I collected a bunch of 'slightly off' magic items for a game a few years ago, most blatantly stolen from the interwebs (apologies, and thanks). But holy cow, did the party have fun with that game...and many more to come.
The gnome Bosco Twinklebottom was a self-professed master of the arcane, and was obsessed with creating the 'perfect' magic item. He was also as crazy as an outhouse rat, if that rat was convinced he was a powerful dragon, polymorphed and trapped in this lowly form. Originally meant as a single encounter NPC, the party absolutely loved the character...hence began the hunt for the Dragognomicon.
Along the way, the party discovered a few of his 'inventions'. Here are a few of my favorites...
Cloak of Awe - On entering a room with the cloak in one's possession, a flock of pigeons fly through the doorway behind you, and trumpet fanfare plays. The larger the room, the more impressive the effect (more pigeons, longer fanfare). Has the unfortunate effect of activating ever time one enters a room. Every. Single. Time.
(Much to my chagrin, our party rogue seized this item. This got put to creative and quite hilarious use in future sessions.)
A set of six potions: Grasshopper's Strength, Rhino's Grace, Mayfly's Endurance, Sheep's Cunning, Lemming's Wisdom, and Warthog's Splendor.
Failed spell scrolls: several pages have stuck together, so instead of Locate Object, Magic Mouth, Burning Hands, etc...we get Burning Mouth (it burns!), Locate Hands (there they are!), Animate Food and Water, Dispel Armor (poof, naked), Power Word: Self (you are the you-iest you you can be).
Ring of Fire Detection, range: touch.
Deck of Many Thongs - each card depicts elderly gnome ladies in lingerie.
I am partial to creating defective magic/prank items in my campaigns, like the amulet of weather scrying: once a day it tells you the weather. The cloak of ‘blending’: A magic cloak with four clasps and a personalized name plate of Mae Tagge, but when you cover your head with the hood, the cloak deals increased damage and differing damage type based on the number of clasps connected (1d4 slashing for 1 clasp, 2d6 bludgeoning for 2 clasps, 3d8 piercing for 3 clasps, and 4d10 fire for all 4 clasps). The early zombie/undead warning charm: a magic charm that activates the alarm spell whenever a zombie or undead comes within 30 feet of it at night. Unfortunately, it also has the drawback of luring 1d6 undead/zombies to it’s general location each night. The Super Awesome book of Amazing knowledge! A cursed book of ‘awesome’ knowledge, once attuned, (after 24 hrs in someone’s possession) user can look up any information in the book, the first time will get a super in depth and detailed response. The next 5 uses will be more generic but still provide solid details. After the fifth use, and after every five uses onwards, user loses 1 point of intelligence and the information retrieved becomes much less helpful, but the user continues to think it is super awesome because they don’t realize they are losing intelligence. Until they get to an INT of 2-3, when the book gives out really mundane facts like ‘the sky is blue’ ‘Fire is hot’ ‘the sea is really big and deep’ the belt of disguise self: 3 times a day, when worn, user can cast disguise self on them but only in the form of themself. The ring of invisibility: a ring that when attuned, becomes invisible when worn. The vorpal spork of Fumblez: a rusty spork that when attuned magically replaces user’s weapon with it and decapitates an enemy on a crit fumble, however, on a crit success it intervenes by stabbing user in their leg for 1d4 piercing damage and they must make a DC12 CON save vs. poison (dang tetanus). Wondrous figurine of little yellow duck: a small figurine of a little yellow duck, that magically reappears in the vicinity of a target every night, no matter what they do to get rid of it. (Doesn’t really do that much, but just for the LOLZ, in almost every campaign I run, I throw in a crazy NPC that suffers from the phobia of them always being watched by a duck, so I give my PC’s this item so they can torment that NPC when they run into them)
A particular one I created that was fun is the very pretty rock. It is a small rock with a rune on it. When the command word is spoken it becomes magically pretty compelling anyone who sees it to just stare at it and do nothing else. The save is a DC 20 Wisdom save. Pretty funny when the first few turns of an encounter was just everyone staring at a rock.
I’ve done a much more devious version of that, except it’s a crystal jar/vase with a bunch of money and shiny gems inside of it. However, the opening is too small for a player to reach in and pull out its contents with a clenched hand. And any PC that fails the wisdom save to resist the urge to keep the jar and its contents becomes paranoid like Gollum and distrusts even their fellow party members.
i came across a dm who gave me a ring it ended up being a sentient magic item that could change my race as it so pleased do you know how hard it is being a halfling rouge sneaking into a prizon and in the middle of the prison turning into a giant (he had a roll chart for the race) yea it sucked log story short i killed a few guards and had to set loose the prisoners to get to the party and rescue them and get outa town we cant go back there now and occasinally we run into bounty hunters and assassins
This is pretty funny. Was it the Ring of Random Races?
I made a home brew item known as the trickster cards, and they can be really helpful at times, but it all relies on a roll. for example, one of the cards can explode like a grenade, while one of them turns into a plump goblin that starts dancing and then it melts into a puddle of ice cream.
Le Petomane's Magic Beans - If you've never heard of Le Petomane, google him now; amazing. These beans, when eaten, allow a bard to use an action to literally whistle "Dixie" (or any tune of their choosing) from their anatomical nether regions. The effect of the beans lasts 24 hours and is usable as many times as desired in that time. The DM may choose to randomly complicate this by having the bard save against an involuntary performance such as "Your party has failed to surprise the hobgoblins because of the sounds of the "Imperial March" being played by the bard's bowels."
Blue Shield of Death - A beautiful topaz blue kite shield found proudly displayed. When donned, the character's vision goes blue and sees the following message in the air before them "This system has experienced a critical error which cannot be resolved, and will now restart." The character is reset to Lvl 1, with 0 XP. All equipment, wealth, etc. is reset back to starting values.
Wand of S word +2 Creation - May come wrapped in a short scroll, or by Identify, the finder learns that by pointing the wand (which holds a single non-refillable charge) at any character and chanting the magic words "Caca Doo Doo" it gives the character S word with a +2 against dexterity saves. These instructions should be written and given to the player, not spoke to the player aloud. The fun is in the player misreading S_word as Sword. When cast, the wand creates a pile of dooky which the receiving character must roll a dex check to save against slipping and falling prone in.
Izzy the Imp's Wands of Flame - found in a small palm-size box are 1d6 tiny wands with red tips. A wand when rubbed against the side of the box (which has the words 'strike here' printed on it) ignite and burn 1d4 seconds. There is a 15% chance the wand will break when attempting to light, an 85% chance a slight breeze will blow out the flame before any object may be lit from it, and a 10% chance of receiving 1HP burn damage from either holding the wand too long or dropping it on oneself.
Blue Shield of Death - A beautiful topaz blue kite shield found proudly displayed. When donned, the character's vision goes blue and sees the following message in the air before them "This system has experienced a critical error which cannot be resolved, and will now restart." The character is reset to Lvl 1, with 0 XP. All equipment, wealth, etc. is reset back to starting values.
This would work well as a legit cursed item if you tone down the effects. Imagine a Blue Spellbook of Death, which gives some benefit but occasionally crashes and purges its pages for a day, or wipes a wizard of their prepared spells. Or even simpler an item which spontaneously un-attunes.
Izzy the Imp's Wands of Flame - found in a small palm-size box are 1d6 tiny wands with red tips. A wand when rubbed against the side of the box (which has the words 'strike here' printed on it) ignite and burn 1d4 seconds. There is a 15% chance the wand will break when attempting to light, an 85% chance a slight breeze will blow out the flame before any object may be lit from it, and a 10% chance of receiving 1HP burn damage from either holding the wand too long or dropping it on oneself.
that is just mundane matches, right? (though I think it needs a 99% chance that a slight breeze will blow out the flame before any object may be lit from it from experience with such things... 😹)
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So far this session, I have killed three pets, four teammates, and only hit the enemy once, and my fire bolt didn't work against a creature immune to fire. Trust me, you NEVER want to borrow my character or my dice.
I made my campaign magic heavy, so I felt the need to put in some odd magic items.
Some of them include:
A spoon that makes ice cubes if you scoop up some water with it. It's not quite an ice cream scoop...
A retrocasual potion that has already helped a guy the party has never met, and needs to be drank by said individual some time in the future or something bad will happen to them because it couldn't have helped them back then. It was a new party, so if I ever wanted a single person deus ex machina before that point, it would have helped them, and be their name on the potion instead of some random person's, so they'd have to decide if they wanted to risk paying the piper.
A pair of defective (not cursed) magical shoes that make the person wearing them walk quieter and jump higher, but it does so by storing up some of their noise and weight, and when too much has been stored up (each on a separate cycle) it either releases a loud boom or becomes incredibly heavy and causes the wearer to fall prone without warning.
First-time DM playing with a friend who has a preference for family-friendly storylines, I needed something cute to spice things up. Enter the Pinwheel of Prestidigitation.
This is intended to be a young wizard's very first attempt at crafting a magic item, which he is exceedingly proud of, but has several issues. Namely, it is meant to mimic the effects of the Prestidigitation cantrip when you spin it... but instead of getting to choose which of its several harmless effects it causes, you roll on a small random table that I made inspired by the description of the actual spell. So you can get something pretty like sparks or music or a nice smell, but also a terrible stench or a faceful of mud (inspired by the "instantly soil" part). Also, when you expend its last charge, it risks falling apart and being lost forever.
I have several good ones. The Pair of Mystical Undies is probably my favorite. It lets you teleport anywhere within 60ft but you cant be wearing anything over the undies for them to function
I recently released the Slippers of the Somnambulist; while wearing these slippers if you become stunned or unconscious you can choose to become somnambulant which lets you still move around and do things in a limited way, it consumes the item's charge, or you can choose to take exhaustion (after the effect ends) to use it again.
Basically it's a pair of slippers that allow a player to be knocked out cold and still wander away in search of help, or to get some work done while they sleep. It does have some potential for abuse, but it should be manageable (as a KO'd character still takes death saves and fails them if they take damage).
I also like to imagine them like the Escort Boots from Red Dwarf's "Justice" episode, where they do the walking for you (when you're stunned/unconscious at least). 😂
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Former D&D Beyond Customer of six years: With the axing of piecemeal purchasing, lack of meaningful development, and toxic moderation the site isn't worth paying for anymore. I remain a free user only until my groups are done migrating from DDB, and if necessary D&D, after which I'm done. There are better systems owned by better companies out there.
I have unsubscribed from all topics and will not reply to messages. My homebrew is now 100% unsupported.
I read the title and would like to tell you about one very silly magic item i made.
When i was a kid i barely discovered D&D and i really liked the idea of it so i went to playing, and i decided to make my own magic items. In my homebrew files i found yesterday a magic item called "Herbert" apparently whenever you kill a monster you get a Herbert token? that's all it had i think i was thinking of making a Herbert shop or something but i thought it was weird and wanted to find a thread to post it on.
I’ve done a much more devious version of that, except it’s a crystal jar/vase with a bunch of money and shiny gems inside of it. However, the opening is too small for a player to reach in and pull out its contents with a clenched hand. And any PC that fails the wisdom save to resist the urge to keep the jar and its contents becomes paranoid like Gollum and distrusts even their fellow party members.
So it's basically a lobster/monkey trap for players. Love it!
I've thought of another one: Earmuffs of Muzak. They exist as a pair. Generally, they can be pressed against the head once to play music or to switch to a different type of music. There are 8 settings, not including "off" - this allows for simulation of random listening via dice roll. They play loud enough to decrease Perception checks based on hearing by 3. However, besides their being something to chill to, they also may have the following effects. If two creatures both have their Earmuffs of Muzak tuned to the same music and they are more 200 feet but within 5 miles of each other, they switch places. On the other hand, if they are both tuned to opposite "channels" on the wheel (imagine a roulette wheel) used to operate the Earmuffs (1 being the opposite of 4, 2 being the opposite of 5, 3 being the opposite of 6, etc.), then they each have a 25% chance of falling asleep each minute if the listener is not engaged in a strenuous activity (like combat).
Well, For my players (+ when I was a player) I made items such as "FORGIES" where they throw frogs at the enemy, I've made "Stick" which is a shiny stick that they can beat people with, One of my players asked if I could make an attack called "Eye Poke" which is self explanatory, I made "*BOOK* The Guin Saga" Which "147 volumes + 26 side-story Novels. Start reading the books, this takes forever. this makes your opponent go insane, and as you finish the series plus the side stories, your opponent’s head explodes" (that's the description), also made "Gaslighting" and "Frying Pan"
I remember a time, it was a very Monte Hall environment, we came of with a a spell the was only really useful against small armies... or a large summer picnics. It was dubbed Hot Fudge Army.
Remember the Monte Hall environment. The original version took a number of Clerics, or a high level Magic User with a wish spell. Either way it takes time to set up, but that time doesn't have to be during the battle.
If clerics are doing it, they use Create Food/water, make sure to have enough cleric to cover a good portion of the army. Create about 1,000 gallons of hard frozen ice cream 500 above the army so it drops doing I don't remember how much damage. I just remember it was a lot. If you you want to do the math the formulas are available. Follow with about 1,000 gallons of boiling fudge sauce, followed by a couple hundred pounds of chopped nuts, followed by a 100 lb. (Ok, I'm a yank) cherry bomb, that explodes on impact.
Most armies will break if you drop this anywhere near the commanders.
If I remember right the original idea was thought up by a faerie dragon... :blush:
A very Monte Hall solution to a large army battle!
Now you could set all the spells up on a charm of some kind, that can be pulled out at need, and generally found, if at all, in the place armory.
You could have the same effect with a good & well worded wish spell.
To guarantee they don't return, have a party follow them, and when they stop to camp for the night, wait until the settle in to sleep & repeat Hot Fudge Army. They will never return.
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I collected a bunch of 'slightly off' magic items for a game a few years ago, most blatantly stolen from the interwebs (apologies, and thanks). But holy cow, did the party have fun with that game...and many more to come.
The gnome Bosco Twinklebottom was a self-professed master of the arcane, and was obsessed with creating the 'perfect' magic item. He was also as crazy as an outhouse rat, if that rat was convinced he was a powerful dragon, polymorphed and trapped in this lowly form. Originally meant as a single encounter NPC, the party absolutely loved the character...hence began the hunt for the Dragognomicon.
Along the way, the party discovered a few of his 'inventions'. Here are a few of my favorites...
Cloak of Awe - On entering a room with the cloak in one's possession, a flock of pigeons fly through the doorway behind you, and trumpet fanfare plays. The larger the room, the more impressive the effect (more pigeons, longer fanfare). Has the unfortunate effect of activating ever time one enters a room. Every. Single. Time.
(Much to my chagrin, our party rogue seized this item. This got put to creative and quite hilarious use in future sessions.)
A set of six potions: Grasshopper's Strength, Rhino's Grace, Mayfly's Endurance, Sheep's Cunning, Lemming's Wisdom, and Warthog's Splendor.
Failed spell scrolls: several pages have stuck together, so instead of Locate Object, Magic Mouth, Burning Hands, etc...we get Burning Mouth (it burns!), Locate Hands (there they are!), Animate Food and Water, Dispel Armor (poof, naked), Power Word: Self (you are the you-iest you you can be).
Ring of Fire Detection, range: touch.
Deck of Many Thongs - each card depicts elderly gnome ladies in lingerie.
Ring of Chicken Rage: chickens hate you.
I am partial to creating defective magic/prank items in my campaigns, like the amulet of weather scrying: once a day it tells you the weather. The cloak of ‘blending’: A magic cloak with four clasps and a personalized name plate of Mae Tagge, but when you cover your head with the hood, the cloak deals increased damage and differing damage type based on the number of clasps connected (1d4 slashing for 1 clasp, 2d6 bludgeoning for 2 clasps, 3d8 piercing for 3 clasps, and 4d10 fire for all 4 clasps). The early zombie/undead warning charm: a magic charm that activates the alarm spell whenever a zombie or undead comes within 30 feet of it at night. Unfortunately, it also has the drawback of luring 1d6 undead/zombies to it’s general location each night. The Super Awesome book of Amazing knowledge! A cursed book of ‘awesome’ knowledge, once attuned, (after 24 hrs in someone’s possession) user can look up any information in the book, the first time will get a super in depth and detailed response. The next 5 uses will be more generic but still provide solid details. After the fifth use, and after every five uses onwards, user loses 1 point of intelligence and the information retrieved becomes much less helpful, but the user continues to think it is super awesome because they don’t realize they are losing intelligence. Until they get to an INT of 2-3, when the book gives out really mundane facts like ‘the sky is blue’ ‘Fire is hot’ ‘the sea is really big and deep’ the belt of disguise self: 3 times a day, when worn, user can cast disguise self on them but only in the form of themself. The ring of invisibility: a ring that when attuned, becomes invisible when worn. The vorpal spork of Fumblez: a rusty spork that when attuned magically replaces user’s weapon with it and decapitates an enemy on a crit fumble, however, on a crit success it intervenes by stabbing user in their leg for 1d4 piercing damage and they must make a DC12 CON save vs. poison (dang tetanus). Wondrous figurine of little yellow duck: a small figurine of a little yellow duck, that magically reappears in the vicinity of a target every night, no matter what they do to get rid of it. (Doesn’t really do that much, but just for the LOLZ, in almost every campaign I run, I throw in a crazy NPC that suffers from the phobia of them always being watched by a duck, so I give my PC’s this item so they can torment that NPC when they run into them)
A particular one I created that was fun is the very pretty rock. It is a small rock with a rune on it. When the command word is spoken it becomes magically pretty compelling anyone who sees it to just stare at it and do nothing else. The save is a DC 20 Wisdom save. Pretty funny when the first few turns of an encounter was just everyone staring at a rock.
I’ve done a much more devious version of that, except it’s a crystal jar/vase with a bunch of money and shiny gems inside of it. However, the opening is too small for a player to reach in and pull out its contents with a clenched hand. And any PC that fails the wisdom save to resist the urge to keep the jar and its contents becomes paranoid like Gollum and distrusts even their fellow party members.
This is pretty funny. Was it the Ring of Random Races?
I made a home brew item known as the trickster cards, and they can be really helpful at times, but it all relies on a roll. for example, one of the cards can explode like a grenade, while one of them turns into a plump goblin that starts dancing and then it melts into a puddle of ice cream.
Some of my creations:
Le Petomane's Magic Beans - If you've never heard of Le Petomane, google him now; amazing. These beans, when eaten, allow a bard to use an action to literally whistle "Dixie" (or any tune of their choosing) from their anatomical nether regions. The effect of the beans lasts 24 hours and is usable as many times as desired in that time. The DM may choose to randomly complicate this by having the bard save against an involuntary performance such as "Your party has failed to surprise the hobgoblins because of the sounds of the "Imperial March" being played by the bard's bowels."
Blue Shield of Death - A beautiful topaz blue kite shield found proudly displayed. When donned, the character's vision goes blue and sees the following message in the air before them "This system has experienced a critical error which cannot be resolved, and will now restart." The character is reset to Lvl 1, with 0 XP. All equipment, wealth, etc. is reset back to starting values.
Wand of S word +2 Creation - May come wrapped in a short scroll, or by Identify, the finder learns that by pointing the wand (which holds a single non-refillable charge) at any character and chanting the magic words "Caca Doo Doo" it gives the character S word with a +2 against dexterity saves. These instructions should be written and given to the player, not spoke to the player aloud. The fun is in the player misreading S_word as Sword. When cast, the wand creates a pile of dooky which the receiving character must roll a dex check to save against slipping and falling prone in.
Izzy the Imp's Wands of Flame - found in a small palm-size box are 1d6 tiny wands with red tips. A wand when rubbed against the side of the box (which has the words 'strike here' printed on it) ignite and burn 1d4 seconds. There is a 15% chance the wand will break when attempting to light, an 85% chance a slight breeze will blow out the flame before any object may be lit from it, and a 10% chance of receiving 1HP burn damage from either holding the wand too long or dropping it on oneself.
This would work well as a legit cursed item if you tone down the effects. Imagine a Blue Spellbook of Death, which gives some benefit but occasionally crashes and purges its pages for a day, or wipes a wizard of their prepared spells. Or even simpler an item which spontaneously un-attunes.
that is just mundane matches, right? (though I think it needs a 99% chance that a slight breeze will blow out the flame before any object may be lit from it from experience with such things... 😹)
Hot Wand of Ice Conjuring - Is supposed to cast ray of frost, ice knife and armor of agathys, but has been permanently targeted by a heat metal, and so the hot and cold cancels out so it just does create or destroy water.
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My homebrew stuff:
Spells, Monsters, Magic Items, Feats, Subclasses.
I am an Archfey, but nobody seems to notice.
Extended Signature
I made my campaign magic heavy, so I felt the need to put in some odd magic items.
Some of them include:
A spoon that makes ice cubes if you scoop up some water with it.
It's not quite an ice cream scoop...
A retrocasual potion that has already helped a guy the party has never met, and needs to be drank by said individual some time in the future or something bad will happen to them because it couldn't have helped them back then. It was a new party, so if I ever wanted a single person deus ex machina before that point, it would have helped them, and be their name on the potion instead of some random person's, so they'd have to decide if they wanted to risk paying the piper.
A pair of defective (not cursed) magical shoes that make the person wearing them walk quieter and jump higher, but it does so by storing up some of their noise and weight, and when too much has been stored up (each on a separate cycle) it either releases a loud boom or becomes incredibly heavy and causes the wearer to fall prone without warning.
First-time DM playing with a friend who has a preference for family-friendly storylines, I needed something cute to spice things up. Enter the Pinwheel of Prestidigitation.
This is intended to be a young wizard's very first attempt at crafting a magic item, which he is exceedingly proud of, but has several issues. Namely, it is meant to mimic the effects of the Prestidigitation cantrip when you spin it... but instead of getting to choose which of its several harmless effects it causes, you roll on a small random table that I made inspired by the description of the actual spell. So you can get something pretty like sparks or music or a nice smell, but also a terrible stench or a faceful of mud (inspired by the "instantly soil" part). Also, when you expend its last charge, it risks falling apart and being lost forever.
I have several good ones. The Pair of Mystical Undies is probably my favorite. It lets you teleport anywhere within 60ft but you cant be wearing anything over the undies for them to function
Look at all this cool stuff I made.
The Pair Of Mystical Underwear, The Good Samaritan, Too Angry To Die, The Dead "Ring"er, Ring Of Magic Learning, Ring Of +1 Awesomeness, Mask of Bullcrap-Vision
I love the Mug of Disapointment
Well you would have to have fast feet too.
I recently released the Slippers of the Somnambulist; while wearing these slippers if you become stunned or unconscious you can choose to become somnambulant which lets you still move around and do things in a limited way, it consumes the item's charge, or you can choose to take exhaustion (after the effect ends) to use it again.
Basically it's a pair of slippers that allow a player to be knocked out cold and still wander away in search of help, or to get some work done while they sleep. It does have some potential for abuse, but it should be manageable (as a KO'd character still takes death saves and fails them if they take damage).
I also like to imagine them like the Escort Boots from Red Dwarf's "Justice" episode, where they do the walking for you (when you're stunned/unconscious at least). 😂
Former D&D Beyond Customer of six years: With the axing of piecemeal purchasing, lack of meaningful development, and toxic moderation the site isn't worth paying for anymore. I remain a free user only until my groups are done migrating from DDB, and if necessary D&D, after which I'm done. There are better systems owned by better companies out there.
I have unsubscribed from all topics and will not reply to messages. My homebrew is now 100% unsupported.
I read the title and would like to tell you about one very silly magic item i made.
When i was a kid i barely discovered D&D and i really liked the idea of it so i went to playing, and i decided to make my own magic items. In my homebrew files i found yesterday a magic item called "Herbert" apparently whenever you kill a monster you get a Herbert token? that's all it had i think i was thinking of making a Herbert shop or something but i thought it was weird and wanted to find a thread to post it on.
So it's basically a lobster/monkey trap for players. Love it!
I've thought of another one: Earmuffs of Muzak. They exist as a pair. Generally, they can be pressed against the head once to play music or to switch to a different type of music. There are 8 settings, not including "off" - this allows for simulation of random listening via dice roll. They play loud enough to decrease Perception checks based on hearing by 3. However, besides their being something to chill to, they also may have the following effects. If two creatures both have their Earmuffs of Muzak tuned to the same music and they are more 200 feet but within 5 miles of each other, they switch places. On the other hand, if they are both tuned to opposite "channels" on the wheel (imagine a roulette wheel) used to operate the Earmuffs (1 being the opposite of 4, 2 being the opposite of 5, 3 being the opposite of 6, etc.), then they each have a 25% chance of falling asleep each minute if the listener is not engaged in a strenuous activity (like combat).
Well, For my players (+ when I was a player) I made items such as "FORGIES" where they throw frogs at the enemy, I've made "Stick" which is a shiny stick that they can beat people with, One of my players asked if I could make an attack called "Eye Poke" which is self explanatory, I made "*BOOK* The Guin Saga" Which "147 volumes + 26 side-story Novels. Start reading the books, this takes forever. this makes your opponent go insane, and as you finish the series plus the side stories, your opponent’s head explodes" (that's the description), also made "Gaslighting" and "Frying Pan"
I remember a time, it was a very Monte Hall environment, we came of with a a spell the was only really useful against small armies... or a large summer picnics. It was dubbed Hot Fudge Army.
Remember the Monte Hall environment. The original version took a number of Clerics, or a high level Magic User with a wish spell. Either way it takes time to set up, but that time doesn't have to be during the battle.
If clerics are doing it, they use Create Food/water, make sure to have enough cleric to cover a good portion of the army. Create about 1,000 gallons of hard frozen ice cream 500 above the army so it drops doing I don't remember how much damage. I just remember it was a lot. If you you want to do the math the formulas are available. Follow with about 1,000 gallons of boiling fudge sauce, followed by a couple hundred pounds of chopped nuts, followed by a 100 lb. (Ok, I'm a yank) cherry bomb, that explodes on impact.
Most armies will break if you drop this anywhere near the commanders.
If I remember right the original idea was thought up by a faerie dragon... :blush:
A very Monte Hall solution to a large army battle!
Now you could set all the spells up on a charm of some kind, that can be pulled out at need, and generally found, if at all, in the place armory.
You could have the same effect with a good & well worded wish spell.
To guarantee they don't return, have a party follow them, and when they stop to camp for the night, wait until the settle in to sleep & repeat Hot Fudge Army. They will never return.