There’s too many different kinds. Have you seen the threads where people go on about the difference between different kinds of swords, and how D&D doesn’t mechanically capture them correctly? Now imagine people going off on whether an English, Irish or Wisconsin cheddar should be the one that gets a d8 damage, or be considered a finesse weapon. It would be complete chaos.
Cheddar is a cheese that comes from the town of Cheddar. Just like Melton Mowbry pork pies only come from Melton Mowbry, and Champagne is a sparkling wine from the Champagne region of France etc. American cheese are plastic slices of yellow stuff.
I think it's pretty obvious why cheese is not a weapon. It would be wildly OP and EVERYONE would just walk around wielding cheese, since it would be superior to all other weapons in the game. Don't even get me started on magic cheese, which is beyond what we define as "OP."
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WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
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White House Wheel has the Special, two-handed and Heavy properties. It deals 4d4 +str bludgeoning damage. Special: You must have at least 18 strength to wield this wheel.
Bluecheese Wedge deals 1d6 +str poison damage.
Nacho Cheese Bowl has two-handed and loading properties. It deals 1d8 +dex fire damage at a range of 5:15. Its ammunition is hot Nacho cheese. You may consume the ammunition and gain 1 temporary hit point.
i think when people talk about cheesing its specifically using RAW in a way that was not intended. if they made cheesing an actual weapon it wouldnt be cheesing anymore
Can I bind my massive gouda wheel rind and strap it to my arm? If so, what feats do I need to use it as Botha weapon and give me an AC shield bonus, while also wielding something in my free hand. If I have a crossbow and the requisite feats, can I use my free action to stick my crossbow into my gouda, reload by pulling quarrels I've already stuck in the gouda, then use my attack action?
What about cheesecloth slings? If I'm using a big wheel can I add my str bonus to my missile attack?
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Jander Sunstar is the thinking person's Drizzt, fight me.
A big wheel of heavy cheddar, filled with REALLY old Blue Cheese. It smashes open on impact. Lets assume getting hit with a wheel of cheese deals either 2d8 or 2d6 damage. +2d6 poison from the blue cheese. Combine this with Divine Smite and you have the best damage dealing EVER.
EDIT: Brainwave. FLAME TONGUE CHEESE WHEEL!!!!! Just imagine a flaming wheel of cheese flying through the air at you. That's gonna make anyone run for it... if they survive (Hint: not likely).
A big wheel of heavy cheddar, filled with REALLY old Blue Cheese. It smashes open on impact. Lets assume getting hit with a wheel of cheese deals either 2d8 or 2d6 damage. +2d6 poison from the blue cheese. Combine this with Divine Smite and you have the best damage dealing EVER.
EDIT: Brainwave. FLAME TONGUE CHEESE WHEEL!!!!! Just imagine a flaming wheel of cheese flying through the air at you. That's gonna make anyone run for it... if they survive (Hint: not likely).
Someone from the Supreme Court of sauce should know a flaming wheel of cheese is nacho way to create the foundational fondue for a cheese sauce golem. Or maybe it is, but the pages of the manual of cheese golem creation are stuck together by queso finger prints and thus lost to time and those who wash their hands between snacks and arcane studies.
I think it's pretty obvious why cheese is not a weapon. It would be wildly OP and EVERYONE would just walk around wielding cheese, since it would be superior to all other weapons in the game. Don't even get me started on magic cheese, which is beyond what we define as "OP."
Why isn't cheese considered a weapon?
There’s too many different kinds. Have you seen the threads where people go on about the difference between different kinds of swords, and how D&D doesn’t mechanically capture them correctly?
Now imagine people going off on whether an English, Irish or Wisconsin cheddar should be the one that gets a d8 damage, or be considered a finesse weapon. It would be complete chaos.
You can do 1d4 bludgeoning damage with a cheese wheel, so what are you talking about?
Yes, but martial classes shouldn't need a feat for proficiency. And I want a 2d8 heavy wheel of Gouda.
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Don't know, if one would hit me with a lot of cheese, I would probably start regenerating. Cheese is life!
Cheddar is a cheese that comes from the town of Cheddar. Just like Melton Mowbry pork pies only come from Melton Mowbry, and Champagne is a sparkling wine from the Champagne region of France etc. American cheese are plastic slices of yellow stuff.
I think it's pretty obvious why cheese is not a weapon. It would be wildly OP and EVERYONE would just walk around wielding cheese, since it would be superior to all other weapons in the game. Don't even get me started on magic cheese, which is beyond what we define as "OP."
WOTC lies. We know that WOTC lies. WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. We know that WOTC knows that we know that WOTC lies. And still they lie.
Because of the above (a paraphrase from Orwell) I no longer post to the forums -- PM me if you need help or anything.
White House Wheel has the Special, two-handed and Heavy properties. It deals 4d4 +str bludgeoning damage. Special: You must have at least 18 strength to wield this wheel.
Bluecheese Wedge deals 1d6 +str poison damage.
Nacho Cheese Bowl has two-handed and loading properties. It deals 1d8 +dex fire damage at a range of 5:15. Its ammunition is hot Nacho cheese. You may consume the ammunition and gain 1 temporary hit point.
I don't think so, Gouda is too soft. Maybe a sharp cheddar.
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"............anybody got any potatoes? We could drop a potato in each hole an' see which ones get viciously mauled by horrible monsters?"
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An really old Parmigiano would also be hard and sharp. Maybe a strong Roquefort, soft but counts as biological weapon.
i think when people talk about cheesing its specifically using RAW in a way that was not intended. if they made cheesing an actual weapon it wouldnt be cheesing anymore
"h"
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Ok, OP, I gotta ask, when u started this thread, did u know this would just be a massive joke party?
Can I bind my massive gouda wheel rind and strap it to my arm? If so, what feats do I need to use it as Botha weapon and give me an AC shield bonus, while also wielding something in my free hand. If I have a crossbow and the requisite feats, can I use my free action to stick my crossbow into my gouda, reload by pulling quarrels I've already stuck in the gouda, then use my attack action?
What about cheesecloth slings? If I'm using a big wheel can I add my str bonus to my missile attack?
Jander Sunstar is the thinking person's Drizzt, fight me.
Have you considered swiss army cheese, the versatile slashing weapon?
You cannot use a shield to attack. You'd have to custom gouda ring weapon and then give it + to AC.
I think if you use something like Stinky Bishop, it would do poison damage instead of SPB.
"Sooner or later, your Players are going to smash your railroad into a sandbox."
-Vedexent
"real life is a super high CR."
-OboeLauren
"............anybody got any potatoes? We could drop a potato in each hole an' see which ones get viciously mauled by horrible monsters?"
-Ilyara Thundertale
A big wheel of heavy cheddar, filled with REALLY old Blue Cheese. It smashes open on impact. Lets assume getting hit with a wheel of cheese deals either 2d8 or 2d6 damage. +2d6 poison from the blue cheese. Combine this with Divine Smite and you have the best damage dealing EVER.
EDIT: Brainwave. FLAME TONGUE CHEESE WHEEL!!!!! Just imagine a flaming wheel of cheese flying through the air at you. That's gonna make anyone run for it... if they survive (Hint: not likely).
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I'm so proud of all of you. *wipes a tear from my eye*.
Also, do yourself a favour and look up the Cheshire Mammoth Cheese. Now THAT'S a weapon.
Someone from the Supreme Court of sauce should know a flaming wheel of cheese is nacho way to create the foundational fondue for a cheese sauce golem. Or maybe it is, but the pages of the manual of cheese golem creation are stuck together by queso finger prints and thus lost to time and those who wash their hands between snacks and arcane studies.
Jander Sunstar is the thinking person's Drizzt, fight me.
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