I'm relatively new to D&D, I've only been playing for a few months. I play with two different groups of friends. In one group we have really awesome and immersive roleplay, and everyone has a lot of fun playing their characters. In the other group, not so much. Everyone tends to call each other by their real names instead of speaking as their characters, and there isn't much in the way of character interaction. I know everyone plays D&D differently, but roleplaying is half the fun of the game! Any tips on how to encourage other people in the group to let loose and get into it a little more?
I agree, groups that Roleplay are definitely more enjoyable! That said, one of things I learnt quickly when dealing with newer players is sometimes they just aren't comfortable being that vulnerable in a group - and that's perfectly ok. It's easier for me coming from an acting/improv background where you are used to being vulnerable (or in the case of Improv, looking stupid). For others, it can take time to get used to it.
I would definitely check out these videos - start with the one from Matt Mercer, then check out the other from Matt Colville. The second video is on a different subject but I would point you to a specific bit - 2:04 - 3:33 goes into a bit about newer players and roleplay, and additionally covers perhaps one of the most important lessons I've ever learnt as a DM: If the players had fun, you did your job.
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To a lot of people, the fun is to roll dice, kill stuff, get loot, and level up. Not everyone wants to RP, and not everyone wants to, or feels comfortable, speaking in character. As a DM, you need to be aware of your players' preferences and either (1) cater to those, or (2) if you can't/won't, stop DMing for them. But what you shouldn't do is try to get them to have fun your way. "You're having fun wrong," is not something a DM should be thinking or saying to a group of players.
Now if you want to get them to try RP and see if they like it, there is a good way to do that: You speak in character for the NPCs, and you call them by their character, not player, names, as DM. But if they don't like it, stop doing that too. Your job is to have a fun game, not to make people play the game your way.
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WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
Because of the above (a paraphrase from Orwell) I no longer post to the forums -- PM me if you need help or anything.
The DM is allowed to have fun too, Bio. Why everybody thinks the DM needs to make themselves absolutely miserable to please a batch of players who refuse to meet said DM even a step of the path towards halfway is beyond me. DMing is too much gorram work to do if you aren't enjoying the games you're running as much as the players are.
I get the impression that the OP is another player and not the DM.
Correct, I in no way know my stuff enough to DM yet 😅 just a humble player
The easiest thing you can do is have your character speak to the other players’ characters whenever possible. By setting an example, you might be able to encourage the others to follow it. Other than that... not much you can do.
I have the same situation. My college mates are used to the more game-approach structure of "I want to do this..." instead of "Bargok will walk up and..." Either one is a viable option in my book and I'll still continue doing the impressions or mannerisms that the NPCs have if it makes it easier for them to understand the situation. If they want me to tone it down and keep it blunt and to the point, they simply have to ask and I'll swap it over to that. It's no issue.
People will open up from their roleplaying shells when they feel like it. There's nothing more I hated back in school was being forced to act during drama lessons (screw you Mrs Teacher) and the same can be done at the D&D table. Yes it's a roleplaying game but it's not an acting class, players shouldn't be forced to do something if they are not comfortable doing it. You can encourage it by all means but never push them in to it.
Do some positive reinforcement, as a player or DM, for any kind of roleplaying that someone does during the game either after or during the session. There's nothing more refreshing than paying someone a compliment who never usually roleplays and finally doing something in-character via voice or emotion at the table instead of quoting something they saw as an action in an RPG.
One of my college mates, who is a board game player in his own right and LOVES collecting them; he reads the rules, understands them like the back of his hand and can teach me anything in less than a few minutes during our sessions together at the table. We played 6 board games yesterday in a 12-hour span and with my girlfriend at the table. She's awful at learning new stuff and usually moans but with him she was absolutely in her element. I tried getting him in to D&D and he was absolutely stumped by all of it; didn't know what it meant to BE the character and was wondering why we were dictating our actions off what a piece of paper said. I was taken back by it but it didn't mean I was going to remove him from the game for it; I listed off actions for him to take whenever he was in a room while leaving an option or two out in hopes that he would take the initiative to ask. Overall he simply came to terms that roleplaying just wasn't for him and that's fine.
It can be mix-and-match, too. I have been watching an isolation stream where one player always speaks in-character all the time (always a squeaky voice and using the first person for everything), another player speaks in-character for in-character dialog only (monotone voice but describes actions with a normal voice), and another character never speaks in-character (always describes what the character does in 3rd person). The remaining 2 drift between in-character and 3rd party throughout the series.
You might not be able to win them all over if you can win any of them over to RPing. I'm still learning that, no matter how much I think it's betters, I can never control anyone despite how persuasive I think my point of view should be.
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
The DM is allowed to have fun too, Bio. Why everybody thinks the DM needs to make themselves absolutely miserable to please a batch of players who refuse to meet said DM even a step of the path towards halfway is beyond me. DMing is too much gorram work to do if you aren't enjoying the games you're running as much as the players are.
I didn't think bio was saying that it had to be one or the other. It seemed to me that they were saying that there were shades of gray, but at a certain point, the DM just isn't having enough fun being the DM and should stop DMing for that group. Perhaps that was my own belief bias leaning into my understanding of what they said. I will grant that brings a broad interpretation to "catering to your players" but that's where I see the shades of gray. You certainly can encourage new things from your players while feeding them content that they enjoy.
As to the OP, just do things in character and model the behavior that makes it more fun for you. Make sure that your passion for roleplaying comes out, show them that you're having fun, and hopefully that will lead the others into playing that way, too.
Just remember that everyone is different and prioritizes different aspects of the learning curve. Some want to be rock solid on the mechanics before they branch out. Some are more comfortable being more about the character before focusing on the mechanics. Many are somewhere in between or will never embrace one aspect or the other. As long as everyone is having fun, then everything is shiny.
Of course, but the DM shouldn't be trying to strong-arm an entire table of players to play a style of game they dislike, just because the DM likes it. Ideally the DM and players should talk before hand, and if the DM wants heavy RP and the players want to hack and loot, then someone else should be DM or some other accommodation should be reached (e.g. every other adventure is a hack-and-loot, and the intervening ones are RP heavy, so everyone gets some of what they want).
Why everybody thinks the DM needs to make themselves absolutely miserable to please a batch of players who refuse to meet said DM even a step of the path towards halfway is beyond me.
I certainly don't think that, and I'm not aware of anyone I have ever seen make that argument. I have said more than once on this very forum, that making the DM miserable is a recipe for disaster as it will lead to the DM not wanting to keep running the game, and you will be out a DM. But is the DM miserable here? I wasn't clear on that in the OP.
Ideally, both the DM and the players should be having fun. If the DM is not having fun and the players are, then the DM should address this with the players OOC and see what can be done so that everyone has a good time. And if it's not possible to do this, then maybe another person should DM.
DMing is too much gorram work to do if you aren't enjoying the games you're running as much as the players are.
I never said you shouldn't enjoy them, and I completely agree. I made this very argument to one of my players the other day, who was fussing at me over a house rule that doesn't even affect him, and as far as I know isn't affecting anyone else. Basically I have banned the "1 level dip" in a multiclass. You can MC if you want, but not just take 1 level to min-max your PC. Because I don't like min-maxing, when it is OOC like that (as the 1-level dip in my experience nearly always is). He's not planning to MC, and 2 of the other players are not, and the one who is, wants to go 50-50 fighter/rogue. So this shouldn't even be an issue. But he argued that I shouldn't disallow it just because I don't like it. After some discussion I pointed out that, the DM gets to have some rules he likes too. It can't all be self-sacrificing, do-what-the-players-want-even-if-you-hate-it, or else the DM is going to want to stop playing the game. And then where will you be? He had to admit this is true and stopped arguing.
So I am not encouraging the OP to be miserable. I am just encouraging the OP not to try and force something the DM enjoys onto players who do not enjoy it. That way leads to just as much disaster as making the DM miserable does -- the players will just stop playing.
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WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
Because of the above (a paraphrase from Orwell) I no longer post to the forums -- PM me if you need help or anything.
Correct, I in no way know my stuff enough to DM yet 😅 just a humble player
OK then... you can only do what you do (RP) and hope to lead by example. You cannot make other players RP to the level you want, nor should you try. Yes, you have a right to have fun too, before anyone jumps down my throat on that. But if you are not having fun and everyone else is, and they don't want to do more RP, then either leave the group or find a way to have fun without the RP.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
Because of the above (a paraphrase from Orwell) I no longer post to the forums -- PM me if you need help or anything.
I get the impression that the OP is another player and not the DM.
Correct, I in no way know my stuff enough to DM yet 😅 just a humble player
Try interacting with NPC's in character, talk to other characters in character, call them by name and just get into it. If other players join in, cool, if they don't, don't worry about it. Mention to the DM and other players you would like a little more roleplay in the game and see how they feel about it.
Roleplay often makes the world feel more real, but don't try to force it on the players. If they don't naturally start roleplaying after the DM gives them hints, maybe roleplaying is just not their playstyle. Being on the Autism Spectrum makes it difficult, and sometimes painful, to interact with people. I DM and try to roleplay as frequently as possible, but I sometimes just don't have the energy to do so.
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Please check out my homebrew, I would appreciate feedback:
Yea, RP can be fun, but too much can get boring fast
D&D is at it's a heart, a tactical combat game.
If your primary interest is RP, you may be better off joining a theater group.
Now that’s highly debatable, D&D can be many different things to many different people. For TotM players, we almost never use a grid or minis at all even.
I'm relatively new to D&D, I've only been playing for a few months. I play with two different groups of friends. In one group we have really awesome and immersive roleplay, and everyone has a lot of fun playing their characters. In the other group, not so much. Everyone tends to call each other by their real names instead of speaking as their characters, and there isn't much in the way of character interaction. I know everyone plays D&D differently, but roleplaying is half the fun of the game! Any tips on how to encourage other people in the group to let loose and get into it a little more?
Some players are shy like me which is one reason I will not play a Bard, if other players got over the fact that just due to Bards knowing how to play 3 instruments and can use those as a spellcasting focus doesn't mean they want to be up on stage performing. They are a great class in the support role with the spell selection and other class abilities, but everytime someone plays a Bard everyone trys to get them to sing and perform. I say let them play the way they want if they are having a good time they are playing right, if your not having fun leave the group or suck it up they may get more comfortable with RP in time but trying to force it is just wrong.
Some players are shy like me which is one reason I will not play a Bard, if other players got over the fact that just due to Bards knowing how to play 3 instruments and can use those as a spellcasting focus doesn't mean they want to be up on stage performing. They are a great class in the support role with the spell selection and other class abilities, but everytime someone plays a Bard everyone trys to get them to sing and perform. I say let them play the way they want if they are having a good time they are playing right, if your not having fun leave the group or suck it up they may get more comfortable with RP in time but trying to force it is just wrong.
(emphasis mine)
I can completely relate to the emboldened text. For me, shyness isn't something I can get over, it is so crippling to me in social situations that the mere thought of singing and dancing as a bard in front of my fellow D&D players makes me want to gag. I could play a bard, but not do the roleplaying that certain aspects of playing it practically require.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Please check out my homebrew, I would appreciate feedback:
Some players are shy like me which is one reason I will not play a Bard, if other players got over the fact that just due to Bards knowing how to play 3 instruments and can use those as a spellcasting focus doesn't mean they want to be up on stage performing. They are a great class in the support role with the spell selection and other class abilities, but everytime someone plays a Bard everyone trys to get them to sing and perform. I say let them play the way they want if they are having a good time they are playing right, if your not having fun leave the group or suck it up they may get more comfortable with RP in time but trying to force it is just wrong.
(emphasis mine)
I can completely relate to the emboldened text. For me, shyness isn't something I can get over, it is so crippling to me in social situations that the mere thought of singing and dancing as a bard in front of my fellow D&D players makes me want to gag. I could play a bard, but not do the roleplaying that certain aspects of playing it practically require.
I don’t sing or dance either. I can’t sing so my bard “loathes musical theater” so instead I quote “play lines” (movie lines) or sling sitcom style one-liners at people. I elegantly put on my players mask (instrument) and say “I suggest that you....” or when I need to enthrall a crowd I do an epic retailing of a “play” (read movie) that he was in.
Heck, you could even make a Bard themed after Ben Stein if you wanted. I think I’m gonna do that! 😂😂
I'm relatively new to D&D, I've only been playing for a few months. I play with two different groups of friends. In one group we have really awesome and immersive roleplay, and everyone has a lot of fun playing their characters. In the other group, not so much. Everyone tends to call each other by their real names instead of speaking as their characters, and there isn't much in the way of character interaction. I know everyone plays D&D differently, but roleplaying is half the fun of the game! Any tips on how to encourage other people in the group to let loose and get into it a little more?
Nikolai Buckman | vampire | bard
Solace Redgrove | tiefling | bard
I agree, groups that Roleplay are definitely more enjoyable! That said, one of things I learnt quickly when dealing with newer players is sometimes they just aren't comfortable being that vulnerable in a group - and that's perfectly ok. It's easier for me coming from an acting/improv background where you are used to being vulnerable (or in the case of Improv, looking stupid). For others, it can take time to get used to it.
I would definitely check out these videos - start with the one from Matt Mercer, then check out the other from Matt Colville. The second video is on a different subject but I would point you to a specific bit - 2:04 - 3:33 goes into a bit about newer players and roleplay, and additionally covers perhaps one of the most important lessons I've ever learnt as a DM: If the players had fun, you did your job.
Mercer - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srsSEIb-Bw4&t=1s
Colville - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQsJSqn71Fw
#Open D&D
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To you. And to me.
To a lot of people, the fun is to roll dice, kill stuff, get loot, and level up. Not everyone wants to RP, and not everyone wants to, or feels comfortable, speaking in character. As a DM, you need to be aware of your players' preferences and either (1) cater to those, or (2) if you can't/won't, stop DMing for them. But what you shouldn't do is try to get them to have fun your way. "You're having fun wrong," is not something a DM should be thinking or saying to a group of players.
Now if you want to get them to try RP and see if they like it, there is a good way to do that: You speak in character for the NPCs, and you call them by their character, not player, names, as DM. But if they don't like it, stop doing that too. Your job is to have a fun game, not to make people play the game your way.
WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
Because of the above (a paraphrase from Orwell) I no longer post to the forums -- PM me if you need help or anything.
The DM is allowed to have fun too, Bio. Why everybody thinks the DM needs to make themselves absolutely miserable to please a batch of players who refuse to meet said DM even a step of the path towards halfway is beyond me. DMing is too much gorram work to do if you aren't enjoying the games you're running as much as the players are.
Please do not contact or message me.
I get the impression that the OP is another player and not the DM.
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Fair enough. Heh, point stands though, at least in relation to Bio's post.
Please do not contact or message me.
Correct, I in no way know my stuff enough to DM yet 😅 just a humble player
Nikolai Buckman | vampire | bard
Solace Redgrove | tiefling | bard
The easiest thing you can do is have your character speak to the other players’ characters whenever possible. By setting an example, you might be able to encourage the others to follow it. Other than that... not much you can do.
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I have the same situation. My college mates are used to the more game-approach structure of "I want to do this..." instead of "Bargok will walk up and..." Either one is a viable option in my book and I'll still continue doing the impressions or mannerisms that the NPCs have if it makes it easier for them to understand the situation. If they want me to tone it down and keep it blunt and to the point, they simply have to ask and I'll swap it over to that. It's no issue.
People will open up from their roleplaying shells when they feel like it. There's nothing more I hated back in school was being forced to act during drama lessons (screw you Mrs Teacher) and the same can be done at the D&D table. Yes it's a roleplaying game but it's not an acting class, players shouldn't be forced to do something if they are not comfortable doing it. You can encourage it by all means but never push them in to it.
Do some positive reinforcement, as a player or DM, for any kind of roleplaying that someone does during the game either after or during the session. There's nothing more refreshing than paying someone a compliment who never usually roleplays and finally doing something in-character via voice or emotion at the table instead of quoting something they saw as an action in an RPG.
One of my college mates, who is a board game player in his own right and LOVES collecting them; he reads the rules, understands them like the back of his hand and can teach me anything in less than a few minutes during our sessions together at the table. We played 6 board games yesterday in a 12-hour span and with my girlfriend at the table. She's awful at learning new stuff and usually moans but with him she was absolutely in her element. I tried getting him in to D&D and he was absolutely stumped by all of it; didn't know what it meant to BE the character and was wondering why we were dictating our actions off what a piece of paper said. I was taken back by it but it didn't mean I was going to remove him from the game for it; I listed off actions for him to take whenever he was in a room while leaving an option or two out in hopes that he would take the initiative to ask. Overall he simply came to terms that roleplaying just wasn't for him and that's fine.
It can be mix-and-match, too. I have been watching an isolation stream where one player always speaks in-character all the time (always a squeaky voice and using the first person for everything), another player speaks in-character for in-character dialog only (monotone voice but describes actions with a normal voice), and another character never speaks in-character (always describes what the character does in 3rd person). The remaining 2 drift between in-character and 3rd party throughout the series.
You might not be able to win them all over if you can win any of them over to RPing. I'm still learning that, no matter how much I think it's better
s, I can never control anyone despite how persuasive I think my point of view should be.Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
I didn't think bio was saying that it had to be one or the other. It seemed to me that they were saying that there were shades of gray, but at a certain point, the DM just isn't having enough fun being the DM and should stop DMing for that group. Perhaps that was my own belief bias leaning into my understanding of what they said. I will grant that brings a broad interpretation to "catering to your players" but that's where I see the shades of gray. You certainly can encourage new things from your players while feeding them content that they enjoy.
As to the OP, just do things in character and model the behavior that makes it more fun for you. Make sure that your passion for roleplaying comes out, show them that you're having fun, and hopefully that will lead the others into playing that way, too.
Just remember that everyone is different and prioritizes different aspects of the learning curve. Some want to be rock solid on the mechanics before they branch out. Some are more comfortable being more about the character before focusing on the mechanics. Many are somewhere in between or will never embrace one aspect or the other. As long as everyone is having fun, then everything is shiny.
Of course, but the DM shouldn't be trying to strong-arm an entire table of players to play a style of game they dislike, just because the DM likes it. Ideally the DM and players should talk before hand, and if the DM wants heavy RP and the players want to hack and loot, then someone else should be DM or some other accommodation should be reached (e.g. every other adventure is a hack-and-loot, and the intervening ones are RP heavy, so everyone gets some of what they want).
I certainly don't think that, and I'm not aware of anyone I have ever seen make that argument. I have said more than once on this very forum, that making the DM miserable is a recipe for disaster as it will lead to the DM not wanting to keep running the game, and you will be out a DM. But is the DM miserable here? I wasn't clear on that in the OP.
Ideally, both the DM and the players should be having fun. If the DM is not having fun and the players are, then the DM should address this with the players OOC and see what can be done so that everyone has a good time. And if it's not possible to do this, then maybe another person should DM.
I never said you shouldn't enjoy them, and I completely agree. I made this very argument to one of my players the other day, who was fussing at me over a house rule that doesn't even affect him, and as far as I know isn't affecting anyone else. Basically I have banned the "1 level dip" in a multiclass. You can MC if you want, but not just take 1 level to min-max your PC. Because I don't like min-maxing, when it is OOC like that (as the 1-level dip in my experience nearly always is). He's not planning to MC, and 2 of the other players are not, and the one who is, wants to go 50-50 fighter/rogue. So this shouldn't even be an issue. But he argued that I shouldn't disallow it just because I don't like it. After some discussion I pointed out that, the DM gets to have some rules he likes too. It can't all be self-sacrificing, do-what-the-players-want-even-if-you-hate-it, or else the DM is going to want to stop playing the game. And then where will you be? He had to admit this is true and stopped arguing.
So I am not encouraging the OP to be miserable. I am just encouraging the OP not to try and force something the DM enjoys onto players who do not enjoy it. That way leads to just as much disaster as making the DM miserable does -- the players will just stop playing.
WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
Because of the above (a paraphrase from Orwell) I no longer post to the forums -- PM me if you need help or anything.
OK then... you can only do what you do (RP) and hope to lead by example. You cannot make other players RP to the level you want, nor should you try. Yes, you have a right to have fun too, before anyone jumps down my throat on that. But if you are not having fun and everyone else is, and they don't want to do more RP, then either leave the group or find a way to have fun without the RP.
WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
Because of the above (a paraphrase from Orwell) I no longer post to the forums -- PM me if you need help or anything.
Try interacting with NPC's in character, talk to other characters in character, call them by name and just get into it. If other players join in, cool, if they don't, don't worry about it. Mention to the DM and other players you would like a little more roleplay in the game and see how they feel about it.
Roleplay often makes the world feel more real, but don't try to force it on the players. If they don't naturally start roleplaying after the DM gives them hints, maybe roleplaying is just not their playstyle. Being on the Autism Spectrum makes it difficult, and sometimes painful, to interact with people. I DM and try to roleplay as frequently as possible, but I sometimes just don't have the energy to do so.
Please check out my homebrew, I would appreciate feedback:
Spells, Monsters, Subclasses, Races, Arcknight Class, Occultist Class, World, Enigmatic Esoterica forms
Yea, RP can be fun, but too much can get boring fast
D&D is at it's a heart, a tactical combat game.
If your primary interest is RP, you may be better off joining a theater group.
Now that’s highly debatable, D&D can be many different things to many different people. For TotM players, we almost never use a grid or minis at all even.
Creating Epic Boons on DDB
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Some players are shy like me which is one reason I will not play a Bard, if other players got over the fact that just due to Bards knowing how to play 3 instruments and can use those as a spellcasting focus doesn't mean they want to be up on stage performing. They are a great class in the support role with the spell selection and other class abilities, but everytime someone plays a Bard everyone trys to get them to sing and perform. I say let them play the way they want if they are having a good time they are playing right, if your not having fun leave the group or suck it up they may get more comfortable with RP in time but trying to force it is just wrong.
(emphasis mine)
I can completely relate to the emboldened text. For me, shyness isn't something I can get over, it is so crippling to me in social situations that the mere thought of singing and dancing as a bard in front of my fellow D&D players makes me want to gag. I could play a bard, but not do the roleplaying that certain aspects of playing it practically require.
Please check out my homebrew, I would appreciate feedback:
Spells, Monsters, Subclasses, Races, Arcknight Class, Occultist Class, World, Enigmatic Esoterica forms
I don’t sing or dance either. I can’t sing so my bard “loathes musical theater” so instead I quote “play lines” (movie lines) or sling sitcom style one-liners at people. I elegantly put on my players mask (instrument) and say “I suggest that you....” or when I need to enthrall a crowd I do an epic retailing of a “play” (read movie) that he was in.
Heck, you could even make a Bard themed after Ben Stein if you wanted. I think I’m gonna do that! 😂😂
Creating Epic Boons on DDB
DDB Buyers' Guide
Hardcovers, DDB & You
Content Troubleshooting