews.
Creating Epic Boons on DDB
DDB Buyers' Guide
Hardcovers, DDB & You
Content Troubleshooting
I think I do more reading than posting. Helping folks is a big draw to post but there at least a half dozen other very qualified people that beat me to it.
Other than that I enjoy playing in the PBP forums when I can.
"Sooner or later, your Players are going to smash your railroad into a sandbox."
-Vedexent
"real life is a super high CR."
-OboeLauren
"............anybody got any potatoes? We could drop a potato in each hole an' see which ones get viciously mauled by horrible monsters?"
-Ilyara Thundertale
At the moment, I'm mostly just doing it for the titles, to be honest. Of course, I try to be helpful with my posts as well, generally, as it'd be rude if I wasn't.
What bugs me the most are the comments that go something like this:
"Before I arrived, someone said something wrong that required a lot of work to fully counter. And then someone took the time and countered it. I'm not reading all that though. Time to say the wrong thing again!"
I'm trying to shut up in controversial threads lately. Been warned by mods, and I don't want to lose access to my PbP game. Plus it really doesn't do anything good, for me or for anyone else. I think I used to be good at debate, at one point in my life, but what I'm realizing lately is that I'm just not anymore. Whenever I try to make a point to someone I know, I kinda flub the delivery. And online it isn't much better. Whatever. It truly doesn't matter. It's not something anyone wants from me anyway.
It's just the form of interaction that compels. The one that makes me want to come back and keep doing it for no good reason.
I post on forums mainly to learn and help others. To entertain my passion for D&D and to also share ideas, concept and keeping myself informed with news, rules element or combination i don't commonly see etc.. Funnily, debates often let me see different take people might have and even help after at my table. I like to say that i discuss more here so i can discuss less at my table since i don't debate rules at length during play. ☺
I play games. I don’t think I do anything else here.
A) Varies. I go somewhere else when the thread seems bothersome.
B) In my signature, it states, "My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong."
C) Posting when I'm not feeling my best, physically or mentally.
D) Nothing. My voice isn't so important to need to acknowledgement. High view counts give me the creeps, and I turn them off when I can.
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.