this might not count, but everyone in my party had very high passive perception except for our cleric, so the amount of times i had to say "except for (cleric's name)" is astounding.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
I am a human person very good at doing human person things, yes yes, i enjoy normal human person things like wearing clothes on my skin and walking with my leg, yes yes, am not a yuan-ti infiltrator, am human person
IF YOU'RE READING THIS GO WATCH INFINITY TRAIN ON HBOMAX
this might not count, but everyone in my party had very high passive perception except for our cleric, so the amount of times i had to say "except for (cleric's name)" is astounding.
It counts. :)
(There's a series where the DM's constantly having to say, "Except the two Humans," in the many, many low-light situations.)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Not a quote, but a series of events that had me dying. Sorry, long.
A thief and a ranger were trying to solo an evil cult that they didn't know much about. They knew there was a gathering taking place but were not sure where in this forest. So the ranger decides to call out for animal help. Eventually he makes contact with an owl. After a leeeeeeengthy exchange where the ranger kept trying to get the owl's name, with the owl trying his best to explain he didn't know what a "name" was...
Ranger: "Mr. Owl, would you please fly around the forest, locate the hidden temple, and give us a scouting report on how many humanoids are outside?"
Owl: "No."
After another leeeeengthy exchange where the owl does his best to explain that he needs to spend most of the night hunting for mice and other rodents, he doesn't have time to waste flying around on some fool errand for the humans. They agree to a deal... they will find some mice for him and in exchange he will scout for them. The ranger makes some survival checks and eventually finds some squirrels sleeping inside a tree.
Another leeeeengthy exchange occurs with the ranger trying to convince the squirrels that he is a peanut delivery man and that he has many handfuls of peanuts for them but they have to come out and sign for them. The squirrels failed their insight rolls and fell for it. But the ranger forgot to tell the thief he needed to be prepared to sneak attack/grab the squirrels. As soon as they saw the two humans, they ran back inside the tree. Now, lucky for the thief and ranger, they had an adamantine short sword (auto-crit on attacks on objects) so they hack the tree apart, kill the squirrels and pull them out. Its a horrible, time consuming mess. Eventually the owl reveals he has been watching them for the tail end of this ordeal. He knows where the bad guys are but now he wants the adamantine sword instead of the squirrels - he sees potential in revolutionizing the hunting process. They succeed in persuading the owl he doesn't have the capability of wielding a sword properly and they proceed with the original dead squirrels for info deal.
So now they now where the bad guys are, but we had wasted almost the entire session BS-ing with a GD owl.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
PC - Ethel - Human - Lvl 4 Necromancer - Undying Dragons * Serge Marshblade - Human - Lvl 5 Eldritch Knight - Hoard of the Dragon Queen
DM -(Homebrew) Heroes of Bardstown *Red Dead Annihilation: ToA *Where the Cold Winds Blow : DoIP * Covetous, Dragonish Thoughts: HotDQ * Red Wine, Black Rose: CoS * Greyhawk: Tides of War
"As you make your beetle jerky, you remember something your father used to tell you back in Ravnica: Slap into a Slim Jim"
I must know the story behind this.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
Not a quote, but a series of events that had me dying. Sorry, long.
A thief and a ranger were trying to solo an evil cult that they didn't know much about. They knew there was a gathering taking place but were not sure where in this forest. So the ranger decides to call out for animal help. Eventually he makes contact with an owl. After a leeeeeeengthy exchange where the ranger kept trying to get the owl's name, with the owl trying his best to explain he didn't know what a "name" was...
Ranger: "Mr. Owl, would you please fly around the forest, locate the hidden temple, and give us a scouting report on how many humanoids are outside?"
Owl: "No."
After another leeeeengthy exchange where the owl does his best to explain that he needs to spend most of the night hunting for mice and other rodents, he doesn't have time to waste flying around on some fool errand for the humans. They agree to a deal... they will find some mice for him and in exchange he will scout for them. The ranger makes some survival checks and eventually finds some squirrels sleeping inside a tree.
Another leeeeengthy exchange occurs with the ranger trying to convince the squirrels that he is a peanut delivery man and that he has many handfuls of peanuts for them but they have to come out and sign for them. The squirrels failed their insight rolls and fell for it. But the ranger forgot to tell the thief he needed to be prepared to sneak attack/grab the squirrels. As soon as they saw the two humans, they ran back inside the tree. Now, lucky for the thief and ranger, they had an adamantine short sword (auto-crit on attacks on objects) so they hack the tree apart, kill the squirrels and pull them out. Its a horrible, time consuming mess. Eventually the owl reveals he has been watching them for the tail end of this ordeal. He knows where the bad guys are but now he wants the adamantine sword instead of the squirrels - he sees potential in revolutionizing the hunting process. They succeed in persuading the owl he doesn't have the capability of wielding a sword properly and they proceed with the original dead squirrels for info deal.
So now they now where the bad guys are, but we had wasted almost the entire session BS-ing with a GD owl.
"As you make your beetle jerky, you remember something your father used to tell you back in Ravnica: Slap into a Slim Jim"
I must know the story behind this.
I'm running an Out of the Abyss campaign. For one of the random encounters I rolled the giant fire beetles, which got killed and harvested for glands and meat. The party didn't want the meat to go bad, so they tried to make jerky out of it. One of the party is a Minotaur who was kidnapped from the Ravnica setting from interdimensional slave traders. He has the outlander background, so he was in charge of smoking the beetle jerky. And then things went off the rails a bit and apparently Ravnica has Slim Jims.
"As you make your beetle jerky, you remember something your father used to tell you back in Ravnica: Slap into a Slim Jim"
I must know the story behind this.
I'm running an Out of the Abyss campaign. For one of the random encounters I rolled the giant fire beetles, which got killed and harvested for glands and meat. The party didn't want the meat to go bad, so they tried to make jerky out of it. One of the party is a Minotaur who was kidnapped from the Ravnica setting from interdimensional slave traders. He has the outlander background, so he was in charge of smoking the beetle jerky. And then things went off the rails a bit and apparently Ravnica has Slim Jims.
I see.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
Or didn’t even go to school. Figuratively, of course.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
PC with a claw impaling his chest: “That wasn’t very nice, sir.”
That reminds me of when I am playing with my family, we sometimes say "ow" in a very monotone way as a joke whenever our characters get hit. It's especially funny when a small amount of damage is dealt to us. One damage is the equivalent of being pricked by a needle.
PC with a claw impaling his chest: “That wasn’t very nice, sir.”
That reminds me of when I am playing with my family, we sometimes say "ow" in a very monotone way as a joke whenever our characters get hit. It's especially funny when a small amount of damage is dealt to us. One damage is the equivalent of being pricked by a needle.
Except that means four pricks of a needle could kill the average person. HP is confusing.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
Paraphrased - To a disgraced bad person who's about to be subjected to more humiliation rather than death:
"We definitely could kill you, but it's no fun if you want to die."
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
I'm not giving you any context besides who said it.
My Changeling Warlock to a helpful NPC: "Okay, remember how I used my mind to create a sapphire statue of a dragon breathing solidified lightning in the Plane of the Chaotic Alien-Frogs in order to trick those two Blue Dragons to become shadow dragons completely controlled by me? What I need you to do is get friendly with this magic rock, go through the portal that I tied down using a fishing line to that place to turn these ball bearings into swords made of fire. I just need enough of them to outfit our whole army of 300 people. Get to work and I'll be back later. My patron texted me with blood to tell me to go kill some fire-head wizards in a pit underneath a sand mountain."
NPC nods while looking at my character like he's lost his mind: ". . . I didn't understand 90% of what you just said, but sure. I will do that. Don't get killed by those fireheads!"
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Please check out my homebrew, I would appreciate feedback:
NPC nods while looking at my character like he's lost his mind: ". . . I didn't understand 90% of what you just said, but sure. I will do that. Don't get killed by those fireheads!"
PC with a claw impaling his chest: “That wasn’t very nice, sir.”
That reminds me of when I am playing with my family, we sometimes say "ow" in a very monotone way as a joke whenever our characters get hit. It's especially funny when a small amount of damage is dealt to us. One damage is the equivalent of being pricked by a needle.
Except that means four pricks of a needle could kill the average person. HP is confusing.
PC with a claw impaling his chest: “That wasn’t very nice, sir.”
That reminds me of when I am playing with my family, we sometimes say "ow" in a very monotone way as a joke whenever our characters get hit. It's especially funny when a small amount of damage is dealt to us. One damage is the equivalent of being pricked by a needle.
Except that means four pricks of a needle could kill the average person. HP is confusing.
More like the commoners need an HP buff.
Yeah, commoners should probably have around 6 or 7 HP. Honestly though, slapping someone without the intention to cause actual harm or poking someone with a needle shouldn't cause damage. That's just my interpretation of rules, though.
All stars fade. Some stars forever fall. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Homebrew (Mostly Outdated):Magic Items,Monsters,Spells,Subclasses ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
this might not count, but everyone in my party had very high passive perception except for our cleric, so the amount of times i had to say "except for (cleric's name)" is astounding.
I am a human person very good at doing human person things, yes yes, i enjoy normal human person things like wearing clothes on my skin and walking with my leg, yes yes, am not a yuan-ti infiltrator, am human person
IF YOU'RE READING THIS GO WATCH INFINITY TRAIN ON HBOMAX
It counts. :)
(There's a series where the DM's constantly having to say, "Except the two Humans," in the many, many low-light situations.)
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Not a quote, but a series of events that had me dying. Sorry, long.
A thief and a ranger were trying to solo an evil cult that they didn't know much about. They knew there was a gathering taking place but were not sure where in this forest. So the ranger decides to call out for animal help. Eventually he makes contact with an owl. After a leeeeeeengthy exchange where the ranger kept trying to get the owl's name, with the owl trying his best to explain he didn't know what a "name" was...
Ranger: "Mr. Owl, would you please fly around the forest, locate the hidden temple, and give us a scouting report on how many humanoids are outside?"
Owl: "No."
After another leeeeengthy exchange where the owl does his best to explain that he needs to spend most of the night hunting for mice and other rodents, he doesn't have time to waste flying around on some fool errand for the humans. They agree to a deal... they will find some mice for him and in exchange he will scout for them. The ranger makes some survival checks and eventually finds some squirrels sleeping inside a tree.
Another leeeeengthy exchange occurs with the ranger trying to convince the squirrels that he is a peanut delivery man and that he has many handfuls of peanuts for them but they have to come out and sign for them. The squirrels failed their insight rolls and fell for it. But the ranger forgot to tell the thief he needed to be prepared to sneak attack/grab the squirrels. As soon as they saw the two humans, they ran back inside the tree. Now, lucky for the thief and ranger, they had an adamantine short sword (auto-crit on attacks on objects) so they hack the tree apart, kill the squirrels and pull them out. Its a horrible, time consuming mess. Eventually the owl reveals he has been watching them for the tail end of this ordeal. He knows where the bad guys are but now he wants the adamantine sword instead of the squirrels - he sees potential in revolutionizing the hunting process. They succeed in persuading the owl he doesn't have the capability of wielding a sword properly and they proceed with the original dead squirrels for info deal.
So now they now where the bad guys are, but we had wasted almost the entire session BS-ing with a GD owl.
PC - Ethel - Human - Lvl 4 Necromancer - Undying Dragons * Serge Marshblade - Human - Lvl 5 Eldritch Knight - Hoard of the Dragon Queen
DM - (Homebrew) Heroes of Bardstown * Red Dead Annihilation: ToA * Where the Cold Winds Blow : DoIP * Covetous, Dragonish Thoughts: HotDQ * Red Wine, Black Rose: CoS * Greyhawk: Tides of War
I must know the story behind this.
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
My homebrew setting: https://www.dndbeyond.com/forums/d-d-beyond-general/story-lore/94809-wakai-a-setting-inspired-by-japanese-folklore-and
This account is kinda old and I haven’t used it in a while
I loved every bit of this.
I'm running an Out of the Abyss campaign. For one of the random encounters I rolled the giant fire beetles, which got killed and harvested for glands and meat. The party didn't want the meat to go bad, so they tried to make jerky out of it. One of the party is a Minotaur who was kidnapped from the Ravnica setting from interdimensional slave traders. He has the outlander background, so he was in charge of smoking the beetle jerky. And then things went off the rails a bit and apparently Ravnica has Slim Jims.
Hombrew: Way of Wresting, Circle of Sacrifice
I see.
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
My homebrew setting: https://www.dndbeyond.com/forums/d-d-beyond-general/story-lore/94809-wakai-a-setting-inspired-by-japanese-folklore-and
This account is kinda old and I haven’t used it in a while
Argument between Wizard & Sorcerer:
Sorcerer: "Why does the Wizard get the lion's share of the gold?!"
Wizard: "Because I need to pay for all these damn spells!"
Sorcerer: "Oh, poor Wizard...and I do mean POOR Wizard."
Wizard: "Go ahead, laugh it up...at least I went to college. Where'd you go...art school?"
- later on, after a running gag that the Wizard is basically broke most of the time -
Sorcerer: "Hey, buddy; spot me a few coins? Oh wait...I you've got any."
Wizard: "That's great; mock me for having an actual profession."
Sorcerer: "A profession that basically spends more money than you can earn."
Wizard: "AT LEAST I WASN'T BORN WITH A WAND UP MY *SS...!!"
Sorcerer: (jangles bag of money) "Wanna hold my sack?"
Wizard: "TURN MY PAGES, PEASANT!"
Sorcerer: "Fiscally, you ARE a peasant!"
Wizard: "SH*T OUT ANY GOOD SPELLS RECENTLY?!"
Sorcerer: "YEAH, MIRROR IMAGE...AND THEY ALL LOOKED LIKE YOU!"
Wizard: "HAVE FUN ON YOUR DATE WITH BIGBY'S HAND TONIGHT!"
Bard: (frantically writing all this down) "Slow down! Slow down! All of this is PURE GOLD...!!"
(consequently, both of them agreed the health care...i.e. the Cleric...was pretty good)
I mean, sorcerers are just wizards who slept in class and somehow got an A, anyways, so . . .
Or didn’t even go to school. Figuratively, of course.
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
My homebrew setting: https://www.dndbeyond.com/forums/d-d-beyond-general/story-lore/94809-wakai-a-setting-inspired-by-japanese-folklore-and
This account is kinda old and I haven’t used it in a while
“Mind ya own character!”
”Is they’re any hag goop left?”
PC charging into battle: “I knew this was a bad idea!”
DM: “No, you didn’t. You just said that it was a good idea.”
PC: “But the hag doesn’t know that!”
[Monk has a 20 minute long conversation with Paladin trying to convince him to deal nonlethal damage with the final attack.]
Paladin: “8. I miss. It’s [the monk’s] turn now.”
PC with a claw impaling his chest: “That wasn’t very nice, sir.”
RIP Tavern.
All hail King Jovan Fluffycloud Prince
Teleporting elf monk supremacy!, but druids are better
[Cactus]Waffles!”I don’t have any good quotes to put in my sig.” -Me
That reminds me of when I am playing with my family, we sometimes say "ow" in a very monotone way as a joke whenever our characters get hit. It's especially funny when a small amount of damage is dealt to us. One damage is the equivalent of being pricked by a needle.
Except that means four pricks of a needle could kill the average person. HP is confusing.
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
My homebrew setting: https://www.dndbeyond.com/forums/d-d-beyond-general/story-lore/94809-wakai-a-setting-inspired-by-japanese-folklore-and
This account is kinda old and I haven’t used it in a while
Paraphrased - To a disgraced bad person who's about to be subjected to more humiliation rather than death:
"We definitely could kill you, but it's no fun if you want to die."
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Ima eat their flesh. Ok?
I'm not giving you any context besides who said it.
My Changeling Warlock to a helpful NPC: "Okay, remember how I used my mind to create a sapphire statue of a dragon breathing solidified lightning in the Plane of the Chaotic Alien-Frogs in order to trick those two Blue Dragons to become shadow dragons completely controlled by me? What I need you to do is get friendly with this magic rock, go through the portal that I tied down using a fishing line to that place to turn these ball bearings into swords made of fire. I just need enough of them to outfit our whole army of 300 people. Get to work and I'll be back later. My patron texted me with blood to tell me to go kill some fire-head wizards in a pit underneath a sand mountain."
NPC nods while looking at my character like he's lost his mind: ". . . I didn't understand 90% of what you just said, but sure. I will do that. Don't get killed by those fireheads!"
Please check out my homebrew, I would appreciate feedback:
Spells, Monsters, Subclasses, Races, Arcknight Class, Occultist Class, World, Enigmatic Esoterica forms
I would react that way, as well.
More like the commoners need an HP buff.
Yeah, commoners should probably have around 6 or 7 HP. Honestly though, slapping someone without the intention to cause actual harm or poking someone with a needle shouldn't cause damage. That's just my interpretation of rules, though.
All stars fade. Some stars forever fall.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homebrew (Mostly Outdated): Magic Items, Monsters, Spells, Subclasses
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
“Can we use prestidigitation to cover him with wasp pheromones?”
”Huh, I didn’t know Shakespeare would end up a metaphor for D&D spell casters.”
RIP Tavern.
All hail King Jovan Fluffycloud Prince
Teleporting elf monk supremacy!, but druids are better
[Cactus]Waffles!”I don’t have any good quotes to put in my sig.” -Me