From the same stream, the Rogue (Arcane Trickster "Pirate") fell into the container of stolen magical power, and the DM decided that his magic would be overcharged and his illusions would actually manifest in real items. What does he do? He starts conjuring all kinds of sandwiches which start to fill up the container.
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Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Paladin Orderly [DM]: "It's my job on this side of the desk to ask questions." Tabaxi dressed as a low-ranking Paladin: *I move to the other side of the desk* "So, what's your name?" Orderly: *backhands the Tabaxi* "How dare you think you are remotely on my level!" Tabaxi: *I squat down below his height and ask again*
Later... after they changed the story for their ruse many times to get to the Cardinal Paladin's chamber who is asking what they are doing there.
Kenku (under the effects of a drug/potion that lets him speak normally): *I cast Message and ask* "What are we doing here again?" Tabaxi: *I turn to him and say* "To rob him." DM: *Aloud?* Tabaxi: *Of course* Cardinal [DM]: "If you're here to kill me, you have made the biggest mistake in your soon to be ended lives." Tabaxi: *I say to the Cardinal* "No. We're here to rob you, not kill you."
In another stream on a snowy mountain... A rabbit was found dead in a magical snare. The snare releases the rabbit which gets up and tries to hop toward a cabin further up the path. Rogue: "AHH!" *I punt it!* DM: *You punt the rabbit and hear a pooft in the distance when it lands in the snow* Bard: "I want to see how this works. Is it the trap that's reanimating the creatures and are they trying to go to the cabin?" Rogue: *I shoot a woodpecker* (rolls successfully) Rogue: *I place it in the trap and cinch it up.* DM: *Nothing happens.* Druid: "Maybe the creature has to be caught by the trap." Rogue: *I immediately wound another woodpecker.* (rolls successfully) Rogue: *I remove the dead woodpecker and place the wounded one to spring the trap* DM: *The woodpecker is thinking 'Well. This day is not going wel^URK!^' and the trap snaps its neck. After a minute, the trap releases the woodpecker and it spreads its wings--* Paladin (WIS-1): *I immediately punt the woodpecker.* Everyone else: "What?! We're trying to do science here! We want to know where it was going!" Paladin: "I thought this was just a thing we're doing." DM: *You hear the woodpecker land in the snow a ways away with a soft whoomp.*
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Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
NOOOOOO! you were supposed to charm klarg and become his lifelong friends by letting him in on the whole yeemick plot........... wait, that’s not required? Oh. *dies*
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she/it pronouns
I watch. I wait. I listen. I like roleplaying games. Avid fan of messed up homebrew and horror rpgs. Lancer>dnd5e, go read Kill Six Billion Demons. I will shoot you with my transgenderification beam pew pew
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Nice.
Hello! I am just a relatively new D&D player, who also likes SimplePlanes and War Thunder.
My characters are:
From the same stream, the Rogue (Arcane Trickster "Pirate") fell into the container of stolen magical power, and the DM decided that his magic would be overcharged and his illusions would actually manifest in real items. What does he do? He starts conjuring all kinds of sandwiches which start to fill up the container.
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
I am about to play Dragon Heist. Is it a bad thing that my character isn't in an organisation?
Hello! I am just a relatively new D&D player, who also likes SimplePlanes and War Thunder.
My characters are:
How to feed the hungry in 5 easy steps
Hello! I am just a relatively new D&D player, who also likes SimplePlanes and War Thunder.
My characters are:
“I would like to roll intimidation with a cinnamon roll”
Mostly nocturnal
help build a world here
My Druid in a nutshell xD
A different group but still a stream:
Paladin Orderly [DM]: "It's my job on this side of the desk to ask questions."
Tabaxi dressed as a low-ranking Paladin: *I move to the other side of the desk* "So, what's your name?"
Orderly: *backhands the Tabaxi* "How dare you think you are remotely on my level!"
Tabaxi: *I squat down below his height and ask again*
Later... after they changed the story for their ruse many times to get to the Cardinal Paladin's chamber who is asking what they are doing there.
Kenku (under the effects of a drug/potion that lets him speak normally): *I cast Message and ask* "What are we doing here again?"
Tabaxi: *I turn to him and say* "To rob him."
DM: *Aloud?*
Tabaxi: *Of course*
Cardinal [DM]: "If you're here to kill me, you have made the biggest mistake in your soon to be ended lives."
Tabaxi: *I say to the Cardinal* "No. We're here to rob you, not kill you."
In another stream on a snowy mountain... A rabbit was found dead in a magical snare. The snare releases the rabbit which gets up and tries to hop toward a cabin further up the path.
Rogue: "AHH!" *I punt it!*
DM: *You punt the rabbit and hear a pooft in the distance when it lands in the snow*
Bard: "I want to see how this works. Is it the trap that's reanimating the creatures and are they trying to go to the cabin?"
Rogue: *I shoot a woodpecker*
(rolls successfully)
Rogue: *I place it in the trap and cinch it up.*
DM: *Nothing happens.*
Druid: "Maybe the creature has to be caught by the trap."
Rogue: *I immediately wound another woodpecker.*
(rolls successfully)
Rogue: *I remove the dead woodpecker and place the wounded one to spring the trap*
DM: *The woodpecker is thinking 'Well. This day is not going wel^URK!^' and the trap snaps its neck. After a minute, the trap releases the woodpecker and it spreads its wings--*
Paladin (WIS-1): *I immediately punt the woodpecker.*
Everyone else: "What?! We're trying to do science here! We want to know where it was going!"
Paladin: "I thought this was just a thing we're doing."
DM: *You hear the woodpecker land in the snow a ways away with a soft whoomp.*
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
(Have you ever had players not know what a Gazebo is? All my players are young, so they don't know, and generally assume it's a monster.)
DM: You heroes approach upon the town after rescuing the villagers from another raid of goblins. The villagers are celebrating, near a Gazebo.
Player 1: What's a Gazebo? It sounds like a Xorn. I'll draw an arrow and aim it at the Gazebo.
DM: Okay, all of the villagers start screaming and duck.
Player 2: Why are they screaming? Is the Gazebo attacking them?
DM: The Gazebo is not attacking them. (facepalm)
Player 1: I intimidate the Gazebo: 11, "Leave and never come back! Also, if you have any treasure, leave it, or this arrow will go throw your throat!"
DM: No response from the Gazebo. All of the villagers start running away screaming, leaving their coins and watches on the ground.
Player 3: Wait, what happened?
Please check out my homebrew, I would appreciate feedback:
Spells, Monsters, Subclasses, Races, Arcknight Class, Occultist Class, World, Enigmatic Esoterica forms
lol
Hello! I am just a relatively new D&D player, who also likes SimplePlanes and War Thunder.
My characters are:
The fearsome gazebo strikes again
Mostly nocturnal
help build a world here
DM: A fearsome red dragon covered in scars comes out of the cliffside. What do you do?
Nazcan: I ready my greataxe
Endra Bavosk: I take out my orb
Thardrum: I scream like a little girl
Ah, Eric's legacy lives on. :)
This is a real life thing. https://darwinawards.com/stupid/stupid2018-01.html
Enjoy my magic items, spells, monsters, my race, and a few feats. And GIVE ME FEEDBACK... or else.
Like what I say?
⬐ Just press this little guy right here.
Now I want to homebrew a gazebo monster...
Please check out my homebrew and give me feedback!
Subclasses | Races | Spells | Magic Items | Monsters | Feats | Backgrounds
Can't wait until we play Dragon Heist. He'll probably snort the smokepowder, in effect turning him into a walking suicide vest.
Hello! I am just a relatively new D&D player, who also likes SimplePlanes and War Thunder.
My characters are:
What did you think of the Darwin Award?
Enjoy my magic items, spells, monsters, my race, and a few feats. And GIVE ME FEEDBACK... or else.
Like what I say?
⬐ Just press this little guy right here.
The walking suicide vest or the link?
Hello! I am just a relatively new D&D player, who also likes SimplePlanes and War Thunder.
My characters are:
The link
Enjoy my magic items, spells, monsters, my race, and a few feats. And GIVE ME FEEDBACK... or else.
Like what I say?
⬐ Just press this little guy right here.
Dying Klarg: You won't be able to defeat the Black Spider.
Paladin: Wait, is he a man? Is he a spider? What is he?
Klarg: *dies*
This became a running joke at our table. Later in the campaign, after the Black Spider has been killed:
Paladin: So, he wasn't a spider after all.
Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1!
Never tell me the DC.
NOOOOOO! you were supposed to charm klarg and become his lifelong friends by letting him in on the whole yeemick plot........... wait, that’s not required? Oh. *dies*
she/it pronouns
I watch. I wait. I listen. I like roleplaying games. Avid fan of messed up homebrew and horror rpgs. Lancer>dnd5e, go read Kill Six Billion Demons. I will shoot you with my transgenderification beam pew pew