So a little while back, as a way to keep myself entertained between games becoming less and less common, I set myself a goal to homebrew a subclass for each base class. I now have one for all thirteen base classes, as well as one for Blood Hunter. I also taught myself the most basic of basics on using GMBinder, as I'd never used Markdown before. They're all first drafts, and I'm looking to start balancing and revising them all for a second draft, so any input is welcome. Links below:
I'll warn you the flavor's a bit thin on some of them. That stuff comes pretty naturally to me, but mechanics don't, so I really wanted to barrel down on the hard parts and focus on function first. More flavor will come with successive drafts. (bear this particularly in mind for the Druid, I've got plans)
Anyway, thanks in advance! All feedback is appreciated.
I like the idea, ver Rocketeer/Icarus. I particularly love the personal hot air balloon the best. The only problem I see with it is that if you drop to 0 HP you immediately plummet 500 ft to the ground, take Xd6 damage, and automatically fail 2 Death saving throws. And that’s if the fall damage itself doesn’t instakill you at earlier levels. Some form of safety system needs to be installed I think.
I think you need to add that ribbon you mentioned to pair with the sniper scope: ”You can long jump double your normal distance without making any checks, and without burning a use of your personal aerial device.”
For evasive maneuvers just actually grant half cover so it doesn’t stack on top of actual half cover. The boost to Dex Saves from that will also be fitting at that level too. The way you have this worded they could be hovering an inch off the ground in a cave and it still works.
I think the turbulent tenacity’s part where you can’t be slowed at all is a bit something. I would probably instead grant advantage to all saves against effects that reduce speed, and a guaranteed minimum 30 ft. flying speed and then add a BA Dash action to it. And that name is something too.
Circle of the Deep.
I had expected this to be all abut the oceans, then I saw it was to do with Aberrations. So then I expected it to be all about protecting the natural world from Aberrations, and then I kept reading.
I have to say that I both simultaneously love this idea but also think it’s maybe a little too in-Druidic for a lot of folks. I’m not a huge fan of Druids, so this is no problemo for me, but for Druid players out there...? They may automatically reject it out of hand.
There’s no levels on anything so I’m a guessing at when they get what, and because I don’t play Druids I have to look these levels up:
2nd— Echoes of the Far Realms,
6th— Pressures of the Trench
10th— Whispers from the Void
14th—Shape of the Wild Depths
Echoes of the Far Realms: This is in there three times and it appears to be the same identical paragraph all three times. (If there are options attached to those we cannot see them.) This feature seems nice, but I haven’t done a full search* of what creatures this would include. I think permanent telepathy might be extra, perhaps 1 minute 1ce/short or long rest. Enough to be useful without it being permanent?
Pressures of the Trench: This seems like something they should get at 2nd, or if it is at 6th then they should get something else too. This really seems like a ribbon ability. Also, you may want to tack on something about the cold too like Goliaths used to get before they got upgraded to full on cold resistance.
Whispers of the Void: This seems fine to me.
Shape of the Wild Depths: Permanent Truesight is busted. That’s gotta go.
*Aberrations CR 0-5 There’s some gnarly stuff in there. 120’ Truesight with a Gnothic, a couple lesser Beholder-kin, some lesser-illithid including one of the new Gnomes and the Intellect Devourer, Red Slaad.... That’s a list alright.
I like the idea, ver Rocketeer/Icarus. I particularly love the personal hot air balloon the best. The only problem I see with it is that if you drop to 0 HP you immediately plummet 500 ft to the ground, take Xd6 damage, and automatically fail 2 Death saving throws. And that’s if the fall damage itself doesn’t instakill you at earlier levels. Some form of safety system needs to be installed I think.
This is a very good point. Earlier ideas before I hacked out what I have now and built it into Beyond had mechanics for being knocked out of the sky even before you're at 0, and it sorta seemed like that was way too easy a way to get instakilled. Maybe an automated parachute feature, or a line about your device having a built in charge of feather fall that activates when you fall, but can't be activated manually.
For evasive maneuvers just actually grant half cover so it doesn’t stack on top of actual half cover. The boost to Dex Saves from that will also be fitting at that level too. The way you have this worded they could be hovering an inch off the ground in a cave and it still works.
I've got the half-cover thing sorted in the GMBinder version. It was just there to, I guess, "establish precedent?" The Aeronaut was my first sub and defending against OP accusations before I'd shown it to anyone, haha. I'm okay with the latter part, given that being an inch off the ground still makes it easier to zip out of the way of stuff.
I think the turbulent tenacity’s part where you can’t be slowed at all is a bit something. I would probably instead grant advantage to all saves against effects that reduce speed, and a guaranteed minimum 30 ft. flying speed and then add a BA Dash action to it. And that name is something too.
Hmmmmm...that's definitely worth a consideration. The turn you use to activate the device grants you a Dash, but granting it all the time could be good.
I have to say that I both simultaneously love this idea but also think it’s maybe a little too in-Druidic for a lot of folks. I’m not a huge fan of Druids, so this is no problemo for me, but for Druid players out there...? They may automatically reject it out of hand.
Yeah, I'm expecting that. I have some lore/flavor stuff that I think will help, but these are very much first drafts focusing on mechanics, so I didn't go very hard on that stuff.
There’s no levels on anything so I’m a guessing at when they get what, and because I don’t play Druids I have to look these levels up:
2nd— Echoes of the Far Realms, Pressures of the Trench
6th— Whispers from the Void (Was this supposed to be Pressures?)
10th— Shape of the Wild Depths (Was this supposed to be Whispers?)
14th— ??? (Was this supposed to be Shape of?)
That stuff is all fixed in the GMBinder thing linked above. Echoes is 2, Pressures 6, Whispers 10, and Shape 14.
Echoes of the Far Realms: This is in there three times and it appears to be the same identical paragraph all three times. (If there are options attached to those we cannot see them.) This feature seems nice, but I haven’t done a full search* of what creatures this would include. I think permanent telepathy might be extra, perhaps 1 minute 1ce/short or long rest. Enough to be useful without it being permanent?
It was originally in there multiple times because I was copy/pasting from the Beyond tools, where I had to repeat it in order to up the CR for aberrations added to Wildshape. It was the only way I could figure out to make it work in the builder. Should be fixed and clearer in the GMBinder doc. I think there's only something like 11 total aberrations added before you reach the capstone at 14, where it does expand considerably. I may have to think about limiting the telepathy. Kalashtar get it at 1st, but it's like 10 or 15 feet. It does, however, not rely on a shared language. And I think the Aberrant Mind restricts it, as well.
Pressures of the Trench: This seems like something they should get at 2nd, or if it is at 6th then they should get something else too. This really seems like a ribbon ability. Also, you may want to tack on something about the cold too like Goliaths used to get before they got upgraded to full on cold resistance.
I was trying to cool off a little, what with the level 2 stuff being a pretty big deal. And some other Druids get very situational move/sense stuff at 6. The cold weather thing's a good idea, though.
Whispers of the Void: This seems fine to me.
Shape of the Wild Depths: Permanent Truesight is busted. That’s gotta go.
That's one I'm going to have to think on. True Seeing is a 6th level slot, which you would have by 14, and it's an hour without concentration. I'm basically just giving that for free. It's just layering seeing through magic on top of darkvision. Doesn't allow you to see through walls or anything. I think the general consensus that it's crazy powerful and no PC should ever have it is a little overblown. And it's thematic, a lot of aberrations have it at considerably lower CR/levels than a PC at 14. Maybe restrict it to a free cast of True Seeing 1/SR to mimic wildshape recharges. I'm not sure.
*Aberrations CR 0-5 There’s some gnarly stuff in there. 120’ Truesight with a Gnothic, a couple lesser Beholder-kin, some lesser-illithid including one of the new Gnomes and the Intellect Devourer, Red Slaad.... That’s a list alright.
Yup, I figured out the calculation to get at least up to otyugh/red slaad territory. I knew things like Mind Flayers and Aboleths would always be out of reach. It's still a lower CR than Moon druids top out at, but I haven't been able to playtest for balance or anything yet. I may have to scale it down to CR 3, or put other restrictions on it. It does get pretty crazy.
Alrighty then. Sorry for the long wait. Here is my next review:
Path of Silence
Feel
Overall I like the idea. It’s certainly novel, which is a + from me. I kinda wanna play one when it’s ready because I think this would be an interesting character. It is miles ahead of your last Barb in terms of feel and flavor. You definitely have something here.
Overall Notes
Language and formatting need a cleanup pass or two. A couple of the feature felt clunky when reading them. Not bad, but clunky if that make sense.
Volatile Presence
I like it. One suggestion I might make is to explicitly give them the ability to use Str for intimidation too. (I know that is technically an option if the DM wishes, but many don’t allow that. But this whole concept is about using what is typically considered offensive in a different way, and Str is a Barbs main offense. Just a thought.
Suppressed Rage
My immediately knee-jerk reaction was “no” because one criticism I have of the barbaric class is that it needs a pinch more oomph. I see fighters, Rogues (and even Monks sometimes), outperform Barbarians on DPR and wish Rage Damage did more. But then I thought about is for another half-second and realized this might actually result in more damage simply because they hit more. But when combined with Reckless Attack it would be overkill. But those are the time this Barbarian would pick and choose when to use regular Rage Damage instead! But then I realized that you took that option away from them.... So what I was thinking is instead of making it all the time, make it a “can” feature. That way the player can apply Rage Damage to Damage when they want to, or the the Attack when they want to. It would emphasize this subclass’s concept as a thinker by giving them the tactical option. But you would have to limit that so they couldn’t swap back and forth in the same Attack action. So maybe something like:
Suppressed Rage
3rd-level Path of Silence feature
Your ability to harness and focus your Rage has led to a greater degree of control and accuracy. When you make your first attack on your turn, you can decide to apply your rage damage to weapon attack rolls using Strength instead of damage rolls until your next turn.
Calculated Catastrophe
I get what you’re going for here, but I had to read it three times to make sure I got it (language). I get it, but I think it could be done better with a couple tweaks. First off, the way it is now they will only ever get to use this feature 5% of the time because it requires a nat20. And if that 5% happens when they don’t want to use it for some reason then it’s wasted. So I would amend the restriction to whenever they roll a 10+ so it’s at least a 50/50, but they still can’t cheese it because they rolled a 2. Make sense? Then I would make raging on that turn a requirement if they aren’t already raging (because this Path is all about focusing that rage), drop the whole “equivalent to” and just let it Crit, and do it’s thing. Also, because of the wording it technically makes their Unarmed Strikes count as magical too since they are “weapon attacks.” So I would borrow from the Paladin and switch it to “attacks with a weapon” or something. So maybe something like:
Calculated Catastrophe
6th-level Path of Silence feature
Yours is a slow burning rage, you have learned to wait and study your opponents so that you may strike at your enemies' most vulnerably points. When you roll initiative, you can treat a d20 roll of 10 or higher as a 1, and you must enter a rage on your first turn of combat if you are not already raging. For the duration of your rage you gain the following benefits:
If the first attack you make that turn hits, it is automatically a critical hit.
Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon, the attack deals an extra 1d6 damage to the target
Attacks you make with a weapon count as magical for the purpose of overcoming resistance and immunity to nonmagical attacks and damage.
Reckless Defense
You know how I usually only mention names if I think their dumb? Dude.... I mean, I get it, but dude....
Also, why not just completely invert Reckless attack? I understand wanting to add the bonus action options, I try to add those too because it sucks not having them, but it’s just an idea.
Cold Distance
I get it, but it’s also a dumb name IMO. And the language needs some polish, you get redundant on yourself. You gotta exclude crossbows here as that would make absolutely no sense. Bows and thrown weapons I can get, heck even a blowgun I can understand from the strength of the diaphragm muscle expelling the air so quickly, but not crossbows. I also thing resistance to psychic and advantage to Wis and Int is too much all together. I understand the “Smart & Angry” resisting psychic damage concept but.... Well look at it this way, they already are proficient with Str & Con saves, they already get Feral Instinct, now you’re giving them A on Wis and Int... So that’s buffs to all of the big three (Dex, Con, Wis), plus Str and Int (which is becoming more common), all that’s left is Cha and the only damage type that does is psychic.... See what I mean?
Alrighty then. Sorry for the long wait. Here is my next review:
Path of Silence
Feel
Overall I like the idea. It’s certainly novel, which is a + from me. I kinda wanna play one when it’s ready because I think this would be an interesting character. It is miles ahead of your last Barb in terms of feel and flavor. You definitely have something here.
This is probably the most important part for me, honestly. If the concept isn't there, there's little point refining mechanics.
Overall Notes
Language and formatting need a cleanup pass or two. A couple of the feature felt clunky when reading them. Not bad, but clunky if that make sense.
Oh trust me, all of these will be getting second drafts with mechanical changes and (hopefully) cleaner language. Were there any specific examples of goofy wording I could focus on?
Volatile Presence
I like it. One suggestion I might make is to explicitly give them the ability to use Str for intimidation too. (I know that is technically an option if the DM wishes, but many don’t allow that. But this whole concept is about using what is typically considered offensive in a different way, and Str is a Barbs main offense. Just a thought.
That's a real good suggestion. I resisted that urge initially, because I know it's an optional rule and I didn't want to proscribe anything, but it may be worth including in the next round.
Suppressed Rage
My immediately knee-jerk reaction was “no” because one criticism I have of the barbaric class is that it needs a pinch more oomph. I see fighters, Rogues (and even Monks sometimes), outperform Barbarians on DPR and wish Rage Damage did more. But then I thought about is for another half-second and realized this might actually result in more damage simply because they hit more. But when combined with Reckless Attack it would be overkill. But those are the time this Barbarian would pick and choose when to use regular Rage Damage instead! But then I realized that you took that option away from them.... So what I was thinking is instead of making it all the time, make it a “can” feature. That way the player can apply Rage Damage to Damage when they want to, or the the Attack when they want to. It would emphasize this subclass’s concept as a thinker by giving them the tactical option. But you would have to limit that so they couldn’t swap back and forth in the same Attack action. So maybe something like:
Suppressed Rage
3rd-level Path of Silence feature
Your ability to harness and focus your Rage has led to a greater degree of control and accuracy. When you make your first attack on your turn, you can decide to apply your rage damage to weapon attack rolls using Strength instead of damage rolls until your next turn.
That's one potential solution, but I'd almost rather make you choose when you enter your rage, whether to focus on accuracy or damage, and stick with that for the duration, rather than picking on each turn. That's something to mull over regardless, and maybe see how it works in playtesting (if I ever get to).
Calculated Catastrophe
I get what you’re going for here, but I had to read it three times to make sure I got it (language). I get it, but I think it could be done better with a couple tweaks. First off, the way it is now they will only ever get to use this feature 5% of the time because it requires a nat20. And if that 5% happens when they don’t want to use it for some reason then it’s wasted. So I would amend the restriction to whenever they roll a 10+ so it’s at least a 50/50, but they still can’t cheese it because they rolled a 2. Make sense? Then I would make raging on that turn a requirement if they aren’t already raging (because this Path is all about focusing that rage), drop the whole “equivalent to” and just let it Crit, and do it’s thing. Also, because of the wording it technically makes their Unarmed Strikes count as magical too since they are “weapon attacks.” So I would borrow from the Paladin and switch it to “attacks with a weapon” or something. So maybe something like:
Calculated Catastrophe
6th-level Path of Silence feature
Yours is a slow burning rage, you have learned to wait and study your opponents so that you may strike at your enemies' most vulnerably points. When you roll initiative, you can treat a d20 roll of 10 or higher as a 1, and you must enter a rage on your first turn of combat if you are not already raging. For the duration of your rage you gain the following benefits:
If the first attack you make that turn hits, it is automatically a critical hit.
Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon, the attack deals an extra 1d6 damage to the target
Attacks you make with a weapon count as magical for the purpose of overcoming resistance and immunity to nonmagical attacks and damage.
Nothing about this feature should require a natural 20. The idea is that you choose to take a 1 on Initiative to get the other benefits. One of which is that your first attack that hits calculates its damage like a crit on a nat20, if that makes sense. The language definitely needs refining there. It looks like your rewrite doesn't actually change much but how the Initiative roll works and cleans up some wording. Also, the weapon qualifying as magical doesn't rely on dropping to 1 on initiative, it's just added to your rage from there on out. That's probably my fault.
Reckless Defense
You know how I usually only mention names if I think their dumb? Dude.... I mean, I get it, but dude....
Also, why not just completely invert Reckless attack? I understand wanting to add the bonus action options, I try to add those too because it sucks not having them, but it’s just an idea.
The thought was that Dodge would basically function like an inversion of Reckless Attacks, giving enemies disad against you, and that you would then have disad on your own attacks. That's essentially a full inversion right there. I just added Disengage because it felt like it "matched," and opened it up a bit. (also I know the name is dumb but I still like it)
Cold Distance
I get it, but it’s also a dumb name IMO. And the language needs some polish, you get redundant on yourself. You gotta exclude crossbows here as that would make absolutely no sense. Bows and thrown weapons I can get, heck even a blowgun I can understand from the strength of the diaphragm muscle expelling the air so quickly, but not crossbows. I also thing resistance to psychic and advantage to Wis and Int is too much all together. I understand the “Smart & Angry” resisting psychic damage concept but.... Well look at it this way, they already are proficient with Str & Con saves, they already get Feral Instinct, now you’re giving them A on Wis and Int... So that’s buffs to all of the big three (Dex, Con, Wis), plus Str and Int (which is becoming more common), all that’s left is Cha and the only damage type that does is psychic.... See what I mean?
Could potentially spin crossbows as relying on strength due to holding them firmly to prevent kick and maintain aim, or the strength needed to draw, but could also just rewrite it as ranged weapons without the "loading" property, which should remove all crossbows and guns (if allowed at your table). Would also remove the blowgun, though. I could maybe see dropping one of those three mental edges (psych res., ad on INT/WIS), but I don't know that I could do more than that. Perhaps keep psychic resistance and INT save advantage, but drop WIS?
§About those “specific examples,” they are already being discussed, see below.
Suppressed Rage. If you think it works better for the whole rage as opposed to round by round I can understand that. (WotC starts with them extra and nerfs them after playtest because it’s easier to subtract than add, but if you start your way with it affecting the entire Rage and you decide to add at least you have a suggestion.) §Compare your wording to mine and you should see the differences. That’s 1 example.
Calculated Catastrophe. You’re right, I misread that. But still, IMO it’s better to limit it to high rolls for two reasons:
If they roll low then that means they were slow action this combat and then they wouldn’t have time to “calculate” because they were caught napping.
If they roll low it’s a no brained to take the 1, so there’s no trade off for balance. But if they rolled a 10+ it’s more of a decision that has to be made by the player. After all, this Barbarian plays Catcher.*
The attack counts as magic thing, they likely don’t need this bit at all. Most campaigns see magic weapons by 6th level, or they will soon, the only reason Monks need this is because of Martial Arts and them likely not using weapons. And they get it at 6th-level to keep up with the Barbarian who probably already has a magic weapon, even if it carries no bonuses like a moon-touched sword, or weapon of warning. Plus monks have that mystical connotation which gives it a negative reason, whereas this does not. So if you want to include it, I felt it worked better attached to Rage as that at least gives it a reason.
*(The “thinker’s” position in baseball, since they watch the runners, signal the pitcher, and are often integral to double plays.)
§Examples:
“If the first attack you make that turn hits, it is automatically a critical hit.” V “When you do this, the first weapon attack you make on your first turn deals damage equivalent to that of a critical hit.”
“Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon, the attack deals an extra 1d6 damage to the target.” V “you deal additional damage equal to 1d6 of the weapon's type on every attack that hits....”
I made my wording even more succinct the second time. (Also, for something like the Great Weapon Fighting Style, it technically makes a difference if “the weapon,” or “the attack” does that extra damage compared to if “you” do.)
Reckless Defense. I totally agree with the feature, the way you wrote it is perfect. But the name makes me think of two things:
”This will work exactly the opposite of Reckless Attack... wait, it doesn’t?”
The fight scene at the end of The Court Jester against Ravenhurst whenever “Giacomo” would get “snapped” out of Griselda’s spell and Hawkins was left flailing around. (And I know you know what I’m talking about.)
If you got any runners up for the name, I’d strongly consider them. And if don’t, think of one. (You asked.)
Cold Distance. Yeah, go with the restriction against weapons with the Loading property, Blowguns was a stretch for me anyway. But make sure it specifies that the restriction remains even if that property is otherwise ignored (because of Crossbow Expert & Repeating Shot Infusion) and add a restriction against the Reload property too because half the firearms have that instead of Loading including the Exandrian ones. Or, just specify Crossbows and Firearms and be done with it.
I would say make it either Resist Psychic or Adv on Wis saves. (Int saves are still fairly rare and the ones that do damage do psychic damage anyway.) The Psychic damage resistance is probably more thematic, but less powerful, the Advantage on Wis saves is the strong one.
§About those “specific examples,” they are already being discussed, see below.
Suppressed Rage. If you think it works better for the whole rage as opposed to round by round I can understand that. (WotC starts with them extra and nerfs them after playtest because it’s easier to subtract than add, but if you start your way with it affecting the entire Rage and you decide to add at least you have a suggestion.) §Compare your wording to mine and you should see the differences. That’s 1 example.
I suppose that makes sense. Worst-case scenario, I eventually dial it down from per-turn to per-Rage later after more consideration and (hopefully) playtesting.
Calculated Catastrophe. You’re right, I misread that. But still, IMO it’s better to limit it to high rolls for two reasons:
If they roll low then that means they were slow action this combat and then they wouldn’t have time to “calculate” because they were caught napping.
If they roll low it’s a no brained to take the 1, so there’s no trade off for balance. But if they rolled a 10+ it’s more of a decision that has to be made by the player. After all, this Barbarian plays Catcher.*
The attack counts as magic thing, they likely don’t need this bit at all. Most campaigns see magic weapons by 6th level, or they will soon, the only reason Monks need this is because of Martial Arts and them likely not using weapons. And they get it at 6th-level to keep up with the Barbarian who probably already has a magic weapon, even if it carries no bonuses like a moon-touched sword, or weapon of warning. Plus monks have that mystical connotation which gives it a negative reason, whereas this does not. So if you want to include it, I felt it worked better attached to Rage as that at least gives it a reason.
*(The “thinker’s” position in baseball, since they watch the runners, signal the pitcher, and are often integral to double plays.)
I suppose that makes sense, as well. My initial thinking was that you'd choose to take a 1 instead of rolling at all, but I definitely didn't word it that way in the first draft. And the magical attacks definitely only apply during rage, they just don't require the deferred initiative, which your rewrite seemed to imply. And while magical weapons are common by that level, they aren't guaranteed, and this would also apply to things like javelins and handaxes and arrows (more disposable weapons/ammunition), particularly later when you can ranged Rage using STR instead of DEX. I was thinking it had the potential to be somewhat useful at 6, then synergize really solidly with the capstone later.
*hahaa, I was a catcher
§Examples:
“If the first attack you make that turn hits, it is automatically a critical hit.” V “When you do this, the first weapon attack you make on your first turn deals damage equivalent to that of a critical hit.”
“Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon, the attack deals an extra 1d6 damage to the target.” V “you deal additional damage equal to 1d6 of the weapon's type on every attack that hits....”
I made my wording even more succinct the second time. (Also, for something like the Great Weapon Fighting Style, it technically makes a difference if “the weapon,” or “the attack” does that extra damage compared to if “you” do.)
Some of those are crazy minor. I didn't realize GWF was so specific. I'm not generally big on two-handed weapons. I'll need to reread it. Though I said "equivalent to a critical hit" because I wanted to allow for potentially actually rolling a natural 20 and doubling the doubled damage. It'd be a fringe case, but I wanted to allow for it.
Reckless Defense. I totally agree with the feature, the way you wrote it is perfect. But the name makes me think of two things:
”This will work exactly the opposite of Reckless Attack... wait, it doesn’t?”
The fight scene at the end of The Court Jester against Ravenhurst whenever “Giacomo” would get “snapped” out of Griselda’s spell and Hawkins was left flailing around. (And I know you know what I’m talking about.)
2. Hahahahaha I would expect it to look somewhat more intentional than that.
If you got any runners up for the name, I’d strongly consider them. And if don’t, think of one. (You asked.)
I was looking for an antonym to "reckless," but sadly, "reckful" is not a word. I don't know..."Tactical Retreat?"
Cold Distance. Yeah, go with the restriction against weapons with the Loading property, Blowguns was a stretch for me anyway. But make sure it specifies that the restriction remains even if that property is otherwise ignored (because of Crossbow Expert & Repeating Shot Infusion) and add a restriction against the Reload property too because half the firearms have that instead of Loading including the Exandrian ones. Or, just specify Crossbows and Firearms and be done with it.
I would say make it either Resist Psychic or Adv on Wis saves. (Int saves are still fairly rare and the ones that do damage do psychic damage anyway.) The Psychic damage resistance is probably more thematic, but less powerful, the Advantage on Wis saves is the strong one.
I feel like doing Psychic resist and ad on INT saves sort of match, though. They're not real common, but Barbs won't commonly have more than a +1 INT modifier and no proficiency, so it gives you a chance to avoid, but even if you don't, you'll take half damage on anything psychic. They pair well, help you to do the same thing, and it's a thing that won't particularly come up that often, so it's not a huge, overpowering deal.
I suppose that makes sense, as well. My initial thinking was that you'd choose to take a 1 instead of rolling at all, but I definitely didn't word it that way in the first draft. And the magical attacks definitely only apply during rage, they just don't require the deferred initiative, which your rewrite seemed to imply. And while magical weapons are common by that level, they aren't guaranteed, and this would also apply to things like javelins and handaxes and arrows (more disposable weapons/ammunition), particularly later when you can ranged Rage using STR instead of DEX. I was thinking it had the potential to be somewhat useful at 6, then synergize really solidly with the capstone later.
*hahaa, I was a catcher
Examples
2-A. Some of those are crazy minor.
2-B. Though I said "equivalent to a critical hit" because I wanted to allow for potentially actually rolling a natural 20 and doubling the doubled damage. It'd be a fringe case, but I wanted to allow for it.
3. Reckless Defense.
I was looking for an antonym to "reckless," but sadly, "reckful" is not a word. I don't know..."Tactical Retreat?".
1. Okay then, rearrange it a bit like this:
Calculated Catastrophe
6th-level Path of Silence feature
Yours is a slow burning rage, you have learned to wait and study your opponents so that you may strike at your enemies' most vulnerably points. When you roll initiative you can treat a d20 roll of 10 or higher as a 1, and you must enter a rage on your first turn of combat if you are not already raging. For the duration of your rage you gain the following benefits:
If the first attack you make that turn hits, it is automatically a critical hit.
Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon, the attack deals an extra 1d6 damage to the target
In addition, while you are raging attacks you make with a weapon count as magical for the purpose of overcoming resistance and immunity to nonmagical attacks and damage.
The bullet points help, that’s why WotC uses them.
2-A.That may be minor, but clunky wording like that has plagued D&D for 50 years. This edition is the cleanest it’s ever been and it still sucks with weapon attacks not needing weapons and such. Keep it clean. The cleaner the wording, the better people like it. (Even if the clunky version is actually better.)
2-B.wouldn’t do that. A double critical would be broken and DMs wouldn’t let their players use your subclass. That and I tripped over that clunky ass wording reading that feature.
I suppose that makes sense, as well. My initial thinking was that you'd choose to take a 1 instead of rolling at all, but I definitely didn't word it that way in the first draft. And the magical attacks definitely only apply during rage, they just don't require the deferred initiative, which your rewrite seemed to imply. And while magical weapons are common by that level, they aren't guaranteed, and this would also apply to things like javelins and handaxes and arrows (more disposable weapons/ammunition), particularly later when you can ranged Rage using STR instead of DEX. I was thinking it had the potential to be somewhat useful at 6, then synergize really solidly with the capstone later.
*hahaa, I was a catcher
Examples
2-A. Some of those are crazy minor.
2-B. Though I said "equivalent to a critical hit" because I wanted to allow for potentially actually rolling a natural 20 and doubling the doubled damage. It'd be a fringe case, but I wanted to allow for it.
3. Reckless Defense.
I was looking for an antonym to "reckless," but sadly, "reckful" is not a word. I don't know..."Tactical Retreat?".
1. Okay then, rearrange it a bit like this:
Calculated Catastrophe
6th-level Path of Silence feature
Yours is a slow burning rage, you have learned to wait and study your opponents so that you may strike at your enemies' most vulnerably points. When you roll initiative you can treat a d20 roll of 10 or higher as a 1, and you must enter a rage on your first turn of combat if you are not already raging. For the duration of your rage you gain the following benefits:
If the first attack you make that turn hits, it is automatically a critical hit.
Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon, the attack deals an extra 1d6 damage to the target
In addition, while you are raging attacks you make with a weapon count as magical for the purpose of overcoming resistance and immunity to nonmagical attacks and damage.
The bullet points help, that’s why WotC uses them.
2-A.That may be minor, but clunky wording like that has plagued D&D for 50 years. This edition is the cleanest it’s ever been and it still sucks with weapon attacks not needing weapons and such. Keep it clean. The cleaner the wording, the better people like it. (Even if the clunky version is actually better.)
Awesome, I'll try to reincorporate a lot of that in the second draft.
2-B.wouldn’t do that. A double critical would be broken and DMs wouldn’t let their players use your subclass. That and I tripped over that clunky ass wording reading that feature.
I suppose that makes sense. Though it feels like some other official stuff would be table-banned for similar reasons.
Oh, there's definitely antonyms I know, but none that really did what I wanted them to. I'll probably go with "Tactical Retreat" or "Tactical Withdrawal," something like that.
Re: Path of Silence, I like how you basically made "every character Charles Bronson has ever played" into a subclass. I'd almost suggest going Monk, but Charles Bronson did not play Remo Williams: the Destroyer, plus that move would totally destroy the idea of quiet rage you're playing with which is what makes the subclass fun.
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Jander Sunstar is the thinking person's Drizzt, fight me.
Also: Now I'm thinking about it, I kinda feel like this Barb should get ad on Stealth at some point.
Heh, I actually thought the connection I was making was intentional on your end. Now I want a Jason Statham Barbarian whose features can be summed up in his self-parody speech in Spy.
Also: Now I'm thinking about it, I kinda feel like this Barb should get ad on Stealth at some point.
Heh, I actually thought the connection I was making was intentional on your end. Now I want a Jason Statham Barbarian whose features can be summed up in his self-parody speech in Spy.
No, I wish. I'd just been watching some true crime junk and was thinking about the people who were so angry they could wait and plan to do something really really big. Bronson is a much better pull.
Mimeoturgy: Move the spell scroll creation to a higher level. Being able to hand a party member a 3rd level spell scroll could be a bit OP.
World Tree Warlock: Very situational for a planar campaign but looks cool for that case. I would alter the lvl 10 trait, it seems too powerful on a plane trekking campaign, and absolutely useless elsewhere.
Fauna Heart: For level 1, just add speak with animals to the spell list. The whole "animals can give you info or a favor" thing strikes me as something any character could do through roleplay already. I might also take away the wild magic-ish random nature of the bestial metamorphosis. Maybe just let the sorcerer spend SPs once per long rest to get some bestial features based on a certain kind of beast for the next 24hrs.
Harlequin: Improve the proficiency in deception to expertise, the Scout already gets expertise in two skills so this isn't too much. The Soul Coin aspect of the Devil's bargain seems like one too many things to track on a single ability, maybe just drop it. I think you also need to choose between the spellcasting or the devil's bargain at level 3. Spellcasting alone is the reason the Arcane Trickster is so good, so giving it to the rogue ON TOP of other things is waaaay OP.
Nomad: This one seems really cool, I really like the idea of the ranger using the terrain to get bonuses. Nice.
Oath of Balance: The Aura will not work. No party member is going to want to play with a person that takes away their advantage.
Enduring Mountain: Change the zero movement to half movement, being completely unable to move nullifies most of the benefits of the trance since enemies can just go around. Balance it out by removing the magic resist and limit the reaction attacks to two (having them be unlimited would be impossible to balance when combo'ed with Sentinel).
Mimeoturgy: Move the spell scroll creation to a higher level. Being able to hand a party member a 3rd level spell scroll could be a bit OP.
World Tree Warlock: Very situational for a planar campaign but looks cool for that case. I would alter the lvl 10 trait, it seems too powerful on a plane trekking campaign, and absolutely useless elsewhere.
Fauna Heart: For level 1, just add speak with animals to the spell list. The whole "animals can give you info or a favor" thing strikes me as something any character could do through roleplay already. I might also take away the wild magic-ish random nature of the bestial metamorphosis. Maybe just let the sorcerer spend SPs once per long rest to get some bestial features based on a certain kind of beast for the next 24hrs.
Harlequin: Improve the proficiency in deception to expertise, the Scout already gets expertise in two skills so this isn't too much. The Soul Coin aspect of the Devil's bargain seems like one too many things to track on a single ability, maybe just drop it. I think you also need to choose between the spellcasting or the devil's bargain at level 3. Spellcasting alone is the reason the Arcane Trickster is so good, so giving it to the rogue ON TOP of other things is waaaay OP.
Nomad: This one seems really cool, I really like the idea of the ranger using the terrain to get bonuses. Nice.
Oath of Balance: The Aura will not work. No party member is going to want to play with a person that takes away their advantage.
Enduring Mountain: Change the zero movement to half movement, being completely unable to move nullifies most of the benefits of the trance since enemies can just go around. Balance it out by removing the magic resist and limit the reaction attacks to two (having them be unlimited would be impossible to balance when combo'ed with Sentinel).
Harlequin: I think you're missing that it's only these select spells which largely wouldn't be an AT's interest anyhow. It's also charisma based and, other than Flame Shield, things dependent on a decent Charisma spell DC, whereas an AT can be perfectly functional with or without investing into Int. The Soul Coin thing seems integral to the theme to me, and not even complicated.
Oath of Balance: I see your point on not being able to get advantage and aura of protection at the same time, but it can be hugely clutch for getting aura of protection and ignoring disadvantage + negating enemy advantage all at once. Like, a ranged character can go prone next to the paladin, hit at max range with no penalty, be hit with disadvantage from ranged, and suffer no advantage to be hit by melee or disadvantage to ranged attack on adjacent if enemies get close. There is also the event of heavy control spells over the party; say a Sunburst goes off and the Paladin isn't close enough to an ally. They can get within 10' of them, give them Aura of Protection for their next save reattempt, and also shield them from being hit with advantage from melee until they are good. Not all classes even use advantage on the regular, but if they wanted to, they just have to spread out from the Paladin and possibly get distance or cover, all reasonable precautions in their own ways. If used defensively, it's stronger than a lot of other subclass auras, really, just not as obviously abusable since it inherently caps at straight rolls across the board. They would just create a group dynamic the frontline as a straight rolls only zone, whereas standing apart is the making use of advantage zone. It's kinda cool.
Enduring Mountain: you're right about things going around, but the first one or two might not know any better. To me, this feature reads as intended to use after the monk actively runs into a group of enemies, pairing with the Sentinel feet to keep them unable to run away, locking things in place. You can trap them in your 15' bubble as long as you don't miss a melee attack, which would pair exceptionally well with the standard action spell effects of the Investitures at high level. However many enemies you lock in would inevitably start attacking the monk though, challenging their so-so survivability, so they'll have to be using 1 ki for Patient Defense or forgoing their attacks to use a free Dodge action, maybe getting hits on OA if any are still trying to run to recoup lost dpr. Dodging with decent AC is actually a nice life extender, so that would be the play here. I assume the magic resistance is to better lock down casters, and to better have a chance of keeping that concentration against spells that would instantly end it, so it's kinda necessary.
Mimeoturgy: Move the spell scroll creation to a higher level. Being able to hand a party member a 3rd level spell scroll could be a bit OP.
I've done a lot to revise the Mimeography feature, which should be reflected in the link above. It's now one scroll per LR, which dissolved into dust at the next LR. And handing another party member a spell scroll like that isn't actually all that common. Spell scroll rules dictate that in order to cast a spell from a scroll, it has to be on your class' spell list and be of a level you can cast. If it's not on your class' list, it's unintelligible and you can't use it at all. If it's above your level, you have to pass a not-insubstantial check with your spellcasting ability of 10+the spell's level. If you fail, the scroll is destroyed without being cast. There's also a variant rule that has it backfire horribly. Even a Mimeoturgy Wizard can't just hand a Barbarian a Disintegrate scroll and expect them to use it.
World Tree Warlock: Very situational for a planar campaign but looks cool for that case. I would alter the lvl 10 trait, it seems too powerful on a plane trekking campaign, and absolutely useless elsewhere.
Interesting. The level 10 feature is the one I've received the least comment on and the one I thought had the least problems. It's also the one I had no intention to revise. I wouldn't think advantage on saves against effects like Psychic Wind would be all that game-breaking, considering that if you are in a planar campaign, you're going to be subjected to those effects a lot. Multiple times a session. If it were immunity, I'd agree with you. I also would quibble that immunity to extreme heat, extreme cold, and high altitude even on the material plane is not "absolutely useless." Those are environments that can inflict damage and rapid levels of exhaustion.
Fauna Heart: For level 1, just add speak with animals to the spell list. The whole "animals can give you info or a favor" thing strikes me as something any character could do through roleplay already. I might also take away the wild magic-ish random nature of the bestial metamorphosis. Maybe just let the sorcerer spend SPs once per long rest to get some bestial features based on a certain kind of beast for the next 24hrs.
What you are describing is not dissimilar to the sub's capstone feature, which grants you permanent benefits from one bestial aspect of your choice, as well as the option to expend sorcery points to pick and choose aspects at will rather than going with the random effect. I can see how some wouldn't be fond of the randomness, but I love Wild Magic, and the unexpected nature of how it works makes for some great roleplay. It's the central mechanic of the sub, and I don't intend to ditch it without a really compelling reason and replacement.
Harlequin: Improve the proficiency in deception to expertise, the Scout already gets expertise in two skills so this isn't too much. The Soul Coin aspect of the Devil's bargain seems like one too many things to track on a single ability, maybe just drop it. I think you also need to choose between the spellcasting or the devil's bargain at level 3. Spellcasting alone is the reason the Arcane Trickster is so good, so giving it to the rogue ON TOP of other things is waaaay OP.
I originally did give them expertise in deception, but dialed it back, due to that basically making Devil's Bargain (modeled somewhat on the Inquisitive's Insightful Fighting) basically a gimme check. Granted, a player can take expertise in Deception as a Rogue anyway, but they'd have to give something else up to take it and get that extra edge on Devil's Bargain, which I thought was a better trade-off. And Soul Coins have their own rules (see here) regarding how many you can carry, what they can do, and how they are destroyed. I assume if that's not too much to track, then this alternate way of gaining and using them wouldn't be, either. And re: Spellcasting, the Harlequin doesn't get it. They don't have the full Wizard's spell list like an Arcane Trickster does. They can produce between 2 and 6 patches of cloth a day (depending on level/prof) and burn one to cast one of the four spells listed. As long as they have one patch remaining, they can also use the produce flame cantrip. That's a far, far cry from third-caster slots and a full spell list.
Nomad: This one seems really cool, I really like the idea of the ranger using the terrain to get bonuses. Nice.
There's one or two things I want to change on it (the 30% discount at shops is dumb and videogamey and doesn't feel right for D&D and will probably become advantage on persuasion checks to haggle at shops) but overall yeah, I'm exceptionally proud of this one.
Oath of Balance: The Aura will not work. No party member is going to want to play with a person that takes away their advantage.
I think JZADragon below addresses this far better than I could, but the real benefit here is that no one in the aura can suffer disadvantage. The Paladin or an ally wouldn't have disad on long range with ranged/thrown weapons. Allies in the aura who become blinded could attack without penalty. Being restrained let them be attacked at advantage. If an ally wants advantage, all they have to do is be more than ten feet from the Paladin. But this sub would be an equalizer, like some of Clockwork Soul's features, ensuring everyone rolls straight all the time. There's some downsides, but I'd say the upsides far outweigh them.
Enduring Mountain: Change the zero movement to half movement, being completely unable to move nullifies most of the benefits of the trance since enemies can just go around. Balance it out by removing the magic resist and limit the reaction attacks to two (having them be unlimited would be impossible to balance when combo'ed with Sentinel).
Enemies can't go around if the Monk is in the center of a 30-foot wide hallway. It's the same principle as a UA Fighting Style from a ways back. I think it was called Tunnel Fighter? This is a Monk who can either run into a group of enemies, sit still and wreck shop (while still pulling aggro and taking a lot of hits) or sit at a choke point like a doorway or tunnel to slow a large attack. The zero movement is how it balances, as even with Sentinel (not a given, something only optimizers would pull) the Monk is going to miss, and some enemies will get through undamaged and unaffected. If the Monk could move in this state, you're right, it would be absolutely unbalanceable.
This Monk's main job is to sit still and get in the way. Which, to some degree, is a bit of an inversion of how Monks normally work, but that's a big part of what I find appealing about homebrewing subs. How do I change a thing and still keep it that thing? What else can I make it do? That's...basically the point of homebrewing, as I see it.
Good points all around. Maybe on the Oath of Balance Aura just have it not affect the paladin themselves? Or maybe they can toggle it on/off each day? I think my main concern was it makes it impossible for the paladin themselves to ever have advantage (unless I misunderstood something). Maybe you've got a paladin player who is down with that (which is all that matters ultimately) but in my experience DM'ing for paladins they really like their advantage bc it increases the chance for crit smites.
Overall, really cool classes all around.
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So a little while back, as a way to keep myself entertained between games becoming less and less common, I set myself a goal to homebrew a subclass for each base class. I now have one for all thirteen base classes, as well as one for Blood Hunter. I also taught myself the most basic of basics on using GMBinder, as I'd never used Markdown before. They're all first drafts, and I'm looking to start balancing and revising them all for a second draft, so any input is welcome. Links below:
Aeronaut specialist for Artificer
Path of Silence for Barbarian
College of the Ensemble for Bard
Order of Thirst for Blood Hunter
Hunger Domain for Cleric
Circle of the Deep for Druid
Dancer archetype for Fighter
Way of the Enduring Mountain for Monk
Oath of Balance for Paladin
Nomad archetype for Ranger
Harlequin archetype for Rogue
The Fauna Heart origin for Sorcerer
The World Tree patron for Warlock
Mimeoturgy arcane tradition for Wizard
I'll warn you the flavor's a bit thin on some of them. That stuff comes pretty naturally to me, but mechanics don't, so I really wanted to barrel down on the hard parts and focus on function first. More flavor will come with successive drafts. (bear this particularly in mind for the Druid, I've got plans)
Anyway, thanks in advance! All feedback is appreciated.
Okay:
The Aeronaut
I like the idea, ver Rocketeer/Icarus. I particularly love the personal hot air balloon the best. The only problem I see with it is that if you drop to 0 HP you immediately plummet 500 ft to the ground, take Xd6 damage, and automatically fail 2 Death saving throws. And that’s if the fall damage itself doesn’t instakill you at earlier levels. Some form of safety system needs to be installed I think.
I think you need to add that ribbon you mentioned to pair with the sniper scope:
”You can long jump double your normal distance without making any checks, and without burning a use of your personal aerial device.”
For evasive maneuvers just actually grant half cover so it doesn’t stack on top of actual half cover. The boost to Dex Saves from that will also be fitting at that level too. The way you have this worded they could be hovering an inch off the ground in a cave and it still works.
I think the turbulent tenacity’s part where you can’t be slowed at all is a bit something. I would probably instead grant advantage to all saves against effects that reduce speed, and a guaranteed minimum 30 ft. flying speed and then add a BA Dash action to it. And that name is something too.
Circle of the Deep.
I had expected this to be all abut the oceans, then I saw it was to do with Aberrations. So then I expected it to be all about protecting the natural world from Aberrations, and then I kept reading.
I have to say that I both simultaneously love this idea but also think it’s maybe a little too in-Druidic for a lot of folks. I’m not a huge fan of Druids, so this is no problemo for me, but for Druid players out there...? They may automatically reject it out of hand.
There’s no levels on anything so I’m a guessing at when they get what, and because I don’t play Druids I have to look these levels up:
Echoes of the Far Realms: This is in there three times and it appears to be the same identical paragraph all three times. (If there are options attached to those we cannot see them.) This feature seems nice, but I haven’t done a full search* of what creatures this would include. I think permanent telepathy might be extra, perhaps 1 minute 1ce/short or long rest. Enough to be useful without it being permanent?
Pressures of the Trench: This seems like something they should get at 2nd, or if it is at 6th then they should get something else too. This really seems like a ribbon ability. Also, you may want to tack on something about the cold too like Goliaths used to get before they got upgraded to full on cold resistance.
Whispers of the Void: This seems fine to me.
Shape of the Wild Depths: Permanent Truesight is busted. That’s gotta go.
*Aberrations CR 0-5
There’s some gnarly stuff in there. 120’ Truesight with a Gnothic, a couple lesser Beholder-kin, some lesser-illithid including one of the new Gnomes and the Intellect Devourer, Red Slaad.... That’s a list alright.
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This is a very good point. Earlier ideas before I hacked out what I have now and built it into Beyond had mechanics for being knocked out of the sky even before you're at 0, and it sorta seemed like that was way too easy a way to get instakilled. Maybe an automated parachute feature, or a line about your device having a built in charge of feather fall that activates when you fall, but can't be activated manually.
I've got the half-cover thing sorted in the GMBinder version. It was just there to, I guess, "establish precedent?" The Aeronaut was my first sub and defending against OP accusations before I'd shown it to anyone, haha. I'm okay with the latter part, given that being an inch off the ground still makes it easier to zip out of the way of stuff.
Hmmmmm...that's definitely worth a consideration. The turn you use to activate the device grants you a Dash, but granting it all the time could be good.
That stuff is all fixed in the GMBinder thing linked above. Echoes is 2, Pressures 6, Whispers 10, and Shape 14.
It was originally in there multiple times because I was copy/pasting from the Beyond tools, where I had to repeat it in order to up the CR for aberrations added to Wildshape. It was the only way I could figure out to make it work in the builder. Should be fixed and clearer in the GMBinder doc. I think there's only something like 11 total aberrations added before you reach the capstone at 14, where it does expand considerably. I may have to think about limiting the telepathy. Kalashtar get it at 1st, but it's like 10 or 15 feet. It does, however, not rely on a shared language. And I think the Aberrant Mind restricts it, as well.
I was trying to cool off a little, what with the level 2 stuff being a pretty big deal. And some other Druids get very situational move/sense stuff at 6. The cold weather thing's a good idea, though.
That's one I'm going to have to think on. True Seeing is a 6th level slot, which you would have by 14, and it's an hour without concentration. I'm basically just giving that for free. It's just layering seeing through magic on top of darkvision. Doesn't allow you to see through walls or anything. I think the general consensus that it's crazy powerful and no PC should ever have it is a little overblown. And it's thematic, a lot of aberrations have it at considerably lower CR/levels than a PC at 14. Maybe restrict it to a free cast of True Seeing 1/SR to mimic wildshape recharges. I'm not sure.
Yup, I figured out the calculation to get at least up to otyugh/red slaad territory. I knew things like Mind Flayers and Aboleths would always be out of reach. It's still a lower CR than Moon druids top out at, but I haven't been able to playtest for balance or anything yet. I may have to scale it down to CR 3, or put other restrictions on it. It does get pretty crazy.
Thanks!
Alrighty then. Sorry for the long wait. Here is my next review:
Path of Silence
Feel
Overall I like the idea. It’s certainly novel, which is a + from me. I kinda wanna play one when it’s ready because I think this would be an interesting character. It is miles ahead of your last Barb in terms of feel and flavor. You definitely have something here.
Overall Notes
Language and formatting need a cleanup pass or two. A couple of the feature felt clunky when reading them. Not bad, but clunky if that make sense.
Volatile Presence
I like it. One suggestion I might make is to explicitly give them the ability to use Str for intimidation too. (I know that is technically an option if the DM wishes, but many don’t allow that. But this whole concept is about using what is typically considered offensive in a different way, and Str is a Barbs main offense. Just a thought.
Suppressed Rage
My immediately knee-jerk reaction was “no” because one criticism I have of the barbaric class is that it needs a pinch more oomph. I see fighters, Rogues (and even Monks sometimes), outperform Barbarians on DPR and wish Rage Damage did more. But then I thought about is for another half-second and realized this might actually result in more damage simply because they hit more. But when combined with Reckless Attack it would be overkill. But those are the time this Barbarian would pick and choose when to use regular Rage Damage instead! But then I realized that you took that option away from them.... So what I was thinking is instead of making it all the time, make it a “can” feature. That way the player can apply Rage Damage to Damage when they want to, or the the Attack when they want to. It would emphasize this subclass’s concept as a thinker by giving them the tactical option. But you would have to limit that so they couldn’t swap back and forth in the same Attack action. So maybe something like:
Suppressed Rage
3rd-level Path of Silence feature
Your ability to harness and focus your Rage has led to a greater degree of control and accuracy. When you make your first attack on your turn, you can decide to apply your rage damage to weapon attack rolls using Strength instead of damage rolls until your next turn.
Calculated Catastrophe
I get what you’re going for here, but I had to read it three times to make sure I got it (language). I get it, but I think it could be done better with a couple tweaks. First off, the way it is now they will only ever get to use this feature 5% of the time because it requires a nat20. And if that 5% happens when they don’t want to use it for some reason then it’s wasted. So I would amend the restriction to whenever they roll a 10+ so it’s at least a 50/50, but they still can’t cheese it because they rolled a 2. Make sense? Then I would make raging on that turn a requirement if they aren’t already raging (because this Path is all about focusing that rage), drop the whole “equivalent to” and just let it Crit, and do it’s thing. Also, because of the wording it technically makes their Unarmed Strikes count as magical too since they are “weapon attacks.” So I would borrow from the Paladin and switch it to “attacks with a weapon” or something. So maybe something like:
Calculated Catastrophe
6th-level Path of Silence feature
Yours is a slow burning rage, you have learned to wait and study your opponents so that you may strike at your enemies' most vulnerably points. When you roll initiative, you can treat a d20 roll of 10 or higher as a 1, and you must enter a rage on your first turn of combat if you are not already raging. For the duration of your rage you gain the following benefits:
Reckless Defense
You know how I usually only mention names if I think their dumb? Dude.... I mean, I get it, but dude....
Also, why not just completely invert Reckless attack? I understand wanting to add the bonus action options, I try to add those too because it sucks not having them, but it’s just an idea.
Cold Distance
I get it, but it’s also a dumb name IMO. And the language needs some polish, you get redundant on yourself.
You gotta exclude crossbows here as that would make absolutely no sense. Bows and thrown weapons I can get, heck even a blowgun I can understand from the strength of the diaphragm muscle expelling the air so quickly, but not crossbows.
I also thing resistance to psychic and advantage to Wis and Int is too much all together. I understand the “Smart & Angry” resisting psychic damage concept but.... Well look at it this way, they already are proficient with Str & Con saves, they already get Feral Instinct, now you’re giving them A on Wis and Int... So that’s buffs to all of the big three (Dex, Con, Wis), plus Str and Int (which is becoming more common), all that’s left is Cha and the only damage type that does is psychic.... See what I mean?
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This is probably the most important part for me, honestly. If the concept isn't there, there's little point refining mechanics.
Oh trust me, all of these will be getting second drafts with mechanical changes and (hopefully) cleaner language. Were there any specific examples of goofy wording I could focus on?
That's a real good suggestion. I resisted that urge initially, because I know it's an optional rule and I didn't want to proscribe anything, but it may be worth including in the next round.
That's one potential solution, but I'd almost rather make you choose when you enter your rage, whether to focus on accuracy or damage, and stick with that for the duration, rather than picking on each turn. That's something to mull over regardless, and maybe see how it works in playtesting (if I ever get to).
Nothing about this feature should require a natural 20. The idea is that you choose to take a 1 on Initiative to get the other benefits. One of which is that your first attack that hits calculates its damage like a crit on a nat20, if that makes sense. The language definitely needs refining there. It looks like your rewrite doesn't actually change much but how the Initiative roll works and cleans up some wording. Also, the weapon qualifying as magical doesn't rely on dropping to 1 on initiative, it's just added to your rage from there on out. That's probably my fault.
The thought was that Dodge would basically function like an inversion of Reckless Attacks, giving enemies disad against you, and that you would then have disad on your own attacks. That's essentially a full inversion right there. I just added Disengage because it felt like it "matched," and opened it up a bit. (also I know the name is dumb but I still like it)
Could potentially spin crossbows as relying on strength due to holding them firmly to prevent kick and maintain aim, or the strength needed to draw, but could also just rewrite it as ranged weapons without the "loading" property, which should remove all crossbows and guns (if allowed at your table). Would also remove the blowgun, though. I could maybe see dropping one of those three mental edges (psych res., ad on INT/WIS), but I don't know that I could do more than that. Perhaps keep psychic resistance and INT save advantage, but drop WIS?
Thanks for checking it out!
Happy to help!
§About those “specific examples,” they are already being discussed, see below.
Suppressed Rage. If you think it works better for the whole rage as opposed to round by round I can understand that. (WotC starts with them extra and nerfs them after playtest because it’s easier to subtract than add, but if you start your way with it affecting the entire Rage and you decide to add at least you have a suggestion.) §Compare your wording to mine and you should see the differences. That’s 1 example.
Calculated Catastrophe. You’re right, I misread that. But still, IMO it’s better to limit it to high rolls for two reasons:
The attack counts as magic thing, they likely don’t need this bit at all. Most campaigns see magic weapons by 6th level, or they will soon, the only reason Monks need this is because of Martial Arts and them likely not using weapons. And they get it at 6th-level to keep up with the Barbarian who probably already has a magic weapon, even if it carries no bonuses like a moon-touched sword, or weapon of warning.
Plus monks have that mystical connotation which gives it a negative reason, whereas this does not. So if you want to include it, I felt it worked better attached to Rage as that at least gives it a reason.
*(The “thinker’s” position in baseball, since they watch the runners, signal the pitcher, and are often integral to double plays.)
§Examples:
to the target.” V “you deal additional damage equal to 1d6 of the weapon's type on every attack that hits....”I made my wording even more succinct the second time. (Also, for something like the Great Weapon Fighting Style, it technically makes a difference if “the weapon,” or “the attack” does that extra damage compared to if “you” do.)
Reckless Defense. I totally agree with the feature, the way you wrote it is perfect. But the name makes me think of two things:
If you got any runners up for the name, I’d strongly consider them. And if don’t, think of one. (You asked.)
Cold Distance. Yeah, go with the restriction against weapons with the Loading property, Blowguns was a stretch for me anyway. But make sure it specifies that the restriction remains even if that property is otherwise ignored (because of Crossbow Expert & Repeating Shot Infusion) and add a restriction against the Reload property too because half the firearms have that instead of Loading including the Exandrian ones. Or, just specify Crossbows and Firearms and be done with it.
I would say make it either Resist Psychic or Adv on Wis saves. (Int saves are still fairly rare and the ones that do damage do psychic damage anyway.) The Psychic damage resistance is probably more thematic, but less powerful, the Advantage on Wis saves is the strong one.
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I suppose that makes sense. Worst-case scenario, I eventually dial it down from per-turn to per-Rage later after more consideration and (hopefully) playtesting.
I suppose that makes sense, as well. My initial thinking was that you'd choose to take a 1 instead of rolling at all, but I definitely didn't word it that way in the first draft. And the magical attacks definitely only apply during rage, they just don't require the deferred initiative, which your rewrite seemed to imply. And while magical weapons are common by that level, they aren't guaranteed, and this would also apply to things like javelins and handaxes and arrows (more disposable weapons/ammunition), particularly later when you can ranged Rage using STR instead of DEX. I was thinking it had the potential to be somewhat useful at 6, then synergize really solidly with the capstone later.
*hahaa, I was a catcher
Some of those are crazy minor. I didn't realize GWF was so specific. I'm not generally big on two-handed weapons. I'll need to reread it. Though I said "equivalent to a critical hit" because I wanted to allow for potentially actually rolling a natural 20 and doubling the doubled damage. It'd be a fringe case, but I wanted to allow for it.
2. Hahahahaha I would expect it to look somewhat more intentional than that.
I was looking for an antonym to "reckless," but sadly, "reckful" is not a word. I don't know..."Tactical Retreat?"
I feel like doing Psychic resist and ad on INT saves sort of match, though. They're not real common, but Barbs won't commonly have more than a +1 INT modifier and no proficiency, so it gives you a chance to avoid, but even if you don't, you'll take half damage on anything psychic. They pair well, help you to do the same thing, and it's a thing that won't particularly come up that often, so it's not a huge, overpowering deal.
1. Okay then, rearrange it a bit like this:
Calculated Catastrophe
6th-level Path of Silence feature
Yours is a slow burning rage, you have learned to wait and study your opponents so that you may strike at your enemies' most vulnerably points. When you roll initiative you can treat a d20 roll of 10 or higher as a 1, and you must enter a rage on your first turn of combat if you are not already raging. For the duration of your rage you gain the following benefits:
In addition, while you are raging attacks you make with a weapon count as magical for the purpose of overcoming resistance and immunity to nonmagical attacks and damage.
The bullet points help, that’s why WotC uses them.
2-A.That may be minor, but clunky wording like that has plagued D&D for 50 years. This edition is the cleanest it’s ever been and it still sucks with weapon attacks not needing weapons and such. Keep it clean. The cleaner the wording, the better people like it. (Even if the clunky version is actually better.)
2-B.wouldn’t do that. A double critical would be broken and DMs wouldn’t let their players use your subclass. That and I tripped over that clunky ass wording reading that feature.
3. Various, Considered, Prudent, Mindful, Restrained, Pensive....
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Awesome, I'll try to reincorporate a lot of that in the second draft.
I suppose that makes sense. Though it feels like some other official stuff would be table-banned for similar reasons.
Oh, there's definitely antonyms I know, but none that really did what I wanted them to. I'll probably go with "Tactical Retreat" or "Tactical Withdrawal," something like that.
Re: Path of Silence, I like how you basically made "every character Charles Bronson has ever played" into a subclass. I'd almost suggest going Monk, but Charles Bronson did not play Remo Williams: the Destroyer, plus that move would totally destroy the idea of quiet rage you're playing with which is what makes the subclass fun.
Jander Sunstar is the thinking person's Drizzt, fight me.
Hahahaha Path of Silence as a Death Wish protag
Also: Now I'm thinking about it, I kinda feel like this Barb should get ad on Stealth at some point.
I am still bitter to this day that Remo Williams, the Legend Continues was never made.
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Name me one other anything with a double critical. I’ll wait.
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Heh, I actually thought the connection I was making was intentional on your end. Now I want a Jason Statham Barbarian whose features can be summed up in his self-parody speech in Spy.
Are the books any good? At the time I didn't realize it but turns out it was based on a series of 80s pulp "men's adventure" novels.
Jander Sunstar is the thinking person's Drizzt, fight me.
🤷♂️ I had no idea until just now. (Doesn’t surprise me though, considering.)
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No, I wish. I'd just been watching some true crime junk and was thinking about the people who were so angry they could wait and plan to do something really really big. Bronson is a much better pull.
Mimeoturgy: Move the spell scroll creation to a higher level. Being able to hand a party member a 3rd level spell scroll could be a bit OP.
World Tree Warlock: Very situational for a planar campaign but looks cool for that case. I would alter the lvl 10 trait, it seems too powerful on a plane trekking campaign, and absolutely useless elsewhere.
Fauna Heart: For level 1, just add speak with animals to the spell list. The whole "animals can give you info or a favor" thing strikes me as something any character could do through roleplay already. I might also take away the wild magic-ish random nature of the bestial metamorphosis. Maybe just let the sorcerer spend SPs once per long rest to get some bestial features based on a certain kind of beast for the next 24hrs.
Harlequin: Improve the proficiency in deception to expertise, the Scout already gets expertise in two skills so this isn't too much. The Soul Coin aspect of the Devil's bargain seems like one too many things to track on a single ability, maybe just drop it. I think you also need to choose between the spellcasting or the devil's bargain at level 3. Spellcasting alone is the reason the Arcane Trickster is so good, so giving it to the rogue ON TOP of other things is waaaay OP.
Nomad: This one seems really cool, I really like the idea of the ranger using the terrain to get bonuses. Nice.
Oath of Balance: The Aura will not work. No party member is going to want to play with a person that takes away their advantage.
Enduring Mountain: Change the zero movement to half movement, being completely unable to move nullifies most of the benefits of the trance since enemies can just go around. Balance it out by removing the magic resist and limit the reaction attacks to two (having them be unlimited would be impossible to balance when combo'ed with Sentinel).
Harlequin: I think you're missing that it's only these select spells which largely wouldn't be an AT's interest anyhow. It's also charisma based and, other than Flame Shield, things dependent on a decent Charisma spell DC, whereas an AT can be perfectly functional with or without investing into Int. The Soul Coin thing seems integral to the theme to me, and not even complicated.
Oath of Balance: I see your point on not being able to get advantage and aura of protection at the same time, but it can be hugely clutch for getting aura of protection and ignoring disadvantage + negating enemy advantage all at once. Like, a ranged character can go prone next to the paladin, hit at max range with no penalty, be hit with disadvantage from ranged, and suffer no advantage to be hit by melee or disadvantage to ranged attack on adjacent if enemies get close. There is also the event of heavy control spells over the party; say a Sunburst goes off and the Paladin isn't close enough to an ally. They can get within 10' of them, give them Aura of Protection for their next save reattempt, and also shield them from being hit with advantage from melee until they are good. Not all classes even use advantage on the regular, but if they wanted to, they just have to spread out from the Paladin and possibly get distance or cover, all reasonable precautions in their own ways. If used defensively, it's stronger than a lot of other subclass auras, really, just not as obviously abusable since it inherently caps at straight rolls across the board. They would just create a group dynamic the frontline as a straight rolls only zone, whereas standing apart is the making use of advantage zone. It's kinda cool.
Enduring Mountain: you're right about things going around, but the first one or two might not know any better. To me, this feature reads as intended to use after the monk actively runs into a group of enemies, pairing with the Sentinel feet to keep them unable to run away, locking things in place. You can trap them in your 15' bubble as long as you don't miss a melee attack, which would pair exceptionally well with the standard action spell effects of the Investitures at high level. However many enemies you lock in would inevitably start attacking the monk though, challenging their so-so survivability, so they'll have to be using 1 ki for Patient Defense or forgoing their attacks to use a free Dodge action, maybe getting hits on OA if any are still trying to run to recoup lost dpr. Dodging with decent AC is actually a nice life extender, so that would be the play here. I assume the magic resistance is to better lock down casters, and to better have a chance of keeping that concentration against spells that would instantly end it, so it's kinda necessary.
I've done a lot to revise the Mimeography feature, which should be reflected in the link above. It's now one scroll per LR, which dissolved into dust at the next LR. And handing another party member a spell scroll like that isn't actually all that common. Spell scroll rules dictate that in order to cast a spell from a scroll, it has to be on your class' spell list and be of a level you can cast. If it's not on your class' list, it's unintelligible and you can't use it at all. If it's above your level, you have to pass a not-insubstantial check with your spellcasting ability of 10+the spell's level. If you fail, the scroll is destroyed without being cast. There's also a variant rule that has it backfire horribly. Even a Mimeoturgy Wizard can't just hand a Barbarian a Disintegrate scroll and expect them to use it.
Interesting. The level 10 feature is the one I've received the least comment on and the one I thought had the least problems. It's also the one I had no intention to revise. I wouldn't think advantage on saves against effects like Psychic Wind would be all that game-breaking, considering that if you are in a planar campaign, you're going to be subjected to those effects a lot. Multiple times a session. If it were immunity, I'd agree with you. I also would quibble that immunity to extreme heat, extreme cold, and high altitude even on the material plane is not "absolutely useless." Those are environments that can inflict damage and rapid levels of exhaustion.
What you are describing is not dissimilar to the sub's capstone feature, which grants you permanent benefits from one bestial aspect of your choice, as well as the option to expend sorcery points to pick and choose aspects at will rather than going with the random effect. I can see how some wouldn't be fond of the randomness, but I love Wild Magic, and the unexpected nature of how it works makes for some great roleplay. It's the central mechanic of the sub, and I don't intend to ditch it without a really compelling reason and replacement.
I originally did give them expertise in deception, but dialed it back, due to that basically making Devil's Bargain (modeled somewhat on the Inquisitive's Insightful Fighting) basically a gimme check. Granted, a player can take expertise in Deception as a Rogue anyway, but they'd have to give something else up to take it and get that extra edge on Devil's Bargain, which I thought was a better trade-off. And Soul Coins have their own rules (see here) regarding how many you can carry, what they can do, and how they are destroyed. I assume if that's not too much to track, then this alternate way of gaining and using them wouldn't be, either. And re: Spellcasting, the Harlequin doesn't get it. They don't have the full Wizard's spell list like an Arcane Trickster does. They can produce between 2 and 6 patches of cloth a day (depending on level/prof) and burn one to cast one of the four spells listed. As long as they have one patch remaining, they can also use the produce flame cantrip. That's a far, far cry from third-caster slots and a full spell list.
There's one or two things I want to change on it (the 30% discount at shops is dumb and videogamey and doesn't feel right for D&D and will probably become advantage on persuasion checks to haggle at shops) but overall yeah, I'm exceptionally proud of this one.
I think JZADragon below addresses this far better than I could, but the real benefit here is that no one in the aura can suffer disadvantage. The Paladin or an ally wouldn't have disad on long range with ranged/thrown weapons. Allies in the aura who become blinded could attack without penalty. Being restrained let them be attacked at advantage. If an ally wants advantage, all they have to do is be more than ten feet from the Paladin. But this sub would be an equalizer, like some of Clockwork Soul's features, ensuring everyone rolls straight all the time. There's some downsides, but I'd say the upsides far outweigh them.
Enemies can't go around if the Monk is in the center of a 30-foot wide hallway. It's the same principle as a UA Fighting Style from a ways back. I think it was called Tunnel Fighter? This is a Monk who can either run into a group of enemies, sit still and wreck shop (while still pulling aggro and taking a lot of hits) or sit at a choke point like a doorway or tunnel to slow a large attack. The zero movement is how it balances, as even with Sentinel (not a given, something only optimizers would pull) the Monk is going to miss, and some enemies will get through undamaged and unaffected. If the Monk could move in this state, you're right, it would be absolutely unbalanceable.
This Monk's main job is to sit still and get in the way. Which, to some degree, is a bit of an inversion of how Monks normally work, but that's a big part of what I find appealing about homebrewing subs. How do I change a thing and still keep it that thing? What else can I make it do? That's...basically the point of homebrewing, as I see it.
Good points all around. Maybe on the Oath of Balance Aura just have it not affect the paladin themselves? Or maybe they can toggle it on/off each day? I think my main concern was it makes it impossible for the paladin themselves to ever have advantage (unless I misunderstood something). Maybe you've got a paladin player who is down with that (which is all that matters ultimately) but in my experience DM'ing for paladins they really like their advantage bc it increases the chance for crit smites.
Overall, really cool classes all around.