Player 1: "It's just breathing." Player 4: "There's a difference between breathing and screaming." Player 1: "Screaming is a form of breathing, just louder."
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Ranger: I throw a Sleep blast-disk under her feet. GM: You sure? Ranger: Yes. GM: Roll for it. Ranger: 54. GM: So it's enough to put to sleep three characters with the lowest current HP in the blast. Which is [Priest], [Druid's] Fey spirit and you. Ranger: Wait, it had a blast radius?
Life is very busy unfortunately, gone from most Pbp's indefinitely. If you'd like to contact me, I am on Discord at GreatAxeblade#7595, always happy to chat :)
Some funny quotes from today's two shot (would've been a one shot, but we'll have to finish another day):
Human Rogue/Bard (Me): So, everyone, we're going to meet with a fellow who claims to have sacred instruments of elemental foresight. Not sure what that means or what it does, but if we're here, why not find out? Half-Elf Barbarian: That sounds crazy powerful!! Let's find him! Aarocokra Fighter: heh, sounds like a loon. sure, let’s pay ‘em a visit.
Barbarian (Naming the three camels): Okay. So the biggest one, that's Sir Humphrey the II. The smallest is Echo. And the 3rd one..... insert Sylvan word for Camel here
Yuan-Ti Shopkeeper: They arr deevicesss, wondrus con-trap-tionsss of oracle-iiing! To preedict the tempessstuous powerss of nayture! Alsssso, a tea-pot!
Yuan-Ti Shopkeeper (describing one of his contraptions): You rollll theee skull-on-wheellssss outsside when the ice iss thrown at yoo. If thee hail or frozan raain falsth on it and iiit do not brek thee skull, or skkkeen, then isth thsayfe to bee oussidde. And if iiit RIIIP! skkkeen and SHMASH!! skkkull and mud go SHSPLORSSH!!!!, then yor head go RIIIP! SHMASH!! SHSPLORSSH!!!! too.
Barbarian: I'm not really a tea person unfortunate-tea.......I'm sorry that was horrible...but sometimes you think a pun will be good...but then it sounds awkward out loud. DM (as Yuan-Ti Shopkeeper): He puts the teapot down on his stove. "Gassssp! You no like teeeaaaa?????? Blassssphemyyy!" His hair poofs up and he hisses. Rogue/Bard: More for us, then. Changeling Sorceress: *snickers* Shopkeeper: DO NOT LAUGH AT MEEEE!!!! AM BIG POWERFULL COBR- EMPEROR YUAN-TI! BEWARES MY SCARY VENOM! NO LAUGH *proceeds to throw a fit*
Shopkeeper: YOU HASSS HURT MY FEELINGSSSS! YOU HURT MY FEELINGSSS SSSSO BAD I DIE!" He flops on the ground dramatically.
Elemental who the rogue/bard is trying to help: Okay, "Damien"... that's nice of you... it was also nice of the last guy who came here five years ago... and that lady ten years ago... and that dragon, I guess, he didn't have good intentions, but I would've taken what I could've gotten... Rogue/Bard: We killed that dragon. Elemental: You killed the dragon? ...I guess that makes you more qualified than everyone else.
Rogue/Bard is contemplating doing something risky, with the rest of the party waiting behind as backup. They don't know what he's thinking of. Barbarian: You guys think Damien is doing alright? Sorceress: Sure. He’s smart, he’ll be careful. Barbarian's player, OOC: The party: talking about how Damien is careful. The player: how chaotic do I go?
The rogue/bard did do the crazy thing. It went fine. We just blew up the three werejackals, no problems at all. XD
[Fighter]'s head darts from the piles of ash, to [Rogue], to [Sorceress], and back to the ash
Fighter: dying and being... enslaved one can assume... weren’t exactly things i was planning for today Barbarian: Oh...But think of the flex if we best them!!
Barbarian's player, OOC: Today we learned setting things on fire is cool
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Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken. Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing. Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan. Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer. Plays god on Saturdays.
Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken. Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing. Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan. Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer. Plays god on Saturdays.
From a stream: TTRPG? Yes. Campaign? Yes. D&D? No.
This is kind of a rapid fire series of quotes, best transcribed.
In a previous heist, the party had tricked a pair of creepy kids from one of the city's prominent gangs that deals in the supernatural by selling the kids a no-longer-cursed artifact to them for 10 coin that the kids expected to still be cursed. (8 of those coin were spent to pay off a dead man's debt that the party unwillingly inherited.)
One of the player characters, [Slide], was kidnapped just before the end of the prior heist (aka. wasn't going to be able to attend this session). [Slide] had hidden the heist's take - intended to be later retrieved after the place had closed and everyone had left - only to be kidnapped before he could tell anyone where. The party is broke because [Slide] used all their available funds during the heist, expecting to get it all back. The captors are apparently unaware of this information. At the hideout/front, the remaining party received something wet and bloody wrapped in a piece of [Slide]'s coat - the 4th coat in as many heists, each prior ruined during the heist except the last one.
[Leech]: Would you say that the coat is ruined? GM: [Leech]. I'm saying the coat is ruined. [Whisper]: "Again? OMG. Every time." [Cutter]: "This was his latest favoritest [sic] coat." [Leech]: I'll carry this into the room and place it on a table or something. [Cutter]: "Is it his eyes and teeth and tongue?" [Leech]: "Oh. I'm hoping it's not eyes and teeth and tongue." [Spider]: "I'm betting fingers." [Leech]: "Fingers? ... Well, he had two ears. Didn't he? Probably could be one of them there as well." [Cutter]: "[Whisper]. You want in on this action? You wanna bet on what's in this sticky bundle?" [Leech]: "It's probably one or all of the spare bits he's got. So... an ear... maybe a finger." [Spider]: "No one's bet on organs yet, [Whisper]." [Leech]: "Yeah. Could be a kidney in there." [Whisper]: "Yeah. Could be-oh god." GM: I'll tell you what. Everyone place a bet on what's in here, and we'll do an actual round. There'll be a reward if you get it. [Cutter]: "It's a bad outcome if any of us are right." [Leech]: "Testicle." GM:' Testicle,' says [Leech]. [Spider]: [Spider] is saying, 'fingers.' [Leech]: "I'm all in." [Cutter]: "Eyes and tongue and teeth." [Whisper]: "I'm going to go for kidney. I'm going to go for kidney. Why not?" GM: Okay. As you tentatively unwrap this package, [Leech], you are dismayed for a number of reasons - partially by what you see and partially because you've lost the bet. [Leech]: "Aw." GM: [Spider] is actually closest. It's [Slide]'s whole forearm - severed and bleeding freely- Party gasps in dismay and disgust. GM: -identifiable by a family ring. [Leech]: How is his ring on his forearm? GM: It's on his finger. [Leech]: Oh! So, it's his whole arm from his elbow. [Cutter]: It's not just this section from wrist to elbow. GM: <sarcastically> Oh, no. They let him keep the hand attached to the elbow. <back on track> Anyway as you all look at it horrified, however, it seems to dissolve away into a sort-of-blue light to leave a scrap of parchment there which reads, [Leech], 'Tricked you! You'll get the real thing and more besides unless you bring us our 10 coin.' [Spider]: "Alright. Pay up. Come on." [Leech]: "Pay up?" [Spider]: "Yeah. It was fingers." [Leech]: "Oh. Right. Sure. I thought you meant pay them. What if I were to create some kind of wonderful mechanical man into which we could program the consciousness of [Slide] and, then, he could tell us where all our money is and, then, we wouldn't have to rescue [Slide]?" [Whisper]: "Well, the problem is-" [Leech]: I start building a wonderful mechanical man. [Whisper] "-we would be the ones programming it. It would only know what we tell it. It'll be only as smart as we allow it to be." [Leech]: "Yes, but how complex really was [Slide]'s personality? I think we could probably put that together." [Spider]: "Exactly." GM: <sarcastically> You could simply tell the mechanical man, 'You know where the money is.' [Leech]: "Yeah, and off he would trot. I think it's a flawless plan," I say perusing through a chest of pipes and socket wrenches and things of that nature. [Whisper]: "I think that the problem is that [Slide] isn't that complicated. So, he does things slightly at random which is quite difficult to predict on a computational-" GM: -He operates on an uncomputable [sic] quantum level, you're saying. [Whisper]: Yeah. [Leech]: "I really think you're overthinking this," I say to [Whipser] as I place a bucket on top of a broomstick and draw [Slide]'s face on it. GM: While [Leech] creates... what did you call it? [Leech]: A wonderful mechanical man. GM: While [Leech] works on his wonderful mechanical man, the rest of you settle around the table, maybe brew some coffee. It has become clear that, if you want your money back - and I suppose if you want [Slide] back, you will need to come up with a plan and fast.
If you're interested in this weirdness and more, feel free to check out the same folks who played many, many hilarious one-shot 5e D&D campaigns in a different TTRPG. (The first episode sets the setting - same world as their D&D campaigns but in a steam-punk far-flung future - and the first one also covers nearly all the few and simple rules.)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
"No, thanks. The last time I slept like a baby, I woke up every 3 hours demanding to be changed."
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Naibs of Dune, I'm the supreme meowster of the cult of cats!, Head lobotomizer of the OIADSB cult, I've got a thieves guild, come join, Warlock main in D2.
Don't forget to love each other!
I play characters at taverns.
[ He/him ] [Shout out to my 11 followers] [ If you think I haven't responded to something check my posts.]
Join Calius & Kothar industries. We have good pay, plus dental! see tavern for details
Barbarian: "There's more in the sack for your team...if you hire us."
Long story short, we became the caravan's bodyguards.
That reminds me of a dream I had, where I was a fugitive for a crime I didn't commit, but I got the police to stop chasing me by giving them some extremely delicious cookies. XD
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken. Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing. Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan. Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer. Plays god on Saturdays.
Player 1: Two-hand spear strike, followed by an unarmed martial arts strike as a bonus action. Having blocked the last attack with the metal butt of her spear, Sutras continues the rotation over her shoulder, letting it fall behind her back. With the weapon held just above her hips, she tilts and pirouettes at high speed for a broad slashing arch. Stopping suddenly, she drops into a crouch at the end of the spin, the spear now vertical, having put her waifish bird-girl weight and momentum entirely into a ball-popping elbow strike. Looking up to see her opponent's expression, she gives him a wink.
Player 2: See this is why you are fun to play with. That could have just been the first sentence.
OOC2: I think (Insert Name) just got himself put on an FBI watchlist.
OOC3: (Nervous laughter) Wouldn't be the first time...
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The Tavern Mother (Trust me, it's not as weird as it sounds!)
I am the God-Queen of Trickery, Cunning, Lies, and Gaslighting- but you already knew that... "Moon's Haunted." *Cocks shotgun with malicious intent* "Eliksni must rise...yes?" _________ When it comes to pronouns I preferVariks-Senpai(But I'm a dude. Pronouns are weird.)
Rogue (Thief): I <roll> shank him in the kidney for <roll> 42 damage, then steal his ring. GM: The ring he's currently wearing? I would require Sleight of Hand on difficulty 25. That's some serious street magician trick. Rogue: <rolls> 32 GM: How? Rogue: Rogue.
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From a stream:
Player 1: "It's just breathing."
Player 4: "There's a difference between breathing and screaming."
Player 1: "Screaming is a form of breathing, just louder."
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Ranger: I throw a Sleep blast-disk under her feet.
GM: You sure?
Ranger: Yes.
GM: Roll for it.
Ranger: 54.
GM: So it's enough to put to sleep three characters with the lowest current HP in the blast. Which is [Priest], [Druid's] Fey spirit and you.
Ranger: Wait, it had a blast radius?
54?!
◎
sleep HP
Life is very busy unfortunately, gone from most Pbp's indefinitely.
If you'd like to contact me, I am on Discord at GreatAxeblade#7595, always happy to chat :)
Homebrew races: ~Otterfolk! Play as a otter!~ Playable Dryad! (Literally just the monster sheet ported to player race)
Sauce Archpriest!- Join the Supreme Court of Sauces! Join the Cult of Cults! EXTENDED SIGNATURE Tooltips
Some funny quotes from today's two shot (would've been a one shot, but we'll have to finish another day):
Human Rogue/Bard (Me): So, everyone, we're going to meet with a fellow who claims to have sacred instruments of elemental foresight. Not sure what that means or what it does, but if we're here, why not find out?
Half-Elf Barbarian: That sounds crazy powerful!! Let's find him!
Aarocokra Fighter: heh, sounds like a loon. sure, let’s pay ‘em a visit.
Barbarian (Naming the three camels): Okay. So the biggest one, that's Sir Humphrey the II. The smallest is Echo. And the 3rd one..... insert Sylvan word for Camel here
Yuan-Ti Shopkeeper: They arr deevicesss, wondrus con-trap-tionsss of oracle-iiing! To preedict the tempessstuous powerss of nayture! Alsssso, a tea-pot!
Yuan-Ti Shopkeeper (describing one of his contraptions): You rollll theee skull-on-wheellssss outsside when the ice iss thrown at yoo. If thee hail or frozan raain falsth on it and iiit do not brek thee skull, or skkkeen, then isth thsayfe to bee oussidde. And if iiit RIIIP! skkkeen and SHMASH!! skkkull and mud go SHSPLORSSH!!!!, then yor head go RIIIP! SHMASH!! SHSPLORSSH!!!! too.
Barbarian: I'm not really a tea person unfortunate-tea.......I'm sorry that was horrible...but sometimes you think a pun will be good...but then it sounds awkward out loud.
DM (as Yuan-Ti Shopkeeper): He puts the teapot down on his stove. "Gassssp! You no like teeeaaaa?????? Blassssphemyyy!" His hair poofs up and he hisses.
Rogue/Bard: More for us, then.
Changeling Sorceress: *snickers*
Shopkeeper: DO NOT LAUGH AT MEEEE!!!! AM BIG POWERFULL COBR- EMPEROR YUAN-TI! BEWARES MY SCARY VENOM! NO LAUGH *proceeds to throw a fit*
Shopkeeper: YOU HASSS HURT MY FEELINGSSSS! YOU HURT MY FEELINGSSS SSSSO BAD I DIE!" He flops on the ground dramatically.
Elemental who the rogue/bard is trying to help: Okay, "Damien"... that's nice of you... it was also nice of the last guy who came here five years ago... and that lady ten years ago... and that dragon, I guess, he didn't have good intentions, but I would've taken what I could've gotten...
Rogue/Bard: We killed that dragon.
Elemental: You killed the dragon? ...I guess that makes you more qualified than everyone else.
Rogue/Bard is contemplating doing something risky, with the rest of the party waiting behind as backup. They don't know what he's thinking of.
Barbarian: You guys think Damien is doing alright?
Sorceress: Sure. He’s smart, he’ll be careful.
Barbarian's player, OOC: The party: talking about how Damien is careful. The player: how chaotic do I go?
The rogue/bard did do the crazy thing. It went fine. We just blew up the three werejackals, no problems at all. XD
[Fighter]'s head darts from the piles of ash, to [Rogue], to [Sorceress], and back to the ash
Fighter: dying and being... enslaved one can assume... weren’t exactly things i was planning for today
Barbarian: Oh...But think of the flex if we best them!!
Barbarian's player, OOC: Today we learned setting things on fire is cool
Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken.
Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing.
Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan.
Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer.
Plays god on Saturdays.
This is all that I could ask for, thank you for the good laugh
Glad you enjoyed it! :D
Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken.
Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing.
Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan.
Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer.
Plays god on Saturdays.
From a stream: TTRPG? Yes. Campaign? Yes.
D&D? No.
This is kind of a rapid fire series of quotes, best transcribed.
In a previous heist, the party had tricked a pair of creepy kids from one of the city's prominent gangs that deals in the supernatural by selling the kids a no-longer-cursed artifact to them for 10 coin that the kids expected to still be cursed. (8 of those coin were spent to pay off a dead man's debt that the party unwillingly inherited.)
One of the player characters, [Slide], was kidnapped just before the end of the prior heist (aka. wasn't going to be able to attend this session). [Slide] had hidden the heist's take - intended to be later retrieved after the place had closed and everyone had left - only to be kidnapped before he could tell anyone where. The party is broke because [Slide] used all their available funds during the heist, expecting to get it all back. The captors are apparently unaware of this information. At the hideout/front, the remaining party received something wet and bloody wrapped in a piece of [Slide]'s coat - the 4th coat in as many heists, each prior ruined during the heist except the last one.
[Leech]: Would you say that the coat is ruined?
GM: [Leech]. I'm saying the coat is ruined.
[Whisper]: "Again? OMG. Every time."
[Cutter]: "This was his latest favoritest [sic] coat."
[Leech]: I'll carry this into the room and place it on a table or something.
[Cutter]: "Is it his eyes and teeth and tongue?"
[Leech]: "Oh. I'm hoping it's not eyes and teeth and tongue."
[Spider]: "I'm betting fingers."
[Leech]: "Fingers? ... Well, he had two ears. Didn't he? Probably could be one of them there as well."
[Cutter]: "[Whisper]. You want in on this action? You wanna bet on what's in this sticky bundle?"
[Leech]: "It's probably one or all of the spare bits he's got. So... an ear... maybe a finger."
[Spider]: "No one's bet on organs yet, [Whisper]."
[Leech]: "Yeah. Could be a kidney in there."
[Whisper]: "Yeah. Could be-oh god."
GM: I'll tell you what. Everyone place a bet on what's in here, and we'll do an actual round. There'll be a reward if you get it.
[Cutter]: "It's a bad outcome if any of us are right."
[Leech]: "Testicle."
GM:' Testicle,' says [Leech].
[Spider]: [Spider] is saying, 'fingers.'
[Leech]: "I'm all in."
[Cutter]: "Eyes and tongue and teeth."
[Whisper]: "I'm going to go for kidney. I'm going to go for kidney. Why not?"
GM: Okay. As you tentatively unwrap this package, [Leech], you are dismayed for a number of reasons - partially by what you see and partially because you've lost the bet.
[Leech]: "Aw."
GM: [Spider] is actually closest. It's [Slide]'s whole forearm - severed and bleeding freely-
Party gasps in dismay and disgust.
GM: -identifiable by a family ring.
[Leech]: How is his ring on his forearm?
GM: It's on his finger.
[Leech]: Oh! So, it's his whole arm from his elbow.
[Cutter]: It's not just this section from wrist to elbow.
GM: <sarcastically> Oh, no. They let him keep the hand attached to the elbow. <back on track> Anyway as you all look at it horrified, however, it seems to dissolve away into a sort-of-blue light to leave a scrap of parchment there which reads, [Leech], 'Tricked you! You'll get the real thing and more besides unless you bring us our 10 coin.'
[Spider]: "Alright. Pay up. Come on."
[Leech]: "Pay up?"
[Spider]: "Yeah. It was fingers."
[Leech]: "Oh. Right. Sure. I thought you meant pay them. What if I were to create some kind of wonderful mechanical man into which we could program the consciousness of [Slide] and, then, he could tell us where all our money is and, then, we wouldn't have to rescue [Slide]?"
[Whisper]: "Well, the problem is-"
[Leech]: I start building a wonderful mechanical man.
[Whisper] "-we would be the ones programming it. It would only know what we tell it. It'll be only as smart as we allow it to be."
[Leech]: "Yes, but how complex really was [Slide]'s personality? I think we could probably put that together."
[Spider]: "Exactly."
GM: <sarcastically> You could simply tell the mechanical man, 'You know where the money is.'
[Leech]: "Yeah, and off he would trot. I think it's a flawless plan," I say perusing through a chest of pipes and socket wrenches and things of that nature.
[Whisper]: "I think that the problem is that [Slide] isn't that complicated. So, he does things slightly at random which is quite difficult to predict on a computational-"
GM: -He operates on an uncomputable [sic] quantum level, you're saying.
[Whisper]: Yeah.
[Leech]: "I really think you're overthinking this," I say to [Whipser] as I place a bucket on top of a broomstick and draw [Slide]'s face on it.
GM: While [Leech] creates... what did you call it?
[Leech]: A wonderful mechanical man.
GM: While [Leech] works on his wonderful mechanical man, the rest of you settle around the table, maybe brew some coffee. It has become clear that, if you want your money back - and I suppose if you want [Slide] back, you will need to come up with a plan and fast.
If you're interested in this weirdness and more, feel free to check out the same folks who played many, many hilarious one-shot 5e D&D campaigns in a different TTRPG. (The first episode sets the setting - same world as their D&D campaigns but in a steam-punk far-flung future - and the first one also covers nearly all the few and simple rules.)
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Recently: Character was suffering from insomnia.
"This spell will make you sleep like a baby."
"No, thanks. The last time I slept like a baby, I woke up every 3 hours demanding to be changed."
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
"All elves eat tree bark...everybody knows that."
Barbarian: "Perhaps I can persuade you...with one of these?"
(proceeds to pull out a chocolate muffin from a sack)
Caravan Leader: "You're attempting to ingratiate yourself with my team using baked goods?"
Barbarian: "Just try it."
(the Caravan Leader sighs, then takes the muffin and has a bite)
(...his eyes widen...)
Caravan Leader: "That's...that's quite good, actually."
Barbarian: "There's more in the sack for your team...if you hire us."
Long story short, we became the caravan's bodyguards.
this was from a PM:
[kal ]Sad kal noises.
Naibs of Dune, I'm the supreme meowster of the cult of cats!, Head lobotomizer of the OIADSB cult, I've got a thieves guild, come join, Warlock main in D2.
Don't forget to love each other!
I play characters at taverns.
[ He/him ] [Shout out to my 11 followers] [ If you think I haven't responded to something check my posts.]
Join Calius & Kothar industries. We have good pay, plus dental! see tavern for details
"Atilla's Cupcakes are Sublime!"
Make your Artificer work with any other class with 174 Multiclassing Feats for your Artificer Multiclass Character!
DM's Guild Releases on This Thread Or check them all out on DMs Guild!
DrivethruRPG Releases on This Thread - latest release: My Character is a Werewolf: balanced rules for Lycanthropy!
I have started discussing/reviewing 3rd party D&D content on Substack - stay tuned for semi-regular posts!
That reminds me of a dream I had, where I was a fugitive for a crime I didn't commit, but I got the police to stop chasing me by giving them some extremely delicious cookies. XD
Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken.
Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing.
Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan.
Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer.
Plays god on Saturdays.
Priest: Group hugs!
Druid: I turn into giant constrictor snake.
"guys it will be fine"
famous last qoute
Player 1: Two-hand spear strike, followed by an unarmed martial arts strike as a bonus action. Having blocked the last attack with the metal butt of her spear, Sutras continues the rotation over her shoulder, letting it fall behind her back. With the weapon held just above her hips, she tilts and pirouettes at high speed for a broad slashing arch. Stopping suddenly, she drops into a crouch at the end of the spin, the spear now vertical, having put her waifish bird-girl weight and momentum entirely into a ball-popping elbow strike. Looking up to see her opponent's expression, she gives him a wink.
Player 2: See this is why you are fun to play with. That could have just been the first sentence.
OOC1: What happened?
OOC2: I think (Insert Name) just got himself put on an FBI watchlist.
OOC3: (Nervous laughter) Wouldn't be the first time...
The Tavern Mother (Trust me, it's not as weird as it sounds!)
I am the God-Queen of Trickery, Cunning, Lies, and Gaslighting- but you already knew that...
"Moon's Haunted." *Cocks shotgun with malicious intent*
"Eliksni must rise...yes?"
_________
When it comes to pronouns I prefer Variks-Senpai (But I'm a dude. Pronouns are weird.)
Them snakes do give great hugz!
Rogue (Thief): I <roll> shank him in the kidney for <roll> 42 damage, then steal his ring.
GM: The ring he's currently wearing? I would require Sleight of Hand on difficulty 25. That's some serious street magician trick.
Rogue: <rolls> 32
GM: How?
Rogue: Rogue.